Mid 20s. Don't give a shit about much

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June 14, 2020
112 upvotes

I really only care about making money, setting my career up nicely, and fishing. Anyone else in a similar boat? I'm really not into pussy anymore. Or making friends. Or partying. Just doesn't even feel worth it to live in that scene anymore, or put in the effort to game chicks. I can't figure out if it's nirvanna or I'm making excuses. I've gotten enough pussy to know I can whenever circumstances are right. I spent my early 20s partying and travelling. I just don't even want to anymore. I cut out some deadweight friends. I just want to make money, lift, and chill. Anyone feel me?


Post Information
Title Mid 20s. Don't give a shit about much
Author ThatOneDrunkUncle
Upvotes 112
Comments 72
Date 14 June 2020 03:47 AM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/673278
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/h8mmx2/mid_20s_dont_give_a_shit_about_much/
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Comments

[–]Ta9afire34 points35 points  (3 children) | Copy

Same here, 27yo. I'm focusing on my career to make more money. People are shocked when they see i spend weekends alone or stuff like that. They don't understand that i have more interesting/benefical shit to do than going out to a party listening to music i don't like.

Only social interactions that i force myself to are with girls because i have sexual needs. I need to be able to buy an appartment in my 30s, have a stable situation, that's all what interests me now. People don't get it. Seems like all my friends aren't as motivated as me.

[–]TheDero9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

Keep grinding brother

[–]fartt1232 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

only girls could be dangerous too if you can't have multiples.

[–]Ta9afire2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I make sure i have multiples to not Oneitis

[–]embar599 points100 points  (6 children) | Copy

You'll need to eventually incorporate girls and friends or else live a life of regret and pointless productivity; I say this as a 34 year old. A temporary focus period is okay but don't do this for decades

[–]ValorElite23 points24 points  (2 children) | Copy

Agreed. Every man goes through these cycles of being solo but everyone needs friends and companionship eventually.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]axiscontra-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Associates* Friends are you, yourself, and gym. Just start talking to people. you have something in common with everyone find it.

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]axiscontra0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

make this its own post.

[–]condeslime0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ok thanks

[–]DialecticContrarian23 points24 points  (5 children) | Copy

I'm on my last string in dating. Talking to one last woman on catholic match. Depending on how that goes, ima pretty much just put everything into career family and friends

[–]ThatOneDrunkUncle[S] 17 points18 points  (4 children) | Copy

Yeah man I really feel that. If I meet someone I click with who wants to tag along, great. But I'll never simp over a girl, chase, or even really put much more effort into women. I always thought MGTOW was for guys who can't get women, but it just doesn't feel worth the BS anymore. Good for you and good luck.

[–]DialecticContrarian7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's not even that, I'm like getting so much excitement and purpose from this new chapter in my life that it's like such a different world. I just dont see the lifestyles, or at least the version in my head, being complimentary.

Unless a girl is hustling it's like idk, it just seems so rediculous. I really dont know how to describe it. I always wanted to be a father and a husband but now it's like, I genuinely don't care and kind of feel like I dont want those things. I just want to help and inspire people in my career

[–]butthurtmoderators5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I feel you man. Women these days are so poorly behaved it’s maddening and sickening

[–]boltjamison1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Most MGTOW are guys who had too much women and realized the juice just isn't worth the squeeze.

Most people don't understand MGTOW. We don't hate women. We understand their nature and choose to interact with them as we choose to.

Its men going THEIR OWN WAY. So if u still want to date etc, thats fine. Some MGTOW still do, Including myself. The common idea most MGTOW agree upon tho is no marriage and no cohabitation.

I recommend checking out better bachelor and coach Greg Adams on YouTube for a better and more neutral approach to red pill / MGTOW. Then decide if its for u.

All I can say is that it was the best decision I have made.

Happiness comes from within. Do not listen to the other people on this thread. You do not NEED many friends or girls in ur life to be happy. They are there to enhance ur already awesome life. A compliment to ur life if u will and if they don't fit YOUR program, then they don't belong in your life.

