Let's talk about dread game some more

roe_ · 2014-04-14T22:40:16+00:00

Dread game is really just emotional abuse and manipulation. If a woman were to use dread game on a red pill man I bet they would get upset about female privilege.

Old_Pine_Tree · 2014-04-15T01:19:42+00:00

There's a view that all relationship problems can be solved by intellectual discussion. In my experience, this is not the case; some issues can be resolved this way, but some are only resolved by instilling a fear that if things don't change, it's over. Whether this is intentional abuse or an unintentional preference for action rather than talk is up for debate; the point is that it can be effective, and can lead to greater relationship satisfaction by obvious metrics.

[deleted] · 2014-04-14T22:23:05+00:00

[permanently deleted]

GaiusScaevolus · 2014-04-15T01:30:00+00:00

Their is no question here. So I'll ask you one;

Do you consider a woman withholding sex in a relationship emotional abuse?

fiat_lux_ · 2014-04-14T22:36:10+00:00

He calls cheating "the thermonuclear option". That is the last option. If someone honestly considered a thermonuclear option for an international conflict today then there are two possibilities:

That person is just not a moral person so it's wasted effort trying to convince him to behave otherwise.
There really isn't another option.

Tl;dr: I dont take thermonuclear options seriously.

then there's no real reason to even call it dread game anymore aside from that it's a manosphere term and you want to look cool.

If you think that's the case, then why do you care?

No, the advice he offers is pure emotional abuse in my estimation

It's manipulative, for sure.

A lot of tailored advice is made to sound manipulative though. Tailored to sound beneficial to the recipient at the expense of others. Many people have innate distrust of advice that seems too beneficial to everyone. Seems too unrealistic.

Eg some salesmen might claim that you're fucking them or other customers over by snatching this unreal offer.

You could thus, in a way, consider that the very tone of the advice given is emotionally manipulating rpers. Maybe they need it. I certainly needed some crutches at various stages of my life.

Related and possibly of interest:

There was an analogous thread on trp recently about 5 ways a woman can manipulate men. The top upvoted response from rpers was that they don't even mind. The suggested behaviours were favourable to them.

Of course, some of the responses on the linked blog were negative. Clearly thoughts, and the "idea of being manipulated" are enraging to some.

GridReXX · 2014-04-15T00:37:47+00:00

Any woman who puts up with dread game is as pitiful as any man who would stay in a relationship where he's emotionally abused.

myfriendscantknow · 2014-04-14T22:17:36+00:00

Why can't we agree with the concept but not adhere exactly to his practice? Frankly, I don't think he made this up so as have it a name.

myfriendscantknow · 2014-04-14T22:20:24+00:00

If dread game didn't work we wouldn't use it.

There was a study posted recently showing women lose their sex drive in secure relationships.

There should always be an underlying soft dread. Nothing torturess, she just knows you could get other women if you wanted to and that you have standards.

If she throws a tantrum, is disrespectful or is becoming apathetic you up the dread. Distance yourself, if she keeps it up start drifting.

The thing with dread game is it works better if it's legitimate. If she is disrespectful, or crosses boundaries she knows you have, then the relationship is dieing, start talking to other women and creating leads.

It's up to her to respect you and put effort into keeping you around.

rulenumber303 · 2014-04-15T03:31:28+00:00

Yeah whatever, girls do this sort of stuff to guys too. Just wearing a brighter lipstick colour but only when you go out alone is enough to wake many dudes up.

W-Z-R · 2014-04-15T17:07:02+00:00

It's abuse in my mind

[deleted] · 2014-04-15T23:54:03+00:00

These misunderstandings are common if you do not understand human social interactions and sexual dynamics. Those people struggle to separate the principle behind an idea and the differences in its application.

Dread game, to sanitize the term for your benefit, is calling someone's bluff. It is used when someone in the relationship is demonstrating, directly or indirectly, that they consider you low value and attempt to take advantage of you thinking that you value them so much that you will put up with it.

Think of a car dealer who thinks he has some loser hooked on a car deal and tries to take value off a trade-in or work the car loan terms to his advantage.

