How to stop getting hung up on openers

shittybillz · 2024-09-06T14:52:39+00:00

Openers are basically useless. Do you want to come off as saying something scripted? No. It's the same with sales; do you want your prospect to know you're reading off a script? Of course not.

Come in genuinely and say whatever you want. Only thing I'd recommend is not immediately praising her good looks. Make a comment on the venue, or just straight up say "Hi my name is Bigboy and I wanted to talk to you".

If you have ANY shot with her, she will make it a little easier for you. It should be a natural conversation. If you find she is giving you one word answers, she's not interested and a good opener wasn't going to save you.

Western-Month-3877 · 2024-09-06T16:00:12+00:00

A memorized or scripted opener is basically just like how you learn how to hold a ball in basketball. It is basic and fundamental but it’s just a fraction part of the whole game.

If you want to have a flowing conversation then you need to dribble a ball, then to dribble it when an opponent trying to block you. Or to pass the ball when you are your friend’s wingman. And so on.

You want to dribble “a conversation”? Then learn how to read its pattern. Every good conversation has patterns you can learn and follow. It’s not as random as some thought.

epimpstyle · 2024-09-06T18:28:35+00:00

If you have a good opener it will make things easier for you, if you have some canned openers it should be no problem to say one or if it is somehow difficult to decide which is the best then just learn a single opener and use that single opener. When I started doing this, 5 years ago, I learned some openers and I used them, I never had the problem of thinking which one is the best, no way! Such openers are perfect in the beginning until you come up with your own openers.

Approaching a girl is not just saying an opener, it is actually opener + transition + giving her a topic to talk about, if you just stop after OPENER you will have a hard time.

DaygameCode · 2024-09-06T23:46:44+00:00

If you are planning to approach women you need to walk up to them having the absolute conviction that you are gonna make their day or that at the very least you are gonna make your own day by daring to approach them.

If you don’t have that conviction then you will be looking for signals from them that what you are doing is ok, and at the minimum signal that seems like they are not ok with it even before you try to speak then you will stop yourself.

So you need to brainwash yourself into thinking what i am doing is desirable no matter what and to help with that you also should approach by simply giving her a reason as to why you want to be to know her and asking for permission to get to know her. That at least shows politeness and you don’t have to guess if she wants to or not because you are already getting that consent from her.

As for approach anxiety, your anxiety in your head needs to know what your game plan is in case something goes wrong, and ideally she also needs to know how are you gonna prevent something from going wrong.

Your anxiety probably beliefs that girls will react negatively to your approach why? Because it assumes women didn’t give you permission or that you are bothering them or that you are gonna creep them out,…

So what you need to think is ok “how do i make sure my approach is respectful and consensual”, how do i make sure that i’m not doing anything that could be considered creepy during my approach” and so on.

You also need to challenge your beliefs, because if you have a core belief like “approaching strangers is wrong and unwanted no matter what” then you are basically going against your own self-concept which creates internal conflicts in your mind.

“I am a person who follows social norms, and i believe that approaching strangers goes against social norms, therefore if i did that, i would maybe be look down by her or by other people

Lonely-Internet-601 · 2024-09-06T13:51:15+00:00

I have one generic opener which I use regardless of the situation, the advantage of this is that its one less thing to worry about if you dont have to think of something on the spot. The words of you're opener arent that important anyway so one opener is as good as the next. If you're interested my opener is.

Excuse me are you originally from (name of current city). Then when she replies I say, Ok I just noticed you standing here and I was curious where you were from.

You can use this almost anywhere, I've opened girls in clubs with this, you can use it in day game, its pretty generic.

Miserable-Swing9275 · 2024-09-10T02:20:00+00:00

As with anything else in life you have to get your reps in

berzerker5000 · 2024-09-06T13:03:53+00:00

Focus on making a real connection because something interests you about this person rather than openers. Remove the pressure from yourself for awhile to do pick up by changing your goal. Then when you are more comfortable interacting; add pu techniques. You have the whole thing in your mind as too much of a big deal so need to get past that. Start being more social with everyone so you get into a new flow.

dodalou · 2024-09-06T13:59:55+00:00

You have to stop thinking. Like all together. You can’t be in the moment when you’re thinking.

miyass_miyass · 2024-09-06T14:49:13+00:00

Yes you've discovered why canned and generic openers are vital, despite what all the "natural game" purists will tell you

I walk close by and try and make eye contact

Don't do this. If you want to approach just approach, forget about all these eye contact games.

offinthewoods10 · 2024-09-06T15:16:13+00:00

Making comments on things that are happening around you makes it a lot easier. Having a shared experience and showing off your sense of humor as well will typically get the interaction off to a great start.

Turn it into a little inside joke between the two of you. Once you’ve started it’s much easier.

carlos11111111112 · 2024-09-06T15:31:22+00:00

Take massive action

Global-Anteater-4019 · 2024-09-06T16:31:07+00:00

Have a standerd line you can use in any situation. Keep it simple, something like hi who are you is fine. It's how you keep the Convo going after that. The opener is the least important part of the game. No woman will have sex with you just from the first thing you say.

Fantastic-Life-2024 · 2024-09-06T20:51:23+00:00

Just go out to the mall and observe each woman. Look at her and think of something you could work with.

SithLordJediMaster · 2024-09-06T21:36:20+00:00

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/46/68/03/4668038395414e0f022fb43c17f53e8f.jpg

Affectionate-Ant4888 · 2024-09-07T08:41:40+00:00

the best openers are from Ross Jeffries, and neil strauss also teaches, rehearse the opener several times write it on cheat sheet and so on, practice makes perfect,

one that I listened to him but haven't used yet goes like this:

Hi , I just realized if I don't say hi I might never see you again, nice to meet you, my name is X,
being direct is the best shit state your intentions, the only reason you are talking to her is because you want to put her legs behind her ears, so act like it, anyway that's what he teaches lol, there are some others, but damn, the seminars of Ross Jeffries are the best stuff for this hands down.

Title	How to stop getting hung up on openers
Author	Bigboy7252
Upvotes	2
Comments	31
Date	September 6, 2024 12:03 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1fadg7y/how_to_stop_getting_hung_up_on_openers/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-stop-getting-hung-up-on-openers.1529578 https://theredarchive.com/post/1529578

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