Girls With Boyfriends

urfaselol · 2011-12-25T01:38:22+00:00

if she has a boyfriend then she has a boyfriend. even if she doesn't have a boyfriend, that means she's not interested. Just move on

ajcook921 · 2011-12-25T09:48:56+00:00

The monkey swinging through the jungle doesn't let go of a vine until it has firm grasp of the next vine. This statement might be a little mean sounding, but it illustrates my point. A lot of women won't bail out of a relationship unless they have something else lined up. They like having the safety and security of knowing they're going to be taken care of. We've all seen really desirable women that are only on the market for a couple weeks between relationships. More often than not, the new guy was already lined up BEFORE the breakup. That two week period was just a token wait time for social image reasons. A lot of women you're going to have to pluck away from their current man if you want to have them.

Here are the spoken-for women that I consider most likely to get out of a current relationship or at least hookup.

1) She's at a club/bar minus her man. This act alone speaks volumes. Girls will blast me for this statement saying otherwise, but I stand by it.

2) She's on a business trip or vacation minus her man. If she can break away from her social circle and the judgment of her peers in her hometown, she's much more likely to explore other options as she doesn't have to deal with the social fallout she would back home.

3) She starts doing things to improve herself minus her man. She starts taking classes, getting fit at the gym, joining clubs and activities, etc. People in general are lazy by nature. If they're content in a relationship, they tend to do nothing and hold the course steady. When she puts forth this kind of effort out of the blue, something isn't sitting right on the home-front.

4) Women that have a history of cheating. Not girlfriend material as she's gonna end up cheating on you too. But if you're looking for a hookup don't count her out.

glassuser · 2011-12-25T06:08:25+00:00

I already have enough bite marks on my ass from karma. I don't need any more.

BeefyBeefy · 2011-12-25T11:18:48+00:00

I refrained from posting my view, but I think it's time that everyone face the truth.

The truth is, it hurts to be the guy who gets cheated on/dumped. But that's life. Women reward alpha male behavior.

If you're a self-actualized, worthwhile guy... 1) Your girl probably won't cheat on you 2) Even if she does, you're better off without her & you can let go of the past, even if it isn't what you may have wanted.

That being said, I argue that isn't immoral to go after a girl with a bf. I however do think that there is a judgment call to be made; you shouldn't take something like this lightly. At the end of the day, she better be worth your time and you better be prepared to face any consequences that come your way because of your actions.

And I don't want to argue over the definition of what it means to be moral. I just think it's not wrong to go after a girl with a boyfriend. period.

gigashadowwolf · 2011-12-25T19:37:54+00:00

First off I am inclined to agree with urfaselol if she says she has a boyfriend I'm done. I wont back off immediately I'll say something dismissive like "good for you", "cool", or "me too!". I continue to talk to her until I am getting bored of the conversation, then I leave and do not pursue. This allows me to keep state, if I just leave I begin to focus on the goal of pulling and it trips me up. Occasionally I have gotten girls to find me later, they wont admit they don't have a boyfriend but they will try to qualify it. "It's long distance" or "it's not working out right now". Now THIS is the shit, test. Figure out your own response.

In terms of whether I'm looking for a girlfriend or to get laid, the answer is neither. I am too in the moment to focus on either. I am open to the possibility of a girlfriend though if I end up liking her that much.

ShowcasePUA · 2011-12-25T04:45:23+00:00

Great post. I ran into this same issue recently when a girl was at a bar with her boyfriend. She kept sending me IOI's, but I understood that I wasn't in a position to do anything about it without being immediately declined.

I say if the boyfriend is there and it's obvious that the two of them are happy together, don't shit on them. But if the same girl were to talk to me next week with the whole "my boyfriend is suuuuuuch a douche!" spiel while he wasn't there, I know it's on like donkey kong. Like a lot of the guys here have already said, the girl just wants an easy out a relationship that she's not emotionally involved in anymore.

2011-12-25T05:12:32+00:00

Op, what you ask differs due to the persons nature. I don't care, but if a girl really likes a guy its gonna be harder. If its already on shakey ground ill go for it. I fucked up trying to get a girl by telling her to break up, but it was due to morals since I could have fucked her and had her cheat and to inexperience.

Some girls are gf material, but most aren't. Girls and guys have a lower standard of people they would hook up with rather than date and marry.

oswaggy · 2011-12-25T03:43:11+00:00

Hitting on girls that have boyfriends is just flat-out retarded. Nothing good can come of it.

MDCisgoodforme · 2011-12-25T03:22:52+00:00

So just forget all the regrets that keep haunting you. They aren't worth your time.

MonkeySteriods · 2011-12-26T04:27:57+00:00

I side with 30van.. I draw the line at committed relationships and married people. I'd rather not burn the karma for a married woman. However if I meet a girl that has a bf and is interested in cheating or leaving I couldn't care less. Women cheat all the time, its not a male only behavior. That being said, if the girl is extremely interested and cant stop reminiscing about here bf thats a no go.

Bletz · 2011-12-26T05:51:52+00:00

If I like the girl, game on.

MrFlufflesworth · 2011-12-26T15:01:32+00:00

Girls with boyfriends are easy! You only have to be better than one guy instead of the entire realm of possibility

PenisChrist · 2011-12-25T03:57:16+00:00

It's a scumbag move, and not at all how I roll. So I don't do it, even if I think I could get away with it.

calvinvshobbes · 2011-12-25T03:44:09+00:00

I've run into this moral ground before. Women are looking for the next jump if they really do want to leave their current relationship. But you don't know that in the beginning. so hen what if you do know this girl is in a disfunctional relationship? Is it then more ethical?

shiftingsands · 2011-12-25T07:16:53+00:00

Some of the best girls I've been with I had first befriended when they had boyfriends. There's no harm in making friends, unless you end up getting totally hung up on the girl.

