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[–]Acceptable_Grape5853 78 points79 points80 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
IF YOU GO THROUGH WITH IT PLEASE USE PROTECTION. IF THE WOMAN HAS SORES ON HER FACE SHE PROBABLY HAS AN STD. CHOOSE ANOTHER ONE. I WOULD HOPE THIS GOES WITHOUT SAYING. BUT DO NOT GO DOWN ON HER.
USE PROTECTION.
PS. Your size is actually quite normal. When you're with a partner that's not a hooker you can use other stuff to get them off.
[–]CommercialPlay6204 30 points31 points32 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Fuck noooooooo
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I know right I literally matched with someone on tinder a week and a half ago and last night the sesh was wild. Why pay for something that with the right words is available to you.
[–]MrBlack__ 87 points88 points89 points 4 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link
Do you want sex or do you want a relationship with a woman
If you just want sex, then go for it. But going from porn to sex workers you are digging a hole deeper and deeper for a unhealthy relationship with sex
If you want someone to appreciate you for you, I’d say take a different path
[–][deleted] 27 points28 points29 points 4 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
Hmm I don’t think you understood my main point. It is about the mental barrier regarding sex. My idea was that having sex a few times with prostitutes, without ever having to see them again, could lift this mental barrier.
Kinda like behaviour / exposure therapy if you want. Psychologists use exposure therapy all the time and it’s very successful.
[–]MrBlack__ 38 points39 points40 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
I do, and you can over come that mental barrier with someone who cares about you, or some who does it for money.
I get your theory but sex isn’t like riding a bike, even if you get “good at sex” that won’t create the person you think it will
It’s like starting a diet on junk food because you want to try a healthy diet 1 day.
The barrier you need to get over is dealing with your insecurities then sharing your insecurities with the right woman in a way that doesn’t put the burden on her to validate you…
So you need to get over your dick size, then be able to say to a woman hey, my dick isn’t huge but we can still have fun… good luck
[–]Fabulous-Ad-3127 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I agree, he should focus on his goals and get a caring respectable woman and just be honest with her about his addiction struggles but not in a way that will put her off or make her not want to sleep with him
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
I wouldn’t say anything about my dick size and especially not excuse it, it’s average.
[–]MrBlack__ 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Then what’s your issue?
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Mental barrier
[–]MrBlack__ 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
The barrier is you’re not confident with your size right?
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Kinda I guess, also about not wanting to fuck up
[–]MrBlack__ 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Sounds pretty normal to me… just performance anxiety. I don’t think you need to go to a sex worker to get over that dude.
Just be with a girl who likes you for you, it’s very normal
[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You are missing the point dude. You said it yourself. The first step is to quit porn. I recommend using your imagination and cutting down the use of actual porn. Some can do it cold Turkey others can’t.
[–]Fabulous-Ad-3127 12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
advice from someone who’s been through exact same thing here, had sex with 11 escorts for this reason, I strongly urge you to never engage in the act of sex in exchange for money. All of these girls are in this line of work simply because it’s their last resort to making a living, there might be the odd 1 or 2 who “enjoy” their job and will actually make the effort to make you feel good about yourself and the experience but this is most likely an act to make you a return customer. The first escort I had sex with my dick barely got hard and I struggled to cum but I felt like the man coz I finally had sex. Next one was much more beautiful so I came very fast and fell in love with her becoming addicted to her beauty. (Not literally in love I jus returned several times) Each time I returned I noticed how the second I show signs of being close to cumming she urges me to cum. My goal was always to try to make them cum, I even had one who got FRUSTRATED at me because I wanted to make her cum, probably thought “look at this skinny small dick teenager thinking he’s able to give me an orgasm.” Aside from this I actually have been with 4 escorts who appeared to orgasm during my sex with them and in the moment, because of the sounds and facial expressions and the “vibe” I shared with them before the sex as well as my new “sex experience” and the sheer amount of effort I was putting in to make them cum I believed them. Afterwards I always looked back and wondered did she really have an orgasm or was she faking it for my ego and to make me feel like I was a “special client.” Combine this with the times I’ve struggled to hold my cum for even 2 minutes of sex with these beautiful ladies and had to walk out knowing I just spent £80 for a 30 minute session only getting to actually experience and enjoy less than 5 minutes of vagina, I would say this will not build your confidence but infact can definitely do the opposite unless you somehow find a very honest and open escort who’s happy to “teach you the ropes” but I doubt many could be bothered and would probably just feel sorry for you.
