The incel problem

Title_IX_For_All · 2025-01-23T02:50:16+00:00

I recommend dropping the term "incel" in disciplined advocacy because it is fundamentally unproductive and doesn't seem to really address the issue. Celibacy has a very specific meaning in that it refers to sex, so if your primary goal is to address broader but nonetheless related issues like lack of meaningful relationships (male loneliness), limiting the go-to descriptor for the issue to "men aren't getting enough (or any) sex and it's not their fault" is extremely unproductive. Worse than failing to gain traction among fence-sitters, this kind of terminology actively repels.

Vinniikii · 2025-01-23T03:10:39+00:00

The people who benefit (misandrists) see no problem. These people control our schools, explaining the increasing misery and depravity of surplus young men.

There’s a large middle group, deluded, that sees their individual problems as stemming from poisoned, toxic masculinity. Blame men first, blame men for all problems. Because they’re deluded and have individual problems, they can be aided with education. Simply achieving a decent job outside of DEI subsidy economy (or marrying a man with that job) gives them enough individual comfort and prosperity for them to self educate.

Biggest problem I see is neotony, being a grown adult man is stigmatized and punished in schools. Pervasive subsidies are used to prevent natural consequences of low-achievement life from manifesting until victims are 18+ and can be retconned into autonomous adults. Giving young boys freedom/opportunity to achieve (outside of traumatic team sports) is crucial. Teach them to read early, get them working as soon as possible. Single mothers hate this because it removes their subsidy but those mothers never had their sons’ best interests as goals.

Glittering_Smile_560 · 2025-01-23T02:43:29+00:00

Feminism and the believe every woman movement

hentaipolice · 2025-01-23T02:47:27+00:00

There is no easy fix. What's funny is what's happening to us is similar to the Calhoun mice utopia experiment. We're tracking very closely to it and the ending isn't good (the colony went extinct).

Juragam-66 · 2025-01-23T02:52:31+00:00

Until a day comes where women stop thinking they deserve a 6 figure guy but thinks she can go cheat on him, its not stopping

Extension-Humor4281 · 2025-01-23T02:55:19+00:00

Social media drowns women in attention, most of which comes from very horny, very desperate men. Anyone drowning in attention from the opposite sex is going to develop a very inflated sense of their own desirability, to the point where they'll see the majority of people out there as undesirable.

It's not even really a problem with women. It's just simple numbers. The more options you have, the more selective you can afford to be. In the old days, women still got attention, but the numbers were much lower and a natural filter was that a man had to be brave enough to even ask her out to begin with. So unless you get rid of social media (not going to happen) or desperate men as a whole stop bombarding women with compliments online (also not going to happen), women will continue to be highly selective.

So what does the average guy do in order to get become more desirable? Work on yourself. Get fit. Get hobbies. Get a good job that pays the bills well. Get a life that in no way needs a woman to be complete. Because that's the life that a woman wants to be a part of.

Yamariv1 · 2025-01-23T02:54:41+00:00

Are you seriously trying to say that "You've heard".. 90% of young males are virgins.. Cmon, wake up. What kind of BS are you trying to push??

Gayfunguy · 2025-01-23T04:11:25+00:00

Women wont be friends with men like in the not so distant pass. These women talk a big game but they are just as lonely and lacking in social skills as these boys. And if all of you've been fed your whole adult life for twenty years is that men are bad, then you're not really interested in trying to make connections to men of any kind. Im talking genuine friendships and not just sex here. The sex would happen naturally later.

For young gay men im not sure about them being sexless. But still also lacking genuine friendships and friendships with women. As we know feminist women are also deeply homophobic.

How can we foster friendships with women? Especially if they view men in a negative way?

(Also side note, theres still alot of dam kids for some reason. Things dont add up. Whos having all the babies then? 30 year olds mostly?)

ms4720 · 2025-01-23T03:21:18+00:00

First make divorce a loss for women, she does not profit from leaving the marriage. In a generation or two things would be fixed. They would be more motivated to lock down the best reasonable choice they could get. Much of the problem is that 20-30 year old women not even thinking about marriage until they are 30 and have serious emotional baggage from how the small minority of men they found acceptable treated them. To be clear I am not blaming the men here they knew what they were getting into and did it anyway. So bring divorce back to the economic results that existed before WW2 as I understand it: the house, assets, and children stay with the man and she gets a reasonable settlement to restart her life. But that will be limited, assuming a stay at home spouse.

