Before and after: How things have changed since I've lost weight

AceBenedict23 · 2016-10-25T09:11:28+00:00

Good work bro.

Keep grinding away at it. You've come a long way, but you still got a long way to go. Stay with it

HeinousFu_kery · 2016-10-25T15:16:32+00:00

I've done this - lost 90 pounds over a year when I was in college. Here's a couple of things you might not expect:

Don't get cynical. Yes, people and particularly women will treat you differently, flirt with you and the like when they wouldn't like the "real you" or a less cosmetically conforming person. That's how it works and being bitter about it won't help anyone. This applies to other things; you'll likely find it easier to get a job, easier to get seated in a restaurant etc. etc. Just enjoy it.
Be careful what you wish for and don't get trapped. Now that women find you attractive, you're going to have to negotiate "relationships" (from hookups to full on real-deal things) and all the crap that goes with it. This is sort of like taking someone who's never driven a car and dropping them into the cockpit of an F-22 in mid flight. Lots of displays, controls, a really heavy helmet and things coming at you at Mach 2 while you're being targeted for real. Take it easy on the stick. Expect to make mistakes - just be sure that they're not permanent - and learn from them. Remember, you're at the controls - you don't have to defer to people who are thoughtless, selfish, superficial, or trying to take advantage of you.
Be humane. That ugly girl? She's fighting her own battles - you don't have to go out with her, but don't just write her off as a "2/10" with nothing to say that could interest you, either. That porky dude in the gym who doesn't get any leaner? Same thing. Might be the best friend you ever had. You've just escaped the cosmetic judgement of society and they're still under that weight.

You've had a lifetime of shallow people not looking beneath your surface - you can be the better man.

Edwoodz · 2016-10-25T11:48:50+00:00

"Life is lived forwards, but understood backwards." You've taken a solid step forward my friend, take a glance back every once in while to learn of your previous mistakes, and learn from them well. I'm not going to lie to you and say you'll be pulling hb10's in no time. Keep working on yourself and others will follow.

twofly7739 · 2016-10-25T09:09:08+00:00

Congrats on your weight loss. No doubt you're also exuding more confidence in your interactions, too. It will only get better, TRP shows that getting below 20% body fat is the key to female physical attraction and getting to 15% the ultimate goal.

Having saving that, are you lifting heavy weights? Otherwise you will just lose muscle and go into a yo-yo situation where you are actually ruining your at-rest metabolism and will regain it all. Lift weights and control diet to lose weight, and continue to lift weights to keep the weight off! Good luck.

ThatHoeOverDere · 2016-10-25T12:44:19+00:00

Good job on taking charge of your life man, I wish you the best on your journey. In college you are still young, so my advice would be focus on yourself, your hobbies, interests and your goals.

Remember, they're just women. They're not worth going out of your way for. YOU are the prize, not them.

night_rider1991 · 2016-10-25T13:29:32+00:00

Congrats OP. Keep up the excellent fuckin' job.

I absolutely agree with your observations that shedding the excess poundage changes the way others interact with you. Last year I was 168lbs standing at 5'5 (fat); I trained and dieted hard and managed to get down to 119lbs (I was swimming in size 28x30 jeans bruh) without loosing all my muscle.

Right now I am comfortably at 144/145 lbs after filling out in the muscle department. Just about 15-16% bf and....

Girls fucking love me. I mean I was a dick when I was fat, even more so at 119....but now? You can't even imagine the shit I get away with. You'll know what I mean in time.

I'm proud of you man.

p.s. edit your post and delete that shit about "in no way being alpha." You're wrong. Didn't like how people saw you at 250? Fuck it, you changed yourself with hard work to 205, AND STILL GOING. That my friend, is pretty damn awesome.

nixon007 · 2016-10-25T14:55:36+00:00

Hey guys, this may sound sound noobish, but bare with me. two years ago I was 235 lbs, home domesticated beta. Then I broke out of the relationship and went on 15 egga day diet until I was 175 lean. Man I fucked so many girls. Then the weight slowly came back, then it sped up. Now I am 245 lbs. and now when I approach a young girl to talk, they say things like "you've got to be kidding me"

I hate to admit guys but I don't know how to cut calories without going into a crash diet. Ive been trying to be sensible with my diet now but the scale, nor the mirror are showing signs. I am lifting heavy and doing boxing for cardio. I eat 2000 cals now.

mehdreamer · 2016-10-25T10:43:30+00:00

You're probaly now around 20% BF.. If you want to see even more spectacular changes, get to 15% BF + muscle(the ideal for you is to reach 77 - 80 kg with good muscle definition)

_LoneWolf37 · 2016-10-25T13:40:31+00:00

I'm 15 and I'm going through the same shut you described (opposite of what you said happened, this is pre exercise, because I didn't join any gym yet), people are not interested in talking with me, randoms avoid asking me questions and ask the guy next to me instead, family members do not have that much respect for me but they love me (moms side, I don't really care about my father's side), and sometimes I get picked on/ "bullied" about my big chest in the locker rooms (We have Gym classes but I don't really do anything, because I'm not good at the sports the other guys play so I'm always placed on reserve).