[–]Zankeru 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It can do what you want. There is an indisputable benefit to practicing with someone who wont care how badly you perform. But there are possible downsides also. I've known some guys who did this and lost all interest in switching to real relationships because there was no risk of rejection.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Hmm yeah interesting point. I’d try to keep it to a bare minimum with the prostitutes and not let it spiral into addiction
[–]Zankeru 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I'd recommend making a plan of what you want to practice beforehand, and just stop once you reach those goals. Dont let it become a thing for enjoyment and you should be fine.
I’d wanna practice penetration in different poses, just to see if it works with my dick lol. Everything else like eating pussy I’ve read very much about and feel somewhat confident
[–]Willmek 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I did this exact same thing after my first breakup… I wouldn’t say it helped me through my fear of intimacy because it felt more of a transaction than being intimate. more so it gave me a thrill and made me want to do it again and again cultivating an unhealthy habit and giving me excuses not to approach because why bother when you can just get a prostitute. It took a lot of discipline to break this habit I wouldn’t recommend it.
[–]MercutioLivesh87 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Do they use this specific experiment cause that is wild. Also to your original question the answer is no, subconsciously you'd know it's little more then masturbation.
[–][deleted] 27 points28 points29 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Would an unsuccessful lion get confidence from buying meat at the super market? No.
You can get confident about your dick much easier:
Stop watching porn
Shock therapy: Be naked as much as possible, where it is legal: nudist area, locker room, sauna. It will flip a switch in your head.
man up: No matter how big your expirience or your dick is, there is never a guaranty for success in any encounter with women. Accept that. Don't view failure as such a bad thing, it can teach you something. Our fear of imagined failure is much worse than the actual expirience.
Raise your self-worth: You have to be "good enough" for your partner, but the same applies to her. It goes both ways. You can own who you are right now without the need to earn it in some way, e.g. by have sex with prostitutes.
[–]lalalalalabadman 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
There are so many steps to getting laid. Getting some practice on the last third or so of the steps that you can do in parallel to practicing earlier parts of the pathway with non-prostitutes seems like a much more efficient route to success than having to learn each step from scratch sequentially with all the time investment of mid-pathway failures... it grounds your frame, helping you find out what you like and are aiming for, and giving you the confidence for the earlier steps that if you do get into the bedroom everything will be fine.
The lion analogy makes no sense because his lack of confidence is not about attracting or meeting girls. It's about the bedroom specifically.
[–]TiberZurg 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It sounds to me like you have a big mental blockade and I do think that once you have sex you will get over it. But if you do it with prostitutes you will always be ashamed of yourself. My friend lost his virginity to a prostitute and I am the only one who knows. It's this big secret now that I am not allowed to tell anyone lol. Just do it with normal women, you'll have to face them at some point even if you start out with prostitutes.
I lost my virginity at 24 and I also had a huge mental blockade to having sex. The way I got over it was by meeting hundreds of women and finding one that took a lot of initiative. I was still afraid but I accepted my fears and did it nonetheless. Perhaps you should accept the possible outcome that the first woman you will be with will be completely unsatisfied and will leave you. Accept it and go through it. And even if that does happen, just keep meeting new women until you find one that is satisfied with you. In fact, you should learn love your dick for what it is. You should embrace it. See the positives. Have fun with it. Self-love is attractive and will more than compensate for any reprehension women might have regarding your dick size.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah I am 100% sure that this blockade will go away after a first positive sex experience or just sex in general.
[–]creamyturtle 12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
yes I think it's a great idea. another idea that's a bit safer is just go hang out at some strip clubs and get used to being around hot naked women, having them dance for you, etc. all they do is talk to you the whole time, so it's great practice
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I’ve been to a strip club some times. It’s cool but didn’t really do anything
[–]creamyturtle 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
well you can easily bang a stripper for $150 in the champagne room and it's a lot less risky than some backpage hoor
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
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[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Eh, I got my first blowjob drunk as fuck on holiday in the Dominican Republic. Also by a hooker. Couldn’t care less
[–]cobraCL 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
It may have the inverse effect on your self esteem and body image. My best bet would be to try to detox from porn a bit, and watch your internal self-talk about your body.
I know that it may not matter, but for what it counts women are not obsessed with 'monster cocks', porn scripts are the biggest load of shit. My ex partner was larger than average and it was often the worst sex I've had due to discomfort and pain. Maybe you enjoy the fantasy of having a bigger penis, but in practicality would you really want girls you have sex with to be gritting their teeth and wishing the experience would just get over and done with?
