Being rejected messes me up

Michigan999 · 2022-05-28T23:16:00+00:00

Uhmm my dude, you WILL get rejected a shit ton at nightclubs because a lot of women actually just want to be on their own. Believe me lol. It's like 1000000% normal. Even Chad will get rejected if the girl just wants to dance on her own. Don't sweat it!

kiramdahanett · 2022-05-29T00:48:19+00:00

Rejection is unavoidable part of having sexual outcomes .

trying to minimize rejections = minimizing sex.

rjx555 · 2022-05-28T23:49:14+00:00

Literally was in your shoes a couple years ago 24 now back then I literally didn’t believe it was possible to pull from cold approach but I pushed through so many rejections and got it done and what I learned from that is you have to have an abundance mindset its easier for me now having gone through the process (when I first began one blow off could send me home for the rest of the night) but the more I became desensitized to rejection the more I realized the girl who I would click with was just around the corner from the one that had rejected me I hardly remember the girls that rejected me its such a superficial rejection too because she doesn’t know you but the girls who I did have good interactions with i created some amazing memories i still look back to every now and then so having that abundance mindset that there’s girls out there waiting and hoping for you to approach yet you give up or let a rejection put you in your head there’s too many girls out here to be tripping over one trust me bro the grass is always greener on the other side if you just keep swimming

countsunny · 2022-05-29T02:39:30+00:00

Only way to get over it is to go through it over and over and over again.

seastarsunshine · 2022-05-29T06:03:57+00:00

Most women have types and it really is hit or miss most of the time. You mentioned how great it felt to see that women wanted you, and I'd suggest to taper that too; basically, stop framing their acceptances/rejections as a reflection of your worth.

its_whot_it_is · 2022-05-29T09:00:10+00:00

The best advice I can give you is read the book “the Subtle art of not giving a fuck” after reading it I slowly started noticing that I do not need validation from others to be happy.

You have to find your own inner voice that validates your self worth.

You’re also very young, so the sooner you realize that everyone else feels judged and insecure, and that their judgment is just projection of their personal insecurities. The more powerful you will be.

Casper3 · 2022-05-29T02:41:08+00:00

She's not rejecting you, she's rejecting your game.

tealifehk · 2022-05-29T00:10:29+00:00

You will get through this. What happened is actually NOTHING. Get back on that horse. You WILL get rejected. A lot. We all do. Once you stop caring you'll be killing it. But you have to fight to get there.

extremeowenershit-23 · 2022-05-29T05:46:47+00:00

Just found this space. I’m home.

Zealousideal6669 · 2022-05-29T07:29:46+00:00

You simply don't actually have a real confidence. If you know that's her loss not your till you still have to work on it. Just imagine that till everything's going well you're at the top of the world you got one only one rejection and it's all gone. Self confidence doesn't come from girls it comes from inside so until you got rejected and you still give af about that you still need to work on it

incognito3107 · 2022-05-29T08:16:28+00:00

You need to pay more attention to emotions and be in present moment, you will feel when it's the right time to approach and how to escalate. It is normal to be turned down sometimes, without any reason. You are not meant to be desired or even liked by every woman instantly in every circumstances, right? It is not normal however, to push against all odds and take rejection so personally.

Silent_Recognition88 · 2022-05-29T08:20:35+00:00

For the love of God, do not start watching PUA videos. They are highly misleading, you're better off watching pranks or food challenges. I digress.

First time I ever kissed a girl was when I was 18, I thought something was wrong with me because it took so long, never compare yourself to those around you, you are on your own journey. I don't think nightclubs are the best place to try give yourself value. Try talk to a girl in a coffee shop or at the library, or on the train, in a normal environment.

Rejection sucks!! But it's like the Sales job, it really isn't personal, they don't know you, who knows what experience that person is going through, the only thing to do is keep on going. I've repeated myself in a few posts tonight, just trying to give you a boost, have value, be cool with who you are, that rejection won't matter anymore, and soon she will come up to you!

