Please do not ask out men. Ever

Pahapan · 2020-09-07T20:37:40+00:00

It's a huge ego boost for a man to be approached and asked out by a woman, because it doesn't happen that often. It'll immediately make him think he's hot shit. Compare this to when a woman gets approached and asked out by a man. The vast majority of the time it's uninvited, unwanted, and kind of cringey for her. She is unlikely to get an ego boost out of it because this isn't a rare occurrence and she knows that you don't need to be a particularly amazing specimen of womanhood to get asked out by a man. Completely different mind frames here that women who like to ask men out don't seem to realize.

A man is also unlikely to turn a woman down when she's doing the asking even if he isn't all that attracted to her because...

🍕WOMEN ARE LIKE PIZZA TO MEN🍕

They may not be particularly hungry, they may not even like that type of pizza, but they will gladly take a slice when offered. For a man, getting to date is better than not dating at all (especially if she's the one paying because she thinks the onus is on her because she did the asking out, or if she's a 50/50 girl in general). Getting to be in a relationship with a woman is better than not being in a relationship with one at all because there are SO MANY PERKS for coupled men. Fucking endless. Obviously sex, but also improved social standing as well. Society views men who aren't ever in relationships as losers. Women avoid dating men who haven't been in serious relationships because it's a red flag, even to a lot of PickMes. HIS SOCIAL STANDING WILL IMPROVE FOR HAVING BEEN IN A RELATIONSHIP. The relationship can be complete shit, it can be with a woman he isn't even attracted to whose personality he can't stand, he will still benefit in a multitude of ways.

Never be the one to approach and never do the asking out. If a HVM is interested in you, he will let his interest be known. If a man is interested in you but can't work up the courage to approach you, he's LV. If you're the one doing the approaching then at best you're approaching a LVM who's maybe interested in you but who isn't going to really add anything to your life and at worst you're approaching a NVM who has zero interest in you but who'll be more than happy to string you along for years and even play house while he uses you to level up so he can eventually leave to pursue a woman he's actually interested in. Women need to stop applying their feminine psychology to men. Just because you would turn down a man who asked you out because you're not interested in him/don't find him attractive DOES NOT mean a man will do the same.

ModernDayOracle · 2020-09-07T20:27:27+00:00

Her ex sounds like a complete dick, too. They wouldn't have worked out if she let him initiate because drumroll he didn't care about her from the beginning.

chateauduchat · 2020-09-07T22:09:03+00:00

You do not ever want to ask a man out. You set the tone for the entire relationship as the initiator and the kind of man that doesn’t initiate things in life you WILL come to resent. You will also find that men who don’t initiate typically have characteristics of men who don’t take risks in the workplace or in other aspects or their life, which IMO ain’t sexy

eveninghope · 2020-09-07T23:21:51+00:00

A dude will fuck you even if he doesn't like you. So to them it's like, hey here's some sex until you meet a chick you're actually into.

fim_de_semana · 2020-09-07T21:16:10+00:00

If he doesn’t have the cojones to ask you out, someone else will. Not even pick mes ask men out most of the time, because why would they? Dick is plentiful.

shedragoness · 2020-09-07T22:57:31+00:00

I actually approached the man who eventually became my second husband. But right after I did the initial approach...he took the lead immediately and began courting me.

Microwave79 · 2020-09-07T21:10:31+00:00

I remember reading how to date like a Spartan by G.L. Lambert and the author mentioned on walking up to a guy and initiating brief small talk with him.. But I dont think he mentioned anything about straight up asking a man out.. Plus I wouldn't ask a man out because that would be weird to me... And out of character..

StudentNo · 2020-09-08T02:45:45+00:00

If he's not chasing, he's not interested.

Verysoftbun · 2020-09-08T00:10:44+00:00

I feel like I've also seen this but then after a while the guy gets tired of intitiating so she may still have dodged a bullet. But now she knows.

randomgirlimok · 2020-09-08T00:17:22+00:00

Is this saying that men DO change for the right person? I don’t want to believe that.

skyerippa · 2020-09-08T06:01:44+00:00

FOUR YEARS?!?!?

Revy_Ur_Engines · 2020-09-08T16:26:11+00:00

Oh I saw this thread. It’s amazing that guys don’t understand what they want. You think you like a girl making the first move or all the moves but you’ll end up resenting her and leaving. There were a couple women saying that and the guys kept blame shifting and disregarding their experiences like men typically do

Title	Please do not ask out men. Ever
Author	livelyfire4
Upvotes	180
Comments	31
Date	September 7, 2020 8:03 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/ioevy7/please_do_not_ask_out_men_ever/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/please-do-not-ask-out-men-ever.232171 https://theredarchive.com/post/232171

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