Is it bad to be too friendly?

CompetitionFair7686 · 2022-03-13T12:36:52+00:00

You are not supposed to act friendly in a date, it’s a date.

You are supposed to act like a lover, make it man to woman, act like a more sexual person, more touchy, tease her, provoke her,… Build tension, and break it, build the tension again, and break it again, and so on…

You are not there to give her advice or to listen to her problems, or to be her shoulder to cry on, or to be her therapist.

You are there to play, to flirt and build sexual tension, to be intimate, and to insinuate your desire for the girl.

If your conversation with a girl in a date isn’t much different from a conversation you would have with your male friend or your sister them, you are doing it wrong.

tcheeset · 2022-03-13T11:41:37+00:00

I honestly wish I could give you an answer, but I fear I may have the same problem. Honestly though, we should be ourselves. Because if you’re naturally nice, it would be better for someone you find to be attracted to who you really are. If they don’t like you being kind, then they might just not be right for you.

ohropax · 2022-03-13T11:44:52+00:00

the question is are you persistent and are you actually trying to pull the girl to your apartment.

I often wonder if behind a lot of those stories of being too friendly is just guys not escalating or not pullung or not being persistent.

If you go for the pull and are somewhat persistent, especially on the first date, she probably wont perceive you as a nice guy anyways.

nojremark · 2022-03-13T13:25:26+00:00

I believe in managing expectations. If I am interested in a woman. I make sure she knows that I am excluding myself from the friend zone. I'm too old and too important to myself for ambiguity about what I want.

norwegiandoggo · 2022-03-13T11:59:35+00:00

There are certain behaviors that are associated with friendship, and other behaviors that are more associated with lovers / romance / sex. There is some overlap, but if you only act like a friend it will lead you to the friendzone.

mightymite88 · 2022-03-13T12:21:43+00:00

No , you can be extremely friendly as long as you signal your intent. But that's gotta be a first step, and an ongoing reminder. You are not her friend, you are a potential lover

You dont need to be brash. You need to be honest and communicate.

freespirit1963TJ · 2022-03-13T17:34:06+00:00

Too friendly comes off very superficial to a lot of people, even annoying. I used to work at a place where I had to start work at 345 AM. We had to park a distance from the building and ride a shuttle. So we are all in the shuttle with this dude who is, Mr. Happy, Mr. Friendly and Chatty Cathy all wrapped in one. Nobody is that friendly or happy, unless they're medicated. 🤮🤢

Calamity__Bane · 2022-03-13T16:19:06+00:00

Yes, it is bad to be too friendly. There are times when you want to be challenging and conflictual, and times when you want to be a little bit cold.

As far as not knowing how flirtatious you can be, the only way to know is to flirt and see how she responds. Trying to think your way into making the right moves never works, only the way things behave in reality can tell you what the right moves are.

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-03-13T12:14:02+00:00

The only person who can put you in the friendzone is yourself. It means you are not showing up as a man and are not being true to your nature as a man.

GLight3 · 2022-03-13T16:52:41+00:00

Being too friendly prevents sexual tension from building up. Tension is good. Resolving it instantly with friendliness instead of leaning into it is an effective way to kill sexual attraction. This is why teasing is such a common flirting technique.

2022-03-13T16:21:13+00:00

Advice ITT is just trash

Yes, it is mostly certainly a bad thing to be too friendly. They can't truly appreciate the good vibes if they never experience the bad ones.

NineteenAD9 · 2022-03-13T14:17:38+00:00

It's possible to be friendly and still approach dates in the way you need to romantically for women to become interested in you. There's a grey area you have to live in.

Being friendly doesn't necessarily mean being overly nice or something. Think of it as being social. A lot of times, the most friendly people are the most social people in the room. They can converse with damn near anyone and keep a conversation alive in different ways. That's how you should view friendliness.

You just have to mix in the right vibes on top of that.

Chicagoj1563 · 2022-03-13T15:59:39+00:00

Friendly is ok. Too friendly is not. You have to ask yourself, are you attracted to this girl? Do you see her as a potential sex partner? Then why are you being so friendly? Why aren't you conveying some of those other thoughts? Are you trying to hide something? Is all this being nice just an act to get something from her?

I realize you probably don't think of your intentions like I described, but the girl can get those vibes if you're too nice. You need to convey that you are a sex worthy man, your intentions are good, you like sex, and conveying these things to her is totally normal for you. Not saying you need to be an overbearing weirdo that creeps her out. But, you need to show her you are a sexual man, not another one of her girlfriends or male orbiters.

jaafarbht · 2022-03-13T18:12:41+00:00

your intent should be clear from the 1st time you guys met, not in the date itself. The context of the date is also important, paint some context around the date, why are you guys meeting up? why are you making time for her? This should be clear from your interaction and in your texting and the date request. if your intent is clear from the 1st square then you won't fall into the trap of the friendzone, because she can either accept that intent or reject it, and in both cases you can't fall into the friendzone. But if the problem is that you're not interested because you are "good looking" I didn't understand that point to be honest but if that's the problem, find a hotter girl, a girl which you find interesting and don't settle for less.

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2022-03-13T19:02:38+00:00

How do I show a girl that I find her really interesting and attractive

Escalate kino.

Her guy friend don't touch her. Her lovers do. Your approach to physicality tells her which category you want to be in.

incognito3107 · 2022-03-13T20:26:14+00:00

By escalating touch and not getting into emotionless conversations or activities. You need to aim for sincere feelings and natural chemistry, not some artificial formulas of good behaviour.

bestmenrmenatbest · 2022-03-13T21:06:01+00:00

Act like you don’t want anything, and you get everything. Being too friendly sends off neediness, the opposite of what you want. You want to be cold, but charming. Plus don’t be too available, or reveal anything about yourself. Its about her not you. Essentially, act like it wouldn’t make a difference to you if she left or stayed, and stop trying to win them over. You are better remember that

No_Acanthisitta5052 · 2022-03-14T01:33:15+00:00

Be a man.

Have the psychology of a man, and not that of a timid pickle. Our past is brutal enough, literally if you read of our genomics. A lot of women prefer a well-built man that does not require her care-taking. This reflects in their preferences for a certain psychological archetype.

You can ignore it, but it will be like ignoring her preferences for well-built men. It makes you less effective. You can go for a frenchman style, that it sway and polite, but hot and a little crazy. Hawaiian style seems quite effective as well, and rather pleasant, but not to the point where one self-disrespect and degrade. I don’t know how effective the American jockey is, people are rather nonchalant where I am from. I can’t believe it is highly effective, they seem way to pushy and brute.

There are multiple archetypes that work. Just do not be a soyboy, or behave like insecure pickles. Do not want to remind them of insecure boys.

Title	Is it bad to be too friendly?
Author	DarkFite
Upvotes	14
Comments	28
Date	March 13, 2022 11:32 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/td52ow/is_it_bad_to_be_too_friendly/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/is-it-bad-to-be-too-friendly.1264704 https://theredarchive.com/post/1264704

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