What's in a Name?

StingrayVC · 2016-09-12T00:27:57+00:00

I'm dying!

A good friend of mine, her first name rhymes perfectly with her last name and both have the same number of syllables. When he husband introduced us to her, they both just got a bit of a goofy smile on their faces and looked cute about it. It ended up being rather charming.

But this is just cute. Some of those names . . . What the heck were the parents thinking?

Camille11325 · 2016-09-12T00:27:44+00:00

Oh yes I've always considered the guy's last name! There's so much to think about as well - the meaning, complexity (both in spelling and pronunciation), how it looks next to your name in your hypothetical future signature, if you'd want your kids to have that last name, etc. Some people may think its silly or shallow, I bet a lot of RPWs will too. But I'd never want to be ashamed of, embarrassed by, or unhappy, with anything about my marriage or family. Taking his name is a big deal, so I've always giving last names consideration.

This is not to say that all women should next a man if the last name isn't 100% perfect. I'm just sharing my personal thoughts on the situation. If a woman posted to the sub asking about this question we'd have to know more about her, especially her RMV. The more options you have, the pickier you can be. And of course women don't even have to care about this! I just don't think its selfish, vain, silly, or any other negative thing :)

Sunhappy_DC · 2016-09-12T13:07:39+00:00

If you love the man, his last name won't matter. Id roll up in the interview straight neck and all.

"Miss Thundercock?"

"That's MRS. Thundercock, thank you. "

BellaScarletta · 2016-09-12T05:13:22+00:00

I HAD THIS DISCUSSION WITH R TODAY!!!

Seriously. This is wild.

We pulled up to the grocery store earlier and I said "You know, you have a very marriageable last name." He of course asks wtf that meant.

I explained "Well the first date I went on post-HB, the guy's last name was Butterfield...do I look like Mrs. Butterfield to you? No. There was no date two" (not exact last name obviously but it was equally ridiculous). Anyway R's last name is very "last namey". It's on par with any name that isn't common but doesn't sound weird or like real words lol.

He said "So what if I had a silly last name you wouldn't take it?" And I said "Not at all, I just wouldn't have dated you." Of course + goofy smile because frankly if his last name was Butterfield or Sugarmeadow I would probably date him all the same.

He laughed really hard and said he was glad he had his last name then and didn't have to have these worries.

But TL;DR while I wouldn't next 100% because of a last name...yeah, it's definitely been a big factor in the past. Completely floored at the coincidence of this topic being brought up twice today haha.

Irisandoleander · 2016-09-12T14:40:39+00:00

kiiiiinda, It helps that I never really came into seeing/dating anyone with a comedic last name. So I never had to really think about it.

I'm a genealogist, so women changing their name is sacred to me. My husband's last name is interesting, rare, fun, has a great family story. So I was thrilled but it wasn't like a deciding factor to pursue him lol

StillTraveling · 2016-09-12T01:06:51+00:00

I've definitely felt veeeery grateful that my last name isn't this, or isn't that. The worst last name I ever dated was Hopfauf. I'm glad I don't have to live my life with that name, not gonna lie. But Mr. Cumming? OMG. I don't know, my Lord, I just don't know.

tintedlipbalm · 2016-09-12T18:43:32+00:00

Yep, not only do I consider it but it's been one of the main deciders of whether I would date a man or not. This is not something to be explicitly proud of but not something I would really fight against since it makes sense, because in my country they are reflective of a caste, and in a town microcosm, the quality of the family they come from. So there are good families and some lesser quality families, and more broadly, good and less-good names.

This is reflective of a specific culture and more rigid than a "funny" last name that carries no lineage markers as it's been framed in the OP (which would be more about nitpicking than about cultural hypergamy), so I want to emphasize that it's a consequence of my society's structure, in addition to its post-colonial cultural cringe, in which an unusual foreign (whiter, mainly anglo but also French) name carries more perceived value than others.

KlaiFrai · 2016-09-13T22:19:12+00:00

I was conflicted for a while on whether to take my husband's foreign last name, but it eventually grew on me because: it's infinitely easier to pronounce than mine is; there is a healthy population of my last name floating around, whereas his is one of the rarer ones in his country; and despite his assurances that he was happy either way, he's been visibly proud every time a new piece of my replacement ID has come in, though I don't think he realizes how obvious he is.

He still pokes me to use Klai Hisname Frai on my resume because he doesn't want me to be discriminated against, but for the most part I'm enjoying introducing myself as Klai Hisname. And the occasional double take from people when I don't look like a Hisname is kind of amusing.

littleeggwyf · 2016-09-12T07:20:14+00:00

Yep, got to say I did consider it, not in terms of starting a relationship, but I wasn't overly keen on taking my husbands name initially, because it sounded 'northern' to me. By the time I got to getting married, however, I was excited to be officially taking his name. I think my mental image of northerners had changed from 'common, miserable and angry' to 'traditional, loyal and hardworking' by then!

Makes me sound really prejudiced there :( But class and regional image is a big thing in England still, and tbf initially my MIL acted like i was a flighty southern harlot!

tradmarriageftw · 2016-09-13T00:03:05+00:00

My maiden name was difficult to pronounce so it was always on my mind when I was interested in somebody. I remember having a crush on a guy with a Polish last name that was way too long and had way too many consonants that was pretty ridiculous. I got really, REALLY lucky in that department when I got married, but I wouldn't have turned down my husband if his name was hard to pronounce.

ragnarockette · 2016-09-18T23:04:07+00:00

I'm so lucky that I hate my last name and love my husband's. We just moved so I haven't gone to social security to have it legally changed yet, but I'm very excited about it.

ragnarockette · 2016-09-18T23:07:38+00:00

Right after college I worked at the front desk at a gym. We had some seriously weird names come in!

Bunny Slaughter
Deloris Kuntz (spelled this way), whose daughter's last name was Alabia ... from Kuntz to Alabia
Harry Dick Johnson

Title	What's in a Name?
Author	Kittenkajira
Upvotes	7
Comments	21
Date	September 12, 2016 12:20 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWives
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWives/comments/52blaa/whats_in_a_name/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWives/whats-in-a-name.209593 https://theredarchive.com/post/209593

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