Why do people here recommend going out over online dating?

boobysnot · 2021-09-20T09:12:53+00:00

You can "match" with any girl in real life, and You have a chance to talk to anyone, even a 10/10 instagram model who gets 500 matches a day on tinder. And she would be happy that You made a move in real life. Girls prefer it that way.

jsbach123 · 2021-09-20T11:12:03+00:00

The reason online dating sucks for men is, it's hard for men to convey their attractive qualities on a dating profile. What makes a man attractive is his sense of confidence, ambition, humor and being an interesting all-around guy. Since it's hard to convey these traits on a profile, women can only judge you by your photo, your income, your age/height/weight, etc. You become an impersonal number.

We've all known physically flawed men who get hot girlfriends. Clearly, women are more forgiving of a man's physical imperfections if he has an attractive personality. Sadly, it's hard to convey that personality with an online profile.

I'm not saying never to use dating websites. But don't rely solely on them. Go and meet people in person. You'd find better girls in-person as well.

Alive-Doughnut2345 · 2021-09-20T08:07:23+00:00

Nobody is saying the odds are in your favour but if you sit around and do nothing you’re guaranteed to get just that; nothing. So go try. It’s not about bagging every girl you see. It’s about building connections until you find one that likes you

That’s how I look at it.

yurifca · 2021-09-20T10:00:07+00:00

You're thinking basically just about looks in this comparisson, and even by this point of view I think you're a little mistaken.

Just having the balls to talk to a girl will put you miles ahead of anyone sending texts, cause boldness is attractive per se, and you're presenting yourself to her right here, right now, it's a lot more personal and 'real'. Besides, some people have terrible social media skills, and are actually a lot better in person, so maybe a shit history with online dating is not a reflection of your actual dating skills or attractiveness or whatever. The same way someone with great pictures and a lot of followers can be kinda disapointing in real life, be in their appearance or a bland personality or even bad people skills.

Spetsnaz1776 · 2021-09-20T10:18:04+00:00

Last week, sat at a bar, woman sits next to me, next thing I know I bring her back to my place. Tinder has always been like walking on eggshells for me. Make friends, and be more outgoing.

rewinder909 · 2021-09-20T10:59:43+00:00

Unless you're really good looking your not going to attract good looking girls online. It's like the market rules, there are more males than females on dating apps, so just in there, the odds are already against you. The difference between tinder and live game it's that in tinder it's only pics and text. IRL you can talk to the girl make her laugh, and trigger some emotions you can't through a dating app. You're not obliged to go to a club, try daygame. It's way better and easier since you can hear everything and it's a good way to start a good relationship. Night game is more for have fun, hookups and get laid, but it's way harder. It all depends on what you're looking for.

Competitive-Link-912 · 2021-09-20T12:48:55+00:00

I think that a lot of men’s issues with online dating is the inability to set up a good profile.

I can say with confidence, I am a 8.5 or 9/10 man. I get checked out by women every day in real life to the point where work colleagues and ex girlfriends will point out that I’m being eye fucked as we walk down the street or comment on how handsome I am.

However am never taking photos, have no idea how to do it properly and have a terrible selection for my dating apps. Because of this, I get way less attention on apps than real life. I don’t do terribly, but I cannot compare it to my success in real life.

I really think if you put some serious effort into your profile you can slay on dating apps. However, for me, I’m too awkward in photos.

dry-foo · 2021-09-20T11:56:55+00:00

What are your goals? What are your strengths and weaknesses? I think it depends person to person.

When going out I think you have more mediums for seducing ladies. Not just pictures. You also can screen the girls much better than online. Most guys are too lazy to go out, too, so you have much less competition.

I think you should definitely go 1-2 times a week out on your own without your friends.

You also sound like you're frustrated. Have you had much luck in online dating apps?

appmanga · 2021-09-20T14:43:35+00:00

You also have to pay for a drink or a table (if in the club).

Uh, no, you don't.

You have to approach the girl and if she finds you unattractive she won't respond or will just reject you.

You're equating attraction with looks, and that's a mistake. Confidence is an attraction, and if you only knew how many women wind up with a guy simply because he made her laugh you'd likely be shocked. Also, the way you smell can't be seen on an app, and the right scent can be very attractive.

And being rejected is part of the price you pay for trying. Rejection does not kill, it doesn't make your hair fall out, nor does it make you break out in blisters. It's just a form of "no". Even if it's done in the shittiest way in front of other people, know that embarrassment is temporary unless you allow it to be otherwise. To be honest, you shouldn't be easily embarrassed anyway.

Online dating should just be one arrow in your quiver, and it should never be seen as more important or effective for meeting people than your ability to walk up to someone and start a conversation.

zeninfinity · 2021-09-20T15:40:20+00:00

Old guy here - Back in the day, just getting out there and meeting people was step 1.

Now there are insane amounts of steps to just get to step 1, being in front of someone and see if something's there. Overall, you can tell almost instantly if there is something there with someone...something pretty much impossible on dating apps.

Ridiculousrebellion · 2021-09-20T16:16:11+00:00

I’m a good looking dude I like to think. BUT my personality and energy…it’s my secret weapon. I can’t really show that in an app. I do decent on apps, but in person I’d say I’m way better.