For the case of both work then just keep finances separate, marriage ain't ride or die together anymore so just stop treating it like it is.

KarateInAPool · 2025-01-23T02:48:38+00:00

Femcels are clearly the more prominent issue at this point.

Framing incels the way you are, is like saying knee scrapes are more life threatening than cancer.

dougpschyte · 2025-01-23T06:16:49+00:00

Women's high status & prestige in society comes from their unique ability to give birth.

In a world with 6.8 billion people already, that's become more of an inconvenient fact than an asset.

And it's not as though they're volunteering this service in any case.

In what other areas do they excel over men? Really?

The stock is overvalued. The price of pussy will tumble.

In stockmarket terms, don't expect a dead cat bounce.

couldntyoujust · 2025-01-23T03:36:47+00:00

Well, I don't think the number of virgins is 90%, but I could see 90% being single with no FWBs OR virgins and even then, it would be "of gen z" or "of millennials and gen z" or something like that. Gen Alpha is too young to be included. My son is gen alpha and it would be a right tragedy and sexual abuse for him not to be a virgin (he's almost 6).

But I get your point. There's a male loneliness epidemic which is kinda vague. Men feel more lonely than ever but it's unclear to me if that's lonely because of a lack of dating prospects or partners, or lonely in the sense of lacking close male friends. And it's unclear - if it is both - how many are lonely for one or the other or both.

To say the isolation from COVID didn't help is an understatement. But there's more at play I think. Particularly, I think that women have become more resistant and shaming about being approached especially because of "MeToo", Men have become more afraid to approach because of "MeToo", and dating apps have really screwed up the calculus of finding a mate.

For male friendship, with the proliferation of LGB activism, it's much harder to presume platonic affection in the intentions of men who try to show affection and be vulnerable with friends. Ironically, instead of making it easier, it's made it harder, because now any male friend wanting to show physical affection could just be gay and in the closet instead of just more hands on with platonic affection. It's introduced the same sort of barrier that existed between men and women into the relationships between men. If you say that you're feeling gay, it no longer means that you're in a festive happy spirit. If you give a male friend a long hug, unless they are really close to you such that they know it comes from a place of deep friendship rather than romantic attraction, they feel awkward. etc.

Men today are touch-starved. And it's difficult to talk about emotions without fearing that you'll be perceived as gay or effeminate or even just weak or babyish. But the truth is that as men we need that from our male friends. We need them to know our souls inside and out, we need them to be close like brothers, we need them to not be afraid to touch us, and we need them to be the kind of friends who will mercilessly tease us unless something serious is going on at which point they offer no judgement and just their ear and their shoulder, and avoid teasing that sore spot in our lives because they know how it affects us and will tell anyone who does to back off.

I think there are solutions but it takes intentional effort on our part. I think we need to be more supportive of our friends when they're single and lonely. We need to be more open to friendships and go looking for deep friendships with each other, especially those of us who are naturally introverts. I think we need to remind each other that we really care about each other and will listen without judgement to each other's darkest struggles and biggest hurts. And I think we need to encourage each other and assist each other in talking to and getting in relationships with women. We need to be willing to say "Okay, pretend I'm the girl, what's something you could say to strike up the conversation?" or "Cmon, you can do it, I'm right behind you at the table, go chat up that lady and ask for her number, she's gonna love you." And we need to build each other up.

I don't think that male loneliness is men causing the problem, but I definitely think there are things we can do to combat it.

Vegetable_Ad1732 · 2025-01-23T04:21:41+00:00

Maybe men are finally smartening up?

CryHavoc3000 · 2025-01-23T04:26:05+00:00

Get them off the Internet and meet people in person.

Lonewolf_087 · 2025-01-23T05:22:49+00:00

It’s not easy to fix it involves other people’s perceptions of you and people have very tight expectations. Not everyone will make the grade. Learning how to manage without trying desperately to have a relationship or even have sex has been more helpful than anything. You have to realize you can try and try until you are blue in the face but in many ways it’s not up to you it’s up to them. Unless they change and want to consider a wider range of men well then you will struggle being “good enough” to stand out from the zillions of men who all try to do the same thing. It’s unfavorable with how many men have access to the same woman thanks to the internet and also the insane thirst levels men have these days. It’s weird as hell.

