Why women shit test men (female psychology and male disposability, comments are an interesting read)

ghebert001 · 2012-07-30T10:08:23+00:00

It took not giving a shit if my wife leaves to start realizing "I don't want to play this game anymore" and when you reach the point that you don't give a shit if your wife leaves or not, there isn't really much love in that relationship. Instinctual or not, shit tests do you no favours ladies.

sp8der · 2012-07-30T06:33:43+00:00

Shit like this makes me glad I'm a homo.

Not that that doesn't bring a whole host of other problems, but I feel for my heter-bros on this one.

StunnedMullet · 2012-07-30T06:54:00+00:00

One day he talked about his father’s funeral the year before. As he described the feelings that had come over him as he approached the open casket, he broke down and began to sob. His huge, masculine body shuddered as he poured out his heart and his grief. I felt a surge of empathy, but also alarmed. I had never been in this role, and felt unprepared to cope. I also felt repelled as the tears streamed down his cheeks and fell from his cleft chin.

I understand the article, but I don't understand the logic behind it. Even the comments on the page seem to be like 'yep, par for the course and what not. Carry on'. Is this really what the PUA community is like at the core?

I couldn't even begin to contemplate doing anything like this to ANYONE in order to work out how 'suitable' they are for me, how has this become something that is 'okay'?

SpiritofJames · 2012-07-30T05:58:24+00:00

Frankly, if men are expected to resist the urge to look at other women, women should be expected to resist the urge to shit-test. Seems to me it has never even been mentioned to them how incredibly inhumane it can be, and I think they really need to learn.

Fuck women who do this, even if it's their 'natural tendency.' I'd rather be alone than have to deal with this kind of fucking bullshit.

ajay63 · 2012-07-30T16:47:33+00:00

and this my friends, is how men turn into assholes.. #your-welcome

im_your_tulpa · 2012-07-30T05:36:16+00:00

Ugh, I guess I've been passing these "tests" so well that I get extra credit and get passed onto the next class.

I have no stomach for head games, and have broken up with women over shit like this. If this stuff is true, I suppose that explains the exes that want to get back with me long after the fact.

ExpendableOne · 2012-07-30T15:53:07+00:00

I honestly cannot stand these types of "shit tests". Either a man cares for a woman, is emotionally vulnerable and/or wants to do things for her, in which case she is a position of power and she should be responsible for that power(that is, not abusing it or taking advantage of that man; much like a man in a position of power or greater physical strength would be expected to not use that power to take advantage of women), or he stands up to her and then he "passes", as if it was his job to keep her in check or somehow be responsible for her behavior. Both are completely mental.

Men shouldn't be expected to "keep women in check" or keep women safe/protected. It's not their responsibility. Having a penis doesn't make you responsible for the well-being of women. Men are not women's personal police, enforcers or security systems. If a woman doesn't feel safe, she should either do what she needs to do to feel safe for herself, or figure out what makes her so scared to begin with.

Men should also be allowed to be insecure, "doormats" or "weak" if they happen to be, just as any other women would be allowed to be and accepted for. It's not okay for women to take advantage of men who may be emotionally weak or for women to abuse a man's good will just because she feels like it. This isn't something that should be encouraged or accepted from women, especially in personal relationships where many men actually want to be givers without having to worry about it being used against them or exploited. Men shouldn't have to be strong, just so that women don't have to be.

primaloath · 2012-07-30T10:26:27+00:00

One of the many female privileges: being able to advocate for a position or action you want your man to take, and expecting him to be able to intuit that you're actually being insincere in your demands and want him to do the opposite. And of course the privilege of feeling justified in thinking less of him when he "fails".

Insincerity is one of the worst human traits, and that's what shit tests amount to.

MrStonedOne · 2012-07-31T01:38:23+00:00

i dont pass or fail shit tests. i refuse to answer.

here's one I got:

Pick her up for a date.

Shes distant, silent, etc

Wall of ice between you two.

whats wrong? nothing. im fine.

2 hours of 'whats wrong' later she finally admits:

''You didn't comment on my new [blah] last week''

Now think about this. if she had said that on the first whats wrong question. how would you react? You would ask her why the fuck shes getting all distant and silent and wall of icey over something so small.