[–]tukipenda 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
A few thoughts: I don't know if I am the best one to answer your question re sex with a prostitute, so I'll let others respond to that. It sounds like the biggest problem is that you are psyching yourself out re sex. Getting experience with sex may help with this, but it might also be worth talking to a therapist about these feelings. A good therapist can help you find the cause of your insecurities and help you figure out how to overcome them. Remember, lots of other guys worry about this same issue, you're not alone. Also, take a look at the book She Comes First by Ian Kerner. Many woman cannot orgasm from penetrative sex, and this book talks about how to give oral sex. The book might be helpful in remembering that for a woman's pleasure, the size of your dick is not always that important (not saying it doesn't matter for some woman, but it's not everything). Worth a read.
Yeah I don’t have any psychological traumas. I had a good childhood, love my parents, always had good friends, was never ever bullied etc. Tbh my life is pretty amazing except the fear of having sex. I’ve spiralled myself into this fear over the years without any real reason or concern. It is a non-problem, still can’t get over it idk.
[–]Chabubu 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
How many dates have you been on with girls in your age range?
How many of those have turned into a second or third date?
How many relationships have you had that are more than 3 months long?
Having sex with a prostitute won’t solve any of those above problems if your answer is 0.
You could have literally no penis and the prostitute is going to do their job. It won’t truly build confidence.
My advice is to lower your standards and go out on lots of dates. Some guys want to date only 9s and 10s while not acknowledging that they are a 5 themselves. So they stay single and celibate while blaming the women.
You may need practice talking and getting confortable and getting in relationships. Being a virgin is completely normal, and you can definitely find girls that are too or that don’t care.
Go date some 4s, 5s and get comfortable around women. Then focus on raising your bar and your standards. You will only attract what you already are.
Hiring a prostitute won’t actually solve the problems you are thinking it will.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
Hmm yeah I have actively dated 3 women. One currently, she’s a 6 i’d say. Pretty hot but maybe 5-10kg too much. Not a problem in any way though, I think she’s cute. We have met 3 times and she’s really touchy, I didn’t try to kiss her yet though.
In the past the other 2 girls were easily 8‘s. Amazing body and face. With one girl I made out a few days in a row on a festival. I basically had a permanent boner making out with her, later met with her in bed for Netflix and chill. I didn’t make a move though so it was just Netflix. Then decided to stay „friends“, missed the shot yeah.
With the other girl I had dates like 2 months, when we were in bed too, I really really fucked up the kiss. It was just bad. Also I was too clingy. Few days later we broke it off.
[–]Chabubu 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sounds like you have what you need. I don’t think a prostitute is the solution. Next time work on initiating and pushing things further along.
If you are concerned about performance, spend more time on the front end being intimate, raising her arousal, rubbing, touching and foreplay without actual penetration. You’ll last longer and she’ll enjoy it more. Physical size should not be an issue with most women and if you are really concerned, just date petite women or Asian women where too much size is actually unpleasant for them physically.
Tell yourself that you’ll accomplish what you want in 12 months and if you haven’t done so by then, then you’ll go hire your escort. But if you really put your mind to it, you’ll get there
[–]cataphract 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It seems like the women you met were just not that into you. Seriously, you fucked up the kiss and that was it? I've met women (mostly with little experience) that were bad kissers but after a few pointers they improve rapidly. Not something over which one would break things off.
Also tell them upfront about the reasons for your hesitations. It seems like the first one might just have thought you were not interested, especially if she was young.
Just find women that are actually interested you and forget the hookers.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
For the one where I fucked up the kiss it was probably more like my general behaviour. It was the first girl I dated and I was way too obsessed and clingy. I would’ve cut the ropes too being in her shoes lol.
[–]Working-Bat906 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Definitely, YES!
I was in the same situation as you, i did it and now i have experience in sex.
Dont let anybody tell you that having sex with an escort is bad.
Bc sex with a connection is the best, but sex itself is still amazing and fantastic.
And also gives u confidence and experience in the topic. Just dont get addicted.
U should ask the same question on the sub r/escortclientsonly and see how a lot of guys overcame the same situation.
Thanks, I posted there too now
[–]Levanes 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I would say yes. If anything it can get you familiar with the female body. Overcoming fear is facing it head on.
EDIT: Don't forget to use protection, even if you think you don't need it.
