[deleted by user]

lilstxn · 2022-08-22T04:38:00+00:00

It could be one of a million reasons, either face the fear head on and see what happens or go to therapy

Biz_Rito · 2022-08-22T04:32:40+00:00

I don't have any direct, applied advice to give, but I just wanted to say that you're alright and be patient and kind to yourself as work through this. Sex and intimacy are not a race and everyone figures out what they enjoy at their own pace, so resist the urge to compare yourself to what you think should be normal.

For the record, I was well into my 20s before sex became a part of my life and I began enjoying it the most starting in my 30s.

All that will be there waiting for you when you're ready.

peduxe · 2022-08-22T06:25:27+00:00

Sounds like you need more physical interactions with women.

Horny men or horny women will do anything, trust me.

serialkiller_mne · 2022-08-22T06:45:18+00:00

So if I understood tou right, you are not asexual? You can get aroused on porn, on seeing a hot girl walking by?

Before you lose virginity it is going to be nerve wrecking and awkward, but I sure damn couldn't wait to lose mine. When I did I saw it was no big deal anyways, but a nice and pleasurable activity

What exactly are you grossed out by? Could be an intimacy or confidence issue. Gotta elaborate if you have issues that could influence it mate

Fulk0 · 2022-08-22T11:02:33+00:00

Bro go see a therapist. What you feel is probably triggered by something you aren't able to identify. There is nothing wrong with consulting a professional.

Appropriate_Low_1988 · 2022-08-22T04:26:55+00:00

Sex for the first time is probably always going to be difficult. My advice is to let your sexual partner know about your lack of sexual experiences and hopefully they will be understanding.

ApollosSin · 2022-08-22T06:38:18+00:00

Insecurities

python834 · 2022-08-22T04:45:31+00:00

Go swimming. Be comfortable being naked. Then tell the chick you are dating that she would look good on your cock.

texaspete3 · 2022-08-22T07:29:46+00:00

Did you grow up surrounded by a sex positive mindset? The past decade men there have been tons of stories in the media that have demonized creeps i.e metoo, weinstein, epstein etc. Just know that is not you and it will never be you. You are young, and there are many experiences in life that you haven't had. It is your job to experience them to better understand yourself and how you fit in this world. I grew up as a feminist ( still am) and the feminine ideology that was indoctrinated in me severely warped my worldview of women in the bedroom. It took years to develop a more dominant persona in the bedroom which has helped my views on women outside the bedroom.

Basically go out and experience the world, engage in activities you have never done before like sex. Yes it may gross you out but so does trying new cuisine. You may find something you like.

readMyFlow · 2022-08-22T08:42:50+00:00

Probably conservative upbringing making you think that sex is shameful and disgusting. Well my own views started to change when I heard Marilyn Monroe's quote "Sex is part of nature and I go along with nature". In nature all animals exist to reproduce, otherwise they wouldn't exist. However you feel about sex, it's been done by all your ancestors or you wouldn't exist either.

MayhemReignsTV · 2022-08-22T11:36:40+00:00

Most likely, it was the way you were raised. Western civilization, until more recent times(but we still need work), used to portray sex as a taboo, or in the really old days, something for marriage. Especially if kinks are involved. It’s really a shame because it makes people ashamed of their bodies and to express themselves sexually. It’s so deep rooted that people might not even realize this is what’s going on. I believe it stems from religious dogma of the people who settled our country to begin with. We are not shy about displaying graphic violence but oh my God a naked body? But the sooner you can undo all of this programming, the sooner you can truly be free. Of course, all of this might be irrelevant if you experienced trauma in the past. In which case, therapy might be helpful.

MisfiredMayhem · 2022-08-22T10:01:02+00:00

Yeah you might wanna take a look at r/asexuality

Perfect_War5446 · 2022-08-22T10:56:49+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Matt_Bigmonster · 2022-08-22T14:36:39+00:00

Are you sure you are not gay?

DarkSun18 · 2022-08-22T06:23:55+00:00

You could be a sex-repulsed asexual. Only you can decide if sex is something you want or need or not, and there is nothing wrong with that.

Even for people with a normal sex drive, there can be times or moments where the thought of sex is not arousing, just like eww.

HeyitsmeFakename · 2022-08-22T09:16:07+00:00

Well maybe your asexual

damiandarko2 · 2022-08-22T06:41:43+00:00

maybe you’re gay

Amikatey · 2022-08-22T05:27:34+00:00

Ok. Still a 22 virgin here, but I must believe you see it as Bad to embrace your masculine side. And you think women don't want to be fncked. But the truth is that it's only the society brainwashing me,you and everyone else. That showing sexual interest in women is wrong and perversed but the truth is that they want to be feminine while you be the masculine they want to be dominated by you in some way . It's easy to think that way but just work on embracing more of your masculine feelings towards women but from a place of love for them not hate or seeing them as a sexual robbot just see her as a bit of a little sis, you love your little sister right? Yeah but this is a little sister your free to f*ck. Somemindset like that should be all you need.

playboiferina · 2022-08-22T12:26:37+00:00

Just comes with growth. Gotta grow up. Nothing wrong with a woman being attracted to you and wanting to have sex with you and vice versa. Uplift yourself my man. I know as men we probably don’t even view ourselves as attractive for most of our youth but there’s something in all of us that women want.

