Personally I feel it's the former. I think a lot of TRPers confuse correlation with causation when it comes to the Alpha/Beta dichotomy. IMO, attractive guys tend to be assholes because they're attractive and not the other way around. IME guys act Beta in relationships when they're dating up in looks because they know they can be easily replaced. Women purposely date down in looks so they can get a guy to be beta towards them. Women tend to dislike betas and go for alphas only because the alphas are more physically attractive. The perfect guy is hot and successful but Beta and sensitive to our needs.

This belief stems from my personal experiences. My first relationship with a guy was in college. This guy was very beta and treated me extremely well. Unfortunately I was not physically attracted to him (he was overweight). His beta personality made me stay with him longer because I appreciated how well he treated me.

The current guy I'm seeing is less beta towards me but much more physically attractive (tall, lean athletic body, cute face). His body alone elicits a primal response I never had with my ex. Sex with my ex was something I did for him, but sex with this guy is something I WANT.

I think women are socialized to prioritize stability over sexual satisfaction in a relationship and often date down in looks. As a result they often end up bitter and unsatisfied. I'm much less neurotic now that I'm being sexually satisfied. With my ex trivial things about him would bother me, but with this current guy I just dgaf. This guy is not really alpha in behavior at all (he's pretty shy and insecure because he had bad acne in his teens), but I still really want him sexually. He just doesn't fawn over me like my ex did because he knows he can replace me easily with an equally attractive girl (his abundance mentality is a consequence of his attractiveness, not a contributer).