With online dating, I really recommend waiting a few days before giving a new guy your social media

mightbethrowawayyy · 2020-05-06T21:26:36+00:00

Asking for snap = 🚩

Asking for selfies = 🚩

Pushy = fuck off

Usually when they ask you for more pictures they just want jerk off materials. Don’t send them any. Especially when you’ve never met.

gursky0 · 2020-05-06T22:20:29+00:00

That's a great, low-risk strategy to vet him for boundary-pushing.

Also, if he asks for your snapchat within minutes/hours/days you know for sure he's a LVM fishing for nudes. If he asks for your snapchat but NOT your instagram AND facebook, you know he's a LVM fishing for nudes.

sushimeup · 2020-05-07T00:18:06+00:00

What about guys that follow you asap without you giving it to them orrrr having it anywhere in your profile lmao 🤮

circescircus · 2020-05-07T03:13:37+00:00

*sigh*

Idk how old y'all are, but I'm 32 and can remember a time when OLD wasn't like this. It was awkward, but nowhere near this bad.

First of all, social media is usually (almost always) bad. Unless you're using it for work, keep your shit super private (don't even use real names), only add family and real friends. Don't add any random men either. You have NOTHING to gain by putting yourself out there on social media, by making yourself accessible to every Tom, Dick and Butthead slinging DMs into your inbox.

And giving your Snapchat a few days later, again, what is the point? What HVM is asking women for their Snapchat anyway? You know the guy is looking for nudes, you know he's following a bunch of pickmeishas on Snapchat.

Some random guy that you don't even know is a rapist, pedophile, convict, a psycho or narc, doesn't need any of your social media info. Not a few days later, weeks or even months later. Only add them to your social media after screening them, after you know who they are. Sure, you can justify exchanging social media by saying "I want to see who he is/what he's about" but this is not a guarantee. It's easy to make multiple social media profiles, you can hide things, you can curate it.

My opinion: finding a decent guy on apps is almost impossible. The ones asking for your Snapchat, Instagram etc are not one of the rare gems. Immediately unmatch/block them, get busy swiping and rejecting other dudes, because you'll reject TONS of them before finding a decent guy, if you can find one. I think OLD is best used in a big city for this reason. You'll need a lot of matches to find a few that are't terrible.

The dating culture for young women now makes me so, so sad.

LadyGrimes · 2020-05-06T21:25:56+00:00

good advice!

ros-bos · 2020-05-06T21:34:33+00:00

I personally lie and say I don’t have/use social media if a guy asks, especially before we’ve gone out on a date. I’m not on OLD for friends/followers.

kht777 · 2020-05-07T02:14:05+00:00

Lol jokes on those guys, I don't have a snap chat and my instagram is just pictures of the places I visit or stuff I made. My facebook is for real life friends and family, but I don't post much stuff.

rwilkz · 2020-05-07T14:58:54+00:00

If a man is over 25 and still using snapchat he ain’t worth dating

ny-lady · 2020-05-07T12:57:58+00:00

When I had personal social media back in the day, no man was allowed to have until we were actually dating. I dont know you, you dont get access to my private social media, friends and family are there.

I haven't had any for years now so I dont have to deal with it. Its freeing not to deal with social media baloney.

aaela · 2020-05-06T21:31:29+00:00

Dudes asking for nudes is SO insulting in the sense that their arrogance really makes them believe that they somehow deserve MY nudes? Byeee

gogetawaythrowitaway · 2020-05-06T22:30:43+00:00

When most OLD lads ask for snap, they just want nudes. 100% foolproof in my experience, it has ALWAYS been the case for me. Definitely wait. I don't even use snap anymore cause of getting hounded for nudes.

Now early on I establish - I don't send em. That sends a lot of them heading for the hills - and I'm glad.

A good one is to tell them when they ask for it that you don't have snap, or say you don't send nudes (or even if you don't send them until 'x' amount of time or 'x' amount of dates, anyway its all personal but don't go sending them early to anyone, only a man you really trust. Seriously loads of guys show their friends...)

Personally I just don't send them, if I'm physically dating someone there's no need anyway. They do this as well cause its easy to pressure a lot of insecure girls to send them (i have in the past through being begged to and being put down for saying no - NEVER do this) They know they can manipulate it out of some people, that's their intention.

A guy literally once said he was gonna kill himself and that I was evil for OLD and not sending nudes and that I was a bitch/slut/whatever for 'leading him on'... We literally started talking THAT day. Earlier/ younger me would have probably caved in and 'felt sorry for him' and sent them. No no no I'm so glad I'm starting to level up.

They know exactly what they're doing. Most lads only have snap for recieving nudes anyway lol.

TradcatAlice · 2020-05-08T00:13:10+00:00

Yup. Currently talking to a guy and even though he gave me his instagram I don't plan on giving him my real one for several months.

He can beg all he wants but I have a right to *my* privacy.

Title	With online dating, I really recommend waiting a few days before giving a new guy your social media
Author	Ratataratata22
Upvotes	162
Comments	35
Date	May 6, 2020 9:09 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/gesnmi/with_online_dating_i_really_recommend_waiting_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/with-online-dating-i-really-recommend-waiting-a.676796 https://theredarchive.com/post/676796

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