How does society define a “catcall?”

redditthrowaway1478 · 2020-07-22T19:50:33+00:00

1) If you're not from the US, please define what constitutes as “catcalling” in your country/region 2) If it differs, what is your personal definition...

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[–]GGMcThroway3 points 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Sooooo you're going to downplay the effects of sexual assault and conveniently ignore the context surrounding it. And you're going to dismiss it as dramatics by giving it the most harmless-sounding description you can think of. Because you apparently can't comprehend how much getting sexually assaulted will fuck you up in the the head when it's something you can't physically stop since you'll always be weaker than the person doing it.

I'm not saying groping is equivalent to rape and murder. I'm saying that even with a gun, it's not something you can stop without going to prison. It'll fuck with your head no matter how many guns you're carrying - not as badly as heavier forms of sexual assault, obviously, but it's still assault. You have every reason to believe he'll do it again since no one stopped him the first time. Him escalating it even farther is a very real possibility. And if it does, you better hope you live in a place you can carry since the police aren't going to do jack shit until it's too late.

[–]softhandsam1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

The only things that effect you are those that you allow. If you get traumatized by a guy grabbing your butt you are really milking the situation.

You're literally basically lamenting that it's not okay to shoot someone for grabbing your butt. You're saying I'm downplaying the seriousness because I'm saying it's not even in the same realm, because you see it as comparable.

I've had my butt grabbed and pinched by random women. I somehow came away from it not fucked up. I basically dismissed it.

What is it about women that makes something like that more traumatic than when it happens to men?

You can say it's the fear because men are larger, but then why would it fuck you up if it happened and nothing else came of it?

Shouldn't that be like a phew! Could have been so much worse?

Nope, women dwell and amplify any negative interactions to the point of absurdity.

I think it's because women recognize their main power is pussy power, and if they can't weild it as a weapon, of someone can grab their butt without asking, it takes their power away and it's therfore "traumatizing"

[–]GGMcThroway1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

The only things that effect you are those that you allow.

You wouldn't say "Hey [insert female name here], I know you keep getting groped on the bus and catcalled and followed by strangers and the police won't do anything about it, but the only things that effect you are those that you allow. :)" to someone's face.

I've had my butt grabbed and pinched by random women. I somehow came away from it not fucked up. I basically dismissed it.

What is it about women that makes something like that more traumatic than when it happens to men?

What part of "men do it because they know women can't do anything about it" are you not understanding here? You can push off a woman if she makes you that uncomfortable. You can enforce your physical boundaries without killing someone. The women who groped you (which I consider sexual assault on their part too) didn't have a foot and a hundred pounds on you. They couldn't have beaten you to death with their bare hands if they got angry. It's not analogous and to pretend it is is just disingenuous.

Shouldn't that be like a phew! Could have been so much worse?

Why would you think "phew!" with a sigh of relief when you know it could happen again and again and escalate without being able to stop it?

Nope, women dwell and amplify any negative interactions to the point of absurdity.

An analogous example that would make you feel like a woman does would have to be absurd because there's no realistic comparison for men in real life. You aren't weaker than 50% of the population and that stronger half isn't constantly reminding you that your safety depends on them being nice rather than anything you have control over.

I think it's because women recognize their main power is pussy power,

If "pussy power" existed, men would take "no" for an answer and we wouldn't be having this conversation. You take your ability to enforce your physical boundaries for granted and flippantly assume women should think the same way you do even though they don't have that same ability.

[–]softhandsam1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

You wouldn't say "Hey [insert female name here], I know you keep getting groped on the bus

Cmon

and catcalled and followed by strangers and the police won't do anything about it,

If they won't do anything it's because nothing illegal is happening.

but the only things that effect you are those that you allow. :)" to someone's face.

So you're saying that because women would react irrationally it's a bad point?

Nope.

What part of "men do it because they know women can't do anything about it" are you not understanding here?

The part where you could get any number of equalizers like guns knives tasers mace etc..

can push off a woman if she makes you that uncomfortable.

And you could do the same?

You can enforce your physical boundaries without killing someone.

