[deleted by user]

MO_drps_knwldg · 2022-10-28T14:54:51+00:00

Don’t make her the focus of your life. Realize you were good enough to get her, and you can get others at her level.

Be yourself and enjoy your life above all else, the more you try to ‘keep’ her, the more you’ll fail

eszibit · 2022-10-28T14:25:54+00:00

If you feel the need to act a certain way i don't think the relationship will last. One of the times you will slip up and she will see it and the trust is gone. My best relationships/hookups were when i was 100% myself. Nasty, crazy, kind, emotional, manly. If she can't learn to love that then your foundation is off and sooner or later it will crumble.

So my advice is, be yourself as much as possible. Not needy, maybe you need to change some stuff about yourself that sucks, but the things you like about you, be proud of them and show it.

There's no guarantee in life, enjoy the ride and see where it takes you. From my experience 9+ girls are not that loyal, the way the system is rigged with opportunities for her is too much for any man to overcome. It's like fighting against nature, if she is so hot she will have opportunities from djs to stars to fitness models, to millionaires etc. Saying no to all of that just to be with you... i don't know, maybe i'm jaded but look even at Bezos, Musk, Brad Pitt, and you'll see that even them can't keep a 9+ . The only relationship that i'd say works right is ryan reynolds and blake lively.

Also it depends on her age. If she's like 30, you have a chance, if she's 24 she usually still wants to explore.

C0333 · 2022-10-28T15:46:04+00:00

If you have to game out your interactions with somebody the relationship isn’t gonna work.

Repulsive-Fee393 · 2022-10-28T14:32:10+00:00

Whatever you do don’t try to be perfect

TheNomadAdventurer · 2022-10-28T15:03:12+00:00

[deleted]

Visualize_ · 2022-10-28T14:48:23+00:00

Sounds fine to me if as long as you genuinely are able to walk away and let her go because you have other options. If it's a front, you eventually will get exposed and it will end

GlitteringPause8 · 2022-10-28T16:27:35+00:00

If you have think like this and be this “strategic” , your days are numbered.

leelbeach · 2022-10-28T18:42:43+00:00

No need to brag haha. Well done and fuck you.

Shadyspartan · 2022-10-28T14:21:54+00:00

I’m sorry, what’s the question?

sinhaanip · 2022-10-28T15:06:38+00:00

I’m getting the nice guy vibes from you. While it’s great that you’ve brought it till here.

Bring up the bad ass side into this but by still being yourself. Girls stick around guys who make them feel the whole spectrum of emotions plus allow them to be comfortable being themselves.

If you could fix this, you should be fine. But again do not show neediness.

frecklie · 2022-10-28T17:13:20+00:00

Dude people are so negative on here lol, I think a lot of the responders have at LEAST as much insecurity as you. "You won't keep her if you have to post on here" etc.

Let me tell you a secret as someone that is married to a woman that makes 6 figures and looks good - they don't have a lot of serious suiters. I was shocked when I got to know her similarly successful friend group that they really struggle to find men that fit their qualifications and are actually gunning for them.

Many many men are essentially intimidated by high income women and feel insecure that they are not the big earner in the relationship. This eliminates a lot of men and leaves them with very high demand men that make huge money and are handsome - the kind of men that rarely settle down. So here are these big earner babes with literally only a few player-type assholes that are left to them and they are frustrated. Especially in their late 20s/early30s when they actually are wise to most of the 'seduction' tips on here. Try negging a beautiful 6-figure 33 year old, it doesn't work.

This girl LIKES you dude, she has a lot of playery type men in her orbit I'm sure but she actually likes.. YOU. Instead of the gamesmanship, my honest advice to you is that you need to pick a moment to be vulnerable and show her that you feel like your connection is special enough that you would consider becoming exclusive.

If you and this woman are ever going to make it, you will need to be vulnerable around her and her around you. Be brave, time it right, and take your shot. If it doesn't work there's always bachelor life again - but you really like this girl. If you don't give it a real try and you bungle this by trying to be too fucking cool for school, YOU WILL REGRET IT.