So, how'd you lose weight? I'd like to know, I've got 2 years left in High School (I'm grade 10), do you think I can lose weight quickly at my age? I am 179-181cm tall (I don't exactly remember) and I'm 68Kgs, I was told I should be 75Kgs (muscle mass not fat mass) by my athletic elder brother.

I'd appreciate to know how you did it and how long it took (as I won't be slacking off if you told me 5 years for instance or something, what matters for me is if you can see results every 6 months for example).

Thanks :-)

MattyAnon · 2016-10-25T13:55:22+00:00

Here is a few things I have noticed since losing weight

Good work OP - your observations are correct, and you're right to be inspired and motivated by the feedback. At 205 and 6 foot you're probably not fat, measure your body fat %. Height and weight and BMI no longer relate directly to BF because it depends so much on your musculature now. So measure your BF (skin calipers) as well as your weight.

Make sure you lift like a beast, but aim to lose the weight rather than build muscles. Most women value slim and trim over muscular, but attractive girls are turned off by fat. Look at the most attractive male actors - they're generally slimmer than most men think is most attractive.

facetothedawn · 2016-10-25T15:33:07+00:00

I had the same experience but it seems (since I don't know YOUR exact experience) to feel a bit more drastic for me mostly because I lost 110lbs. It's a very dramatic difference. A type of woman who was literally disgusted by me a few years ago is now the type to approach me. It's still strange even after settling into my new low weight for a few months now. I was a bit mean about it at first to be honest, like - oh, now you want to talk to me? Go eff yourself. Now I'm entirely level head about it, but my choices in women are still more so personality based then physical, I just have a bigger pool to pull from.

"...now I'm gettin real big and didn't invite you to dinner. You wasn't there when I put it in the oven, so when it's time to break bread cousin don't ask me for nothin." - Blueprint.

TL;DR: Yes it's positive but use your new "powers" wisely. Always invest in what's good for you and not in what other people will see of you. Over time both those ideas will come together.

fogsurrounds · 2016-10-25T16:14:29+00:00

I can verify, 5'10" down to 220 from 319 and people absolutely treat me different. Looking forward to getting down under 200 next :)

VasiliyZaitzev · 2016-10-25T13:26:43+00:00

Keep pounding, dude.

Man199 · 2016-10-25T14:41:09+00:00

What I found out that low body fat is really the winner for looks. I was like 250 lbs, but 4 inches taller than you. Now I got to like 170 lbs and got to low body fat ( thx cardio and keto ) and damn attention has skyrocketed. Girls smile more and are a lot more talkative. I really need low body for my face to show nice features. So, get to low bf%, get a nice haircut and put on some nice clothes and you are good to go.

vagbutters · 2016-10-25T16:27:28+00:00

This literally reads the same as when I lost weight years ago. Good on you bro, and as someone who has walked down the same path, enjoy what is to come when you hit your ideal BF% with a good amount of muscle mass. Women eyefuck you almost nonstop, and most girls flirt with you in one way or another.

teeelo · 2016-10-25T18:40:08+00:00

You fucking rock man! Keep it up!

Flexing your abs in front of the mirror NEVER gets old.

Y'know what's funny? The Fat acceptance movement does literally the opposite of what you've done, and they are miserable as shit. WEIRD.

bonus fact: they have also convinced themselves that it is easier to change the way society feels about them, than actually losing weight.

Seriously.

tetsuya80 · 2016-10-26T02:17:32+00:00

Can confirm. Life is completely different when you're just 5kg overweight vs when you're 40kg overweight.

Imagine what it's like when you're athletic with 12% BF

A lot of social and personal issues (e.g. depression) people have in North America can easily be attributed to being fat.

You're not attractive? Probably only because you're fat.

No one talks to you? Probably only because you're fat.

TheRedStoic · 2016-10-26T12:13:47+00:00

Hey bro, genuinely proud of you.

