People who knowingly have sex married people, how much backlash do they actually deserve?

NJFlowerchild · 2022-11-24T22:51:53+00:00

I wouldn't blame or shame the other woman if my husband cheated on me. Those vows belong to him alone and it's not the job of society to keep him faithful or to guilt him into it.

HazyMemory7 · 2022-11-24T21:39:50+00:00

Well...would you want to be friends with someone who has sex with married people? I wouldn't.

The married person deserves more backlash, but the point remains. Neither should be viewed in a neutral light.

LoomingCrimson · 2022-11-25T00:20:20+00:00

It is not an unmarried person’s obligation to not have sex with a married person. It’s exclusively the unfaithful married person’s responsibility.

Don’t care if the unmarried person is intentionally seductive etc. The married person has to be party to it happening for it to take place at all.

And don’t give me that hot garbage about “helping” someone cheat as if it would change anything if an unmarried person refused to sleep with a married person.

Prostitution or a whole lineup of people in the world would sleep with them. The married person could also lie about being married and trick someone if we magically achieved a utopia where no unmarried person would sleep with any married person.

So many paths leading to one end. A married douche bag who will cheat when they’re motivated enough. Anyone who thinks otherwise is kidding themselves.

Says_Who22 · 2022-11-25T09:14:06+00:00

Someone who knowingly has sex with a married person does deserve backlash, same as the married participant. Both parties show a distinct lack of morals. If they don’t know, or are raped, completely different matter. And ‘sexual coercion’ sounds like rape to me! Forcing someone to have sex with you against their will? That’s rape.

the_chad_goy · 2022-11-24T22:06:28+00:00

If you fuck married people, I will try anything I can do to ruin your life in any way I can

rockerroses · 2022-11-24T20:55:46+00:00

Actually this could also apply to people who are taken but are not married too

tired_hillbilly · 2022-11-25T01:36:39+00:00

I really don't understand the people who don't blame the side piece at all. Yeah, your spouse's vow was only their own, but so what? The side piece is still an accomplice to that pain your cheating spouse caused to you.

Cult_of_Chad · 2022-11-25T01:43:30+00:00

We pick up closeted bisexual dudes to fuck all the time while, I presume, their loyal, loving wives wait for them at home. Guys will literally drop their kids off at school then drop by the gloryhole for a drive by blow.

Can't say I've ever felt any guilt about it. This is the reality of male sexuality that has always and will always exist. That's not an excuse, mind you. I don't feel compelled to apologize for my desires. There's few hangups that a fat dick to the face won't wash away in my experience...

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2022-11-25T16:22:08+00:00

Knowingly sleeping with a married man or woman is shitty but the real person in the wrong is the married person.

If my husband cheated on me my anger will be pointed right at him, he is the one who has promised me to stay faithful

gate18 · 2022-11-26T21:49:38+00:00

I saw a vox-pop where public on the street was asked: A married man cheats on his wife with a young woman, who is to blame?

Everyone blamed the young unmarried woman. That was mindblowing.

I'm married and have two kids. When out in town this young sexy woman hits on me. I tell her I'm married. She says "uh pappy I will not tell anyone" (I made this extreme example up)

The idea that she has to give a fuck about my wife and the kids I have at home is bizarre to me.

Equally, if I hit on a married woman and as a result, she forgets she's married, the idea that it is my fault doesn't compute. (but very few people would blame me in this scenario - it would prove woman are sluts no matter what they do)

TheRedPillRipper · 2022-11-24T21:15:24+00:00

an equal amount

Everyone makes mistakes. Whilst I'm a big proponent for consequences, the pivotal issue isn't about backlash. Or even consequences. It's growth. Take your example of a married cheater. The betrayed spouse will understandably feel some type of way. Then what? Eventually they must accept that betrayal, the outcomes, learn from it, then let it go. Exactly the same for the cheating spouse, and the other person involved. Passing out blame is important, but not the most important thing.

Godspeed and good luck!

