Why do girls always ask why am I `quiet’?

2022-09-08T23:01:36+00:00

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GeezRick · 2022-09-09T02:16:25+00:00

Listen, when a woman wants to talk to you she’ll use any excuse to do so.

SnooHesitations4922 · 2022-09-08T23:03:58+00:00

This is a good thing! Sometimes they using your silence as an excuse to open a set with you and/or genuinely want to know why ur quiet. Yeh some will try to shame u or talk shit, but more often than not a woman won't go out of her way to talk to a guy she don't want to connect with. Perhaps you got some sigma qualities, girls are coming up to you to start a convo while millions of dudes still trying to figure out how to approach. Truth is if ur quiet yet present, and handsome, u don't got to do jack shit.

2022-09-09T02:28:43+00:00

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StealthyRobot · 2022-09-09T03:28:33+00:00

When asked why I'm quiet, I typically shrug and say I save my words for when they're needed.

When told I'm quiet, I usually just give a simple nod. Sometimes a "mhmm" or a "yep"

Ambitious-Ice2357 · 2022-09-09T00:13:16+00:00

They’re interested in getting to know you.

cobraCL · 2022-09-09T04:57:11+00:00

This is a generalization, but some extroverts don't understand introverts. I'm a quiet / observant type and get this a lot.

On the plus side, you have caught their attention and can use the situation to build conversation 1 on 1.

-Skizzy · 2022-09-09T04:41:54+00:00

As long as you’re not being the terminator it’s a good thing! Women are used to guys constantly talking their heads off about nonsense.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2022-09-09T04:58:07+00:00

Many people feel insecure when they talk to someone and that person doesn't engage with them much. They suspect maybe they are boring and this person doesn't like them. They blame the other person for being quiet as a form of insecure defensiveness. Other people don't have a filter and say what they think. So they will say you are quiet if thats what they are thinking. The best thing you can do is own it and admit you are quiet, like to listen, and prefer it that way.

masmiester · 2022-09-09T01:37:10+00:00

Take this as a constructive comment from one introvert to another ( you)

Speak up and find your voice, be more assertive, take the lead sometimes, be the first to make a move and engage in some chat or banter....you have a lot to offer, but no one knows it....

froze_gold · 2022-09-09T11:41:05+00:00

Tell her "Sssshh, I'm a secret agent here on official business to tell you that you're in danger of having a good time with me"

champion_bitch · 2022-09-09T03:02:12+00:00

Its High possibility that she wants your attention

TheNomadAdventurer · 2022-09-09T01:01:22+00:00

On the bright side, it’s generally better to talk too little than too much. Women strongly dislike men who ramble.

ResponsibilityRare72 · 2022-09-09T03:37:16+00:00

It can be good or bad depends on if your good looking bro.

bitchybarbie82 · 2022-09-09T10:40:39+00:00

They find you attractive so they’re attempting to get to know you

Cynical_Doggie · 2022-09-09T07:37:53+00:00

Ask them why they are so loud.

External_Lifeguard49 · 2022-09-09T09:27:19+00:00

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Peacebone000 · 2022-09-09T01:39:08+00:00

You sound like you're an introvert. But they seem like they are attracted in some way if they are coming up to you.

Nalayak_Launda · 2022-09-09T08:10:38+00:00

You got unspoken rizz my guy congrats

RhapsodicMan · 2022-09-09T13:00:05+00:00

an introverted psychotherapist's two cents -- when a girl or any 1 person comes up to you , it becomes a 1 on 1 social interaction as opposed to "social" group convo and interaction with multiple people riffing off each other and in my experience introversion would apply bit differently here. Others here have said it already, if someone approaches you and strikes a convo then they are interested in you, regardless of you being "quiet" in a larger group interaction. Then it's up to you, if you like the girl and whether you are introverted or not, you would naturally want to express curiosity and mutual interest in them. If you are not interested in them, then their comments shouldn't bother you that much (but it seems so?)