So can you. It's called a tazer its called mace.

The women who groped you (which I consider sexual assault on their part too) didn't have a foot and a hundred pounds on you.

That's not relevant. That would only be relevant if she used that size and weight discrepancy to actually do something.

hey couldn't have beaten you to death with their bare hands if they got angry.

What a sad victim world view.

It's not analogous and to pretend it is is just disingenuous.

One person grabbing a man's ass isn't analogous to a person grabbing a woman's ass? Pussypass huh?

Why would you think "phew!" with a sigh of relief when you know it could happen again and again and escalate without being able to stop it?

Isn't the fear that they COULD, and this is your point, hurt you in some way? Why would you not be relieved you weren't hurt unless it's not about being hurt at all, and you're using this false threat of violence to justify overreacting.

analogous example that would make you feel like a woman does

See that? How you FEEL. Not what reality is, it's how you're choosing to perceive reality. If you choose to feel as though you're constantly under threat, you'll find a justification. If you choose to be an adult, you'd see having your butt grabbed by a random isn't a huge deal UNLESS it escalates to something else. You're behaving as though the fear of escalation is anyone's problem but yours. That's your fear. You create it. You could get an equalizer.

would have to be absurd because there's no realistic comparison for men in real life.

Please.

You aren't weaker than 50% of the population and that stronger half isn't constantly reminding you that your safety depends on them being nice rather than anything you have control over.

In what way are men constantly reminding you that you're safety depends on them being nice besides existing?

If "pussy power" existed, men would take "no" for an answer and we wouldn't be having this conversation.

False, I'm saying you're only power is your sex. Therefore you hinge your identity on it and don't compartmentalize things properly.

If you didn't place so much importance on your stinky holes, it wouldn't be so offensive. But your stinky holes are everything you have. You consider your stinky holes sacred. It's you doing that. You're putting your own pussy on a pedestal

You take your ability to enforce your physical boundaries for granted and flippantly assume women should think the same way you do even though they don't have that same ability.

They do, or at least they could, if they bothered to stop playing the victim for half a second and got an equalizer

[–]GGMcThroway1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

If they won't do anything it's because nothing illegal is happening.

Or there's a lack of evidence, or it's "he said she said", or they have the same mindset as you and dismiss sexual assault and further escalations as dramatics until it's too late.

Outright rape only has a 0.6% incarceration rate. Even if you only count the rapes that are reported, it's still only a 1.6% incarceration rate. Anything short of that is going to be even less likely to have anything done about it even though sexual assault, stalking, and the like are illegal.

The part where you could get any number of equalizers like guns knives tasers mace etc..

Which would be considered an excessive use of force unless it's against physical violence or rape. Everything short of that is fair game.

And you could do the same?

Which could easily end in getting the shit beaten out of you if you're a woman because the man is stronger than you. You can't draw a gun in the time it takes to realize that's what he's going to do if he's already right in front of you. But if you draw the gun too early, prison (and that's if he doesn't wrench it out of your hands and use it against you). You'd just have to hope that at that point that you have enough of an opening to use your weapon.

That's not relevant. That would only be relevant if she used that size and weight discrepancy to actually do something.

It's relevant because that's what men do. Which is why you can't just say "well I'm fine when women do it to me". Because the women doing it to you can't overpower you.

One person grabbing a man's ass isn't analogous to a person grabbing a woman's ass? Pussypass huh?

A man is well within his rights to feel as uncomfortable and violated as a woman does when a stranger grabs his ass. He just very unlikely to because he can physically do something about it.

Isn't the fear that they COULD, and this is your point, hurt you in some way? Why would you not be relieved you weren't hurt unless it's not about being hurt at all

Because the relief from getting out of that particular incident doesn't override the fact it can and will probably happen again (even if by someone else). And you have no idea if, when, and how it'll escalate.

you choose to be an adult, you'd see having your butt grabbed by a random isn't a huge deal UNLESS it escalates to something else. You're behaving as though the fear of escalation is anyone's problem but yours.