Don't allow yourself to get butthurt as you approach that 18 to 15 percent body fat mark, there will be a massive swing in attention and people's view of you when you drop below that 15 line too. It often makes transformed guys very bitter and vindictive, but don't let it effect you that way.

It's simply how people work, instead feel vindicated in knowing you have fully mastered another fact of reality.

TheLaughingRhino · 2016-10-25T13:55:45+00:00

I've always felt treated like garbage (sometimes rightfully so)

I met a woman who was one of those Before/After picture examples. She was not a younger woman, so the way she was marketed ( I think they paid her a little, the advertisement) was meant to appeal to an older crowd. This wasn't a situation where she or I were trying to hit on each other, we just had a normal conversation by chance like two regular adults.

She said something that really hit me, I mean she dropped something like 200 pounds over a period of like 4 years, she said that when you shed weight, what no one talks about is, you are also shedding, from an emotional standpoint, a lot of the self hate, shame, resentment, ego, things from your childhood, anger, etc, and it comes in waves, sometimes its overwhelming. She said one of the worst things about being heavy was that people would "look right through her" as if she wasn't there, when she had to interact with people. She also said she'd lie awake at night, terrified, and sometimes cried, fearing she'd go back to her bigger size.

One advantage of being a guy, over a girl, in this kind of situation is that, while body image issues impact everyone, it is probably much more pronounced for women. They valued and judged a bit more harshly and their youth and fitness, and the pressure magnifies.

On my own journey, something I found for myself is the idea of existing in someone elses comfortable frame and not yours. If someone knew you before when you were heavy, and either did not treat you well or treated you with judgement, it's not them "treating you better" It's simply you becoming more acceptable in their eyes under their standards of how you should live. No one, I mean NO ONE, deserves to be treated like garbage because they don't fit some social ideal of how one "should look" If someone wants to treat someone like garbage because they had bad character, that's one thing. If you are someone who backstabs your "friends", that has nothing to do with how you look, it just means you are douchebag. But just on appearance, no one should feel they have the right to look down on you because you don't match their standards. They have the right to walk away from you, not interact with you, but not treat you poorly. I think that distinction is huge in this kind of journey.

The people who treated you "better" now, knowing the previous physical version of you, I'm not saying go and punch them in the face. I am saying those are the kind of people, in the back of your head, to remember that, if you re looking for a friend or a lover, they'll always hold their view of what's acceptable over what is civil.

Then there are people who never knew the previous you. Those people had no control over not meeting you before. You don't know how they would have treated you when you were heavier. In those cases , I think one has to take a case by case basis to see what kind of character they have.

I take note of people, when I was heavier, who took the time, mostly at the gym, to let me know quickly that they see I was working hard, and they wished me the best and to encourage me to keep plugging away. I saw all those interactions as gifts, we all need external support at times, to help push ourselves along.

Shedding the weight, you might find yourself, at times, having those emotional "discharges" come out, my take is to let them run their course, don't hold onto them too long, but accept that you didn't get heavy just from eating too much, you also likely got heavier as a manifestation of how you felt about yourself.

There are those who will openly define you by how you look.

If you don't like that methodology ( and most don't), then always remember to be the guy yourself, who encourages others, who lifts people up, who does not judge whenever possible. You can't change the world, you can change if you choose to participate in the things you see in the world that just don't like and that you didn't like being applied to you.

To me, sustained fitness, from an emotional standpoint, comes from a lifestyle change where the drive is from being emotionally healthy and having good self esteem because you can accept yourself at that given time and place. If you'll only feel complete once you lose the next 20 pounds, then you aren't doing it for you, you are doing it for everyone else to validate you. Be good to you right now, whatever your shape or weight, to me, it's the only way, the only chance to be fit for the best reason - which is discovering the best version of you possible, for you, and not for anyone else.

I'm not here trying to push fat acceptance on anyone, I just think the safest road to self improvement is for anyone to let go of defining themselves by how they look, the thing they have, the status they acquire.

Most people don't value you more. Most people, nearly all, don't give a shit about you, except how you make them feel about themselves. Judge yourself on being a "gross monster' by how you treat people who can do nothing for you, how you react when times are the hardest and whether you rise or fall, on how you stand by your word and integrity, on how you choose when faced with doing what you think is right and doing what you know will end up costing you personally for doing what you think is right, even if the crowd goes the other way.

I want to encourage you the way I wished others would encourage me, and when I was fortunate, that a few did encourage me. I'm proud of you man. Even if you never bang a girl in your entire life, and if no one ever looked at you again, be proud of yourself right here and right now. I wish for you not just fitness, but finding a good balance for your own emotional health on this journey.

