I am so angry rn. I feel so hurt and disgusted with some men, I can't even gather my thoughts!

Last week me(23F) and my bf(28M) went to a dinner party at one of his friends house. We had wine, we ate some crap and everybody was having a great time. I felt a bit uneasy, because everybody was at least 10 years older than me. So I mostly stayed and petted the cat.

After some time, the crowed got drunk, I got drunk, my bf got drunk, hell, even the cat maybe got drunk, there was ALOT of expensive wine there. Anyway, I see a guy all sad and down so I go over and try to cheer him up. He said he feels so lonely bla bla bla. Earlier that night, me and my bf went to the rooftop and enjoyed the view. And, I think in my stupid, innocent, idiot mind. Hey.. there is pretty. Maybe this drunk sad idiot would like it and forget his problems. So I took him there. And he seems to be better, so we come back to the party and another guy who just arrived to the party gives me the stink eye. I'm shitfaced so I don't even really notice. We stayed for another hour or so, singing with the group and telling stories, but I get tired and ask my SO to go home. So we did. And I, in my stupid, ignorant mind, think we had a great time.

Well...

Yesterday the sad guy texted me, telling me he likes me alot and I told him I just tried to be nice and I didn't meant to make him believe otherwise. He is cool and the conversation ends there. I tell my SO and we laugh a bit about it. And. Then. He tells me that the guy that arrived last implied I was a bit of an "easy" woman... and I ask him why. And he says that those older, sexist, disgusting men that were at that party, all think I fucked the sad guy on the rooftop................ I ask my bf WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TOOK ME HOME WHEN THEY TOLD YOU THAT???? Like you ask in these conditions. But he said that they didn't actually said it with these words, just hinted it and he realized what that last guy said the next days. He tried to reassure me that he knows me and he knows my heart and that he is sure about my reasoning behind my actions.

But I am so ashamed. I am so angry. I am so hurt. I feel so stupid that my act of kindness was viewed as something dirty. I feel like my body really is dirty now. Never have I ever heard someone MY age say that to me because I was alone with another guy trying to cheer the fucker up. No man my age thinks of me as of I am a whore because I had the nerve to be alone with another man that isn't my SO.

I think I'm gonna throw up.

I feel sick.

I am crying.

Please, tell me something wise and nice because I feel awuful.

  • EDIT *

You are a group of women that I admire for all your input and replies.

I never thought I'll receive so much advice and support here. Thank you.

I just need to clear just some of the events in the post. I wrote them when I was completly stund by the news and I forgot to mention a few things. The man that hold the party (his house) is the only friend my SO has there. We went there because those people have some influence and could help us with our little home made cosmetics business we try to start, so it was really just for connection. Not the case now after I know what I know.

I will turn 24 in september and he turned 28 at the end of this june, so the age gap isn't that awuful. The last man that arrived, he was the only one to imply those things directly, and that was when we were already leaving. The rest I just assumed were thinking the same, because I am almost sure they discussed it after we left.

I don't know if my SO friend thinks those things about me, but it doesn't really matter anyway, because we won't attend at any future parties there. I'm sure I won't.

My SO didn't console me because he was at work when we talked about it and, as a chef, he had just a few minutes to call me and check up on me. He came home at midnight, when I am asleep.

I don't think we should be so hard on him, because I know that he wouldn't let them trash me if they would've said something while we were there. The last guy tried to "warn" him about me..

I don't think of myself as drama queen or anything like that. I felt bad for a person at a party.. Usually when I encounter sexism, is at my work, is at the market, is anywhere but in a friendly scenario. I know how to handle disgusting behavior when I have my guard up. I never ever thought this would escalede in something this nasty. While I was growing up, I had a group of friends all ages, all sexualities, and we never assumed things like that. The boys in my group always saw me and the other girls as pals. I never tried to censor myself around them. I tried to be like I'm used to. I was never expected to pe trashed because of this.

I wanted to reply to all of you, but I thought an edit it's more simple. Now I've learned my lesson and I will not interact like this with a male stranger in any scenario. It was a hard way for me to learn, but maybe it was time. Thank you all again. It mattered to me.