Men and women do the same thing in relationships, which is why we say "You have to be willing to walk." No relationship is worth being disrespected, and when you realize that it's happening to you, using dread game is the best way of calling their bluff rather than walking away altogether.

Calibrating the level of your response by calling their bluff is another issue entirely. You don't have to respond to your partner not taking out the garbage by telling them that you're going out to get laid.

Also, using dread game on people who haven't tried to take advantage of you is essentially being the bad guy (viewing the other person as low value and seeing how far you can push your luck).

The more you extend such a hypothetical, the more it appears like it resembles basic macroeconomic principles. Like a market value of sorts...

Exner2 · 2014-04-17T17:18:40+00:00

I can't tell if this article is trying to be funny or not. If not, I think the proposed "advice" is pretty fucking ridiculous, and not really possible to employ over time with the same person.

That said, I will admit that real "dread," not manufactured, can be effective. But it also drives people nuts, in a bad way. Hard to be in a stable, lasting relationship if high (or even moderate) levels of dread are in play.

drok007 · 2014-04-14T23:32:13+00:00

I think this type of thing is only necessary on terrible people in the first place. You don't try and subdue people who already cooperate and work with you, because why mess up a good thing?

If someone is unreasonable with you and not because of your previous actions, why does it matter what you do? Fight fire with fire. Firefighters actual do that in certain circumstances when it's necessary. It just isn't always the case.

Me personally? I'd rather take the effort to find a girl where those extreme actions are not necessary than find a girl who is so shitty it's required to do those sorts of things to keep her from being shitty.

jacks1000 · 2014-04-15T01:10:24+00:00

I don't think most of us are opposed to having an adult conversation about the course of a life relationship.

I think I get it now. Blue pillers and feminists seem sort of autistic, likely unable to read body language and need things spelled out in great detail. Hence all the talk of "communication" which tends to mean verbal communication and "dialogue."

"Emotional abuse" is a term that is too subjective and too overloaded by feminists to be useful. What they purposefully pretend to misunderstand is that people are free to leave a relationship they are no longer happy with, and in fact, people do this all the time.

So I read that Roissy article again. I was in a relationship in which we both did similar things. On the outside, a bunch of feminist busybodies would have called it "abusive" and some would even grudgingly admit she was "abusive" too. But for us, it was a super hot game we played with each other that led to amazing, mindblowing sex and very intimate moments. She was a dancer and into theater. She loved drama.

I guess you can call it "emotional abuse" if you want to, but neither she nor I have any reason to give a shit what you people think. So I think it's best all around if blue pill types stick to their own kind. Just realize that not everyone is so crippled in interpersonal non-verbal communication and baffled by any human interaction that is not spelled out in great detail regarding power balances and enthusiastic verbal consent.

I imagine blue pillers have relationships like this where they keep a list to make sure everything is "equal."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oTmg4bfhBsk

"I can't stay in this relationship if we don't have more sex",

Actually I've read feminists claiming that this is rape in college publications. You see, it's a "threat" so if she "gives in" because she wants the relationship, she's been raped. Of course, it's always presumed that it's the man demanding sex and the woman holding out, which is hilarious and telling in itself.

One thing I've learned from writing fiction is that when you just sketch an outline, people will fill in their own details and put their own spin on what's happening. What some people have termed "horror" others have said it was so "erotic" they masturbated to it.

Feminists fill in the details and those details say more about them than the authors they are criticizing. It takes two to tell a story, and feminists pretty much have just have one side to the story: abuse rape misogyny! Plus they always write the female side as if she's some passive doormat that doesn't understand "game" or can't figure out if her man is being a jerk, playful, or angry. That's why feminists have the need to blabber on about these things at length, because they don't understand them on an intuitive level.

newguyacct · 2014-04-14T22:43:00+00:00

You wouldn't need to use dread game on a unicorn.

squidward4444 · 2014-04-14T23:34:33+00:00

Where are the question marks?

Title	Let's talk about dread game some more
Author	myfriendscantknow
Upvotes	4
Comments	155
Date	April 14, 2014 10:08 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/231iff/lets_talk_about_dread_game_some_more/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/lets-talk-about-dread-game-some-more.285899 https://theredarchive.com/post/285899

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