depression is getting in the way of my goals

Strange-Novel-1710 · 2022-02-21T22:13:33+00:00

Make sure you've ruled out all possibilities of what is causing it. I had chronic severe depression for a decade before figuring it out and finally seeing real improvements. Anything could be causing it beyond the obvious traumas.

I had a mixture of childhood trauma, PMDD (may just be a symptom of my other issues), severe SAD (went to a hot climate for 3 months and depression drastically improved, and immediately was bad upon return to the cold&dark climate) and currently trying to get a diagnosis for what I think is an autoimmune disease since my depression all but disappeared when I went gluten free for 3 weeks. All of these helped a significantly. A good bandaid was St. John's Wort. I had no side effects, and it works great, just not with other medications, and has to be taken 3x a day. It took the edge off my worst days and gave me just enough mental clarity to have the discipline to take care of my body.

EMDR therapy was the most difficult and necessary thing I have ever done, it helped me work through my traumas. And then I sealed the deal by taking up my own version of daily meditation: 30 minutes sitting quietly, tapping (learned from EMDR), and breathing in for 5, out for 5, hold for 1, repeat. Changed my life over a few months and helped me deeply relax, sleep better, improved anxiety to the point people who previously knew me felt awkward at my calm demeanor.

I also had vitamin deficiencies, and taking D, B complex, K, C, Calcium, Omega-3 fatty acids, and a few others made noticeable improvements in energy and attitude within a week.

Lastly, most likely due to whatever gut issue I have, I am extremely sensitive to a lot of foods and sugar. So I fast for ~20 hours, 2-3 days a week, since chronic inflammation can also contribute to depression, and fasting helps.

I also recently began a low sugar, vegetables, potatoes, and good meats kind of diet. I also removed myself from my previously toxic environment and friends....and the last thing I intend to do is move to a warmer climate permanently next year, because I am important and will destroy my mental health challenges no matter what it takes. And you are just as important too.

Books that helped me for various reasons that were contributing to my depression and overall unhappiness including body image, being a pushover and not knowing why, food problems, trauma, bad coping habits, no desire to take care of my body, addiction, etc:

The Bible

The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck

No More Mr. Nice Guy

Never Split The Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It

The Surrendered Wife by Laura Doyle

Atomic Habits

"How I Quit Binge Eating - A Guide For Those Who Struggle" Reddit post

The UltraMind Solution

YouTube: HOW TO SELF CARE life changing by AlexandrasGirlyTalk

Best of luck beautiful❤

JadedByEntropy · 2022-02-21T20:51:53+00:00

I hate to say it but Jordan Peterson really helped. I just followed his Instagram and the little bits of professional psychology advice is perfect. That man has suffered so much and always talks directly to causes of issues and not just surface advice. He can fix a lot

MuttonDressedAsGoose · 2022-02-21T18:13:31+00:00

Depression is an illness and will fuck with anyone, no matter what goals they have.

I'm on citslopram, which helped me to stop obsessive and negative thoughts. I don't know if you need a medication.

If talk therapy isn't working, you might want to try a medication. You should speak to a doctor.

In my experience with Citslopram, I felt slightly off for a short while but when it kicked in, I felt such peace.

If you had a broken leg and needed surgery then traction in the hospital, you'd be unable to work for a short while. It is OK to prioritise your health and you don't have to tell your employer what the issue is. A doctor can write a note if you find yourself needing to take a few days off. But there's no reason to assume that you will.

I doubt you're performing at your best, now, anyway. Don't let your work stop you from taking care of yourself.

CountTheBees · 2022-02-22T01:47:20+00:00

Do you get enough sun? I know a guy who suffers from depression, says if he doesn't stand outside at noon for 10min of sun a day he gets the worst depression symptoms. He hates overcast/rainy days.

boofthegirl · 2022-02-21T23:37:41+00:00

Yeah I just wanna say that I tell everyone to bury me with my antidepressants. They honestly changed my life. I know medication isn’t for everyone but they allow me to be a real, functioning woman again.

The only downside is it’s totally murdered my libido. Like executioner style murdered lmao.

cutiebby · 2022-02-21T21:02:34+00:00

Thank you for this post. I've realized that femininty for me is not just being beautiful inside and outside, having a pretty face, cooking delicious meals, being full of positivity and smelling like roses all day. It is too facing my problems, recognizing my rage and dreading thoughts, facing my fears, it's my will to live, my attempts at being a better person every day.