Sexual assault is assault. Women have every reason to believe that it will escalate since they can't stop a man from doing so. And since so many men have the same mindset as you that "it's not a big deal" until it gets to the point of rape and/or getting the shit beaten out of them, women just have to hope and pray that it won't since they can't do anything about it and no one's going to help them until it's too late. It's not "being an adult" to deny reality and forgo basic risk assessment just to make men feel better about themselves.

In what way are men constantly reminding you that you're safety depends on them being nice besides existing?

Harassment (sexual or otherwise), ignoring boundaries, downplaying experiences, divorcing context from reality to make women sound dramatic for fearing for their own safety and bodily autonomy. Men are fully aware that women can't stop men from doing anything. Men are aware that only other men are physical threats to them. Men would get into far more physical altercations if they treated other men the way they treat women. But apparently women just have to deal with that same treatment since they can't do anything about it. The only thing stopping a man from doing as he pleases is his own conscious and he knows it. Women don't have any actual say in the matter.

False, I'm saying you're only power is your sex.

There is no power in being female. If men collectively decided that women will little more than livestock, women would live their lives as little more than livestock. If women tried to do the same, nothing would happen because women aren't the ones who enforce those mores. The rights for women afforded by polite society were given to them by men and will go away the second that civilization collapses.

They do, or at least they could, if they bothered to stop playing the victim for half a second and got an equalizer

If women start macing and shooting men for the same things men get into fistfights over, the courts will say they're using excessive force. If they just "deal with it", then men will say "it's not really that bad". There's no winning here.

[–]softhandsam1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

It's not "being an adult" to deny reality

Yet you deny the reality that sexual assault is incredibly rare, especially from a stranger.

and forgo basic risk assessment just to make men feel better about themselves.

What the actual fuck are you even talking about.

I'm the one telling you to assess the risk, as an adult, and get yourself an equalizer.

You're the one throwing a fit about risk assessment. It's not risk assessment to be sexist. Saying that you should judge men differently for the way they didn't choose to be born isn't risk assessment.

Getting self protection is.

It's relevant because that's what men do.

What the fuck are you even talking about? Are you sincerely suggesting the majority or even a large minority of men commit sexual assault? That's fucking nonsense.

Which is why you can't just say "well I'm fine when women do it to me". Because the women doing it to you can't overpower you.

But UNLESS THEY OVERPOWER YOU THAT DOESN'T MATTER. You're saying a man grabbing your butt is worse than you grabbing a man's butt because he could overpower you.

But unless he overpowers you, his potential to do so is irrelevant.

I could get a gun and kill someone, in fact you can too, we both have that potential. But unless we actually do it, we can't be judged differently just because we have that capacity. It makes no sense to suggest otherwise.

You're basically saying men and women should have different standards of behavior because of the potential of men. But again, potential is nothing unless acted on.

Women are just selfish narcissistic people who place great value on their stinky holes. I once spoke to a woman who said she'd rather lose a limb or die than be raped.

Can you not understand how hysterical that is?

If women didn't over value their stinky holes the world would be a much more equal and peaceful place.

You don't see men trying to take away years of a woman's life because she grabbed where he shits. Yet women honestly believe their stinky shit producer is so sacred that touching it without permission should result in years of life lost.

The amount of narcissism is baffling. Its truly awe inspiring how petty and self centered women are.

[–]GGMcThroway1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Yet you deny the reality that sexual assault is incredibly rare, especially from a stranger.

Getting sexually assaulted isn't like getting struck by lightning. Women have between a 1/4 and 1/3 change of being sexually assaulted at least once in their lifetime. Individual incidents aren't likely to end in assault, but it's reasonable to assume that at least one will if you're not careful to a neurotic degree. And you don't know which one that will be.

I'm the one telling you to assess the risk, as an adult, and get yourself an equalizer.

And I'm telling you that mace and guns aren't applicable to every situation.

Are you sincerely suggesting the majority or even a large minority of men commit sexual assault?