Good luck :)

TheGamingAnimator · 2022-10-28T17:49:41+00:00

You mentioned she had a 6 figure income and she's attracted to power. Where are you on that ladder? It seems like stuff you shouldn't worry about ,but I've seen relationship go sideways when the woman has the "power" . A man just wants a woman,but a woman wants you to have a whole list of things especially money. And if you're under her financially, she might not look at you the same.

poorshaa · 2022-10-28T20:09:10+00:00

IMO. And this does not work for every person, as everyone is different. But just be honest. I have a very good looking girlfriend who I think is a 10 and has the right personality traits. I didn’t hide the fact I was crazy about her when I first started talking to her. I made it clear that I was so into her it was wild. And she liked it and eventually she became the same way to me and was just as crazy about me. I think it’s silly to play games if you really like someone. But again this doesn’t work for every guy or girl because legit everyone is different. I bet some chicks might probably think I’m weird for telling them i really like them and just wanna hangout all the time right off the bat, but hey it worked for me!

throwaway_lolzz · 2022-10-28T20:33:29+00:00

Really weird that you called her a “high caliber target.” Step 1, think of her as a human

mwthompson77 · 2022-10-28T15:38:39+00:00

If you’re totally 100% invested in this woman, prepare to be disappointed. You should be seeing other women besides her and you should be completely detached. If she’s everything you say, you have a better chance of winning the lottery then keeping her so just live in the moment and enjoy it while it lasts.

Practical_Bedroom914 · 2022-10-28T20:02:53+00:00

I wonder what she would think about the way you talk about her behind her back... like she's a commodity or something🤮

intellectualidiot · 2022-10-28T21:09:40+00:00

Well for a start maybe don’t refer to her as a “high caliber target”. She’s a person.

Woujo · 2022-10-28T19:20:03+00:00

The fact you care about her income is hilarious.

Just play it cool and have fun. if she is into you, she will show it. if not, move on. Relationships are the woman's responsibility.

devilkingx2 · 2022-10-28T18:51:30+00:00

The best thing you can do is continue self improvement and playing the numbers game with a renewed and improved vigor.

In 6 months you should be more stylish, in better shape, with a cooler haircut than you are now.

You should continue to meet new girls and make new friends and build your social circle/social life.

If your value and options are maintained or increased then you have no reason to worry about your girlfriend dumping you or mistreating you outside of there being something wrong with her or outside environmental factors.

the-narayan · 2022-10-28T17:43:13+00:00

Sorry but isn't willing to be friends supposed to be a turnoff? When I said yes to being friends, women never respected me romantically afterwards, it just set a eerie vibe, even those who I dated and then became friends with, it was never really a proper friendship.

CoNoelC · 2022-10-28T19:40:09+00:00

Lockdown game guy checking in.
I have 2 of these in a poly relationship right now (engaged) and looking at me you would never expect it.

You’re on the right path. Keep treating her good outside of the sack, and treating her badly inside the sack. Most guys will not have the balls to slap her around a little in bed. Fuck her like a good hooker.

Assuming she is not slutty (because the best ones usually aren’t), you know you have her heart when she lets you in da butt. Something tells me your past this point though.

Keep her laughing, let her get comfy. Don’t be afraid to compliment. Every woman in the world loves complements (also I nice way to cushion the aggro sex “you’re so beautiful you little whore”).

A good way to move things along without seeming desperate is to either let it slip out (she brings you a coffee in the morning and you slip the “omg I love you” and then get all bashful about it), or say it without saying it “one might say that I have lovish type feelings towards you… lol”. Definitely sprinkle in things like “I really enjoy your company” or “I like taking you places. I usually don’t like taking women places” type of stuff.

Other thing is to subtly separate yourself from the bunch. The best way to do this is poking fun at “desperate guys”.

You’re on the right path. As soon as you think she isn’t fucking anyone else the move is to ask her if she is. Her simple reply of “no” will essentially be the start of an official relationship. When she asks you if you are then you drop a “I mean I could, but tbh I don’t want to. It’s kinda fucked up for me… but I have only been wanting you”.

You got this though bro. Feel free to DM me. Lockdown game is 100% my style and I’ve always gotten 10’s with it despite being like a 7 optimistically.

iab15c · 2022-10-28T19:47:38+00:00

is it sustainable? doesn’t this dynamic tell you she’s not looking for a healthy non-dependent bond? because deep don’t she looks for the validation from chasing someone. these sort of bonds can fizzle out once you become comfortable and actually be yourself. and it would be unethical to continue seeing others once you both are serious. perhaps good to think about if this is sustainable in the longterm

THAT_LMAO_GUY · 2022-10-28T16:17:19+00:00

I had a similar relationship. If I showed much commitment she would punish with ghosting for a couple weeks then sending a booty call.