2011-12-27T10:08:14+00:00

Morality has nothing to do with this. You have the right to be interested in a girl. A boyfriend does not take that right away. You can and should keep persisting. If she favors you, she leaves the boyfriend for you. If she favors the boyfriend, she stays with him. Either way, her happiness is maximized.

By not persisting, you do not ensure that the total happiness for all parties involved is maximized. If a girl is in a relationship with a guy she isn't fond of, she is not happy. By not persisting, you do not get her and you are not happy. Her boyfriend may or may not be happy, resulting in at most 1/3 people being happy. By persisting, if you get the girl, then the girl is happy, you are happy, and the boyfriend may or may not be happy (likely the latter), but you know at least 2/3 people are happy.

Life is so much easier when you apply free market principles to social situations.

nuckingFutz · 2011-12-25T04:23:42+00:00

If a girl begrudgingly admits she has a boyfriend but is still into you, go for it. It's likely she wants an out but needs validation that she's still attractive. You're saving both of them a lot of pain and anxiety by giving her a way to cut it off early.

DesignMyself · 2011-12-25T01:47:01+00:00

I'm really conflicted about this, but my actions say otherwise. I don't like hooking up with a girl who has a boyfriend. So, I don't pursue one for anything more than casual sex and friendship. I feel I can't trust her, but girls with boyfriends seem to really like me. Maybe it's because I appear very nice and they somehow feel that it's not really cheating then or they convince themselves that when they decide to spend time alone with me, it's not obviously just for sex. I don't know.

Hooking up with a girl who has a boyfriend is likely causing trouble for her boyfriend and her. Though sometimes, people are just waiting to cross that line and end a relationship in that cowardly spectacular way.

One girl cheated with me. We fell in love. She cheated on me. It hurt like hell and I told myself I'd never have a girl cheat with me again, but I did.

Anates · 2011-12-25T09:53:12+00:00

Dating is like soccer..

Just because there's a goalie doesn't mean you can't score.

DavidMagnum · 2011-12-27T06:50:40+00:00

If you're looking to just hook up, a girl with a boyfriend is great. No need to go out in public or date, obviously she can't be seen with you. It's her decision to make. At the end of the day it's just a boyfriend. Personally, it would be different if she were married, with children, or lived together. It's just a boyfriend, and she obviously isn't serious enough to NOT cheat. I don't understand why it's considered "scumbag" move, she's the one cheating not me. If my girlfriend cheated on me I would break up with her and move on just fine, and couldn't care less about the guy she cheated with.

alphaChompy · 2011-12-26T04:30:34+00:00

ask them to rank the boyfriend on a scale of 1 to 10. If they hesitate, tease them about it. If they don't, then you can gracefully take your exit.

30vanquish · 2011-12-25T01:41:41+00:00

Every person has their own set of morals when it comes to boyfriends. It's your decision.

Personally, I continue the conversation with a joke, "Wow, you're telling me about your problems already?" Then continue talking, flirting, etc. for making a friend/practicing. Keep things good so you could hit up her hot friend if she has one.

If the girl is way too hot and you have to try, ask her about her boyfriend situation. If she says it's "okay..." then you need to show her an amazing time. Give her a reason to dump him and pick you instead. Do the same tactics as usual.

urfaselol · 2011-12-25T01:43:18+00:00

[permanently deleted]

kokeen19 · 2011-12-26T20:10:00+00:00

In this day and age people don't value relationships like they used to sad to say. it's not like they're being tricked into cheating or leaving their man.some women are looking for an adventure and others a new relationship. life is not perfect

bcktth · 2011-12-25T19:32:26+00:00

Karma, karma, karma.

edit: Real life karma, not reddit karma.

mctheebs · 2011-12-25T07:22:12+00:00

there's glass on the floor, and my knuckles are bloody from punching the wall. when I am done with food, instead of taking it to the kitchen, i throw the leftovers into the corner of my room. the entire place, obviously, is trashed. we all grow up and watch the tv shows. we see people doing great things for the world and we promise to ourselves that when we grow up, we will be like them. and we see the druggies destroying their lives and everyone's around them, and we promise that we wont be like that. but i've lost my inner battle. there is so much that I could have been. but instead, i am purposely tearing apart my life, pushing friends away, locking myself in my house, and throwing it all away. why? because fuck you. that's why. there is no one in this world who i care about. i don't even care about myself. i didn't choose to be born. but i was. and my whole life has been a torture. but you missed something. you didn't expect that I woudl like it. yes when you beat me, at first I cried, but then I started to like it. When you threw me out, at first I was cold and wanted someone to hld me, but now i like it. WHY DO I LIKE IT> BECAUSE FUCK YOU. my blood flowing down my wrist feels good. the broken glass on teh floor feels good. the strange juxtaposition of relaxing music, and the calm descent into insanity feels good. there is no god, but if I could make you go to hell by selling my soul to satan then i would.

KylenolForKids · 2011-12-25T04:22:13+00:00

You: "Hey, did you have a goldfish growing up?"

Her: any answer

You: "Now I know two things about you that make absolutely no difference to me"

Note: Field tested and works 10% of the time, every time

Title	Girls With Boyfriends
Author	mctheebs
Upvotes	44
Comments	59
Date	December 24, 2011 8:49 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/npgdg/girls_with_boyfriends/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/girls-with-boyfriends.1326130 https://theredarchive.com/post/1326130

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