Thinking of yourself as a "fat loser" , even in the past, holds yourself hostage in someone elses frame. I encourage you to simply define yourself within your own.

Good luck.

LaRedPill · 2016-10-25T13:37:11+00:00

This is something i realized that guys who did sports, or had great genetics or lifted had since their teens.

I know a couple of those guys and they are all high energy types, usually pretty positive about themselves and the world around them.

Since noticing all these changes of attitude around myself (another one, guys will argue stupid detail less with you, specially at work) i developed my own theory, they probably have lived a life like this all their life, with less roadblocks, and with more people jumping in to help them when they were in need.

So years and years of sports / gym => High energy guy
Great body => better interactions
High energy + positive interactions => more success

worktillyouburk · 2016-10-25T12:51:23+00:00

currently at 240, been lifting for 6 months. cant seem to lose it though ive gotten much stronger.

amekooky · 2016-10-25T13:36:22+00:00

Gains! I've been fat/single with game, or a BP fit guy with a LTR...but never both.. cant wait to a stack TRP/Fit body asap.

prodigy2throw · 2016-10-25T14:05:01+00:00

Good start. The more you work on your look the more you realize how much kindness you've missed out on when you were a fatty. Take advantage of it.

imbeciI · 2016-10-25T15:14:50+00:00

Just out of curiosity, what's your training regime?

Atuli · 2016-10-25T15:43:40+00:00

Awsome work man. This effect gets amplified the fitter you get and it feels great.

Get addicted to this feeling

magnificentshambles · 2016-10-25T15:59:53+00:00

I applaud your courage, sir. This is good inspiration for us all, because we all have the capacity to either be supermen, or let ourselves slide completely the other way.

GOATmar · 2016-10-25T16:20:50+00:00

Trust me my brother I know what you mean.

Ever since I first saw Fedor Emelianenko dominate in around 2009 (right after UFC 100), I wanted his frame. He was 6 feet, I used to be 6 feet.

He was ridiculously strong (400lbs bench press), and I wanted to be strong like that too.

He weighed around 230lbs to 240lbs at like 20% body fat, maybe more, and I wanted to get as big by any means necessary.

So I started eating. Red meat and potatoes, daily, with pasta and a bunch of eggs. All drenched in olive oil. And of course I did strength training too.

Fast-forward to early 2016 and I found myself weighing around a frail, skinny-fat 230lbs at 6'1" or 6'2". Had some solid thighs from squats and still somehow my abs showed as well, but man was it a sad look. At least Fedor has the massive arms & chest to go with his gut - I didn't have any of that to go with mine haha.

So I said fuck it I'm going full on LeanGains and decided I wanted big arms & chest, with a small 6-packed waist, because I felt it would be much better for my health, my jawline, my penis size and my confidence.

So I came up with goals for myself and started fasting daily and started doing the Anabolic Diet. I went from 230lbs in May, to 177.8lbs this morning.

My arms have remained the same. My chest have remain the same. But my belly melted the fuck off and I love the V shape I've gained.

I've stuck with the strength training and have cut all carbs from my diet 5 days of the week. 2 days (weekend) I carb-load to get ready for the next 5 days of 0 carbs.

My goals were simple: Based on the wrists (mine is 7"), the Golden Rule for the perfect male body is the following:

Neck should be wrist size (7") by 2.43" = 17"

Chest should be wrist size (7") by 6.57 = 46"

Biceps should be: 7" x 2.43 = 17"

Forearms: 7" x 1.86 = 13.5"

Waist should be: 7" x 4.57 = 32"

Hips should be: 7" x 5.57 = 39"

Thigh: 7" x 3.43 =** 24"**

Calves: 7" x 2.29 = 16"

Ideally, 7% or 8% Body Fat.

My current measurements:

My neck is currently 16"

Bicep 15.5"

forearms 12.5"

Waist: 32" from 38"

Hips 39.5" from 44" (!!!)

Chest around 43"

Thighs somehow still 26"

And calves around 14"

Currently at 11.5% body fat.

I've noticed my jawline improved, and people are more approachable as well.

I still have a LONG way to go. If I continue eating every day like I have, and keep lifting heavy, I will reach all my goals within 6 to 8 months of eating, training and sleeping perfectly. Getting my arms naturally from 15" to 17" is going to be the most difficult because of how long and lanky my arms are. I hate it. BUT, I am going to put in the work by any means necessary to attain aesthetic perfection.