That's not what I said and you know it. Men [who grope and sexually assault, which I apparently have to specifically specify since you'd rather deflect with #notallmen-isms than acknowledge basic biological reality] know women can't stop them. You'd feel extremely violated if a 7' 400lb male linebacker started feeling you up and wouldn't let you go no matter how much you struggled. You just don't see getting assaulted by someone that much stronger than you as something that would ever happen to you. Women don't have that luxury.

But UNLESS THEY OVERPOWER YOU THAT DOESN'T MATTER.

How out of touch with reality do you have to be to genuinely think assault exists in some kind of vacuum that you can just ignore and that intimidation doesn't exist. All sexual harassment is an implicit threat if the person doing it has the power to act on it regardless of your opinion on the matter. Even if a man doesn't physically or sexually assault in that particular instance, both he and the woman know he could if he wanted to. If the woman mouths off at him, that could escalate the situation. If the woman threatens him, back, that could escalate the situation. The woman has absolutely no power in this scenario and the man is making sure she knows it.

You're basically saying men and women should have different standards of behavior because of the potential of men. But again, potential is nothing unless acted on.

No, I think women and men should be held to the same standards of courtesy and respect. Sexual assault is just as unacceptable when a woman does it as when a man does it. I already said men have every right to feel violated if they're assaulted by a woman. They're just not likely to because they can do something about it. Women don't have that privilege.

I once spoke to a woman who said she'd rather lose a limb or die than be raped.

Can you not understand how hysterical that is?

You're the one who doesn't see how rational it is. You're body is the one thing you're stuck with until the day you die. Being raped takes away the feeling that it's yours since you can no longer pretend you have any real control over what happens to it. I wouldn't blame anyone who would try and kill themselves over it.

You don't see men trying to take away years of a woman's life because she grabbed where he shits. Yet women honestly believe their stinky shit producer is so sacred that touching it without permission should result in years of life lost.

I'm not sure what you hope to accomplish by being that infantile in your description of sexual assault. Men are happy to try and take away another man's entire life if that man "grabs where he shits". Women would do the same thing if they were just as strong. The fact that they can't doesn't suddenly make it okay.

The amount of narcissism is baffling. Its truly awe inspiring how petty and self centered women are.

If we're at the point of childish generalizations now: It's funny how men are so emotionally stunted that they literally cannot comprehend that a person who will never be as strong as them wouldn't feel just as safe as they do in any given situation. It's amazing how they think the world is some safe little bubble of equality where physical strength is totally something a weaker person should ignore or else they're a big meanieface; because men would rather try to justify assaulting women than develop any concept of empathy beyond their own personal experiences.

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[–]death_by_1000_catsI want to get fucked by a guy who wears a blazer10 points11 points12 points 6 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

An acquaintance of mine was recently followed around Costco and then, unbeknownst to her, followed out into the parking lot. She saw a vehicle pull up and the man who had been following her was in the passenger seat. He grabbed her arm and tried to pull her inside; she fought and screamed, and someone came running, at which point the guys drove away.

A couple years ago in my city a girl was raped, murdered and dismembered by a guy she had seen following her on campus a couple of times.

My ex stalked me for weeks, left me threatening notes and snuck into my yard to poison my pets.

I have friends who have had tires slashed, apartments broken into, been cornered and masturbated on and been physically attacked by guys who were obsessed with them.

All of this happened in the US and most of these were in my current city which has one of the lowest violent crime rates in the country. I'm not sure how it's possible to have "never seen anything come from it." Like, you've never heard of a girl being raped or murdered by a stranger?

Granted I think it's kind of ridiculous when girls report breaking down in sobs or LiTeRaLLy ShAkiNg every time they're cat called, but wariness of men following you is not without merit.

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So the idea that you should be constantly in fear of harm that has never emerged is strange.

Please point to where I explicitly say this. When did I say women should be in constant fear of men?

At best, I feel uncomfortable with being catcalled. At worst, I feel genuine fear.

how do you know what their destination was? You don’t. You make assumptions.

Men will truly fight tooth and nail to defend other men won’t they? No you are absolutely wrong. I’m sure some women have mistaken a man for following them, but that pales in comparison to the amount of women that have been genuinely followed by men. You should know it is okay to acknowledge that shitty, creepy, and terrible men exist. It’s okay to acknowledge what women say.