U are young. Focus on yourself. Continue to build the best version of yourself. U will figure this all out on ur own. Stop by the MGTOW sub and read some of the knowledge other men share.

Take care and good luck.

[–]beeguy7270 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You can do all the right things and they still won’t want to be with you until they’re done with their “hoe phase.”

[–]axiscontra33 points34 points  (7 children) | Copy

Mainly what I do too. Im setting myself up for a future where I have even more power than what I do now. What you have is called focus. You're not going to waste your time dealing with these shitty women now, you're going to keep increasing and increasing your SMV so you can get higher status women that can actually be interesting enough to bed them. You're biding your time. Remember that money is not a thing, power is. Money does not equal power.

[–]_DeezNuts714_6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

Money definitely equals power lol

[–]Poopybuttholeman14 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

They are related.

In some circumstances, I’d rather have 20 weaponised drones than 10 billion dollars, in other circumstances, I’d rather have the money.

Money is a tool, and a very effective one, but it is not tantamount to power.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorFieldLine1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Let’s be precise.

Power is the ability to maneuver. It is the means to pivot, to make a change to your life with no external oversight.

As you gain more power, your sphere of influence expands, allowing you to control others, but even this is just an extension to the fundamental idea of power: the ability to shape your own destiny.

[–]Noodlesoupe20 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

isolating yourself isn’t increasing your smv. I’d say building connections and partying and having fun experiences is more of an smv booster than making money

[–]omega053 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

maybe he's not worried about his smv and just wants to do things that pleases him

[–]Noodlesoupe21 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’m replying to the comment above me not the post

[–]axiscontra0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I agree. Although some of us are introverts, and one of my favorite quotes:

The point is, not to resist the flow. You go up when you're supposed to go up and down when you're supposed to go down. When you're supposed to go up, find the highest tower and climb to the top. When you're supposed to go down, find the deepest well and go down to the bottom. When there's no flow, stay still. If you resist the flow, everything dries up. If everything dries up, the world is darkness.

I can get achieve, and make deep longing and lasting connections with people in very little time something that extroverts have trouble doing. (I'm also good at network hopping my closest friends close friends are also my friends by association. it just works that way for me) I sit at the same seats of extroverts but seem to do little work than they have to do. Isolation is not the goal, internal focus, introspection, and external goal setting are. Eliminate distractions, focus on the end goal whatever that may be.

In terms of SMV increasing this way, you are focusing on your goals and confidence. You can still be abundant and not deal with women. Abundance is a mentality first and foremost. The fact that they are available is key. I have women available to me if I pleased. All I have to do is put in the tiniest of effort and show an interest. I call them low velocity plates. Moral of the story theirs different ways to achieve the same goal. Recognize there are different people than you.

[–]cracksniffer6666 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Society tries to make you feel bad about it, which is why you're questioning yourself. Fuck it homie. Rock out. Do you.

[–]throwitdownman3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I did the same. I thought my SMV would plummet due to having a singular focus on making money. Turns out it increased.

Life sucks. It rewards selfish behaviour. The more you enhance yourself, the more you get out of life. The Red Pill applies here - be supplicating? Never laid. Be selfish, and focus on yourself? SMV raise. Friends miss you more, people look up to you, friendzoned girls no longer friendzone you, acquaintances are nicer to you (perhaps out of fear or intimidation), etc.

[–]rplad4204 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy

This is the best way to fuck up your life since you will never be happy and keep chasing money.

I am in the same situation as yours, but after reading countless books and watching people chase money I have realised its pointless.

Earn money, alot of money- enough so that you dont have to work after 30/35, but dont chase it.

Dont give a fuck about money. Enjoy the journey, work hard earn alot party.

20-30 is prime time and you wont be able to do the same fun activities in your 30's and 40's,so have tons of fun and makes tons of cash.

