Why do red pill men keep talking about this idea of "only 10-20 percent of men are having sex"?

Atmosphere-Strong · 2021-09-06T01:33:29+00:00

Here to say that yes as a woman, hook up culture sucks. I was more open to "being a hoe" after my divorce so I tried casual dating. Men in these situations do not give a duck about the woman climaxing, they use you like a sex doll. The only satisfying sex was when I was in a relationship.

Bluetinfoilhat · 2021-09-06T01:02:47+00:00

They need to understand not everyone uses tinder and those that do don't necessarily sleep with every connect.

ZacKaizen · 2021-09-06T02:49:39+00:00

It comes from the OkCupid study - that is the only one they quote (and frankly, the only one that supports their argument). When Pearl went on to F&F, she challenged it with a more recent study that indicated that over 70% of single guys surveyed had had sex in the last year, which, unless they were only sampling the "top 20%" is not possible according to the OkCupid survey.

Anecdotally, what I've seen in my life is nowhere close to that 80% number they are citing. In the group of ~50 guys I would hang out with in my unmarried days, maybe 5-10 of them had trouble getting dates.

bjorknbeanz · 2021-09-06T01:00:00+00:00

It's totally from the okcupid thing.

Valuable_Programmer6 · 2021-09-06T04:56:23+00:00

Its insane to think humanity would still be here if only 20 percent of guys were having sex. There point would make more sense if they were talking about highly attractive woman.

PollaTronante · 2021-09-06T01:25:14+00:00

Very little of what they say makes any logical sense whatsoever. Yes, they always quote that one OkCupid article (which also showed that women on that site were interacting with way more than just 20% of men) and also refer to the Pareto principle of economics (which says that 80% of consequences come from 20% of the causes and has literally nothing to do with what they're talking about).

magical_elf · 2021-09-06T13:47:38+00:00

Because they aren't having sex, and want to feel like they're the norm rather than the exception. If 80% of men aren't having sex, it's a societal issue rather than something about them personally that makes them unsuccessful with women. And if it's a societal issue, that absolves them of personal responsibility to change and improve themselves to become a more attractive partner.

They then found the OKC stats that vaguely confirms that (even though it didn't really), and latched onto it as "proof" that they were right all along. And people tend to be less sceptical of things that agree with a worldview they want to hold.

jaredhasarrived · 2021-09-06T06:21:20+00:00

Because they rather talk in their little group therapy session than actually go out and have a life

phlegmdawg · 2021-09-06T06:12:34+00:00

Realistically I think the only people that believe them are other RPers. Common sense destroys this argument, so they’re really just reinforcing it to their fellow deluded RPers.

prolific1997 · 2021-09-06T09:25:45+00:00

Probably online dating where tons of men thirst over only a handful of women. I've seen the inboxes of women whom I've dated and it was full of messages all day long. Obviously they have to be a little picky since they are so overwhelmed.

FacetuneMySoul · 2021-09-06T02:53:11+00:00

They misinterpret that Okcupid data. If I recall, it said women rate men lower than a normal bell curve would suggest but then go ahead and message the “average” men anyway. Anyway, the point is, they only reference stats they can twist to fit their narrative and conveniently ignore the context.

zoemondo · 2021-09-06T03:38:06+00:00

They don't know how to read statistics and they can't fathom how people meet in person.

Chronos2016 · 2021-09-06T02:21:07+00:00

Yeah the narrative really makes no sense. I’m friends with men who aren’t like movie star hunk handsome, but they all have long terms gf’s or are married. And in college they were able to get hookups easily. Some of my women friends have bf’s and husbands who aren’t like handsome dudes but they’re really happy and love them a lot.

It really is about personality and that connection.

wonderful011 · 2021-09-06T04:45:51+00:00

Probably because they aren't having sex. So they think only 10-20 percent must be having sex.

DissonanceBadger · 2021-09-06T13:20:25+00:00

I don't have a harem, my friends don't have a harem, their friends don't have a harem... Must be those few Chads that are hoarding all the women for themselves.

Trgnv3 · 2021-09-06T12:50:50+00:00

While the numbers and the extremity of this is vastly exaggerated, I think there is some truth to this idea, and also the fact that this is a fairly modern phenomenon (at least in recent history). The fact that young people in the West tend to get married late and have relatively high amounts of pre-marital sex or shorter relationships, combined with birth control and relaxed views on female sexuality have created a situation where some people, but especially relatively unattractive/socially awkward young men have a particularly hard time finding a sex partner.

Before everyone got monogamously married off at a fairly young age, and women were to some extent forced to settle for unattractive partners, since everyone else was taken.

I think it's also true that it is much easier for an unattractive woman to find sex than for an unattractive man (though a fulfilling relationship is something entirely different, of course, and equally hard to find).

Most men's and women's experiences on Tinder and the like are genuinely very different. I know plenty of decent looking guys who get very few matches, and I can see how that can lead to exaggerated theories like "only 10% of guys have sex".

I could also see how perhaps 10-20% of men actually get a lot of matches in Tinder, which isn't sex of course, but is a socially visible indication of it.

Kr7731 · 2021-09-06T09:11:17+00:00

This kind of proves it right. https://www.joe.ie/life-style/amount-men-30-not-sex-nearly-tripled-past-decade-663846

JimBeamAndCoke2016 · 2021-09-07T03:02:36+00:00

It's not ONLY 20% that are having sex, it's that they are having the majority of sex, which makes more sense.

Not saying that the other 80% aren't having sex, just no where near as much as the top 20% men. The amount the 80% get will vary, and will get less and less the lower they fall on the looks scale.

Title	Why do red pill men keep talking about this idea of "only 10-20 percent of men are having sex"?
Author	Sad_Quote_3415
Upvotes	42
Comments	58
Date	September 6, 2021 12:53 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/pip3h6/why_do_red_pill_men_keep_talking_about_this_idea/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/why-do-red-pill-men-keep-talking-about-this-idea.1067376 https://theredarchive.com/post/1067376

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