Should Autistic Men Not Even Try?

mmmm_frietjes · 2024-11-28T21:38:09+00:00

Silicon Valley is filled with autistic men with successful companies / careers and a nice wife. So no. The evidence refutes your post.

CauseDue1279 · 2024-11-28T21:36:25+00:00

I feel you completely, I'm also a neurodivergent with BP1. It's not easy. We don't have the best cards given to us.

cqt88 · 2024-11-28T21:38:40+00:00

agrred as a 37yo autistic virgin i have thought about killing myself honestly

Professional_Local15 · 2024-11-28T21:52:27+00:00

I am 41m undiagnosed but pretty sure I’m high functioning autistic. I seem to have unintentionally had success with single moms with autistic sons. It seems like they’re more used to a personality like mine.

chobolicious88 · 2024-11-28T21:39:10+00:00

Totally get you.

Interesting observation ive seen - quality men will pick autistic women because they get to be protective of them. Autistic men tend to get accepted by street or hood (masculine) women which tends to end up in the woman abusing the man verbally/emotionally because she is protecting him.

I think the only hope is sensitive/anxious/nerdy girls.

Single-Fault-8772 · 2024-11-28T22:10:13+00:00

NGL, I have to ask,where have you got these opinions from? My exes have both been on the spectrum and honestly they're "autistic traits" are what made me crush on them.I find those traits endearing, so you're wrong lol

LovelyRoseBoop · 2024-11-28T22:46:39+00:00

I'm a woman who has dated or hooked up with at least four autistic men. Admittedly they were all extremely attractive. But the directness in the autism was attractive and masculine to me. I was interested in having children with one but he wasn't.

tehjoch · 2024-11-28T22:56:47+00:00

Man. Your beliefs are quite extreme. Sorry if you are a woman that dislikes autistic men. We will find other women, no problem

IncognitoBudz · 2024-11-28T23:06:35+00:00

I'm autistic? Had a girl approach me at the gym an hour ago for a plate it wasn't about the plate there's like 20 of the exact one.

Autism has nothing to do with it, if you're semi attractive and have a fit athletic body the cards will stack in your favour sooner or later.

The first step is treating women as people, regular people. Act as if they're guys if it helps you.

The second is going out of your own way to compliment or start conversations with people, male or female it works all the same IMO. If you can start a conversation and you're semi attractive and the other person finds you attractive it's all it really takes.

Women are attracted to men of all shapes sizes and colour, it's just about being comfortable in your own skin :)

I've seen some not so great looking guys date absolute dolls, they were dopey guys usually and didn't care for how they looked much but they owned who they were.

You don't have to approach people everyday but if you make it a habit eventually you'll meet some new people, it's hard but life with good friends and loved ones makes it so much more worth while!

shooteen · 2024-11-28T22:10:33+00:00

Autistic men are not unable to get a job and make money. You are projecting, not a good idea

SnooHesitations4922 · 2024-11-28T22:23:49+00:00

You do know always trying to be socially "correct" or trying to display perfect social skills is a turn off for women, right?

Women don't like try hards. For this reason, u can twist autism into an advantage.

Your problem is you see autism as weakness and overcompensate and get stuck in struggle energy. You want to give off "life is easy" energy. You don't have to be neurotypical for that...play into autism and speak nonsense...girls think it's cuter and funnier than saying the "right" things.

MyUsername0_0 · 2024-11-28T22:31:46+00:00

RSD Tyler or Owen Cook has Asperger’s or autism and he was able to get girls so I’m sure if you are functional you can learn to read social cues and things like that

reeling_in_the_fear · 2024-11-28T22:15:03+00:00

I think there's a threshold.

I'm a bit spergy and certainly show some of the symptoms, and have managed to be pretty successful with women.

I was always a bit odd growing up, never got anywhere with women, experienced my fair share of social rejection etc. but I never really tried to do anything about it. At some point I realised that social skills are trainable, and social skills + game became a huge autismo hyperfocus if mine.

In some ways I felt handicapped because I had to learn EVERYTHING "manually", many of my friends I'd talk with would tell me stuff they do and I'd be able to frame it all in terms of technical game I'd learned, while for them it was just natural. By the same token though, I've never felt stuck - the learning process can take you as far as you want to go, so having to do things the long and slow way can pay off in that way.

So, my sense is that a guy who's a BIT autistic can actually do really really well if he makes game a hyperfocus and gets obsessed, but there is probably a threshold past which it's going to be really hard for an autistic person to learn NT social games. For those guys, yeah, rip, that sucks.

But for the guys who are just a bit spergy and awkward.. give it a proper try. That autistic brain of yours can do amazing things when it gets properly obsessed. I started hyperfocusing on this stuff just over a year ago and in that time I've tripled my lifetime bodycount and currently have 3 solid FWB setups plus more girls in the pipeline all the time

roth_on · 2024-11-28T22:02:06+00:00

Autistic men may tend to differ in some of the qualities typically being attractive to women. Self confidence, money, social fluency. As you write.