Anyway, more contextual info of you as person and the types of women that tend to approach you would be useful. Precision in communication never hurts if you want equally precise feedback.

sonniedarko · 2022-09-09T14:56:13+00:00

I love quite men, they let me talk a lot 😂😂😂 the best listeners

It’s awkward for some tho bc they’re doing all the talking and you’re just kinda there. Girls want you to reciprocate and seem interested in them.

Dragru · 2022-09-09T17:47:20+00:00

Usually when I wake up and in a good mood I talk goof around alot at work but there will be times I'm tired, and am thinking deeply and girls will always ask why I'm quiet.

I just tell them im tired, focused, or thinking. If they press on about what I'm thinking I'll tell them.

Although I had one time I was keeping to myself cause I was sad. This older lady that I'd joke with got mad at me for not talking but that was a fluke 99% of girls wanna know what your thinking especially if your usually social then suddenly stop talking. Kinda funny actually.

KrikoryanG · 2022-09-09T17:56:12+00:00

That's not necessarily bad. Actually as many other people say here is that maybe they are intrigued by you and because you are kinda the mistery in the room they want to know more about you and talk more with you. Congrats!

Gold-Stable7109 · 2022-09-09T18:55:35+00:00

Yeah man, these girls just want to talk to you. My boyfriend is super similar. We could be sat with all of his friends and he only pipes up when there’s an interesting topic or a funny joke really. He’s a “quiet guy” and I love that about him. He thinks before he speaks and it seems like the majority of quiet people do, so congrats!

3boodqt · 2022-09-09T01:25:38+00:00

I don’t know if why, but if you sense they’re asking a genuine question answer with whatever you like to answer (a joke, genuine answer; up to you).. but!! if you see an indirect insult answer with: why do you talk too much (but please do it playfully!!). Lastly don’t listen to Coco who commented, there is nothing wrong with being a quite person.

what-diddy-what-what · 2022-09-09T02:11:36+00:00

Asks why girls always ask why he's quiet, and then openly says he doesn't talk a lot. Is this for real? lolz

Turbulent-Lemon-4015 · 2022-09-09T15:31:09+00:00

They think you're shy and definitely this is not attractive. You should speak loud and confident, practice it every day without trying to make yourself likeable and you'll get there in a year or two. Per general you have more success in life as an extrovert so become one.

Why girls like older guys? Because they're confident. A young guy speak quiet, avoid eye contact and he's nervous making girls nervous too.

takeitorleaveit1111 · 2022-09-09T11:59:46+00:00

I used to get this a fair bit from time to time. Imo, 70 percent is that your mysterious in a good way- 20 percent is that they are using a compliment to try to challenge you, and 10 percent is they find you a little bit introverted for them. I think the key is to avoid the last bit is to just be coherent and not awkward.

I used to have problems with making things awkward- but I'm 24 now and I'm half way to being on the Jamie Foxx level of anti-awkwardness

recyclablebanthas · 2022-09-11T10:25:56+00:00

But whenever I am in a social setting, girls always come up to me, strike a conversation and then ask why I don’t talk a lot or why am I so `quiet’.

Look, if they say this, then:

They're curious about you.
And you're being quiet.

It's not complicated.

You've left out a ton of information though:

Where are these social settings? And who is there? What is going on? What are people in this setting doing?
Are these girls even people you find interesting?
Why do you think you're not talking much?
How far are you getting with all these girls who ask why you're so quiet?

CocoBabeinNYC · 2022-09-09T00:26:42+00:00

It means you are socially awkward.

MO_drps_knwldg · 2022-09-09T18:58:44+00:00

Women generally don’t like shy/quiet men

CometAzur42069 · 2022-09-09T05:03:34+00:00

You dont talk, you dont have an opinion on anything

2022-09-09T00:13:40+00:00

They aren’t entertained by you.