To get the girl it’s about how you make them feel, yeah they have to be a little attracted to you. However, just like in dating people get cuter or uglier the more you know about them. Lol

Bottom line in person there is a way higher chance to get any girl you see. You’re already in front of her. :)

TheSunshineMan · 2021-09-21T02:11:48+00:00

Because it proves you're not a shy insecure puss puss who has to hide behind a phone screen to try and talk to girls.

Instead of being 1 out of 100 guys that messaged her that day on Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, Instagram, Facebook, text message etc.

You're the 1 guy who hit on her in public that day, week, month or possibly year.

Plus with daygame/night game the quality of girl you bang will generally be higher on average.

So you have zero success online, for how long?

Years?

And wondering if you should give day game a shot?

What do you have to lose?

But with your mindset of thinking it won't work then it probably won't because it sounds like you've already failed before you tried.

You also have to pay for a drink or a table (if in the club).

Says who?

I've gone out solo to bars and clubs, and never once bought a a single alcoholic drink or paid for a table.

Just show up, talk to girls.. nothing else needed.

norwegiandoggo · 2021-09-20T08:55:37+00:00

as time passes your rating goes down (ELO) and the algo pushes you wayy down and you are left with algo providing only ugly chicks,

This is simply not true. Tinder doesn't use ELO scores for a long time now.

However, what I don't understand is how is "live" game (be it day or night game) any different?

One difference in that your personality and social status can shine more readily. And the second part is that women are less judgemental (regarding looks and other superficial traits) in real life compared to online. If you're charming and ugly, real life will be better than online dating. But you shouldn't exclude either option to begin with. Keep trying both until one seems to give you better results than the other. Then you can focus on the winning approach from there.

dontbanmeagaindudes · 2021-09-20T10:19:05+00:00

Talking with real people is way better than just using your phone.

Because you need to learn how to socialize, how to take risks and so many other things and see that as self development.

Emotional_Grape8449 · 2021-09-20T11:27:39+00:00

How do you go out alone and start talking with girl

mustafarian · 2021-09-20T15:00:39+00:00

The whole point is online vs in person approaching is differentiation. How do you differentiate yourself online vs in person. Online its very superficial unless you are super good looking, have some sort of funny prompts, its difficult to differentiate yourself. So you don't have an EDGE.

Girls typically don't get approached in person, and imo they get frustrated with online dating as well. So seeing them in person or approaching them in person gets you the edge of showing your confidence and your personality. Obviously this is also alot harder because you have to face the possibility of rejection in your face but honestly if you are relaxed and keep it chill it's no big deal. If you think about it you are getting rejected online every day you just don't have to face it

WheelIntelligent1354 · 2021-09-20T19:19:29+00:00

Live game helps even out the playing field. The ability to cold approach by itself adds points even if you get rejected 95% of the time, and when you get a yes that's way more likely to result in actual sex because they remember you.

sittingbull23 · 2021-09-20T22:02:48+00:00

Maybe I just have a really shitty profile when I try OLD but I have had girls aggressively approach me irl that are far more attractive than any girl I've ever matched with in OLD. It is the weirdest thing ever. I'll try to get my chiseled six pack back again and see what results I get lol. I would still never use OLD to find a serious partner, only for hook ups.

great_account · 2021-09-21T00:46:08+00:00

You in person is different from you on line. I'm generally considered handsome and charming in person, but none of that comes out in my online profile. I feel like what makes you unique is hard to see online. In my experience, my dates are generally hotter when I met them in person.

prettydirtyboy · 2021-09-21T02:13:14+00:00

I’d hate being this unaware

2021-09-21T03:55:02+00:00

Most men get 1 match per 50 swipes.

With cold approach, at the very least you can get 1 date out of 10 approaches. See the difference now?

Plus you can date the women you actually want to date.

SnooHesitations4922 · 2021-09-21T05:26:39+00:00

People recommend real life game because it's way better. It's a more organic and natural first impression and neither person has expectations and questions swirling around in their head prior to meeting in person the first time because you already met on the first interaction, websites and texting don't convey tone and vibe naturally. Yes rejection still happens if u ain't the girls type but I prefere a 80% rejection rate to 99% rejection. If u can make a girl laugh i.r.l. she will overlook flaws, internet chicks don't do that, they are shallow a.f. because o.l.d. enables them to be that way.

Offline dating has been the way for thousands if not millions of years, and we are letting big tech take over human nature for profit. And u need to consider the fact that how u meet the person does matter, often times it's an indicator of the quality of the individual. Even when women from o.l.d. liked me and hooked up with me, they put me thru some bat crazy shit that no one from real life ever put me through.

5_7pickup · 2021-09-21T08:59:40+00:00

Because IRL interactions are inescapably and undeniably…. real.

CompetitionFair7686 · 2021-09-22T00:20:02+00:00

It’s easier to get a girl to like you if you have social skills,m because she can’t just be like swipe left. In Tinder you are quickly disregarded based only on how you look, no chance to speak. In person people aren’t that quick to dismiss someone hence more opportunity

MelatoninSleep · 2021-09-22T01:49:43+00:00

You don’t need to pay for her drink at the bar fuck that

Title	Why do people here recommend going out over online dating?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	37
Comments	44
Date	September 20, 2021 7:56 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/prq7rg/why_do_people_here_recommend_going_out_over/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-do-people-here-recommend-going-out-over-online.1275817 https://theredarchive.com/post/1275817

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