But because she waited to tell you till you've been trying to pry it from her for two hours. how do you respond? ''oh shit im so sorry how can i make it up to you''

How did I respond? I took her back home and that was the last I saw of her.

(oh wait that's right, mras are bitter neck-beard creeps who can't get laid, so this story never happened =p)

Froztwolf · 2012-07-31T12:15:47+00:00

Personally I don't mind if a woman I'd be starting to get serious with threw me a shit test or two. I get it, she wants to make sure to end up with a guy that can handle himself when shit goes down emotionally.

But the examples mentioned in the article are just nasty and bizarre.

Why would you shit test a guy you've already just married? Isn't the point of the shit test to find a desirable partner? This implies a huge amount of insecurity with the relationship.

And throwing a shit test at a guy who is still an emotional wreck because of the death of his father? Not cool.

Starting a relationship with someone, you want to gauge how they are going to handle themselves down the line, and that can be hard without manufacturing situations sometimes. I get it. But surely there are better ways than these two examples suggest.

2012-07-30T19:30:23+00:00

i'm confused. shit testing is basically creating a scenario to gauge how much control you have over someone? yes/no.

if yes, that's fucking stupid. why would someone do that when you can spend an equal amount of time doing something fun or productive with a SO? sounds like a colossal waste of energy.

Undoer · 2012-07-30T20:03:19+00:00

I think this thread emphasizes the differences between most pua's and most MRA's.

2012-07-31T01:24:13+00:00

Stop caring about their outburst. It's not your job to deal with someone else's emotions. As soon as you stop caring they stop doing this shit. You just have to go against everything you were told about comforting women when they cry/act out.

Demonspawn · 2012-07-30T05:30:17+00:00

And people think "Game" has no place in the MRM...

Probably because understanding Game makes on realize why equality is impossible, and the Social Liberal MRAs can't accept that reality.

DavidByron · 2012-07-30T21:57:59+00:00

Well that's a new term on me and quite clever I think, but I do wonder how people in general would react to it. Perhaps if someone were to move this to AskReddit and we could boost it up, I think it would be very interesting.

Is the term well known and it's just me that's heard of it first here?

I guess I've never put up with shit like that that I wasn't prepared to, but I am willing to put up with a lot, if it doesn't humiliate me. I don't mind killing bugs for example, which seems like an example of this sort of behaviour to some extent, but without so much of the emotional manipulation.

Also the article seemed to think that women dislike men who they can easily manipulate and portray the test as one you fail if you "pass". But I think most of this stuff is just pure manipulation and trying to get one up, to win an argument or to get her way, with no conscious idea that "if he does this for me he really must be stupid".

That aspect seems a separate doctrine added on to the rest and just comes across as a variant on, "Women love bad boys".

DavidByron · 2012-07-30T12:09:10+00:00

I really don't get the big deal. We all test people we're interested in relationships with. We all just use differing criteria.

Ditching someone who worships her like a goddess is a good way for her to ensure that any spouse she ended up with wouldn't be a total pushover. Just like before I married my wife I made sure that she was strong enough to stand up to me and disagree when it matters.

As for her criteria? Sure they're stupid, but one of my criterion for my mate was "a girl who loves starwars." Any less stupid? I doubt it.

Let women like her have their silly criteria. You're under no obligation to be any part of her life.

InfinitelyThirsting · 2012-07-30T13:37:30+00:00

Why pushback on biology? It is how woman are wired and guess what? It fucking works. If you complain about being shit tested or fail shit tests look inside yourself and realize you are probably being emotional, weak, and needy. There is no reason a woman should desire those traits. Enough of the "BIT I DONT WANT TO PLAY HE GAME. sob sob".... I respect woman's ability to accurately gauge a man's confidence. Literally woman can get past looks and love uglier men because he has balls.

Complaining about this is equal to woman complaining that all we care about is looks, which is true and also natural and healthy.

Title	Why women shit test men (female psychology and male disposability, comments are an interesting read)
Author	123ggafet
Upvotes	26
Comments	97
Date	July 30, 2012 5:09 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/xdll4/why_women_shit_test_men_female_psychology_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/why-women-shit-test-men-female-psychology-and-male.1016886 https://theredarchive.com/post/1016886

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