One night, at the beginning of our relationship, my bf and I were having sex (this wasn't our first time or anything). I kind of had a mini internal freak out during it and wasn't into sex anymore but as always was letting the guy finish because I was brainwashed by the blue ball bs. Anyway, he noticed that I seemed off and asked me if everything was ok. I said I was fine and to just finish but that hot ass man did no such thing. He immediately stopped and made sure to talk out what was going on through my head and just sat in bed with me until I fell asleep.

The lesson in the story is that a good partner will make sure that you are enjoying yourself throughout the entire sex session, pays attention to your body language, and checks in to make sure that you are always in a state of fully consenting. Consent means being able to immediately stop even when the penis is already inside of you. I can't believe I guilt myself into shitty sex so many times but I'm also happy that I know what perfect sex can be like with someone that cares.