I have absolutely 100% been followed multiple times in my life. It was not by coincidence but by deliberate purpose from those men.

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Soo... just because you haven’t personally heard from a woman who was raped, brutalized, etc after being followed doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. It absolutely does happen. So of course a woman acts accordingly— sexual assault is a very real threat in the world.

So that’s what I was referring to. You claimed it’s not an actual outcome of that experience. It very much is. Just not 100% of the time.

You haven’t experienced the unique kind of danger or vulnerability inherent in the experience a woman has when she is physically smaller, significantly weaker, and also a specific target of predatory men who are in her immediate vicinity and who are specifically following her with sexually fetishistically violent motivations.

Maybe if you had some empathy or common sense, you would understand that without someone having to spell it out for you. But you still have the option of thinking about it now.

You would realize that this isn’t ever a contest between which sex is allowed to express feeling of vulnerability and fear, and that the 2 possibilities aren’t mutually exclusive options.

Just because you feel repressed or unheard or somehow confined to your gender role doesn’t actually mean that women can’t be INTELLIGENT ABOUT NOT RISKING GETTING RAPED. Or even not risking being followed by some creep for even a second longer than is completely unavoidable.

How does this have any relation to you as a man? How is this at all about you? This is common sense, you sound like a tool when you talk like this.

[–]softhandsam0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (26 children) | Copy Link

Soo... just because you haven’t personally heard from a woman who was raped, brutalized, etc after being followed doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen.

I never even claimed that.

You're not reading carefully. My gripe was that women who had nothing happen to them behave as though getting through being cat called is somehow traumatizing and barely avoided rape.

So that’s what I was referring to. You claimed it’s not an actual outcome of that experience. It very much is. Just not 100% of the time.

No. You misunderstood what I was saying entirely.

You haven’t experienced the unique kind of danger or vulnerability inherent in the experience a woman has when she is physically smaller, significantly weaker, and also a specific target of predatory men who are in her immediate vicinity and who are specifically following her with sexually fetishistically violent motivations.

Men are attacked and killed by other men more than women are. Meaning men have more to fear from other men than women.

But keep singing the victim tune.

Maybe if you had some empathy or common sense, you would understand that without someone having to spell it out for you.

Understand what? I never even claimed what you're saying i did lol.

You would realize that this isn’t ever a contest between which sex is allowed to express feeling of vulnerability and fear, and that the 2 possibilities aren’t mutually exclusive options.

I never claimed only one sex was allowed to express fear. I said that logically men SHOULD express more fear because they are the victims more often.

Instead it's women who behave as though they are uniquely targeted by men.

Just because you feel repressed or unheard or somehow confined to your gender role doesn’t actually mean that women can’t be INTELLIGENT ABOUT NOT RISKING GETTING RAPED.

Who ever claimed otherwise? Is it tiring making up things i said for you to debate?

Seriously. Point it out. Quote me where I said women couldn't or shouldn't be intelligent about not being raped please. Or admit you're full of shit.

Or even not risking being followed by some creep for even a second longer than is completely unavoidable.

I don't understand. Please quote where I said you shouldn't avoid a strange man who is following you?

How does this have any relation to you as a man?

This is reddit. It's a place for discussion. I shared my opinion...GASP!?

How is this at all about you?

I literally never even mentioned myself lol.

This is common sense, you sound like a tool when you talk like this.

Your strawman bullshit made up talking points version of me does sound like a tool.

But in reality you're the one making those talking points i never said up.

So if it's you making it up, and it sounds pretty toolish.

Then hey, guess who is the tool?

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[–]eternalwhat1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Round and round we go. Until you face the threat of rape, you obviously cannot empathize. You really should be able to, since all it takes is common sense. But maybe once you’ve had a meaningful relationship with a woman, and you hear from her what life is really like, and you no longer harbor bitterness and callousness toward women in general, I guess this will probably continue to confuse you.

You don’t know what it’s like. You sound really out of touch and unintelligent when you argue on the wrong side of something you know nothing about.

