I dated someone who didn't believe in vacations and travelling in your 20s because he wanted to focus on work and building his career. Even convinced me into not taking a travel opportunity with a friend because I'd be wasting time and money.

He overworked himself and never had the energy for anything like dates.

On top of working a 9-5 job, he thought about adding MORE work by taking a part time job at his fave car dealership, when his current job was enough for nessessities and wants.

Sometimes it would feel like he would try to compete with me in terms of life experience and would look down on me or debate my intelligence.

He eventually became too busy to even talk on the phone with me for five minutes. All our convos were via text and not even quality convos. Then when I brought up the miscommunication and lack of effort on his end- I was the bad guy for not being understanding enough.

Eventually he broke up with me because he wanted "to be single for atleast a year so he could focus on work and just focus on his career." I was dumbstruck and shocked and convinced him that plenty of busy people can balance a relationship. He said he just can't deal with "drama" right now. (drama being me asking for effort) and that he would love to be friends with me however because I changed his life and he cares about me. 🤡🤡🤡 ( I obviously said fuck no to that bullshit)

This was years ago, but now and then I'll be interested in a guy... and him trying to impress me would include bragging about how much he works because ambition is seen as high-value ... but now I get triggered by guys who brag about being a workaholic and I get a " thats so raven" vision moment where I could see his bullshit into the future.

Anyways, if anyone could share their stories so I feel less alone in my trauma from dating a workaholic, and to help others see patterns of a love-less relationship for prevention; all is welcome.