These weeks had been hell for me and i felt so scared, uncomfortable about my body and face, disturbed by small things and unsure about my future, i felt my depression and suicidial thoughts slowly creeping back, i hid at home crying out my feelings hoping they would fade but they never would, i was desperate so i talked about it with someone who really loves me and he said something that really stuck with me: "Your biggest problem is that you think you're cursed by your own sadness, but you're not. Change everything about yourself until you feel comfortable, and if those things that made you feel good don't make it anymore, change again, you are free to do what you want with yourself until you feel happy" I feel like that could apply to what you said about feeling like happiness and femininty are not yours to take.

A new friend invited me to a social reunion and i kept thinking about the times i've been mistreated and ridiculed by people and i was about to reject her, but i remembered the advice i'd been given and decided to give it a try. The sad, anxious and uncomfortable me decided to go out, knowing about all the things that could go wrong, but if i never tried, then how would things change? I had one of the best days i've had in months, people were great and kind, i was complimented on my looks, and i even got to flirt with some guy i really like and he texted me after that saying he enjoyed seeing me. Imagine how i felt! All my feminity and happiness that had been occult for months suddenly came back, just by a single decision i made. That doesn't mean i won't be sad and feel awful again but i remembered all of my virtues and that gave me the impulse i needed to keep going on, i remembered who i really am so i hope you can do it too. :)

Sorry for the long long comment.

Ruffleafewfeathers · 2022-02-21T19:24:19+00:00

I was worried about the same side effects, I have bad depression, anxiety, and PTSD and had been over medicated in the past. When my boyfriend (who also has struggled with depression) tried medication, he became so much better and more functional that I decided to give it a try…I have never been so productive, lacking in anxiety, and able to achieve my dreams. It’s like weights I didn’t even realize were holding me down suddenly got lifted and everything became a million times easier. If a psychiatrist gives you the go ahead, I say give it a try. And also, I had bad therapists in the past, now that I have one that fits me, my life has become immeasurably better. I know it’s hard with depression to get yourself to go to an appointment, let alone shop around for shrinks, but I promise, it’s so worth it when you find the right fit. Best of luck, my dear. We are all rooting for you.

reticentfemininity · 2022-02-22T05:16:43+00:00

I just completed a short course by The University of York about Behavioural activation for depression. It is meant to be one of the most effective ways to get a handle on it. The idea is basically you set yourself a small pleasurable goal and complete it then rate how it made you feel at the end. And then you set another one. It can be as simple as calling your mum for a chat or having a healthy breakfast.

Maximum-Potential-41 · 2022-02-22T08:34:38+00:00

Take your pills and work hard enough to one day take them in ibiza.

SeaGems · 2022-02-21T19:26:43+00:00

I would look into coherence therapy. It's a really intense reliable form of therapy that can help you pinpoint where those issues come from, and resolve them. There are specific methods needed to even access the part of the brain that stores emotionally learned experiences in order to fix any negative defense mechanism built off of those experiences. Depression is one of those deeply imbedded issues it can "unlock access" to and fix. It's amazing.

I can explain in better detail if you'd like, but I found out about it after I had a breakthrough myself that was incredibly life changing, and I immediately began to research what I went through like a madman. I ended up finding out Coherence therapy does everything I went through that caused my breakthrough, but it does it methodically and on purpose.

bubblytoes11 · 2022-02-22T07:22:36+00:00

Do not be afraid to seek medical help if necessary. You probably won’t need an antidepressant forever. Medication is simply a tool to get your brain balanced enough to allow therapy to work. Once you have rebalanced your brain chemically, you can start therapy and then slowly wean off medication when you and your doctor think it is appropriate. Be sure to find a therapist who aligns with your beliefs. I use BetterHelp and they let me choose the characteristics I was looking for in my therapist. I wish you good fortune and you will be in my prayers.

LemurianStarseed11 · 2022-02-25T19:41:30+00:00

I’d look into St. John’s wort, light box and daily cardio. Try the natural solutions before medication which can have a lot of bad serious side effects. Exercise alone is proven to be as effective as medication but once a week isn’t enough.

Title	depression is getting in the way of my goals
Author	luckiestgirl07
Upvotes	19
Comments	28
Date	February 21, 2022 5:46 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/sxzjvt/depression_is_getting_in_the_way_of_my_goals/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/depression-is-getting-in-the-way-of-my-goals.1103663 https://theredarchive.com/post/1103663

Comments