Since empathy is challenging, maybe you’d only be able to grasp the reality when you imagine yourself in the only environment you’re ever as likely to be raped in as women are in normal day-to-life... if you were in prison and you were followed and sexually threatened and intimidated by men bigger and stronger and meaner and scarier than you (try 2-4x your weight, 10”+ taller than you, 4-6x stronger than you), and you knew it might only be a matter of time until one of them caught you and raped you, since they regularly do, you might just experience fear every single time you felt like you had a close call. You might be shaken up. You might feel traumatized by going through life in fear of another close call.

Now try putting yourself in that imaginary scenario... but additionally, you’re a survivor of rape. Your brothers, friends, father have all experienced sexual assault. It can be from a teacher, a cop, a classmate, a partner, a relative, a stranger. It could be anyone who secretly decides they will rape you. It has happened to you before. You’ve heard terrible stories about what has been done to your loved ones. The news constantly tells stories about it happening. Worse, there are many, many cases of it happening all over the world, constantly. Unprovoked. Unwarranted. Vicious. Constant. Universal. Inescapable. Everywhere. And yet only a small % are even reported or deemed worth mentioning. Because this is just every goddamn day.

And you’re followed and intimidated and made to feel that this much larger predatory man is going to forcefully penetrate you and physically restrain you, maybe beat you, maybe suffocate you. Maybe give you diseases. Maybe impregnate you. Maybe disfigure or seriously injure or kill you.

CAN YOU UNDERSTAND IT NOW

I can’t believe I have to explain it this way, but apparently it’s extremely challenging to understand how human the fear is (maybe because you’re too busy hating women and convincing yourself they’re inferior because of some resentment you have toward them)

[–][deleted]0 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Until you face the threat of rape, you obviously cannot empathize.

If this argument holds water it goes both ways right?

You really should be able to, since all it takes is common sense.

Except it isn't common sense to pretend a stranger saying "nice ass!" Means you narrowly avoided being raped.

But maybe once you’ve had a meaningful relationship with a woman,

That's an oxymoron.

and you hear from her what life is really like,

How women feel doesn't necessarily reflect reality.

Statistically speaking that feeling doesn't reflect reality.

So what's more real? Your feelings or the Statistical reality?

and you no longer harbor bitterness and callousness toward women in general, I guess this will probably continue to confuse you.

I'm not confused. I'm disgusted by the narcissism on display.

You don’t know what it’s like.

Not a good argument. I've never been starving to death but I can imagine how awful that is.

You sound really out of touch and unintelligent when you argue on the wrong side of something you know nothing about.

Claiming women who were cat called aren't rape survivors is being on the wrong side of things? Your feelings aren't knowledge. I know plenty about catcalling etc what Idgaf about is women's irrational feelings on the matter.

My gf's friend got in a car accident recently. Everyone was fine. They were overinsured if anything. There was no loss except convenience.

My gf wept. Cried hard. Said she felt scared. The reality is there was no threat to anyone. Yet she still felt the threat that didn't exist.

Now what is reality in this situation? How she feels or actual objective reality?

Since empathy is challenging,

For you apparently. Why am I supposed to empathize but you can't empathize with my point of view? Only women get empathy?

maybe you’d only be able to grasp the reality

The reality is what I'm grasping. I don't/ won't grasp your irrational feelings.

when you imagine yourself in the only environment you’re ever as likely to be raped in as women are in normal day-to-life...

So a very very small chance? Like preposterously small?

if you were in prison and you were followed and sexually threatened

Catcalling is literally never threatening.

and intimidated

You are the one who feels intimadated. It's not the reality that they are trying to intimidate you

by men bigger and stronger and meaner and scarier than you (try 2-4x your weight, 10”+ taller than you, 4-6x stronger than you), and you knew it might only be a matter of time until one of them caught you and raped you,

It MIGHT be a matter of time till I get struck by lightning but it's not rational to worry about it

since they regularly do,

Define regularly.

you might just experience fear every single time you felt like you had a close call.

And I'd hate myself for being that irrational.

You might feel traumatized by going through life in fear of another close call.

