How I Developed Awesome Self Confidence

austenc · 2011-06-06T18:34:50+00:00

In the words of the late Bob Ross, 'happy mistakes'..... and then we'll just make some happy little trees over here.

edubation · 2011-06-06T21:49:43+00:00

I just remind myself I'll be dead in a few decades, and that in a thousand years, my matter will have been consumed many times over.

szukai · 2011-06-06T19:20:53+00:00

Rejection Therapy stuff is pretty cool and relates to this. Its fun and helps a lot.

recentlyUnchurched · 2011-06-06T18:01:30+00:00

This is a pretty good approach. Sometimes when i'm getting up the nerve to go over and talk to a girl, my mind fills up with potential things and counters things im going to say. Then i become overwhelmed and just keep on walking. Forcing yourself into awkward situations seems ideal, almost like training with a medicine ball and then going to a regular one. It always seems harder than it really is...

telegraph_it · 2011-06-06T22:41:51+00:00

Talk to people and intentionally sabotage yourself from time to time. Just to get used to the feeling and the rush of being put on the spot.

I like this. People generally find me funny and my humor is mostly sarcasm. I will say things that put me on the spot to see how people will react. Some laugh because they know I'm not being serious and the ones who are shocked make the comment even funnier for everyone.

Majestixx · 2011-06-07T01:42:10+00:00

This reminds me of one of my favorite moments in the Blue Print Decoded. Tyler goes I'm more likely to approach someone and mess it up than not approach them at all. As a demo he goes 'Cool I'm going to talk to them.... Hmm can't think of anything to say.. Well this is going to be awkward :P' then he walks over.

elmcityalpha · 2011-06-06T20:07:13+00:00

This is definitely the right frame of mind. The more that you treat social situations like not a big deal, the easier it gets.

geenomike · 2011-06-06T23:05:23+00:00

I believe Parliament summed this up by "free your mind and your ass will follow".

chosonhawk · 2011-06-07T00:05:03+00:00

tldr: nobody's perfect :)

abacaba · 2011-06-07T03:40:57+00:00

Unfortunately, I get quite down on myself when I make the same mistake multiple times. It becomes harder to believe in the value of mistakes when it doesn't help prevent you from making the same mistake again.

brendanfromboston · 2011-06-06T23:17:14+00:00

Excellent advice!

gvr427 · 2011-06-07T04:24:11+00:00

I try and use this same approach. If it works out great, if not, at least I have a good/funny story about it to tell to my friends.

RcskaSedd · 2011-06-07T04:38:04+00:00

haha i do something similiar but what you speak is the truth. Sometimes my mistakes bug me a little. Like 20 minutes ago i just got off the phone with a girl. She's been giving me some cold responses lately so i talked to her to see what is up. During the conversation i told her to give me negative feed back, and she told me that she likes the way i hit on her but she see's me as easy to take advantage off (this might be true, i am very nice to everyone but i am not that nice. I have not given anyone anything.) so i felt i started validating myself by telling her that I'm a person who only gets mad when someone really offends me (because I've been though on here to avoid fights with AMOG, unless he's destroy everything you believe in.) so i start telling her how i would only get mad if someone makes me mad. What i was trying to do is connect with her. I felt like a fucked up. But going out to mess up with girls on purpose is great. i need to do that more to learn. Also Women does care so much if you make mistakes, you gotta love yourself for making the mistakes.

peter_nin_com_poop · 2011-06-07T06:22:42+00:00

I honestly appreciate the considerate knowledge you are passing on to all of us, I really do. However, your input is somewhat vague. You claim you are able to recover easily, could you elaborate please? I have been involved in a several social situations that may have put a bad rap/view on my personal image in front of close friends/groups of friends of mine and recovering from that wasn't all that easy. Unless, you are on the level of not giving a FUCK? I say that in way because I know people who are have mass confidence because they don't give a shit about the consequences. Maybe they know they can rebound from bad situations? I'm not really sure I guess. Where's the gain in confidence here? What if you get consistent negative feedback? I look at confidence as bubble instead of stepping stairs in life. I'm open to the criticism cause I'm pretty critical of the idea of confidence since it's clearly an issue for myself. Thanks in advance.

inc_mplete · 2011-06-07T14:29:59+00:00

i concur... just laugh at your mistakes and learn from them don't take it to heart and confidence will grow :)

maxd · 2011-06-07T07:19:11+00:00

This just about sums up my outlook on life.

RedPosterboard · 2011-06-07T11:11:51+00:00

... or if and when you fuck up, instead of talking down on yourself, tell yourself how fucking awesome it is to be you! "Haha, I'm great, man!" :P

blotner · 2011-06-07T01:47:11+00:00

You make me feel happy :)

TheLotusEater · 2011-06-06T22:19:54+00:00

you're a beta male I can tell, you don't have confidence and you don't have many women in your life.

edit: was testing the OP. he didn't bite. I just haven't seen anybody in my own life completely change confidence levels without an external factor (finally got a hot girlfriend, money, major accomplishment, etc.) so I'm always skeptical when people on the internet say they have.

Title	How I Developed Awesome Self Confidence
Author	TheLotusEater
Upvotes	124
Comments	56
Date	June 6, 2011 5:40 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ht00a/how_i_developed_awesome_self_confidence/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-i-developed-awesome-self-confidence.1319024 https://theredarchive.com/post/1319024

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