Infact use this time to make money and when lockdown ends party

[–]Ta9afire-1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy

Yeah but some people are just not interested in "party".

[–]rplad4200 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Then force yourself to be interested.

Otherwise your life will suck. It will be a boring, endless chase of a piece of paper that means nothing.

Life is supposed to be fun. Money is supposed to make it easier to have fun. Use it to have fun, not to worship.

[–]throwawayandtossout2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm not into the "party" and my life doesn't suck. I'd much rather go out into the wilderness and nature and see beauty in solitude than be around a bunch of sweaty people crammed into a bar/club getting drunk and chasing "fun". But that's just me, and to each his own.

Point is, you don't have to be into the party scene in order to enjoy life. I'd argue the majority of those people are chasing something and trying to fill some void that partying will never fill, but I could be wrong there.

[–]sir_shitfuck-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

What are these people partying about? Pleasures and sensations come and go.

[–]rplad4200 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What I mean is if hes too focused on money he wont be able to enjoy life.

Money should make his life more enjoyable not tiring.

[–]CareIsMight2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I can relate. One of my parents just died and I'm in the same boat. Of course, we need friendships. Surround yourself with friends and family who want the best for you. Still go to party's for social gatherings and whatnot, don't completely cut yourself off, for example one of my good friends is stuck in the mud at the moment with no employment, this and that, he isn't completely where he wants to be but he is the person I have the most fun with and so it's good to have that support system. Your priorities sound like they're centred around you and your own development so that's really positive. I don't give a shit about much apart from my work, hobbies, exercise routine, other wealth accumulating side hustles and family are in good order. That's all you need. Anything else is fluff and if you're lucky to have the time and money to do luxurious things then you can.

[–]athrowaway-90012 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do what you want to do.

Don't measure yourself to the metric of society's expectations of what is deemed as a "good" life. That is subjective; only you can determine what makes you happy and what you derive satisfaction from.

If you are comfortable in your own skin and don't feel the need to necessitate about any type of relationship or material need, it is a good sign. If you do fine any genuine people, I do say hold on to them as that is a commodity in itself; in a world that is becoming more alien and more artificial, it is best to befriend such people.

[–]PolesWithGoals1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You’re on the right path

[–]Ta9afire1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

27yo, i too decided today to spend less time chasing girls and trying to find plates, after another failed date (the girl want me to orbitate weeks before i fuck... Cause she probably thinks she's a princess)

It's just too much time lost on logistics, to get a no at the end of the day. It's probably labeled as "sad", but masturbation calms me down and allows me to focus on productive stuff, rather than chasing women and thinking about pussy to the point i can't think. So i also decided to break that nofap BS. It definitely helped with my erections, but after 20 days or so it just becomes unbearable to think about anything besides ass and pussy. I will stick to 2 healthy faps a week, without porn preferably.

Instead of spending my time in my twenties chasing girls, dating them and all the time and money loss that comes with it, i prefer working hard so i can have enough money in my 30s to not even need to chase girls or think about how to get them. Nice car, big crib, ripped body, i wouldn't even need to talk.

[–]cphpc2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

You sound desperate for attention. Like you’re at the top and everything is downhill from here. Good luck man. Just keep not giving a fuck.

[–]NOnutFOREVA5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

I'm confused can you elaborate

[–]Noodlesoupe20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

he made this mental masturbatory post lol

[–]drunkPKMNtrainer-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

OP doesn't give a fuck so we should all clap for him

[–]ThatOneDrunkUncle[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Im just asking if this is normal for my age lol

[–]drunkPKMNtrainer0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ha. Yea it is. I think so. Sometimes you want to start a new chapter and that's cool.

[–]curvedbymykind0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Same. At what point do you think you'll stop trying to focus on money/career and go back to women again?