You are choosing that fear.

Now try putting yourself in that imaginary scenario...

Did it, I'm still flattered.

but additionally, you’re a survivor of rape.

What the fuck lol. Now every woman is a defacto rape victim? See this is the lunacy I'm referring to

Your brothers, friends, father have all experienced sexual assault.

See this is it again. The statistics on sexual assault don't support your view that all women have been the victims of sexual assault.

So either the numbers are lying, or the people are. And we both know people lie!

It could be anyone who secretly decides they will rape you. It has happened before.

Yes it's happened before. Very very very infrequently. Like struck by lightning numbers if you go off actual crime stats and not self reported surveys.

I can’t believe I have to explain it this way, but apparently it’s extremely challenging to understand how human the fear is (maybe because you’re too busy hating women and convincing yourself they’re inferior because of some resentment you have toward them)

I understand the fear. I understand it's an irrational reaction from narcissistic women who think they are now a rape survivor because someone said they had a nice body part without permission.

Maybe it's because you're too busy hating men and convincing yourself that all of them are rapists to see the reality of the situation.

[–]eternalwhat1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–][deleted]0 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Oh man. MANY WOMEN have had experiences with assault.

Not accusing to stats.

I guarantee you every woman has been assaulted or knows someone close to them who has.

They claim to have been assaulted

But you clearly hate women.

How is that clear? If I didn't 'hate women" I would allow their emotions to dictate reality?

And that’s honestly the primary driver of your failure to grasp this.

Id suggest the failure is on your end.

This is so sad. Your mom would be disappointed.

Idgaf how my mother feels about my preference to view reality through a logical lense vs an emotional one. Anyone who has a problem with that is a problem

It’s fucking scary to be followed and threatened and YES that’s what the fuck catcalls can be.

I'm sure it's scary but why is it you still feel like a victim although nothing bad ever came of it?

[–]eternalwhat0 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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Plus how the fuck are you going to call all women narcissistic for fearing for their safety in a completely rational manner because these things DO lead to women getting hurt??

Are you just not reading.

They are narcissistic for claiming having a stranger say they have a nice body part means they were nearly raped.

Yet you claim you’d be flattered by it and are ALSO faulting women for not feeling that?

I don't care how they feel. Feel however you want. If I think your feelings are irrational, I'll say it.

Why would i not? Why is it wrong to share my opinion they are over reacting but you're not in the wrong for repeatedly attempting to insult me?

What happened to that empathy you claimed to have?

Your take is trash, and you’re a flaming pile, my friend.

Ah yes, unless I agree every woman is raped 32 times a second 8 days out of the week I'm somehow the bad guy lmfao.

[–]eternalwhat1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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Because someone who has a dangerous

Wasn't dangerous.

and traumatic

No reason a stranger complimenting you HAS to be traumatic. In fact I've read many posts where women admit to liking being catcalled and older women saying they miss it.

experience is a narcissist for feeling feelings about it because there are actually other people in the world experiencing different things.

You're twisting my words. THEY are the ones claiming their suffering is equivalent to that of a rape victim.

I guess we should all cease to feel anything ever, lest we be selfish.

I mean honestly ideally yes. The world would be better.

But one can't expect zero feelings. All I want is for people to separate the reality from their feelings.

Feeling scared MIGHT mean you're in danger, but it could also be an overreaction. A misunderstanding. Etc.

But women don't like that concept. If they feel scared, then they believe that is reality. If they feel like someone is following them, that is now the truth.

If they feel like someone saying they had a nice ass is rape, that is reality. They have been raped.

It's just tiresome.

I can't tell you how many times I've had to explain to my gf that I didn't "make" her angry. Her emotions coupled with her passed experiences caused her to react to me doing x with anger.

But I didn't make her angry. I can't force you to be angry. For example I could call you any name I want right now and you might get angry or you might not. That's on you.

But filtering everything through your emotions and actually believing them is toddler level reasoning.

[–]eternalwhat1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–][deleted]1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Jfc it’s not every woman is raped every second.

GASP! I know how much it hurt to admit that.

