Q4A How differ your standards for each gender?

EulenWatcher · 2022-08-06T06:34:36+00:00

After giving it a bit of thought I guess I have somewhat higher expectations for women. It isn't a good thing, as it's most likely the result of gender roles and stereotypes even though I don't agree with them. I expect women to be more sensible, caring, to have better social skills, to be more organized, to be better parents etc. Not that I think men suck at these aspects, but I'm less surprised to hear that one of my male classmates got jailed or got an oopsie pregnancy. It's a bias given by personal experience and now I wonder whether I can do anything about it.

I don't think I hold men to any higher standards, besides physical strengths, but it's purely biological difference and I don't expect random men to help me with heavy bags or help with a street harasser. Moreover, in both cases chances are higher I'd get help from other women.

GottaPSoBad · 2022-08-06T06:17:29+00:00

Might sound corny, but people are people. I take them as they come, and I treat them as individuals.

AreOut · 2022-08-06T09:13:12+00:00

I expect my male friend to jump in a fight while I expect my female friend to run away as far as possible in that situation.

dbz19_kai · 2022-08-06T09:47:17+00:00

If we're talking friendship and non-romantic stuff, they are exactly the same standards.

I expect a female friend to have the same integrity, reliability, and trustworthiness as a male friend.

If a friend is being a shit friend, they're not gonna get off the hook by being male or female.

ruboyuri · 2022-08-06T14:41:47+00:00

I don’t fear women. Ever

decoy88 · 2022-08-06T10:05:48+00:00

I never mistake a fat dude for being pregnant.

Katatonicsnake · 2022-08-06T10:39:27+00:00

If I’m being honest, I probably demand more of women. I expect them to have good communication skills, and when a woman is unable to control their behavior, I’m more shocked than when a man does it. But when it comes to simple caring and loving, I trust men more.

I don’t expect any random man to be brave or courageous, mostly because a man is also the one who would more likely threaten me. But from the men that are in my life, I guess I expect pampering and protection.

87AudreyHorne · 2022-08-06T06:20:04+00:00

grew up really egalitarian and for the most part I think i have no different standards but I did notice I have a few biases

I definitely expect men to be more outwardly interested and complimentary towards the woman they like/love, while I expect the woman to be a bit more cool.

Basically a man who is very nonchalant and doesn't extend special attention and maybe validation to a woman he is with comes off to me as very cold, disinterested, even rude. I think he doesn't love her. If he is giving the woman special adoration I see it as a very nice and romantic trait.

But if a woman acts very verbally adoring and accommodating to the man she likes, it looks a bit pathetic to me sometimes, or it's crosses that threshold much faster. When a woman is a bit reserved I see it as pride, not coldness and rudeness.

For example if a man and a woman have a small argument the woman is acting cold, and a man tries to warm her heart, I don't normally see an issue with that picture. The other way around I see it as she lowering herself and would think of the man as cruel.

Now these aren't any extremes, I'm talking about pretty subtle things. I'd instantly react negatively to a woman who was cruel or abusive to a man or putting him down, and a man grovelling at a woman's feet would also be pathetic. But in more subtle ways of communication, who is reaching out more, who is a bit softer, I feel I expect men to do a bit more to protect the female ego than the other way around, and expect women to protect their own ego just a bit more. Maybe I expect men to act a bit softer and women to act a bit harsher when together, I guess.

Novadina · 2022-08-06T05:52:03+00:00

I am friends with different types of people, if I get along with them and we enjoy doing something together then I’ll be friends and do that thing with them. I don’t have any expectations as far as I’m aware of, and I have zero idea of how brave any of my friends are.

TheWhispersOfSpiders · 2022-08-06T05:56:20+00:00

I expect my friends to be honest and open-minded. No dark triads need apply, unless they've got their bullshit under control.

Anything beyond that has to do with individual strengths and weaknesses.

pearllovespink · 2022-08-06T12:40:57+00:00

I just said this in another thread but I treat all genders the same. No one is treated differently. I of course expect things to be different based on the relationship.