5hakeit0ff · 2022-11-24T20:56:53+00:00

The married person if anyone. We don't have a genuine high trust mutual society anymore and pretending like it is what it isn't constitutes futile martyrdom

NationalistGoy · 2022-11-24T21:59:43+00:00

I unkowingly had sex with a married woman. She hid the fact from me, she denied it when I asked her.

For a long time I hated myself for doing it, I also hated her for it, but more than 10 years has passed since and I have kind of gotten over it. She is still married, she has contacted me throghout the years and even proposed I be her boyfriend or at least her affair guy, I said NO to both offers.

Two days ago she called me while crying to tell how awful her husband is, how she is forced to have sex with him and how horrible she feels when she is with him, normally I don't give too much attention to women who willingly put themselves in these situations, but I decided to listen to her because sometimes that's all you need, someone to listen to you until you calm down.

It's dumbfounding, a couple of months ago she was saying things like "I haven't had sex with my husband in a long time, I want to be with you", and the next thing you know, she is having sex with her husband.

To answer the original question, do people who have sex with married people deserve backlash for it? Well, it depends.

Someone who was coerced/tricked, they don't deserve backlash in my opinion.

Someone who knows the other person is married and does it anyway without coercion, they do deserve backlash.

DisasterPeace7 · 2022-11-24T21:02:06+00:00

Well when I was 17 I did have an affair with one of my teammates mothers, I take accountability for my part, certainly wasn't a victim in any way I was almost 20 years younger and a lot less wiser but I wouldn't do it again these days, you never know how that situation might end up, as far as how much backlash in particular I feel I deserve? Not that much,🎶 she was a milf I was a lad can I make it any more oooobvious🎶, but on a scale from 1 to 10 how much backlashed I felt I deserved in that particular moment maybe like a three, she was the one who took the vows not me

And you can hate the other person, but if you're the one in a committed relationship specifically the one who's married you're the one who deserves most of the backlash generally speaking

Repulsive-Cupcake505 · 2022-11-24T21:02:02+00:00

This is a tough one as one of my biggest fantasies is sleeping with a married woman.

I would say normally in these situations the married person is more at fault. People have a responsibility to keep the promises they make, not others.

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neetykeeno · 2022-11-24T23:51:19+00:00

The cheater's decision to cheat is necessary to the cheating...the person they are cheating with could decide not to fuck the cheater and the cheater could likely find someone else to cheat with especially if they were willing to pay for sex. So the cheater is worse. I guess I could think up some bizarre situation in which they are equally bad...but barring unusual contrived stories (hmmmm an example...the cheater cheats with an older person they meet at a bar...it turns out to be the cheated upon persons long estranged narcissist parent who has come back to deliberately ruin their child's life) cheaters are the worst.

ChibsFilipTelfordd · 2022-11-25T01:37:07+00:00

Most people actually don't know the other person is married in my experience. I've never had that mis fortune but

techr0nin · 2022-11-25T03:48:17+00:00

It depends alot on the context of the affair, but generally speaking the cheater should get the primary blame, while the affair partner get secondary blame. The betrayed spouse may or may not have tertiary blame, depending on the circumstances.

Lanky-Sales-5449 · 2022-11-25T17:15:00+00:00

if that person doesn't know the victim, none.

ohdiddly · 2022-11-25T17:28:59+00:00

They shouldn't be blamed whatsoever in my opinion, they aren't the ones who signed up to the social contract. The responsibility to not cheat is solely on the people within the relationship.

SuspiciousEchidna · 2022-11-26T19:16:56+00:00

If you knowingly and willingly sleep with a married person you're a horrible human being no ifs and buts.

ClaraBow01 · 2022-11-26T19:48:51+00:00

They are responsible for their own actions, just like the cheater is fully responsible for their own actions. The cheater should get the brunt of the blame and backlash as they made a commitment. The one who is cheated on with should receive criticism but not nearly to the same degree.

Title	People who knowingly have sex married people, how much backlash do they actually deserve?
Author	rockerroses
Upvotes	4
Comments	36
Date	November 24, 2022 8:55 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/z3uda5/people_who_knowingly_have_sex_married_people_how/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/people-who-knowingly-have-sex-married-people-how.1141983 https://theredarchive.com/post/1141983

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