Maybe he doesn’t hit you.... but

Booty_Hair · 2020-08-12T14:55:10+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you...but he gaslights you until you start to believe you’re the one in the wrong.

indaazz1 · 2020-08-12T15:31:12+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you, but your boundaries are long gone and so is your self esteem

chateauduchat · 2020-08-12T14:56:06+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you... but he calls you every swear name under the sun.

Fatt3stAveng3r · 2020-08-12T15:33:58+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but he coerces you into sex.

VioletRomantic · 2020-08-12T16:42:17+00:00

He doesnt hit you, but he will hit everything else in the house. Walls, doors, windows, furniture, televisions. You live in a house full of holes and broken things now because he can't control his rage, and you walk on eggshells because you know someday he's going to run out of things that aren't you.

elementalvirago · 2020-08-12T15:52:58+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you but he wants to. He thinks about it every time you "mouth off" to him but he knows better only because he doesn't want to go to jail. One day maybe he'll actually do it because it's getting harder and harder not to.

2020-08-12T16:05:33+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you but he gives you the silent treatment after every argument and makes you all kinds of crazy and insecure.

ramya0901 · 2020-08-12T19:17:50+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you.... but he infantilises you. Critiques every decision you make. Veils his insults as jokes and casual sexism. Neglects you when you are sick. Calls it drama and leaves the room when he can’t handle your emotions or anxiety. Treats you well only when he wants something from you. Throws tantrums when you make what he perceives as “mistakes”. Expects you cook, clean and pick up after him. Uses cultural patriarchy as an excuse to justify shitty behaviour and misogyny.

loudest_gusset · 2020-08-12T15:34:16+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but he gets upset if you ever decide to spend time with your friends or family.

VulcanSpaceSquirrel · 2020-08-12T18:25:11+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you... but every time you bring up something he did that hurt you, he denies everything first and ends up devolving into a self-depreciating mess and you end up consoling him instead :/

Derivative31224 · 2020-08-12T16:17:42+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you...but "He fights the urge everyday to hurt you"

aspiclover · 2020-08-12T20:20:25+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you...but he uses you as his emotional dumping ground and freaks out when you need HIS support.

Queencake504 · 2020-08-12T16:58:07+00:00

Maybe he dosen't hit you...but he neggs you .

ieatrainbowsprinkles · 2020-08-12T21:02:57+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but you can’t voice your opinion without him getting angry.

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but you never know what kind of mood he’s going to be in when he gets home from work, so watch what you say.

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but he calls you a psycho for addressing boundaries or disrespect.

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but he says fuck you, shut the fuck up, and calls you a b*tch “as a joke.”

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but he criticizes everything you do. You walk too heavy or got up from the couch too fast.

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but you are bottom on his list of priorities.

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but he’ll hang up the phone as soon as you say something he doesn’t like.

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but he generally ignores you or degrades you when other people are around.

Maybe he doesn’t hit you but he tells you one thing and swears he said another.

Ms_Tilly · 2020-08-12T17:11:37+00:00

I could fill out an entire comment because my last serious boyfriend had a personality disorder and did everything BUT hit me. And at least two separate friends immediately asked "did he hit you?" when I told them about how abusive he'd been. One acquaintance even told me he didn't think he was abusive because he's a "good guy". Like he spent every weekend with him and vacationed with him like I did. They weren't even friends or coworkers. Smdh

AnnieandFish · 2020-08-12T19:04:04+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you, but whenever you say you don’t want to have sex on a given day, you find yourself having sex later that same day.

Orphanedpinkpetals · 2020-08-12T20:07:14+00:00

He doesnt take you to the hospital when you are in pain

Orphanedpinkpetals · 2020-08-12T20:07:59+00:00

He locks you out of the house in the middle of the night

Orphanedpinkpetals · 2020-08-12T20:09:09+00:00

He looks at you like he wants to kill you when you make a mistake

Incredible_Alligator · 2020-08-12T20:17:30+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you but he tells you you're stupid and unattractive through subtle negging and accuses you of cheating on him even though you've never cheated on anyone in your life (or even thought about it).

4E4ME · 2020-08-12T23:11:06+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you, or your kids, but you beg your kids to be quiet in order to "not get daddy upset", even when they are in pain, or have a legitimate complaint like being hungry.

Maybe he doesn't hit you, or your kids, but he has screamed at your kids for "being too happy" when they were happy.

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but you are too scared to have important conversations with him about things like who will pick up the kids depending on your work schedules because you don't know if he's going to be reasonable or if he's going to scream in your face - again.

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but he has thrown you across the room.

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but he has broken your things (his things never seem to get broken). He never said sorry, and he didn't replace what he broke.

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but you don't playfully wrestle with him anymore because the last time you did he "took it too seriously" and you got hurt. And then he told you it was your fault that you got hurt. He didn't apologize.

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but when you talk to people on the phone his first question is always "did you call them or did they call you?" because he keeps telling you that no one likes you and that's the reason that no one ever calls you (but really if you haven't heard from someone in a while it's probably because they don't like him).

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but you are lonely and you have cried yourself to sleep (as quietly as possible) more times than you can remember.

Orphanedpinkpetals · 2020-08-12T20:09:32+00:00

He took your inhertiance money

Orphanedpinkpetals · 2020-08-12T20:10:39+00:00

He belittles you during your panic attacks and says why cant you just enjoy a damn summer vacation like a normal person

feast_or_famine1 · 2020-08-13T02:50:17+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you, but he's threatened to a number of times and says you're responsible for his bad moods and temper.

2020-08-13T03:19:08+00:00

Maybe he doesnt hit you but he calls you psychotic in front of his friends

timetofliptables · 2020-08-13T03:19:16+00:00

Maybe he doesn’t hit you (because he’s too smart and in control to do anything that could get him into legal trouble or jeopardize his career) but he uses every other method available to subtly and not so subtly control and manipulate you into doing exactly what he wants (until to his surprise you leave his ass in the dust.)

Orphanedpinkpetals · 2020-08-12T20:06:56+00:00

He won't let you roll your eyes at others during conversations

2020-08-13T12:29:26+00:00

Maybe he doesn't hit you but he triangulates you with all of his exes and your friends by specifically using them as porn and then telling you you're just jealous and psycho when he completely rejects you for sex.

Orphanedpinkpetals · 2020-08-12T20:08:17+00:00

He gets mad at you for asking him to wear a mask during a global pandemic

2020-08-12T21:20:09+00:00

This comment section could easily be viewed as a checklist of what men to run away from.

Title	Maybe he doesn’t hit you.... but
Author	victoriaairotciv
Upvotes	79
Comments	31
Date	August 12, 2020 6:51 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/i88zum/maybe_he_doesnt_hit_you_but/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/maybe-he-doesnt-hit-you-but.54926 https://theredarchive.com/post/54926

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