I recommend you continue to date other women for as long as possible unless there is an explicit exclusivity agreement. But I would bet she has not asked for exclusivity and probably wont.

I dont know if spending the rest of your life with her is realistic. She is demanding to see only the most alpha side of you. You cant maintain that forever.

Assuming she is early 20s her needs will likely change by late 20s and she will want more of the beta side of you and marriage may turn out possible.

g3wb3r · 2022-10-28T17:30:33+00:00

You can't keep any girl buddy without extreme suffering .. enjoy the honeymoon period while it lasts and move onto next girl

mwthompson77 · 2022-10-28T19:00:26+00:00

If you want her to be your gf, why don't you just tell her bluntly, you want her to be your gf? And if that's something she's not interested in to let you know right now so you don't waste each others' time.

Whether you guys keep fucking or not, start fucking other women ASAP until you find one who you're intereted in having a relationship who wants the same thing.

Your "9" may come around weeks, months, years from now, showing interest or maybe not. Who the fuck knows, who the fuck cares.

Just don't put her pedestal, she probably has some goofy traits about her that you haven't been exposed to and poop stained panties sitting in her laundry basket.

Hefty-Wolf2087 · 2022-10-28T16:37:36+00:00

Seems like a lot of details are missing. What's her age? She knows you having feelings for her but it holds little weight unless she has feelings for you. If she is what you say she is. Hope that she have good moral with a level head cause her "dance card" is loaded. That's only the ones you know about also.

ShameAffectionate15 · 2022-10-28T17:29:45+00:00

read my post about something similar about a 10 coworker. I am being too coward about it, hopefully that will motivate you to keep moving forward. When she rejects you willy nilly then you can be friends.

Icy_Rub1839 · 2022-10-28T17:39:49+00:00

If you can get someone like her once you can do it again.

_islander · 2022-10-28T18:56:28+00:00

Even when you’re saying the opposite, it sounds like you’re afraid of losing her, and that’s not a good thing

JackieTreehorn79 · 2022-10-28T21:59:00+00:00

“Tickle the furr and she will follow” - Winston Churchill

Giorgz · 2022-10-28T23:21:15+00:00

Ok, this is too much mental masturbation. I’ll make it simple for you: Tell her you want to be exclusive with her. If she needs time to think about it, let her think about it. But if she refuses, leave her. Also, take the “friends only” bull shit off the table.

Theory: If you’re “trying to win her over”, you’ve already lost from the get go. Your mindset shouldn’t be “what do I need to do to get this person to like me”, your mindset should be “This is what I want and I’m not afraid to ask for it. If I don’t get it, I move the fuck on”. When you’re trying to do things, just to be liked by someone else, you’re still playing a losing game. You shouldn’t be trying to be liked, you should simply be you and if someone likes you then great, if they don’t, then go to the next woman. Don’t do things that you don’t really want to do, just to get someone to do something that you want them to do (I.e. be exclusive in this case).

Just imagine, what is she wants to be exclusive with you but is playing these games with you too because she’s also afraid to ask you what she wants. You’re the man, so be the leader and take charge.

neversleeps212 · 2022-10-28T23:22:49+00:00

Take a step back mate. You’re so focused on getting this girl this girl that you’re “non-neediness” has turned into what’s actually a very needy act at pretending to not care. Focus your energy on investing in your own life not this girl. Try to actually not be needy. Put energy into your career. Make sure you’re hitting the gym and prioritizing your mental health whether that’s vacation, meditation, or something else. Take time for your friends and if you don’t have them put in the effort to get some. And yes, if you encounter attractive women feel free to flirt with and even date them if receptive.

None of this is to say that you shouldn’t keep seeing the original girl or be interested in a relationship with her. But instead of taking your non needy act, actually put real time, effort, and focus onto those things too. When you genuinely come to view this girl as someone who would be additive to your life but not necessary for a happy and fulfilling life, you’ll maximize your odds of landing her by not only being non needy but having an attractive lifestyle for her to be a part of.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	88
Comments	100
Date	October 28, 2022 1:54 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/yfou15/keeping_a_solid_9/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1247560 https://theredarchive.com/post/1247560

Comments