Hi, Short background: About 3 months in, lifting, diet, quite fit and nicely dressed. Have seen a little bit of progress but not in the sex, it's still weekly starfish at best. Anyway, since rather recently I'm avoiding shit tests most of the time.

However, one problem I'm facing now is that I believe she is giving me under cover shit tests pretending it's about "helping with the kids". I'm perfectly capable of taking care of our kids (1 and 4 yrs), and I have no problem having them both on my own for a weekend. I actually even think I do it better then her in many aspects.

But as soon as we are both at home together, I get drowned in micro-management such as "could you maybe change his diaper?", "can you please give him his pacifier, it's in the other room", "he got wet, can you change his clothes please" etc etc.

Sometimes it's just normal communication between parent working together of course, but I feel instinctively that the goal is still to establish her as the "manager" and me as the "doer" and then keep those roles in all areas. And the funny thing is the more I do at home, the more of these comes.

One answer would be just "I think you're perfectly capable of doing that yourself", then comes "but I'm busy with XYZ" (other kid for example), which might or might not be the case, or the classic "So you won't do this for your son ?".

Anybody has some feeedback or thoughts on this? Should I just do as with other requests and say "no" when I feel it's not necessary and "yes" when it's most likely not an actual shit test?