Why do men have to make everything about them and why do so many people feed into their delusions?

LevelTurbulent · 2020-09-23T03:36:33+00:00

He's upset that men can't find help but he's literally at a sub where men are fully allowed and encouraged to participate. They just don't care to. But somehow's that's women's fault, not the fault of the men who don't bother trying to get any help. Of course, that makes total sense.

GlitterLoveAngel · 2020-09-23T03:30:22+00:00

He’s asking for free emotional labor from the women in the group. He wasn’t getting enough attention so he literally threw a fit so that women will cuddle him. Why do I feel like he’s the narcissist?

pickmieshaexorcist · 2020-09-23T03:31:18+00:00

Be the change you wish to see. I don’t understand what he wants the women there to do, if they are the majority. It’s not like writing fictional media where you can work toward representation. These are their real lives, I mean, does he want them to lie?

GlitterLoveAngel · 2020-09-23T03:44:10+00:00

You wouldn’t believe how many times I’ve seen people including women made stuff about how narcissistic women were worse than men and how male victims somehow had it worse than female victims. Especially when I was searching up videos on YouTube to gain advice with how to deal with my narcissistic family.

I was fine with this sub until this showed up. I joined that sub to gain advice and be able to spot narcissism, not to see men making it all about them.

But hey, every sub is about men or is becoming about men. Literally every single sub. Even female only subs because not only do men constantly lurk these subs and harass the women but apparently female only subs is hating men whereas male only subs is just harmless men being buddies and having fun without women ‘ruining everything’

I’m sick of this whole “men are super duper oppressed” thing and how people buy into it.

People, especially redditors, care about men more than women and believe the delusion that men aren’t cared for and can’t get help without being made fun of. Even though I see more men get help, support and sympathy as compared to women because we always get called Karens, emotional, or attention seeking when we express our real issues and how we really feel. We’re expected to always be happy and cute.

Can men go one day without making everything about them? But more importantly, can people stop letting men get away with this? Because if a woman were to do this, no one would let her get away with it or even give her any support. Even if she was right.

Flufferly · 2020-09-23T06:08:09+00:00

"Men don't make 70% of the posts here, I feel underrepresented"

muricaxoxo · 2020-09-23T03:58:12+00:00

Wait so, the posts are MADE by women and not men. How are they so oppressed??? If they want to, just bloody post!!!! Not really hard imo. They clearly don't want to post and just want attention. This is what happens if you don't deal with your issues from abusive relationships,you constantly victimise yourself even when you're not.

BasieSkanks · 2020-09-23T05:13:55+00:00

He sounds like a textbook narcissist.

UnpeacefulLily · 2020-09-23T11:34:20+00:00

Ugh, so much!

Last year, this feminist group in my country had a women only event. The wait staff, bouncers and everyone involved in the event were women. They had a panel on different issues affecting women and ended with an after party.

The scrotes couldn't stop crying that for 4 hours, women were in a space where they didn't have to watch their drinks like a hawk, they didn't have to put up their guards and could have fun without men around.

Scrotes claimed the event was aimed at discriminating against men. They claimed they will organize their own men only event. And all through last year until coronavirus hit, nothing.

I don't understand the entitlement of men wanting to be centered in every damn time. From subreddit where they can get help to complaining on Twitter about how women are neglecting male victims of assault. Ask these idiots to start up their own movement to help other men who need it and it's crickets every damn time.

When they find help that caters to both genders, they demand that we do the emotional labour and center them. Seriously, f*ck all that!

NoMoreLVM · 2020-09-23T07:45:14+00:00

I sincerely doubt this is even true, I’m sure he just noticed that a few mentioned if gender happened to be to women and perceived that to be a lack of representation of men. Also, is it any surprise when statistically most narcs are men?

IwantyoualltoBEDAVE · 2020-09-23T10:19:49+00:00

He’s not even taking responsibility for himself. My mum’s a narc but I’m not on meds. His decision to medicate is his own personal medical decision

rinabean · 2020-09-23T13:04:23+00:00

I feel sorry for the few men out there who actually had abusive mothers because if one says it, I automatically assume they are the real problem. I am yet to be wrong

Look at him, he's not just a misogynist, no way! He's just a poor victim man who... believes strongly that women shouldn't be allowed to write books for other women. But we should totally take his word for it when he accuses his mother of having children to get money from men because he is very definitely an abuse victim and not a misogynist. You can tell from the way he sees abused women as like him, his comrades, and not the enemy - oh wait.

AnniaT · 2020-09-23T08:17:21+00:00

Men deserve support too and I won't minimize anyone's experience with narcissist parents or mothers but this idea that men can't find support for being men is not true.

2020-09-23T11:49:51+00:00

It's called learned helplessness, and he needs to see a professional to help him see that he has the agency and control in his life now to give himself everything his parent didn't. He could end up really happy and deeply at peace with himself, but he'll probably just keep blaming everyone else for not accommodating his faulty thinking and end up really hurting someone out of bitter entitlement.

Kimpractical · 2020-09-23T15:05:43+00:00

If there are more women posting in that sub then it makes sense. Studies have shown that men are more prone narcissistic personality disorder. So that means, men who are raised by narcissistic parents are more likely to turn into narcissists themselves. You won’t find many of them posting in that sub since they think this behavior is normal

Edit: a quick google search and the first thing it mentions is that this disorder is more common in men https://imgur.com/a/9yu0UEz

2020-09-23T13:07:51+00:00

There's more men on reddit than women by a large margin, so maybe this just means narcissistic parents generally treat their daughters worse. If they were treated exactly the same, the sub should be majority male.

2020-09-23T15:24:37+00:00

Powerful men with cold, controlling narcissistic mothers is actually a very popular TV trope in the US. Examples: Jack Donaghy (30 rock), Archer, everyone on Arrested Development, like what more representation could you possibly want

DadaExperiment · 2020-09-23T16:41:15+00:00

Men: I am uncomfortable when everything isn't centered around me

K80L80 · 2020-09-23T19:19:39+00:00

Yeah I saw that post. It rubbed me the wrong way but I couldn't say anything since it's a support place and he was venting. I don't know what he's talking about, I've been on that sub for years and it's very mixed. Also all the stuff not on reddit I've read/watched has been gender neutral. If it wasn't I didn't notice it and it didn't bother me because the advise is just the same! All you have to do is use your critical thinking skills and apply the same things! Just totally felt like another gendered attack and I can't believe it got so many awards and upvotes.

ekkokekekko · 2020-09-24T05:45:15+00:00

Cameron Esposito has a bit about how everything in the entertainment and consumer space is for men. She is a lesbian comedian but had to sit in the makeup chair to look sexually appealing to straight men for her publicity shoots. She has zero interest in straight men, but everything caters to them, and their gaze. Movies and TV stories are primarily about men and focused on men. The vast majority of fictional narratives are made for men, to the point that anything for men is considered "normal". Anything that isn't will be clearly marked for women, LGBTQ+, etc.

So if a dude comes across a space that seems to have more female/LGBTQ+/ANYTHING OTHER THAN STRAIGHT MALE NARRATIVES, he notices, and feels oppressed, because he's so used to everything being about him all the time, and the idea that he might not have the narrative tailored to him is upsetting, because it's just possible that someone is not thinking about him and his needs for five minutes, and that will not do at all

Title	Why do men have to make everything about them and why do so many people feed into their delusions?
Author	GlitterLoveAngel
Upvotes	73
Comments	32
Date	September 23, 2020 3:24 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/iy2kzj/why_do_men_have_to_make_everything_about_them_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/why-do-men-have-to-make-everything-about-them-and.265715 https://theredarchive.com/post/265715

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