Why is nonchalance so attractive to women?

VorpalPaperclip · 2022-04-27T18:06:55+00:00

Because you aren’t desperate and that equates to their safety. Confidence is #1 with women and not giving a shit is a way to display confidence.

Throwaway1010069 · 2022-04-27T18:11:22+00:00

This is an interesting topic and hope we get some input. I am a natural go-getter, try hard, kind of person, and I am definitely trying to rein that in, because I'm feeling that it's counter-productive in dating.

Sweaty_Space_3693 · 2022-04-27T19:23:55+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Gordon101 · 2022-04-27T19:00:14+00:00

Any tips on how to be more nonchalant and detached? I keep telling myself that I'm detached and I have zero expectations, but then I find myself in certain situations where I experience uncontrolled attachment and jealousy.

Calamity__Bane · 2022-04-27T20:42:16+00:00

Many reasons:

It relaxes people, which eliminates anxiety and encourages them to draw nearer.
It gives people space to feel their own feelings and go with the flow of their own impulses. When you’re nonchalant, you give the other person space to be drawn to you, and can simply encourage that rather than forcing your agenda onto them.
It allows tension to build in the atmosphere without you doing things to break it.
It demonstrates confidence and power.
It lowers the chance you’ll do dumb shit out of anxiety or neediness and break attraction.
It causes you to focus on the other person’s behavior more than your own thoughts.
It makes you more willing to take risks stemming from your own desire to amuse yourself.
You won’t scare her off by imposing yourself on her (since you’re undoubtedly much stronger than she is and are a physical threat).
There’s some ego involved in trying to shake a person who’s a bit on the aloof side.

SinSlayer · 2022-04-27T19:28:51+00:00

Being non-chalant with women works because it elicits two strong emotions: Curiosity and Insecurity.

Most attractive women go through their day constantly being approached, hit on, and chased after.

Enter the man that just doesn't care...

It makes her wonder... why?

Why doesn't he chase after me like all the others?

Reminds me of the old addage "The mouse unchased becomes curious about the cat."

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-04-27T18:40:42+00:00

Indifference/non-attachment is the most powerful thing in the world. Women are inspired when they come across a guy who is non-chalant/indifferent because they themselves wish to be this way. It's also what an alpha male really is. Someone who is not affected by the outside world and can handle any situation.

Euphoric_Clock9394 · 2022-04-27T19:36:48+00:00

Some women like to think it’s confidence that makes a man this way. I hate it on the other hand. No shade tho!

AngledLuffa · 2022-04-27T19:55:33+00:00

Eh, dunno

EnvironmentalRule525 · 2022-04-27T21:16:46+00:00

There is a perfect balance to be struck between general nonchalance with a burning desire to chase your dreams. All while not giving the girl too much of your attention, but enough so she knows you like her. Every now and then do something extra special for her just because you fuckin want to.

She should know you love her, (LTR) but absolutely do not need her. If she dumps you today she better be damn certain that you will shrug it off and go pull another baddie within a couple weeks. This keeps healthy relationships alive.

hagakurejunkie · 2022-04-27T22:45:26+00:00

Because in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.

Every other simp is thirsty and you're not. So they ask "Why doesn't he fawn all over me? What else does he have going on?"

Now you've become interesting and aloof and people want what they can't have and they value things far more when they earn it.

2022-04-27T21:02:11+00:00

Because the less you care, the easier it is.

SnooHesitations4922 · 2022-04-28T00:14:49+00:00

Because you are less likely to give away free attention. Women are like cats. You give them attention and they ignore u and walk away, u ignore them and they are all over you.

This concept is magnified greatly in 2022. Women have hundreds of thirsty simps hitting them up all day instead of having their own life. Social media has 4s, 5s, and 6s thinking they are 10s, and cultivated a pandemic of narcissism, but ultimately a woman's default nature remains the same...they want what they can't have. This is why the path of the sigma male is highly effective in game, especially for introverts. By this logic, being nonchalant and mysterious is even more effective nowadays, because u stand out from your competitors who are putting her on a pedestal instead of treating her like an equal.

Golferama · 2022-04-27T20:09:11+00:00

Low value women would be insecure and think it’s hot. High value women would not dare to be with a guy who has a not give a shot mentality. Being non challant works for young crazy women who are insecure, as you get older and they hit the wall they want someone who cares and wants to have goals and ambition in life

TalkQuick · 2022-04-27T20:36:17+00:00

Liking yourself and being confident is a quality most people want in themselves. So seeing it in another person is attractive

boredjamaican · 2022-04-27T22:35:38+00:00

Being nonchalant has never really worked for me if anything girls complain about it and wish I'd be the opposite of that

fewbar2021 · 2022-04-27T23:55:50+00:00

Probably because the opposite is kinda creepy and often disingenuous

Title	Why is nonchalance so attractive to women?
Author	External_Lifeguard49
Upvotes	117
Comments	82
Date	April 27, 2022 6:01 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ud9pvg/why_is_nonchalance_so_attractive_to_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-is-nonchalance-so-attractive-to-women.1261042 https://theredarchive.com/post/1261042

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