Do girls dislike vulnerability?

neoexileee · 2022-07-05T03:47:33+00:00

No. It’s bullshit. Some girls dislike vulnerability and some girls don’t.

WhoDoomsTheDoomer · 2022-07-05T04:02:55+00:00

Some girls will, some girls won't. It also depends on the situation. There's a time and a place to be vulnerable

ShitFacedSteve · 2022-07-05T07:24:01+00:00

If someone loses attraction to you for expressing your feelings, then they don’t actually care about you. Could it happen? Sure, but I would take that as a sign that they were a person seriously lacking in empathy if after being vulnerable and expressing my emotions the only take away they had is “ugh that was so unattractive”

In my experience women really appreciate it when you can communicate and express your feelings. If anything I think most women consider it an attractive trait when you can be open and emotional.

Not all women are the same, but I think most women see a lot of value and take a lot of pleasure in making deep emotional connections with their partners. It can be a very sweet thing to express what is hurting you to someone who will hold you and want nothing more than to help. Both to the person hurting and to the person caring.

It may not be the same for everyone, but usually people will walk away from moments like that feeling much more connected and attracted to each other.

I’ll end with this: there is a reason that a common breach of ethics therapists make is becoming romantically involved with their clients. Hearing someone’s personal emotional traumas and challenges can deeply humanize them. And sometimes that makes people deeply attractive to others.

moustachelechon · 2022-07-05T07:38:16+00:00

As a girl, I don’t at all, being close to someone who is never vulnerable around me would feel odd, like I don’t actually know them. Comforting people of any gender is what makes me feel close to them, if they just do it for me it feels weird and uneven, I want them to know that they can rely on me when they feel their worst.

KayRay1994 · 2022-07-05T05:58:37+00:00

There is a time and place to be vulnerable, and how you present it matters a lot - it sounds like you did good, so whatever you did, keep it up. Being vulnerable is important but the where and when are the biggest factors - i’ve been vulnerable around women many times, at times its ruined what we had and others it made things stronger - i find that being wise about it makes a world of difference

vcreativ · 2022-07-05T08:49:10+00:00

If someone, anyone, doesn't appreciate honest and genuine vulnerability then they're not in a good place and you should keep your distance.

By redpill logic

There's no such thing. The point is that you worry and keep coming back.

We talked it out and she apologized and I felt good because before I had it all bottled up inside me and was in alot of emotional pain and hurt and couldn’t stop thinking of it.

That's reason enough to do it every time. It doesn't matter if she's interested in you or not.

lilycamilly · 2022-07-05T13:27:55+00:00

Everyone is different, but IMO being vulnerable is an important part of emotional intimacy in a relationship. Being a constant sad-sack is not endearing, but being able to talk about the difficult things in each other's lives and comforting each other can create wonderful, strong bonds between partners.

Sad_Quote_3415 · 2022-07-05T18:48:57+00:00

Number one rule of healthy relationships with women (romantic or otherwise): recognizing they aren't a monolith; they are human beings with personalities, likes/dislikes, and values of their own. TRP teaches ppl that women are these monolithic creatures who act according to their "nature". In order to overcome this ideology, you need to first understand that women are individuals, not robots programmed with the same code.

If you're romantically interested in someone, do not pretend you just want to be friends. Be upfront and accept rejection if that's what they give you. Women are generally cautious when rejecting men bc they are afraid they'll react badly, so they most often try to turn them down nicely. This isn't nature, it's socialized behavior. It's not a rule either. It does not mean they are giving an opening for men to "convince" them. Getting friendly with someone you like romantically just bc of your romantic interest is based in the idea that "women owe men a romantic relationship". They do not. The right thing to do is to always be upfront about your intentions and your feelings. And to know how to respect other people's boundaries. If you feel you can't do that, I'd suggest you first work on yourself before you become romantically involved with someone else.

Also, it's an absolute lie that opening up as a man makes you "less of a man". That's an old fashioned, archaic and unhealthy idea of masculinity and its completely unfounded. Being in tune with what you feel and being open about your emotions makes you more human, thus more of a man.

thetruthishere_ · 2022-07-05T17:39:04+00:00

Women in general just dont like needy whiners not someone that can show emotions, understands his emotions and can control them.