This was exactly my thought, yeah
[–]Altruistic_Flow_9253 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Imo it helped me a ton bro, try yourself in the field and see how it goes for yourself. I was going through a horrible dry patch a few years back before I was like f it I’m gonna go brothel. Anyway, met some nice girls one in particular which we had pleasant relations before it grew sour. Anyway if I didn’t go to the brothel I might be in the same mess as I am now. But they’ll not just f you they’ll talk to you, you can try at gauging questions in an attempt to show your true self and understand her as a woman. I don’t go anymore but my experiences is what I learnt was valuable for the money I spent. Try it out & think of it as character development
Thanks for sharing
[–]TheDeadlyZebra 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's a good idea if you're a virgin, but it won't make it easier to talk with women or to play the game. It'll only solve one specific problem. You should do this and also focus on cold-approaching and improving yourself.
[–]sexsex69420irl 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Sure,but its not gonna give you any confidence.Confidence in sex comes for actually pleasuring a woman,no?
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
No confidence comes from repetition and being familiar with the process
[–]sexsex69420irl 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I mean some confidence sure,but trust me sex isn't some task that you are already not familiar with,its embedded deep in your DNA.Go through the courtship and then sleep with women,dont skip to the end.
[–]javierthhh 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
To get good at sex no. But I would say definitely do it to lose your virginity. I don’t recommend that until your late 20s early 30s. However getting rid your virginity can help you to stop treating sex as this otherworldly thing. Lots of people are more comfortable having sex than actually kissing for example. You need to drill in your mind that sex its not the goal but just part of the process.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I guess it is nothing bad to use such services if it may help you with your insecurities and sexual frustration. Don't get too addicted with it though, you should still preferably hunt for natural interactions with women, it is much more than just friction intercourse from time to time.
If anything, paying for sex will destroy your confidence. Just stop watching porn and smash some chick from tinder or the nearest bar
The problem with prostitutes is the chance of getting an STD. I can assure you your dick size is perfectly fine and what you see in porn is absolutely nothing like real sex. The vast majority of people don't have the perfect bodies you see in porn, and real sex is very different than in porn. You should stop looking at porn if its causing issues, and see a therapist.
[–]kawaiiobake 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Why not - that's an effective way to build sexual practice. Then you can work on the sex stuff without having to have gotten all the other stuff down first, and then you're not risking a "relationship" you've invested time and energy into, to trial run sexual stuff. Just stay safe, and definitely- don't get into any legal trouble, and use protection!
Man the answers here are really split between no and yes
[–]dont_trust_cats 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
A lot of women might be more off put by the fact that you've been with sex workers than if you had bad game. Just take a leap of faith, you'll see it's not as scary as you make it out to be.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
How would they know …
[–]RProgrammerMan 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Do you want to be the person that does something like this and lies about it? That will only hurt your confidence. How would you feel if a girl you’re dating did this to you?
[–]collectingsouls 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Because they put a sex worker tattoo on your balls … You are right, they wing know unless you tell them or get arrested (if ilegal in your state/country )
[–]svendfe 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Get a psychologist, not a prostitute
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Can’t imagine that he could do anything and it’s nearly impossible to get one here. They are booked out 1 year prior
[–]tomalek9 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
While I’m also all for getting a prostitute, it sounds like you may have some issues a psychologist can help you with.
Here in the US there are many folks that will video chat with you, so location shouldn’t matter. I would imagine it’s similar elsewhere in the world.
With all that said, get your rocks off and enjoy yourself too. These women provide a needed service for men, so take advantage of that (and pay them generously for a good job)
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link
Let me just say Europe and like 30-50€ for 30mins.
[–]AllTankiesAreB 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You are either german or dutch lmao
Yeah
[–]RareWar5420 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
30e?? Are they independant or do they work in some sort of spa?
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Bro who cares nobody addressed my main topic yet
[–]RareWar5420 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link
dude im helping you. 30e for prostitutes sounds nasty and disgusting, independant workers dont give a fuck about hygiene and STDs but go bang whatever comes up to you lmao
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
It’s really popular here and they get regularly checked and clean themselves in their rooms. Think about it this way, why would young girls who just want some extra bucks for their studies or in general risk health concerns? They are fine.
[–]BeautifulTomatillo 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I really hope that you make sure the women you’re going to see aren’t being sexist trafficked. Even if they’re not it’s likely they’re poor immigrants who have no support network or other options for work. Brothels are inherently exploitative
[–]RareWar5420 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
Fine then bcs here 30e prostitues are mostly half homeless girls who dont get checked up i wouldnt have my first time with a prostitute tho kinda sad
Yeah I mean it’s kinda sad but idk maybe it is what I need to get over some fears. Im even currently dating a girl and things are fine but kinda scared if it comes to sex tho.