[–]Ta9afire0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Not OP, but i'd say when i'll have my own house and a secured career. I can't lose time and money with dumb people doing dumb activities. Which is generally what happens when you're on LTR by the way. Girls generally don't have that anticipatory vision men have, they don't fucking care about saving money for tough situations, or for buying a house, or for retirement. They know they'll just marry a beta and it'll solve all their problems.

While if you're a man, if you don't work for yourself in your twenties you're pretty much fucked.

Why stress yourself and lose time over women, they don't fucking care about you right now at the stage where you're at. I mean unless you want to get into a relationship, but now we're talking blue pill shit.

What i'm stating s in a red pill mindset, meaning that you want to be stable and be able to fuck tons of beautiful girls. That is not going to happen unless you grind cleverly in your twenties.

[–]curvedbymykind1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fax my dude

[–]mrbill12340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Welcome to adulthood.

[–]Morjumba10 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

27 here and I am in the same exact boat. I don't drink or use drugs, party or anything like that. I do use anabolics, but I am focused on school, my lifts, I have a small group of friends I keep in touch with and I'm close with my family. I do have a good gf though, if you plan on starting a family you'll need one of those.

[–]cockkksucker0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Do what makes u happy bro. That’s what life is, fuck what anybody else thinks.

[–]blacwidonsfw0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Late 20s and similar situation though I occasionally still enjoy going out but mostly more to hang out with my friends.

After being in a city for 10 years I’m buying a house in the woods and going to do that thing and focus on my projects to make money. Maybe in 5 years I’ll change my mind and want to party again who knows

[–]mr_Tobbor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How do you jerk? Masturbate? Anything accessory?

[–]Appex1-1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy

Early-20's here. I feel the same way. And even though I've gotten laid 7 times, 12 blowjobs, and like 15 handjobs in my life, I feel like it's enough. I thought that pussy would make me feel complete until I realized holes can't be filled with holes.

I've naturally let go of girls completely as it brought more misery into my life than pleasure. While most would say that it's great, that now I can focus on building a career and power, I see the world much differently.

Now I try to let go of everything. I try to read more novels by great writers. Not these bullshit self-improvement books, they made me sick. I learn more from a book by Dostoyevski than I learn from 10 modern personal development books.

I've also at a point in life where I have no friends. Not a single one would I call my friend, and while I grieved much about being left alone. I've realized that now I'm free to do anything I want.

What I try to let go of most is my mere existence, my ego. What I for sure know is that in 2 years I will see life much differently than I do now and whatever I expect will always turn out differently.

[–]1DonaldBaelish13 points14 points  (3 children) | Copy

Nobody here will tell you that what you’re doing / have done is great, mate.

You’ve gotten laid 7 times. You count your handjobs. You have no friends. People only bring misery into your life. You’ve let go of any personal relationships. You’re trying to fill a void.

You sound borderline depressed and nihilistic.

Seek help, son.

[–]CareIsMight0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I think you misunderstood what he said.

He is happy where he is at despite not being able or not wanting to call anyone his friend. Many people who are successful and content with themselves are at this point where they don't want to be weighed down by others. This doesn't mean he won't make friends later or find a good woman later who won't bring him misery. He doesn't want to be tied down by others and that's a type of freedom. Maybe he will feel like he needs more support and company later but the idea of us having to chase woman he is content with not doing that anymore and living on his terms until his circumstances change. Of course it's not good to let go of all personal relationships but we all have to go monk mode at least once in our lives and listen to what we want deep inside ourselves.

[–]1DonaldBaelish3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I didn’t. He’s lying. He’s not happy.

[–]Noodlesoupe20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Isolating yourself isn’t the way to do that tho. You can improve yourself without being a total hermit

[–]athrowaway-90010 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I agree with the previous poster that mentioned you are depressed.

I believe you tried to use women as a metric for your success in life and ideals that you projected onto your relationships, until either you realized that she isn't the one or she picks up on that type of energy coming from you.

The fact that you are counting the volume of sex you've had speaks enough for itself.