GoodSilhouette · 2022-07-05T20:50:39+00:00

Some women can't handle it, others will stay by you thick and thin.

It really just varies. A lady whos your friend, woman whos depressed or a woman whos just looking for sex etc can handle shit all differently.

Its good you expressed yourself to her, dont let anyone even her shame you for being open about your emotions. It takes a lot of bravery

nightmar3gasm · 2022-07-05T17:44:13+00:00

You were honest, open and vulnerable, and you set a boundary. These are things emotionally mature people do.

If it makes her see you as a ‘lesser man’ that says everything about who she is and nothing about you. Imo it makes you an extremely strong man because your masculinity isn’t so fragile that you feel like you need to hide your vulnerability.

I find this extremely admirable and respectable, and this is a very attractive quality in a person. You should be absolutely proud of yourself.

Did it feel like she recognised what she did that hurt you?

peasey360 · 2022-07-05T20:31:38+00:00

The fact that she apologized means she acknowledged she was in the wrong. She shouldn’t lose attraction to you. I’m going through the same thing with a girl I caught feelings for but just acts with complete apathy for others. She blew me off after I drove 1500 miles to her brothers house to meet his girlfriend. Said brother and his girlfriend berated her but I cut her off. No apology what so ever. I couldn’t forgive her for that.

As for the friend thing embrace it. I’ve slept with plenty of my friends and had romantic implications with them. Love is just a word, friend is just a word, sex is just an action. If it feels like she’s pushing you away it’s time to make a change but She still has the potential to become someone more meaningful in your life.

Sixztyy · 2022-07-05T21:00:45+00:00

Most of the responses throughout the thread here are pretty correct. Everyone’s different so lumping all women into the “heartless” category doesn’t do anyone much good.

That being said I think there are some signs you can pick up on to know whether or not the girl you’re talking to is more sympathetic than others. Things like having general respect for others and her surroundings, honesty, kindness, and having reasonable standards are aspects of a girl who would likely appreciate your honesty and vulnerability, while attributes such as being manipulative, untrustworthy, or in general disrespectful would indicate the obverse.

Hope this at least helps a little!

Gaddammitkyle · 2022-07-06T02:18:25+00:00

A toxic cunt will look down on a man who expresses vulnerability, because the toxic men she fucks does the same. You are the sum of the people you are closest to.

Normal women dont shame vulnerability. They know what it's like to be shit on trying to open up to the opposite gender.

SSaturnis · 2022-07-05T04:04:01+00:00

A large part of being a man is being able to disassociate yourself from others to whatever degree that you need. Treat others how you want to be treated and only concern yourself with those that return such respect.

Its not about being some super amazing alpha fantasy man. Its about being comfortable in your own skin. Try not to externalize yourself like you are.

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axiomatic22 · 2022-07-07T00:14:03+00:00

It depends bro. How often are you vulnerable? Every day? Every week? Few times a month? What were you vulnerable about? Something insecure? Something understandable? What are you like on your not-down days? Strong? Confident? Could she justify your vulnerability? What's her type in guys? What's her dating history? What sort of guys has she gone for in the past? What kind of guy is approved by her friendship group?

Hotlx · 2022-07-05T20:09:39+00:00

The issue is not that she may or may not see you romantically, but that she will use that vulnerability as a weapon when you are actually together. Like snarky comments that she knows will hurt you easily when she’s angry or bothered . And the more you complain about it she may or may not resent you for that weakness. In here I read few people that she is not for you if she sees you as weak or not attracted to you for that vulnerability, but I see it as completely natural if she does that. She wants the best as a partner not someone or something that will drag her down. It’s completely understandable. This is why If you must pay attention and see if she keeps behaving thaT way and just disqualify her or not. Especially after you told her your issue.

Title	Do girls dislike vulnerability?
Author	kingrobinzz-theking
Upvotes	15
Comments	40
Date	July 5, 2022 3:34 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/vron8m/do_girls_dislike_vulnerability/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/do-girls-dislike-vulnerability.1122983 https://theredarchive.com/post/1122983

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