I read this quote today and it got me thinking on something FDS preaches all the time: Never build with a man. Apologies if this has been said a million times, but I feel like I've finally internalized this information today and just desperately want to share it with my fellow FDS sisters.

"A woman's loyalty is judged when the man has nothing, but a man's loyalty is judged when he has everything."

This is probably the biggest reason why it’s not advisable to build with a man. Time and time again, women who’ve stayed with men throughout their struggle often get left for younger, more beautiful/previously unattainable women once the man becomes successful. There are tons of examples of this in Hollywood and big tech; Elon Musk being the one that made me think to write this post.

Of course, there are exceptions to this (i.e. Tom & Lisa Bilyeu) but the biggest mistake you could make is believing that you are the exception and not the rule.

This is why you want to always go for already successful men who already have everything. It’s not about being a gold digger. It’s the fact that when a man has everything and chooses to be with you, that’s when you know that he is truly in love with you and wholeheartedly believes that your presence adds value to his life. The majority of men will stay with a woman out of convenience because we do a lot for them (cook for them, do their laundry, provide consistent easy sex, etc.) or because the woman splits the bills with him and help him build his wealth faster. GL Lambert (who I know is somewhat controversial on FDS) actually made an excellent post on his blog about this recently, detailing all the reasons why men stay with women they don't even like.

From my own personal experience, I can say with absolute certainty that being with him before he’s become successful (achieved wealth/fame/etc) will make him wonder if he’s settling for you rather than make him appreciate you for being with him through thick and thin. He will see that with his new fame/wealth/etc he can attract more beautiful women and he will see himself as being able to do better than you. I repeat, by staying with a man while he's broke, he won't see you as "a real one" or think of you as his "ride or die". He will see you as a woman who even broke men can have and he will believe that he can do better than you.

You never want to be the girl that makes a man feel they’ve settled. That's how you get taken advantage of and get your time wasted. You want to make a man feel that he’s WINNING by being with you, and this is only achieved by being with exclusively successful/wealthy men.

Yes, this narrows your dating pool down to like less than 10% of men, but we already know this!!! The majority of men nowadays are LVM, and you're better off not dating them anyway. It's better for your mental health and wellbeing and gives you the time and freedom to live life the way you want to live it. You should alway be vetting no matter what (of course) but being with a man who's already successful is one way to ensure that you're being chosen not for the things you do or the money you make, but because he genuinely sees value in you as a person.