It doesn’t require an exaggeration. It just requires the actual goddamn statistics. WAKE UP.

When will you wake up and realize the crime stats don't sync up with the self reported stats?

You’re so clueless it’s scary.

Says someone literally fueled by emotions.

It genuinely detracts from the hope I have for humanity to interact with you and find you’re so committed to these shitty shitty ideas.

Your hope that humanity will "believe women"?

I really hope you’re a young guy and you can grow out of all this bs.

And why would it matter? If I never see cat calling as a big deal what would it change for women?

The sick resentment you feel is rotting your insides.

When did isay anything any resentment? Do I resent children for behaving like children?

No.

Just because I think women are irrational about cat calling doesnt mean I hate women

Go out, interact with other humans, and pull your head out of your ass.

I get plenty of human interaction. Doesn't make me think emotions are reality.

[–][deleted]1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

(It’s the loneliness and resentment that spur on your mental gymnastics of hateful twisted logic - women get attention and you’re jealous, and you hate them. Thus they must be dreadful disgusting sluts.. totally disguising your mental illness there)

What the actual fuck. When did i say anything about jealousy? When did i call women disgusting sluts?

See you're proving my point. This is what you feel, so you believe it's reality. Anyone who doesn't kiss womens feet MUST hate them.

That's not the reality of the situation. I just told you I have a gf who is also incredibly irrational but I'm sure you don't believe that because it doesn't match up with how you feel.

Feelings are irrational trash. Living your life dictated by fleeting emotions is so sad. You can be logical, but you're going to have to try.

And it's not always going to feel nice. And you're going to piss a lot of emotions driven people off. But freeing yourself however much you can from your chemical reactions is a noble and worthy thing on its own.

This is not even to mention the other benefits such as becoming an actual tolerable person and not someone with the emotional reactions of a child.

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A wolf whistle falls into the same category. But with cat calling, it can be crass comments, such as degrading names, saying lewd things about your body, talking about the sexual things they either want to do to you or you to do to them. Crass demands to get in the car with them.

It’s not, ‘that’s a beautiful dress you’re wearing.’

Cat calling is not ok. It’s degrading, disrespectful and scary.

What groups tend to be observed doing this the most? There’s no set group.

Is the issue of catcalling overblown or does society not pay enough attention? It’s not taken seriously enough.

Have you ever catcalled? No. I’m a woman.

Have you ever been catcalled? Yes, lots of times. Did you feel your safety was threatened and/or disrespected? Definitely. Or did you ever feel empowered, admired, and/or “seen”? No.

I’m in Australia.

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[–]BlackPorcelainDoll✟ Fear Aŋd Ŧremblinğ 👠 Automods Mistre§§ 🖤1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

This is how I define everything: retarded OLD doesn't count

Catcall --- Direct :: Blunt :: Impersonal (Motivations are obvious, intentions are ambiguous) - says more about the man than the woman.

Flirting --- :: Direct :: Not Blunt :: Impersonal (Intentions are obvious but motivations are ambiguous) - says more about the man than the woman.

Cold Approach --- :: Direct :: Blunt :: Personal (Intentions are vocalized/obvious and motivation is obvious and unique to the man) - says more about the woman than the man.

Being Hit On ---- Direct :: Personal :: Blunt (Intentions are obvious and motivation is obvious) - says more about the both of them than either/or.

I prefer to be hit on or cold approached, flirted with later on the "first date" or whatever. I don't really give a shit much about catcalling, tho. It is some stranger. What would I care what some strange man thinks. I also don't think you can approach, flirt with, or hit on anyone through online dating. Nowadays people think Online Dating is flirting and hitting on someone. It is sad. All these approaches require face-to-face contact for me to consider them legitimate

[–]AutoModeratorMarried to MRS_DRgree[M] 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]softhandsam2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Title	How does society define a “catcall?”
Author	redditthrowaway1478
Upvotes	5
Comments	127
Date	July 22, 2020 7:50 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/hw0q50/how_does_society_define_a_catcall/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-does-society-define-a-catcall.717086 https://theredarchive.com/post/717086

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