At the encouragement of an FDS Disciple, I (57 y/o) am sharing a comment reply that I wrote, now edited as a post.

Learn from your elders gals: 50/50 is nonsense when women earn less, spend more just to LIVE, give More, and work More on relationships/family matters.

Partnering with any man other than a true Unicorn is a Job (sometimes a worthwhile one!) and there's everything Right with being Compensated for it! Here's Mine as previously told:

I would Still call him an HVM but my ex husband had to buy his way out of certain domestic responsibilities. So he did. And I will always appreciate him for that.

Moments after the wedding ceremony my mother-in-law had grabbed my arm and said "You'll want to hire a handyman. And when you have kids get a good sitter for when you can't be with them, even if he's home. That way you won't come home to a mess."

God Bless her.

No regrets. The divorce terms were reasonable (We had other problems) and she and I are still friendly. Plus I have 2 gorgeous smart Gen Z daughters who are some of the best people I've ever known.

I willingly sacrificed career for motherhood/wife-ing and have paid the price -- minimal travel/leisure, financial insecurity and a more modest lifestyle compared with most of my peers.

It's been well over a decade since the divorce and I have yet to remarry. (He is a career success, on wife #3, and I genuinely wish him happiness. She is a lucky woman.)

In the meantime (while struggling mightily in a job market that rejects/ignores older women) I also received abundant negative feedback and experiences with OLD men. Constantly I was up against entitled or hostile attitudes and full-on abuse/audacity -- since my age apparently means I supposedly have No Value and I should only be so grateful for their fading attractiveness, mediocre sex and non-committal attitudes -- with men my age or Older!

I have lost count of how often I have had to pick myself up and start again.

I quit OLD 3 years ago. Life is good.

Especially at my age and life circumstance it is nearly impossible to meet HVM men incidentally .

S o W h a t.

It's better to live alone and enjoy loving friends/family/my own company and interests, rather than to go Panning for Gold in a Sewer (my metaphor for OLD/dating apps).

I participate in 10k running events, have become trained as a death doula, and got my motorcycle license. (After recovering from my last heartbreak/rejection in 2019 I realized that I missed the Harley more than the man. So..)

I also scraped together every resource I could and bought a small house of my own so that I could finally plant perennial gardens that are MINE not the landlord's, and my daughters will always have a home base if we as a family need a safe harbor, now and going forward.

My current relationship (Worth the Wait!!) is a HVM who didn't blink when I said I would only commit to him if I knew that my financial future would be secure, especially since we are into Life's Third Trimester and he might need me to support his chronic health issues if they worsen in years to come.

My former MIL has been a strong voice both in support of the relationship as well as urging me not to shy away from insisting that he either have a life insurance policy with me as benefactor or otherwise look out for my personal $ecurity.

He owns multiple properties and has agreed to help me keep my own house if need be (Covid Unemployment, my employer has had to lay-off/cut pay, potentially longterm). He has stepped up to sign guarantor paperwork for my daughters' city apartment applications. He will sell one of his properties and mine will be our "country home" but with only my name on the deed. He will make me part-owner/heir to his Manhattan home.

For Valentine's Day he APOLOGIZED for having to attend the Funeral of HIS FATHER that weekend which cancelled our plans, and made sure to send me 2 dozen of the most gorgeous red roses I have ever seen.

He is just a few years older than me and has no children. So he offered to rewrite his will with me as next of kin, and I await confirmation before Going forward with commitment. Once all of that is clear, I will plan having him meet my daughters. He likes my idea of a "surprise wedding" -- where we throw a party for our friends/family, then pause in the middle to take our vows.

p.s. I have been aging naturally. No injections, no procedures, minimal hair dye.

p.p.s. He is a multimillionaire who could collectively buy & sell all of the LV scrotes who treated me like crap. And could have a fancy plastic/enhanced beauty younger than me if he wanted to. But in "winning" me he feels he "is the lucky one. "

p.p.p.s. Wall. F u c k i n g. Schmall.