Perfect_War5446 · 2022-08-22T12:29:01+00:00

When you’re with a girl that you like, try to imagine seggs with her as something you really like? Like cake for example? Do you like cake? Perhaps if you meet a girl you like, bring some funfetti cake or funfetti icing with you on the date and if things start to get more physical , and starts leading to seggs, you can pull out your can of icing and tell her you want to make it more “fun”fetti and start spreading it out on her. Then start nibbling and kissing on her and enjoy the cake or icing and her at the same time!!!!!

You’re welcome! Worked for me 4 times with 6 different women! 60% of the time it works every-time!

MrColfax · 2022-08-22T12:39:13+00:00

This might sound like a weird question but what do you think when you see yourself naked?

Also, do you ever picture yourself having sex?

beDeadOrBeQuick · 2022-08-22T12:51:44+00:00

Try and understand your feelings. Trauma or specific notions about the opposite gender could be the reason why you feel this way. These can be passed down while growing up from home or environment.

Not easy to realise at first

quadfintryfin · 2022-08-22T13:01:34+00:00

Just wait until a girl is sitting next to you and starts rubbing your upper thigh, you’ll be ready to do the nasty

Perfect_War5446 · 2022-08-22T13:17:25+00:00

Hahaha once the tip is in you'll change your mind 100%😅

Disturbed_Aidan · 2022-08-22T13:42:28+00:00

Put yourself in the right place at the right time and trust your instincts.

Exotic_Pop_765 · 2022-08-22T13:45:06+00:00

Psychedelics

2022-08-22T14:28:07+00:00

Do you masturbate? It could be that you have become more accustomed to being turned on in a dark room alone than with other humans.

floppa1984 · 2022-08-22T14:29:04+00:00

It happens man! I definitely feel sex repulsed. Don't let the monkey brained ppl on this sub tell you a man has to have an insatiable desire to fuck everything. That's unrealistic.

Asexuality is a spectrum. Not all aces are sex repulsed, some are just wary and need to take things slow. Others are just in a phase in life. I wouldn't be afraid of the definition.

if you know you're sex repulsed then this subreddit will only make you feel badly for it. this is not a good space to discuss these types of things.

ignitedwolf9200 · 2022-08-22T14:31:22+00:00

Don’t know why no one here is mentioning that you could be on the asexual spectrum. There is nothing wrong with you.

Flomosho · 2022-08-22T14:55:49+00:00

Preface: This is all speculation, it is best to get real help from someone who is trained.

Question: Do you want to have sex outside of any peer pressure or social "obligation"?

I used to feel the same way but I've realized that deep down I'm not one for hookup culture. I was with my then-gf for 1.5 years and we never had sex and I was happy with it.

You may have trauma relating to sex and romance, or you could be asexual or aromantic. Best to ask a psychologist about it though!

BurroughsJunky · 2022-08-22T15:10:55+00:00

My advice is that when you find someone you like and you are considering sleeping with them or cuddling or being sexual or any sort of intimate contact that you articulate out loud that you are having anxiety and fear about that and frankly the right person will I believe in that moment comfort you in a manner that will lead naturally to you cuddling or having sexual activity that he is finding the right person and that takes a persistent pursuit of either online dating or real life interaction with many many people if you are a woman it’s easy if you’re a man you really have to play The Numbers game

joah666 · 2022-08-22T15:54:01+00:00

Maybe you are just asexual

cobraCL · 2022-08-22T15:56:45+00:00

This could be an extremely complex issue, ranging from distrust and fear of the opposite sex, fear of rejection, feeling shame and guilt over one's own sexuality, growing up in a house without witnessing affection between parents, being scared of being vulnerable, or the aftermath of suppressed memories of someone violating your boundaries, space or bodily autonomy at some point.

The mind is skillful at crafting all sorts of armor to protect a person from any kind of emotional damage (past or future).

If this issue bothers you, try to explore your mind with the help of a professional. I am a huge advocate for therapy: self-knowledge is power.

Danielwols · 2022-08-22T15:59:22+00:00

It will be a good idea to look into asexual and aromantic stuff to see if that fits

LMR_Sahara · 2022-08-22T16:04:41+00:00

Don Jon lol

Lukezoftherapture777 · 2022-08-22T16:14:17+00:00

Build your rep. And dont be a creep in any way especially during college. Be patient, find your niche. And most importantly, be smart

LeaderOfWolves · 2022-08-22T16:31:12+00:00

Probably the way people act so willy nilly about sex... Oh well man just be safe & keep wits about you is most important outside of that take it slow

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	101
Comments	74
Date	August 22, 2022 4:22 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/wujqye/whats_wrong_with_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1251472 https://theredarchive.com/post/1251472

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