[–]RareWar5420 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Do your 1st time with your girl, whats gonna happen ? If she dumps you cuz u suck at bed for your first time then she's for the streets. its literally a win win scenario. you either end up fucking a respectable girl who stays with you or you fuck a girl who leaves u cuz she's a bitch
[–]creative-guy505 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I live nearby, how do you find them?
Just huge brothels in some cities, not a secret
[–]gregsapopin 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If you have access to prostitutes why the hell are you on here?
[–]mean_squared 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Given the fact that a prostitute has already slept with countless men and probably has seen some huge dicks, what if she adds fuel to your burning insecurities by letting you know that she could never be satisfied with a dick of your size? Are you ready to handle that?
[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Lol prostitites don’t say this kinda stuff. And who cares if she’s satisfied or not
[–]mean_squared 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Alright. You do you
[–]lalalalalabadman 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
5-10 is probably too many and riskier for giving you a bad mindset, but by all means do this 1-3 times (different girls so you don't catch feelings, or at least so you kill feelings you do catch). Read reviews and find one that either enjoys her job, or acts like it enough that you won't know she doesn't. Then force yourself not to care which of those two is true, she's not your wife, she's your very first practice.
I don't know if this will help you decide your above-average dick is big enough, but your theories elsewhere in the thread about building general bedroom confidence by experience are absolutely correct IME. Don't worry about getting her off with your dick if you're a virgin, I kinda doubt anybody does that their first few times. Give her some pleasure but remember the point of this exercise is for you to have fun so you can have that grounding of having-been-in-the-bedroom-before-and-liked-it, which makes the earlier steps of pickup and dating WAY easier.
[–]Penguin154 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'll be honest man, based your responses it seems like what you really want here is for some people to tell you to do it rather than whether or not you should. So in all my flightless glory I grant thee permission. Just be safe like many have mentioned. Also, don't forget that they are people too. Be respectful.
[–]buzzerhoops 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Yea I think it would help the mental barrier other people don’t even know what you’re asking talking about relationships and shit but you need to get over this mental block before you even consider a relationship so do what you think is best for you to overcome it
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah you seem to get the point. I’ll think some more about it and then decide. Currently I’m dating a girl, depending on how it develops I might just fuck her as well
[–]buzzerhoops 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Girls really don’t care about dick size (especially if they like you) but I’m sure you’ll do the right thing you seem smart but I’d still fuck a prostitute for the mental block first
[–]Fluffy_Risk9955 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The answer to that question is: “Hell no.”
Develop a zero fucks given attitude. Be a bit aloof about whatever is thrown your way. And learn to hold your frame. That’s all you need. Sexual confidence is something that comes after.
[–]theosamabahama -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You need therapy, not prostitutes, buddy.
5-10 prostitutes (it’s kinda cheap here)
That being said, if you can afford it like that, just do it all the time. Or get a sugar baby while you are at it, why not?
What would therapy do? Also it is almost impossible to get here
[–]BlueberryUnlikely475 -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Seriously? 🤢🤮 no sex is worth stds. Find a girl that will like you for who you are. They're just girls. Jesus they don't bite. Well the good ones do. Lol
[–]CocoBabeNYC 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes go and do it.
[–]NorCrypto 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Go Get em tiger!
[–]MistyMaisel 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
How exactly do you think this will help you gain sexual confidence? I'm truly confused what you expect would be gained so if you can explain that better perhaps that would help.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Look. I’m kinda terrified about having sex. If I just have sex with a hooker that I’ll never see again and don’t have to give a fuck about embarrassing myself + probably see that my fear doesn’t have a reason / is irrelevant, it will probably go away.
This is the idea, facing fears by exposure and seeing that it’s nothing to be scared of.
[–]MistyMaisel 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
What are you afraid about in specific when it comes to having sex?
I think being vulnerable, getting rejected in any way or embarrassing myself. Also not knowing what to do or just being bad
[–]MistyMaisel 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ok. Well, then, I'm sorry to say I don't know how sleeping with a woman who is paid to not reject you, embarass you, or tell you that you're a bad lover, or that you don't know what you're doing is going to help you. In no way is sex with a prostitute going to tell you what you need to do for even yourself.