Edit: not sure if this is for you or me, but the amount of times I would look away from eye contact, wow! I regret that all now, eye contact coukd be where it starts! You're beating yourself up way to much. Woman are people too, surprisingly just like us, anyways, I've talked to much, hope I made some sense.

CowgirlBebop575 · 2022-05-29T10:53:46+00:00

Your worth doesn't depend on women wanting you or rejecting you. No one is everyone's cup of tea, getting rejected is just part of dating (for everyone).

Start again, you'll get rejected again and you'll be fine.

Canadian-Seductioner · 2022-05-29T12:16:01+00:00

Don't get so invested in random girls. Not every girl will be into you when you approach them. Realize that and it won't be a big deal when you get rejected.

yourcousinrafa · 2022-06-06T17:17:20+00:00

I wrote a post you might find helpful. cheers

https://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/v5zqej/rookies\_guide\_to\_approach\_rejection\_isnt\_what\_you/

Codi_Banks · 2022-05-29T00:12:17+00:00

Watch this video OP

https://youtu.be/fCXrjl1M3kY

Outrageous-Block8877 · 2022-05-29T06:37:52+00:00

Fuck Mark Manson. Fuck other men in general. Just.... Do whatever. Honestly, I can't respect a thing that wants Me to impress It. But, should I meet a cool girl who respects my conversation.... Cool. Girls are flighty and capricious. Man is forever. Lol. Seriously, it's a crap shoot.

MattPruga · 2022-05-29T13:20:17+00:00

You are going to get blown out a lot in night clubs, girls have their slut defense on 100%. Imagine, most of them would feel like whores if they were to be seen making out or even just giving their number to a guy they just met. I like to rationalize, if I get rejected, they are taken.

My problem is the approach, I tried a lot of different stuff and I just can't find the right approach (maybe due to different types of girls). Sometimes I do a normal :"Hey, I saw you, what's your name?" and proceed with normal talk, slight tease, number close. Some girls look at me like I threatened them with a knife after asking a simple question, it's like they want us to fail, like a big shit test.

adaptor1 · 2022-05-29T15:07:26+00:00

I was surprised to see that some women actually wanted me.

There is a portion of woman that likes you, as i see you already got a grasp of this. Identify woman that send you signals and approach.

That is, until there was a woman who rejected me at a nightclub last week.

You shouldn't care about rejection. It does not matter if she didn't like you, maybe she liked you and you did something stupid, maybe you did not escalate sufficiently - next time test her receptivity by touch and sexuality. test > escalate > test> escalate more. if shes uncomfortable, back off and try again minutes later.

It's stupid to over analyze stuff like this. This "did she likes me" state of mind fcuks your interaction up, treat her as if she likes you!

Next time brush it off and approach the next girl!

I don't even notice them sending signals of interest anymore at all.

Of course you don't if you look away :)). Now your body language is full of negative cues, repulsive behavior, you probably have a bitch/fearful/angry face which repels girls in half-a-second. Put your smile back on your face!

Comfortable-Rule-854 · 2022-05-29T17:36:15+00:00

It's part of the game. Simple as that.

You need to "program" yourself accordingly. If you get rejected, but you haven't been a dick to her, be proud of yourself.

Being rejected means that you still made a move!

Also there are a billion reasons why she might have rejected you. Most of them are likely not even because of you or how you approached her.

She might be taken, had a bad day, you remind her of her ex, some other dude acted like a dick 5 minutes ago, she's there with friends, her friend just got dumped and she doesn't want to hook up with someone while her friend feels bad ... there are endless reasons why she rejected you, not because of you but for her own reasons.

Move on, don't take it personal and be happy that you actually left your comfort zone. One day you will understand that getting rejected directly, is way nicer than investing time in someone that's actually not interested in you or having a good time. But likes the attention anyways or is to shy to say no.

Title	Being rejected messes me up
Author	larsson22
Upvotes	42
Comments	60
Date	May 28, 2022 11:07 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/uzyf5y/being_rejected_messes_me_up/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/being-rejected-messes-me-up.1258443 https://theredarchive.com/post/1258443

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