Rationalisation of love and dating culture

TheBookOfSeil · 2020-10-10T13:45:59+00:00

It's a sad realization but some people only act on their animal programming. They are only interested in people who they already find physically attractive and everyone outside of that threshold is politely held at arm's distance, and sometimes, not so politely, too. That includes leaving someone when they find better and can make the switch as well. Very little is held sacred to them aside from what they want and what they stand to benefit.

For other people, I think that topics like this can bring out the behaviors listed above (like online dating and talking in this sub) but things are a little different for them. I've been interested in not-so-attractive women before (and girls when I was younger) because I liked other things about them.

Every range of these types of people exist on the continuum.

LooseIndication · 2020-10-10T15:18:15+00:00

Either you accept it or not, you are a machine and an animal.

That doesn't makes you less human. It is part of being human.

You are not an ethereal being, made of clouds, existing outside of the physical world.

You bleed like any other animal, you are made of the same atoms than your car. You consume carbon for energy, like machines do.

You are not over the laws of physics.

You exist to propagate your DNA, and for that purpose, your DNA has implemented shortcuts in your brain, that take control over you.

Those shortcuts are reflex and feelings. They override your brain, and your opinions.

Women evolved strong feelings that take control of them, even against their "interest", because the woman that made alpha babies were more successful propagating their DNA on the past. The women that prioritized other things ceased to exist.

Romantic love is an artificial fabrication of beta males. It worked for beta males as long as they had power.

Today, beta males had been reduced to irrelevancy, and their romantic concept of love died with them.

goneaway2thewind · 2020-10-10T09:23:54+00:00

Only naive people believe love of the person's character sustains relationships.

the-red_woman · 2020-10-10T10:11:04+00:00

Yes the idea that humans are instinct driven with no capability for individual and moral choices is very wide spread in the pill communities. It’s like people have never lived and seen the many who live outside of these so called norms.

AnonPinkLady · 2020-10-10T11:01:53+00:00

I strongly agree that dating, realistically, is incredibly emotional and most relationships spark with very little thought into the things red pill posters are convinced they are all focused on. I often have a big argument against most red pill theory that is, how can we blame women for "choosing" certain morally corrupt partners when said people are frequently manipulators.

I feel the hatred of women in loveless relationships all stems from a place of being convinced that we all somehow chose these partners exactly as they are to us now. When in reality absolutely no one chooses to be abused, they choose what they think is a lovely person and time reveals the truth. The heart of red pill is an intense amount of victim blaming and Red pillers never stop to ask if any of their criticisms are even fair or what the true answer is to all of it.

I have asked red pillers what they propose is the solution to the supposed unfairness in the dating world and all they insist is women choosing partners more alike to them as if love and attraction is really much of a choice. And to what point? To have women choose them that dont really want them? What kind relationships would those be?

It all falls apart when you remember that the root of love is freedom and desire.

jdobrila · 2020-10-10T13:14:57+00:00

Love acts [generally] independently from reason, similarly to abject fears or jealousy. I say this as a descriptive and not normative claim.

We do however rationalize things all the time– whether we're aware of it or not. Jealousy and envy is a great example.

2020-10-10T15:04:26+00:00

The actual problem is people not understanding what love is and thinking it is some sort of magical solution to everything and that it is not driven by your your instincts. Hint: No it is not, yes it is and life is not a disney movie.

wtknight · 2020-10-10T12:56:40+00:00

Red Pill is really a tool for getting casual sex. I agree with you that it doesn't work well for things like dating and love. I also think that FDS is just as incompatible with dating and love. When a guy is naturally in love with a woman, he wants to simp for her. And when a woman is in love with a guy, she wants to simp for him. That's how it has worked in every relationship that I've been in, and even after 10+ years of marriage my wife and I still "simp" for each other and don't think about things like "keeping frame" or "using sex as a reward for good male behavior."

Some guys will swear that TRP works well with relationships, but I just don't see it. Both men and women shouldn't need "rules" for a relationship to work. Rules are just necessary so that one doesn't get taken advantage of someone who isn't actually in love with you. Once mutual love is established, "rule systems" like TRP and FDS should be thrown out the window.

michael1962-01 · 2020-10-10T09:26:57+00:00

As a 25yo involuntary celibate male you might still think that everyone is different and the concept of love holds true in some cases.

As a old experienced (alpha, sociopathic, high IQ?) male with a young 'loving me' beauty at my side i can tell you that rationalisation of behavior and analyzing it is the core of any successful strategy.

So what do you want to express with your post?

That there is someone out there waiting for you to 'love you like you are'?

Or that neither RP BP nor PP holds true?

Those all are descriptions of human behavior regarding the gender issues.

Males and females are different.

Different brain structure and weight, different body structure, different biological imperative and social behavior.

So rationally you have to sort this out.

If you do not - you ignore reality.

Cimorene86 · 2020-10-10T10:21:23+00:00

When you perceive men or women as machine like beings with measurable qualities, the whole idea of loving someone loses authenticity and becomes stiffly similar for each person.

Agreed 100%. When you view other people as just another cog in the machine of society, instead of a thinking, feeling human being just like yourself, it leads to apathy towards those not immediately in your group/social circle. It's weird to do this though.

In my own mindset, every person I walk by or interact with is "loved" (like agape love, where you empathetically care about humanity) so of course I'm not going to see them as NPCs like in my videogames. I may not have philia, eros, ludus, or pragma love for them like I do my partners, but they're still people I care about on a basic level.

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2020-10-10T12:13:32+00:00

Ideally, people WILL behave the same with everyone. That's what being authentic is- not changing who you are for the sake of other people. In the end, most people don't change long-term. Some hide who they are well, most hide it poorly, and the best ones are more open. The issue is when someone is, authentically, a monkey branching person.

2020-10-11T00:41:02+00:00

Each human being is a unique consciousness. Utterly unknowable abd entirely incomparible. I'd go so far as to say divine.

However that consciousness is still expressed by the means of a biological brain; a product of evolution and entirely animal in its nature. While our unique existences are indeed something special, they're still driven by this animal hardware.

If we're to make any roads in understanding the underlying motives and patterns of our behavior (I'm not entirely sure this is possible, since we're trying to create epistemological frameworks to cover something that wasn't designed with such in mind) we have to look at it from a strictly mechanistic standpoint, since qualia is entirely inaccessible.

I think the key is to not slip entirely into cynicism, despair and suspicion.

jdobrila · 2020-10-11T04:19:01+00:00

Are all these scientists who pump out dozens of studies that regularly confirm the existence of hypergamy and sexual market value also "rationalizing"?

If you're afraid that your own personal biases are getting in the way of how you perceive reality, then... stop relying them. All the information you want in almost completey unbiased form is out there, you just have to look.

Workaholiconew · 2020-10-12T00:27:18+00:00

Lol, on the opposite, many of the concepts such as the modern hypergamy, dating culture, sexual market are driven by instincts. Their animal programming. Nothing to do with rationality.

Many women choose to go for another man without any rational reason. It is 100% instinct.

Love was never authentical, it is just a manifestation of natural forces. Instincts.

We are equal, because we are all humans. We are all the same species with the same set of instinct. If the market was really rational, people would on the opposite use all kinds of way to acquire the same result. Fill all niches. but we don't showing that the problem of todays market, is just lack of rationalization.

Title	Rationalisation of love and dating culture
Author	erased_existance
Upvotes	22
Comments	84
Date	October 10, 2020 9:06 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/j8hd9k/rationalisation_of_love_and_dating_culture/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/rationalisation-of-love-and-dating-culture.309044 https://theredarchive.com/post/309044

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