What are your values? Do other people share them?

No-Rough-7390 · 2026-02-22T01:19:52+00:00

After some time thinking about this, I almost wonder if this question (in today’s world) has kind of gone the way of vetting in that it can be great to lay out and do, but ultimately it’s not a guarantee of anything.

For me, my values are making a positive impact on others (my profession is based in this and I’ve worked hard to get paid well to do it), hard work, being healthy (in all realms, physically, sexually, emotionally), family, and building structures that are there to support my success. There’s selfishness embedded in there, but no one is coming to save me and I’ve found the best way to get what I want is to make it happen/act towards it.

My wife definitely does, and most women I had met/dealt with before also did (other than my first LtR, but I was very self-sacrificial back then), but like I started with I’m not sure it means a whole lot.

What I’ve found is that women in my life who respect me begin to mirror my values and those who do not shy away from them. A lot of folks enter marriage with a “no divorce” mentality and, lo and behold, end up split. People’s values tend to only ever be as strong as the convenience surrounding them at the given moment. So while it’s nice and all to share them, I’m not sure it means a whole lot in the end knowing human nature.

esdebah · 2026-02-22T05:11:06+00:00

Curiosity, compassion, and creativity. I should probably learn to value independence more, but I tend to form pretty tight romantic bonds. Gotta be smart and playful.

abaxeron · 2026-02-24T09:49:13+00:00

What are your values?

Categorical imperative is pretty close.

What achievements are you working towards?

Finish drawing a comic, patent an actual in-demand invention (or several), help reforest my nearest wilderness areas with something more valuable and beautiful than shitty degenerate pines and birches and firs, read as much as I can of what survived since before 500AD. There was more but this is what I can actually do in time while I'm still alive and in good health.

Do you meet a lot of women who share your values or goals?

I met one who supports me in these things and finds it cute to see my enthusiasm and effort. Took almost three decades to find her, but this is all I ever wanted. Edit: actually I met several, but the rest are married and in their 60s.

Ego73 · 2026-02-22T02:07:17+00:00

I highly value independence, boldness and curiosity. Those don't seem to be all that common among women, at least to the degree I prize them. Just going off of your values, you do sound like we might be compatible fwiw.

As for achievements I'm striving for, just getting a nice job would be fine atm. I'm actually off the market right now due to just how demotivating long term unemployment is for doing basically anything.

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RandHomman · 2026-02-22T17:03:30+00:00

I value friendship, staying true and down to earth, not letting yourself go down the spiral internet memes, clear communication, politeness, being gentle towards others especially to those that work in service industries and most of all, respect of your body and mind. This last one is very important, don't treat yourself like it's a piece of garbage or something to not care about, mentally and physically.

RelevantEscape4535 · 2026-02-23T03:34:52+00:00

Among everything else, I value authenticity. I respect people who are real and consistent. I’m not perfect by any means and social pressure has led me astray before , but I’ve always made a lot of effort knowing myself deeply, even at a young age. Self awareness has always been my main form of self improvement and women who practice self awareness are usually much easier for me to communicate with.

eyewave · 2026-02-23T11:45:47+00:00

"live and let live"

I don't have a loooot of things I'm not able to talk about, but once someone demands that *I think like they think*, I'm gone.

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ComfortableJeans · 2026-02-22T01:51:01+00:00

My values are complicated at the moment.

I'm in the process of trying to make myself worse. So it speak.

I'd always been very soft and sensitive. I was very compassion and caring forward person. Ever since I was little.

I was a big believer in helping others, "doing the right thing" and so on. Most of my life I'd spent doing animal rescue and some volunteer stuff for disabled kids. Being a larger man, I'd be building things, using tools that people the, women staff couldn't use, for places that didn't have the money to hire professionals.

I'd put myself in harms way to protect other people. I've caught more than a few beatings to help others. To where my teeth have been kicked through my lips, lumps all over my head and so on.

I used to work toward this idea that I could buy a small piece of land and take care of the animals there. I suppose it was a dream more than a goal, really. Looking back. But I was aiming for that.

I'd met quite a few women who were immediately drawn into having interactions with me because of that. Whether they shared them or just viewed them positively, I can't really say.

I'd been in relationships with some of them, and at first they adore the type of man I was. They'd fawn over how amazing it was to be with someone so caring to them and others around them, and so on. But they eventually fell thorough due to drawbacks in the way I'd live. What little money I had went to animal feed, tools, replacement tools, paying for vet bills and whatever.

But after 30 something years, I'd started to break down a little. Enough heart break, disappointment, disillusionment, being taken advantage of, let down or outright turned on, I started to give up a little.

I ended up getting high on Codeine, every day for about 10 months or so. Ended up overdosing a while back.

A while after that, I'd look around and see all the people I knew, selfish, greedy, backstabbing people who only looked out for themselves, and I'd see how they'd have everything. The money, long term partners, all the stuff they wanted, vacations, and the like.

So I decided to switch my self up. Make an effort to be worse. Care about others less, take what I could, what's mine is mine and what every I can get my hands on is mine. I'd try to do little to nothing for others unless they were making it worth my while.

The more I tried to force my values differently, the more I'd found I got quite a bit more money. I'd had exes reach out to me to chat. Other girls had shown interest now that I'd switched up. Not just girls, but boys around me were more impressed and tried to be around me more.

The more negative my values became, the more the world seemed to like me. To where even people I'd loved and lost were coming back to me.

But I was caught in a place where I'd have to decide which path wanted to go down. One where I'm my authentic, good self, at the expense of my own life. Or the bad one, where I don't like the way I am, but I'm more successful and more able to fit in the world. Where people want me more and seemingly as though they'd want me for longer also.

It was interesting and upsetting to see that I was more of a worthwhile person the worse I became. The worse my values were.

Eventually I got to sick of myself that I couldn't keep going that way. I reverted back...-ish. I do more animal work now. I basically don't interact with other people anymore, unless I have to. My days now are alone. I take care of strays and hurt animals. I get them medical help. I house them with families and I release wild ones. I also find peoples Other than that, I'm mostly always alone. Have been for a few years.

Being more positive in my values both got me relationships, but ensured they wouldn't last more than a few years. But being worse would have gotten me a lot more, and seemed as though would have gone on for longer.

midnight_blue77 · 2026-02-22T04:11:05+00:00

My values are:

Loyalty
Leadership
Duty
Sense of mission
Charity
Compassion
Retributive Justice
Strength
Perseverance
Autonomy (independence is a pipe dream)
Respect
Gratitude

What I value in a Woman is:

Femininity
Meekness
Kindness
Motherhood
Temperance
Respectfulness
Modesty
Grace (refinement and elegance)

Everything that I value here is based on my placing the ultimate value on a woman giving me her trust. That is the one thing a woman can sincerely give me that I value above all other virtues including sex. Because I have adequate respect for what trusting me entails it also means I do not take it lightly and I do not always take it when offered. It carries immense responsibility that I've found out the hard way I can't manage - and probably never will.

Title	What are your values? Do other people share them?
Author	RelativeCondition915
Upvotes	6
Comments	18
Date	February 21, 2026 6:20 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1raycuy/what_are_your_values_do_other_people_share_them/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-are-your-values-do-other-people-share-them.1573970 https://theredarchive.com/post/1573970

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