I don't mean that to be harsh, but sex based on mutual attraction and desire and paid sex aren't nearly alike beyond the mechanical. Any confidence you'd gain would be fragile and probably quickly shattered the moment you actually had to have sex with a woman who can have expectations or state her opinion or be disappointed.
[–]TechnoGeek423 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Except what you say makes no sense. You were in a position for sex and then TURNED IT DOWN. I would say sex workers does make sense if you had no opportunities.
If you do, then why pay for it?
Yes but the women I had chances with were women I know and had an emotional connection with or the same group of friends. This is very different from fucking a prostitute you’ll never have to see again
[–]DrinksAreOnTheHouse 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Paying for sex isnt going to make you more confident.
[–]passengerpigeon20 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would say “yes” if you were an ugly Incel, but since you’ve actually turned down sex, you have no problem attracting girls for free, so there’s no reason to use escorts. You might get rejected right before ascension with a normal girl due to size alone, but visiting escorts first isn’t going to solve that problem.
[–]MattPruga 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I had the same issue at first, more so I was afriad I wouldn't know how to do it. Being naked with someone is scary. You just gotta do it, becomes a lot easier after the first time
[–]Comfortable-Rule-854 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No you should not. Having Sex with a prostitute will give you as much confidence as wanking.
I had friends with 30+ loosing their virginity. It's mostly a problem in your own head.
Don't worry about it too much. Do your thing, develop yourself, become comfortable with yourself and the rest will follow. You don't need to be a Greek god or young bull . Just be yourself and don't be needy.
[–]dan_Poland 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would say go for it, would pick women offering GFE experience (if you go to a random hooker there is a decent chance this whole thing will be very "mechanical", purely transactional one and this can actually make your confidence issues worse)
I basically did same thing as you was in kinda similar position 10 years ago or so, one thing I can say from my experience is that it won't "magically" and long run improve your confidence, there are better ways to do it but they need investing time or money (but everyone is different and for you this sort of exposure "therapy" can be good, you are not doing any harm, only small risk of STD but as long as you use protection, don't go down on a hooker chance of getting something serious is low)
[–]farang 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'd say it would depend on the prostitute, you need one with skills and some empathy. If it's legal you may be able to find reviews.
[–]Fapandwarmshowers 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If your really going crazy with frustration then it you get a legal, clean prostitute it shouldnt be so bad, but it wont feel great afterwards
Nothing wrong with that. The only problem I see is if you find a great hooker that fucks your brains out, you’ll expect that as an standard for every woman out there. Remember, they do it for living so you can develop a very costly and in some cases ilegal addiction. So nothing wrong with bust a nut, just be aware of what you are getting into. (Of course there is a risk of desease but many people out there fuck unprotected and could be just as risky, a good sex worker won’t let you fuck her raw)
[–]ArjunVermaReddit 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I think what you need more is an intimacy coach, these could be prostitutes with some maturity (they dont call it experience for nothing) or women who go by that profession. Scope out the prostitutes and see if they're physically attractive enough and capable of helping you feel comfortable or just look for an intimacy coacch directly. I have been where you are. Ive rejected immediate advances and tried delaying them to when Im better but thats because of some bad experiences I had in the past regarding performance anxiety. However Id highly discourage you from focusing on size because thats something you cant fix. I am around 5 inches myself and was given the "its so big" treatment by the girl I was seeing, yes "big dick porn" and even comparison with friends had morphed my body image but you have to think logically about this. When you do do it, just focus on being physically comfortable and dont be shy to take charge
How did you get out of that bad mindset though and finally had sex?
[–]ArjunVermaReddit 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Took a couple of days and my partner was fairly supportive though I just played it off as nervousness. I had to stop watching porn for those few days and kept going at it, I was making out for too long and that was causing me to plauteau out a bit
[–]Thin_Protection5616 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You watch too much porn
Yes I reduced it to a minimum / not at all since 2 weeks now
[–]Thin_Protection5616 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Losers who think they have game and old married men sleep with prostitutes.
Given how you're not an old married man, sleeping with a prostitute will only solidify your self image as the latter
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Wtf you basically didn’t understand a word of my post. I don’t give 2 shits whether the prostitute is ‚interested‘ in me or not.
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Hmm
[–]nosepickergabe 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Make sure they show you paperwork before proceeding.
[–]Composer_Specialist 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don’t do it!! As a 22 year old woman if I’m really feeling a guy his size doesn’t matter to me. The connection is what matters the most. In the meantime Type in small penis porn and watch your insecurities disappear
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