Anyways I don’t expect it to change much so I guess the advice is to live up being single and optimize the ways you make your life complete. Work on yourself as if you were dating but at the same time don’t even care about it. Just be you. You can run your whole life down the drain chasing romance.

Charasmatic-Fiend · 2025-01-23T03:01:25+00:00

Because the "elites" think there should be only 500 million people on Earth. Get rid of the Cabal, and you get rid of the Incel problem.

Doing_Number5 · 2025-01-23T02:59:02+00:00

Granted I have not looked into any figures… but I’m sorrt theres no way those numbers can be accurate 🤣🤣. Where’d you get that

anroxxxx · 2025-01-23T02:59:27+00:00

Incel problem can be solved by making men aware about the basic facts of dating and females from a young age, so that they are prepared to deal with the difficulties of being a man as adults. A few things which I believe should be taught to men are as follows:

Men should be taught about the economics of modern dating. They need to understand that women have objectively easier dating life based on various studies. Women are attracted to a minority of men, and these men are happy with having more than one women in their lives.
Men should be able to introspect themselves, and analyze their standing in terms of looks, fitness etc.
Men should be taught how to analyze their environments(like how many women they are able to interact with), so that they will understanding their likelihood of getting a partner, and will be able to decide whether dating is worth the effort at that time.
Men should be aware that they are going to be rejected majority of the time due to modern dating economics. This will help them handle rejections better, while also preserving their mental health.
Men should be taught about the various ways in which women manipulate them for things like attention, money, status etc.
Men should be taught about the privileges women have both legally and culturally. For ex- in India, a man has to go to jail for 4 days on the words of a woman.
Men should be taught about the effort/reward ratio in various other aspects of life besides dating. For example, a male student studying at the premier institute in his country should be pritarizing his studies/work, rather than spending time chasing women as these things are in his hands. This attitude will help young men prioritize the things they have more control of, and not be a $1MP

If men are taught these things, and various other realities of being a man, they will likely concentrate on things which give them real happiness. This will also change the dating dynamics, as there would be lesser number of men giving unnecessary attention to women, consequently, reducing their egos. Thus, dating would be easier for men, and their lives will be happier, and incel problem will be solved.

catniagara · 2025-01-23T03:43:27+00:00

For men over age 25, it’s 1.9%. Young people are just waiting longer and getting to know each other before having sex. It’s healthier than my generation where you were expected to have sex by 16 or there was supposedly something wrong with you. I’m glad people are taking their time and getting to know each other these days.

Resident-West-5213 · 2025-01-23T03:42:01+00:00

There always had been incels throughout hsitory, nothing new under the sun. Up until the cold war, incels would be enlisted in military, sequestered in monasteries or shipped off to colonies; the problem in modern era is that these options no longer exist, incels don't have a purpose anymore. They can be pacified with gaming, porn, sports and drugs, but those ain't gonna work forever. You don't need woman, you don't need sex, but you do need purpose and community, real, enduring pursuit in life that gives you meaning and a sense of achievement,

Ok-Active8747 · 2025-01-23T03:35:01+00:00

I believe feminism is a small piece. I think on Reddit and social media we catch the fringe of relationships issues. I think the vast majority of dating age men fall into a bell curve. However, I believe face to face communication skills are killing relationships for both men and women. I talk to a lot of people in person and there is a high percentage of people Millennial age and younger who aren’t comfortable having an in person conversation.

Royal_IDunno · 2025-01-23T04:37:56+00:00

People need to quit demonising incels and men in general because that doesn’t help. Majority of incels are edgy hatefilled little cun*s yea but most of them won’t go out and cause mass murder they just whine and moan online. Yes there have been a few examples of incels causing mayhem but not all will go down that path. Get the incels into therapy and teach em how to work on themselves for the better because they need serious psychological help. I personally blame the rise of radical feminism and social media in general for pushing such unfair and biased narratives onto men and basically brainwashing a lot of women that they should only go for the top 1% of men and completely avoid 99% of men. The biasedness against men and the rise of feminism is gunna be extremely disastrous in the not so far future.

jacare_o · 2025-01-23T07:15:35+00:00

Stop paying taxes.

I'm serious. The government has become the middleman between men and women. As a result, women don't need men. The taxes you pay to the government enable this.

I'll elaborate. A couple of thousand years ago, a cave-woman was not able to live without a caveman. The man was stronger and protected and provided for her. The men went out hunting or farming while the women foraged orntook care of house/cave work. A woman would find a man who is capable of protecting and providing that is dedicated to her (love/marriage/pair bonding), have sex with him, and have a family.