Self-help books are either there to try and sell something to you or to actually help. The thing is though that self-help books are supposed to help guide you on the right direction. If you are hoping the book will fix all your problems and fulfill your needs, you are sadly mistaken. Instead you need to heed the advice and apply it to your life. Otherwise you will be stuck in limbo trying to find out what you can derive happiness from; not realizing that it all starts at one point-- yourself.

First, seek help for your depression. You can start already by meditating and looking into yourself and seeing what is wrong. It could be vague metrics of what you deem an ideal life that everybody should live. It could be you are insecure about something and believe you are unlovable because of it.

The remaining steps will fall into place like a staircase, but it all depends on you to start building the steps. Otherwise you will have never left from the bottom.

[–]Mad at ModsFusionnn0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Read the subtle art of not giving a fuck

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]ThatOneDrunkUncle[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

It has become a chore. My SMV has definitely gone up over the past few years but the amount of girls who just aren't worth the time anymore has turned me off. For a while at least.

It's probably a phase, and I'm not going MGTOW. Just moving more towards passively attracting quality women than wasting effort on flakes and damaged women. I'm more asking if people have had similar experiences around my age. I've never been 25 before lol

[–]Cyo_The_Vile-1 points0 points  (10 children) | Copy

This is about how I've felt coming to terms with not being young anymore.

[–]Besee273 points4 points  (9 children) | Copy

Lol 25 is not young anymore? This whole comment section and post is pathetic

I guess dan bazilerian the 40 year old “gets tired of the life style” too. Lmfao

https://www.instagram.com/p/B_J6AGanrVx/?hl=en

[–]NOnutFOREVA-2 points-1 points  (8 children) | Copy

Is that the life you guys really want in this subreddit though? Surrounded by unlimited ass instead of a nice connection with a single woman?

[–]jonsmif97975 points6 points  (6 children) | Copy

What do you mean by a nice connection? LMAO after all the sidebar, you still think that a woman can love you like you want?

[–]NOnutFOREVA2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

Yes those sidebars help to understand and be aware but shouldn't the ultimate goal be to achieve success, have a wonderful family, have aan awesome job, do something meaningful and explore. Don't get me wrong I would hate if my wife brought me down to failure or was a roadblock but if I really want that life, I'm pretty sure I can find a woman with a common goal and we both can build each other up right? I would try my best to ignore western females although it's gonna be hard as I live in Texas. What do you think? Ofc I mean no harm in asking this and am just curious. I'm new here but have done my fair share of watching videos and reading the forums.

[–]Vouch33r2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Ask knowledgeable Endorsed Contributors, not randoms at askTRP who make stuff up

[–]NOnutFOREVA2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

But the main idea still holds true. The main idea of this subreddit still feels like it's being relationship free but still having friends with benefits and sexual encounters but not pursuing a relationship. I want a relationship and if it makes me weak or blue pilled sure I'll take it but what's the harm in relationship if that's what we seek deep down but act like we don't care...who doesn't wanna be loved? Taken care of? And feel worthy?

[–]Vouch33r2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This subreddit gives you tools. It's not dogmatic, it's not an ideology. You can pursue any goals you want

[–]Besee270 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

If changing diapers and being a beta provider is your thing, then go for it no ones stopping you

[–]NOnutFOREVA0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I would happily change my baby's diaper if my wife is working because 50/50 as all things should bebe in my relationship. Beta provider? Don't tell me you're a grown ass man who uses the word alpha/beta and puts down other men by calling them beta now are you? Support men not put each other down. Help em learn and acknowledge their problems so they can enlighten is from their perspective and we can do the same with them. Women put us down plenty, let's not fall in the same trap of putting down other men like that. Anw I get what you mean though. Marriage does come with it's problems but I was just genuinely asking if most men here want connection but refuse to marriage, aren't you going against something you want?

[–]Noodlesoupe20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

There’s a balance tho. Live a life of hedonism when you’re young and then settle down when you get older (around 30 or so)

[–]fartingaround-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Shut up



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