You say it's a barrier. I think you're 100% correct. But remember that there are more to in life than that, and some women value other things more. The qualities you have should be you're front window when dating. I don't know what they are. But just the text you just wrote inclines that you're a reflecting and empathetic man. Being vulnerable about your diagnosis can be extremely attractive if played right. I'm sure there are more things.

SemiprescientSapien · 2024-11-28T22:24:45+00:00

You have a big brain, 🧠

make it work for you by reading up on Practical female psychology : for the practical man by David Clare and Joseph W. South.

Learning this stuff is easy, it's the unlearning of what we think SHOULD work that's gonna make it super hard.

It's a process thing so take your time.

You can do it 💪

HereForaRefund · 2024-11-28T23:23:25+00:00

Autistic people are the whole reason pickup even started. Women bash it so hard, but don't even get the point. You're not misogynistic because you want to learn to be more social and find someone to love.

No-Preference8767 · 2024-11-28T23:46:24+00:00

You sound like you have a debilitating form of autism which is well , debilitating

Yes. You should give up on dating in the normal sense. You can find women in autism support groups or autism group homes but I wouldnt expect to find a partner through traditional methods .

Focus on possibly getting better every year and doing less and less with assistance. Don't give up on easing the burden of your caretakers over time.

If you can get your hygiene to a decent standard and you can hold down a job then I would consider the traditional route. Until then focus on yourself

asanskrita · 2024-11-29T05:01:22+00:00

I couldn’t really talk to women in my teens and 20s. I had women literally drag me to bed and I was so anxious I didn’t know how to act. I was a deeply autistic young man who did nonetheless attract women. Apparently I’m good looking. I did not realize any of this till later in life. I’ve learned social skills. I’ve spent time in therapy. I still struggle with some things but I’ve also had some great sex. Honestly my relationships have been less great, I was easily taken advantage of on the one hand and had trouble with emotional regulation on the other. I’ve also worked through a lot of that.

You have two courses you can take. Shrug and give up and be miserable, or keep trying and be miserable. The difference is that with repeated and sincere effort you will actually change and get better, if only bit by bit.

BlackPhillip444 · 2024-12-06T11:23:39+00:00

1 in 100 people are autistic. Some of them include Bill Gates, Anthony Hopkins, Charles Darwin, Mark Zuckerberg, Elon Musk, Jack septic eye, Dan Akyroyd, some even think Hugh Hefner (yes, hugh hefner) might have had it.

I most likely have it myself, though I don't really care anymore tbh. Had maybe 2-ish girlfriends in the past, I was an absolute shut in as a teenager. The third was a BPD psychopath who ruined my life and nearly made me unalive. They prey on people with personality disorders and other mental health problems anyway. Since then, I haven't tried and I've solely focused on my own personal well-being, mental health, finances, etc. Ironically though, this has got me more attention from women than I ever thought (and of course, more attention from Cluster B psychos as well).

Why? You're autistic so you can use that brain of yours to tell me. I'll tell you anyway, stop caring. Neurotypicals have a drive to be social. You don't. You can handle being alone. You don't feel pressure to conform to made up societal nonsense that barely matters in the end. You know how many older dudes in bars you can strike up a convo with and go "Damn I hate my wife" or "my ex wife was a cheater and dumped me." They get themselves trapped in these situations and their whole lives are ruined. By the time theyre 40 and stop partying the reality sets in, and they realize they're yet another worker bee. Just do you dude.

H8beingmale · 2024-12-19T21:02:02+00:00

men on the asd spectrum do seem to have a right rate of becoming wizards

Fast-Expert-9799 · 2024-11-30T08:11:50+00:00

I have been diagnosed with Asperger's, but I don't think it's that severe.

Social anxiety was the main thing that stopped me from approaching due to some teenage negative experiences.

However, I have been approaching since 2018 and not got a date.

Recently, I have been unemployed so I have been back on the daygame and collected 5 numbers, all of which have flaked.

I have done well to have the interaction and get the number, so I can only think it's due to Asperger's that they have flaked.

It normally takes me 20 approaches to get a number and the city where I daygame is small and I also like to avoid approaching underaged so I can't just tear about the streets with reckless abandon.

So obviously, it is disappointing that the phone numbers that I have got flaked out. And maybe the reason is because of my Asperger's.

Title	Should Autistic Men Not Even Try?
Author	MentalCelOmega
Upvotes	0
Comments	60
Date	November 28, 2024 9:33 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1h26aoa/should_autistic_men_not_even_try/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/should-autistic-men-not-even-try.1537131 https://theredarchive.com/post/1537131

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