You did bring up a good point. I’m more likely to go to my female friends for advice. They make better decisions. I go to my male friends just for some laughs and a quick chat most of the time.

Perfect_Promise_943 · 2022-08-06T12:58:24+00:00

Different expectations for both genders.

Women: more social. But at the same time shy. Loud with her friends but quiet in general. Good with kids. Very artistic and in touch with her emotional side. Knows how to enjoy the simple aspects of life like going to the park, having a picnic, taking pictures, walk-in along the river, going to the mall, getting coffee, etc. make the men work hard for her. Don’t say yes to anyone. Be a strong and hard gatekeeper if you will when it comes down to being with her romantically or sexually. Be feminine. A desire to explore life, the world. Desires a work life balance, so not much overtime and prefers less hours of work.

Men: definitely physically stronger. Confident. Willing to speak for his wife or girl friend when she can’t. Driven. Gentleman and chivalrous. Will work his butt off to give his woman the life she wants. Support the woman on quitting her job so she will pursue her passions, whether that is becoming a doctor or chef, to simply staying home all day and going shopping, to painting all day and perhaps not making a dime on it but it’s her passion what makes her happy. Respect women at all cause. Never dare to lay a finger on them. Don’t get angry, don’t get emotional. Control your emotions. A woman can get angry, but you can’t. Make the best decision based on your family, not your self. Take care of not only your direct family, but also hers. Teach your children what a good man looks like.

sarkington · 2022-08-06T15:48:51+00:00

No woman will ever be a physical or sexual concern to me, and that is the only difference in how I treat the genders

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goatismycopilot · 2022-08-06T05:59:56+00:00

Most people are not brave and courageous. I don't have expectations about that and most people do not know their friends and partners as well as they think they do.

Once in a while I am pleasantly suprised but not often.

vogel777 · 2022-08-06T07:55:51+00:00

No not really some of the most courageous people most likely to intervene and say or do something if there is a dangerous situation have been women and some of the most emotionally supportive and caring have been men. Should I scoff at the value these people have brought to various situations just because it doesn’t fit gender norms, no of course not.

TheRedPillRipper · 2022-08-06T10:36:31+00:00

higher standard

The standard that matters most is Trust. The only difference; is who burns it; and who earns it.

Godspeed and good luck!

pinktuliplover · 2022-08-06T11:10:55+00:00

I expect men to make quick decisions, have more confidence, and do more labor if it needs to be done. I also expect normal chivalrous acts such as opening doors and carrying things.

I expect women around me to be nicer overall than men. Or at least to pretend to be nice. I expect better conversation from women. I definitely expect more neatness in women (except for with their cars which are notoriously messy, men almost always have clean cars).

These are just basic standards to me, but both genders equally let me down.

mcove97 · 2022-08-06T13:08:33+00:00

No not really. I don't really care much about traditional gender roles.

GlowingAsItDazzles · 2022-08-06T13:42:57+00:00

i expect "friends" to laugh with me, go to the bar and do coke and dance with me. who the fuck cares if theyre brave, whats wrong with all of you

AstronautLoveShack · 2022-08-06T23:16:59+00:00

I don’t think I have standards the way you seem to describe them. Everyone has different struggles. I just am as pleasant as I can be to the people in my life unless their friendship is somehow damaging to me.

DisasterPeace7 · 2022-08-06T23:38:18+00:00

I mean if we're talking friends I only have one woman that I would actually call a friend, and yes we have slept together, so from that standpoint my standards wouldn't be different with people that I actually use the label of friend but in terms of General society, yeah I guess there might be masculine and feminine roles that you would apply to each one but at the end of the day people are individuals

Title	Q4A How differ your standards for each gender?
Author	eye_fuck
Upvotes	7
Comments	31
Date	August 6, 2022 5:37 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/whgnf1/q4a_how_differ_your_standards_for_each_gender/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4a-how-differ-your-standards-for-each-gender.1126811 https://theredarchive.com/post/1126811

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