I have the resources. Motivation. The goals. There are no excuses.

Every single male in here should be adhering to these golden ratios of universal male physical attractiveness just like every woman should be adhering to theirs (waist-hip ratio of 0.68, BMI of 18 to 20). If only this stuff was taught in schools early on....

BeijingTurkey · 2016-10-25T16:27:12+00:00

Congratulations man. Keep up the good work.

Snailman80 · 2016-10-25T16:43:20+00:00

You are doing well, keep on mastering your life!

The__Tren__Train · 2016-10-25T17:39:18+00:00

I'm with u bro, just started my diet last night

5'9, 240lbs. We will see what's left when all is said and done

TACTICALBLONDEBIMBO · 2016-10-25T17:59:36+00:00

IM 5'9 and trying to get down to about 140 bro, Im about 160. Maybe 155 right now bro. Keep going, and you will get there. However fuck theses hos, the only reason I want to get down to that weight, is so will have less strain on my back, and also because when hopefully the time comes I will be able to ball out on certain things career related.

I see a lot of people on here, are doing this strictly for these bitches. Which is ok, and completely understandable. Most of these hos are not worth the time and effort they want you to put in to fuck/give you head or whatever. A few of them are truly bad bitches, who do deserve effort.

the_one_man_taliban · 2016-10-25T19:33:49+00:00

I noticed this immediately when I began lifting. I was, at the time, still a fat ass, but even a little muscle definition goes a long way, especially if you're over 6 feet tall(I'm 6'2").

A little muscle tone and an inch off my waist and all of a sudden it was like night and day when it came to women over a three month period.

Obviously keep up the good work OP!

Thebilboestbaggins · 2016-10-25T20:00:50+00:00

Fat people do not understand how much their weight is hindering them in this game we call life. Good job man, and life will only get better. You were a fat loser, you were at the bottom of the totem pole. Not any more. Keep at it and don't slow down for anyone.

And I would disagree about you not being alpha. I guess I differ from most people on this sub where I would say being alpha is more of a path than a status. Losing 45 pounds is alpha as fuck. Welcome to the alpha club.

Akela_hk · 2016-10-25T21:39:21+00:00

205 and 6ft? Maintain that weight and get lifting. Tim Kennedy is 5'11 and 185, and he's a beast. You're only 20lb off of that!

CrashXXL · 2016-10-25T23:36:10+00:00

I went from 265 to 210 when I was in college and started hooking up with waaaay more chicks. I'm back up to 275 again tho :(

ballietbran · 2016-10-26T01:42:32+00:00

Hey bro, I can relate quite a bit. I'm 6 feet tall too and was 250lbs at my max and that was when I was shorter and younger. It's weird how when you lose the weight or actually look good, people just treat you differently than when you were fat.

luiee · 2016-10-26T03:30:00+00:00

Keep it up and keep it off!

smallnakk · 2016-11-16T12:36:18+00:00

Keep it up man, it just keeps getting better and better

mill58 · 2016-11-16T21:05:12+00:00

I'm 6 ft and 208 lbs and still have a little beer belly... I fucking hate it but I went from 250 lbs down to 208 lbs just in 8 months by just walking to my job and back to my home, lifting and running 30 minutes every single day possible (some times I can't because of the bad weather).

Not sure how long until the beer belly is completely gone but I will keep my discipline...

Any advice? my diet is basically are eggs, brown rice, chicken/fish, broccoli and mushrooms.

dicers · 2016-10-25T19:58:10+00:00

Your happiness is showing, your confidence is showing. That is what people see and attracts. Keep on this journey, feel good about yourself and be awesome!

nonthaki · 2016-10-25T08:56:59+00:00

I really honestly feel like people in the world value me more

You are now going to improve yourself for validation & that is not a surefire winning&happiness giving tactic .

SomeGuyNY · 2016-10-25T17:51:09+00:00

I don't think people being friendly has anything to do with you not being fat unless you were the always sweating with a flush in your face or an angry fat guy.

There are plenty of overweight (not severely obese though) guys that are super social that everybody likes. While they don't make girls soaking wet they tend to go from LTR to LTR.

Women tend to be a lot more grossed out by skinny guys.

Don't forget to lift and I hope you won't end up with excess skin.

Title	Before and after: How things have changed since I've lost weight
Author	DowntownRuffs
Upvotes	305
Comments	114
Date	October 25, 2016 8:37 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/599zuw/before_and_after_how_things_have_changed_since/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/before-and-after-how-things-have-changed-since-ive.63939 https://theredarchive.com/post/63939

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