Now we have the government. The government provides protection and provision instead of men. It does this through collecting taxes (mostly from men: look at the NZ study). Also, women get preferential treatment because they selfishly whine and nag about their problems (feminism) while ignoring everyone else's problems (female solipsism). As a result, women do not need men to survive anymore. So, the women's standards have become extremely high. She "don't need no man" because the government is her husband.

There are several ways to pay less taxes. Most of them involve real estate investing.

Unable-Dependent-737 · 2025-01-23T05:27:02+00:00

If you’re a “incel”, then as bad as online dating is for men, you need to learn some skills.

I think this sub is more than the incel bull shit

Snoo_78037 · 2025-01-23T06:59:12+00:00

Incels need a caring ear and not a judgmental one. They are maligned for things they can't control. I've been guilty of this, too. Before, I was aware of the MRM and discovering men's issues. The term incel used to just be descriptive, and now it's tantamount to a slur.

tiredfromlife2019 · 2025-01-23T07:07:29+00:00

Nothing can be done.

Woman have career, freedom and money so they are free to only want the top men and not every man can be the top men

So you're left with a surplus of men who have no future.

Used to be they would be sent off to war and either died or came back with a wife or honor, glory and money and thus got a woman or being dead and thus not a problem anymore.

Tracing1701 · 2025-01-23T07:24:26+00:00

People should be seen as human beings unconditionally with intrinsic value no matter who or what they are.

And a person's virginity has no bearing on their value. This idea is archaic and backwards. It's not better than saying that women who sleep with men before marriage are damaged (and stuff like that)

Misandry must be as well shunned as misogyny. So much misandry is ok. Never.

Also, men must be taught to be strong. This is one area where we've actually gone backwards. Strength is good, not bad. Men taught to be weak is a crime against humanity as it's a death sentence for them and a burden on everybody else. It's even worse than beating them up as beating them up does strengthen them, but teaching them to be weak often destroys their lives before they've even begun. (That happened to me. Yes, they trick men on working to be weak then force them to occupy lowest place so they can be higher.)

Everything has it's high and low tides. I hope misandry is at or after it's high tide and that it regresses as fast and as far as possible. It's a stain on humanity that needs to be killed as ruthlessly as all misogyny, anti-semitism, racial supremacy, slavery and so on.

Apprehensive-Alps279 · 2025-01-23T07:37:39+00:00

Maybe listen to them and make them feel seen for once in life. Not just mock then and ridicule more so they spiral even further. Give them advice which isn't easy to do

Felixdapussycat · 2025-01-23T07:48:03+00:00

How much “working on yourself” is enough though? Speaking for myself, I began self-improving five years ago, I lost 70 pounds, created a new wardrobe from scratch, learned how to cook, started grooming myself, got many hobbies (most notably art) and more, but it hasn’t made dating any easier. I still get rejected by every single woman I ask out.

Ok-Cranberry-9558 · 2025-01-23T03:36:11+00:00

Why do we need to fix it?

Unhappywageslave · 2025-01-23T03:05:44+00:00

Can't do anything about it. Women want who they want, we shouldn't force women to like sub human genetic trash. This is a purge of genes. You force the attraction by telling the incel to make 500k a year, learn 50 languages, have superman confidence but all that will do is just have him end up losing her to a guy that her genes are attracted to and the incel will join the red pill space of bashing women. The Manosphere is filled with guys who are incels in denial. Incels in denial are able to get dates here and there because they force the attraction and during the dates and relationship, the woman always treat them like shit like playing on their phones all the time.

She didn't do that to the guy her genes wanted and the guy she pursued.

The other solution which I'm against is make laws oppressing women so these incels will have a chance with them but all that will do is make women miserable like they were in the past.

I like it just the way it is. It's a purge. Back at my time, in the 90s and early 2000s, there were way too many cocky arrogant sub human cocky men who didn't know their place. Now everything is fitting in place, alot of those men's children are now basement dwelling incels and if they aren't, they are incels in denial constantly frustrated with the way women are treating them and they don't know why lol 😂

Title	The incel problem
Author	RandomYT05
Upvotes	45
Comments	68
Date	January 23, 2025 2:40 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1i7tc0s/the_incel_problem/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/the-incel-problem.1541916 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541916

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