External_Lifeguard49 · 2022-09-08T22:51:56+00:00

It's a subtle way of humiliation

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2022-09-09T04:41:02+00:00

...if i have something funny or important to say.

Nobody lives up to a standard like that. Most people don't even try. We all say a thousand completely forgettable things every week. Give yourself that freedom and you'll become a more engaging person very quickly.

Sea_Particular_9086 · 2022-09-09T05:31:17+00:00

Less is more—If they ask you why you don’t talk alot. Ask them what would you like to ask me, or what do you want to talk about. Those two questions there stump people alot.

You will here I don’t know, or they start thinking of something to ask you. You can answer and then flip the question back onto the other person. Which in-turn can start a better conversation overall.

melmelok · 2022-09-09T06:24:17+00:00

It’s a way they’re trying to start a convo brotha 😎 a lot of girls like shy guys so good for u

incognito3107 · 2022-09-09T06:56:31+00:00

I guess they get used to be entertained with conversation by boys all the time. Maybe they would like you participate more in group activity, as they feel you would provide some attractive value to the mood. You can step up a bit with your activity, but still do your thing. If they go with "why you are so quiet", you can go with "maybe others are too noisy".

Zhai · 2022-09-09T10:17:22+00:00

Because they want to have interaction with you, dumbo.

Kokadison · 2022-09-09T13:01:10+00:00

It’s a good thing imo, a lot of the time when I talk to guys and they’re loud and don’t know how to stop talking it’s kinda annoying. I also think it’s cuz we’re used to most guys being very loud and boisterous. My boyfriend has times where he’s very loud when talking and he doesn’t even realize it lol.

RavenLordx · 2022-09-09T13:47:42+00:00

You are doing something right. Keep up

Beginning-Rule1548 · 2022-09-09T16:12:51+00:00

Because you are quiet.

mrmaskfawkes · 2022-09-09T16:54:59+00:00

Typically they want you to talk more or think you aren't interested. Best advice first say "oh I'm just listening" then lean in and comment on something they said, and finish with a question.try to actively engage. Being laid back is fine but remember it can come off as disinterest. Don't comeback too strong but it's good t9 show y9ure engaged and listening, the rule of "let them talk more about them" still appplies just don't saying nothing and stare like you're a lemming.

WestXD · 2022-09-09T17:09:26+00:00

I get told this so many times

MrDankky · 2022-09-09T18:25:00+00:00

Makes you seem intelligent, don’t sweat it, girls like it in my experience. As long as when you do converse you’re actually intelligent lol

c4rdc0llector11 · 2022-09-09T19:23:41+00:00

Cuz they wanna fuck u

jackedsoon · 2022-09-09T19:34:03+00:00

dont be that guy. i always thought i was 'laid back nonchalant' but it didnt get me shit and only made girls turned off when i wouldnt talk much to them, it only works if ur famous or something. being lowkey is worst thing to do in social setting. theyll just focus on the louder/more talkative guys. espc in clubs.

gangweedsavedme · 2022-09-09T20:28:37+00:00

It’s because they are interested/curious. Like are you quiet because you’re shy or because you’re a bad ass. It doesn’t really matter, they just want to talk to you, and see how you talk.

shekamu · 2022-09-09T22:33:39+00:00

Well you are getting their attention being queit. Imagine talking and keeping them engaged in what you have to say. If they are asking about it, usually take it as a compliment.

greedo80000 · 2022-09-10T23:33:34+00:00

Lol this is what failing upwards looks like

Ok_Ad_367 · 2022-09-11T10:10:29+00:00

Probably you dont ask them questions

Title	Why do girls always ask why am I `quiet’?
Author	External_Lifeguard49
Upvotes	312
Comments	85
Date	September 8, 2022 10:44 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/x9e7ob/why_do_girls_always_ask_why_am_i_quiet/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-do-girls-always-ask-why-am-i-quiet.1250340 https://theredarchive.com/post/1250340

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