What advice would you give to males today at these 3 stages: Pre-teen (shortly before being a teenager), teenager, 20s

Melkor7410 · 2023-03-16T17:07:34+00:00

Wrap it up, always.
Never date or go near crazy.
If crazy was hiding, leave as soon as you find out it's crazy.
Don't change yourself to impress others.

None of these are age-specific.

Suspicious-Sleep5227 · 2023-03-16T19:55:50+00:00

Learn to be an excellent judge of character so that you can avoid crazy.

Go to a few divorce court proceedings before getting married.

HAnicetry214 · 2023-03-16T17:43:16+00:00

Focus on yourself. Make sure your mental and physical health is in good condition. You want to just absolutely go all out one night and drink and yourself? Thats fine. Its good to let off steam. Just dont make it a habit.

This applies to 20s. I dont go into before that cause it will make me angry.

WhereProgressIsMade · 2023-03-16T17:49:00+00:00

My son is 12. We've talked about what men find attractive in women and how that's different from what women tend to find attractive in men. So far I've gotten him lifting with me and joining me in some sports.

We've talked about what the better paying careers are and which ones he may be interested in. He's doing really well in school, so that makes things easier.

We've talked a little about how I think it would be good to pick a college in a metro area with the industry he's studying for and would want to live in long term. I'm try to set the stage to eventually talk about how Title IX makes it pretty risky to date in college, but once you graduate, if you're still in the area, you can probably still hang out with the off-campus college crowd a bit. Maybe finally ask out some gals that were potentials who are still in college. If he didn't want a family, it would be much easier to advise him on that end. But kids do best in a stable home with both parents, so doing the best I can within that.

Soon, I'll talk to him about not simping or white knighting and that you need to ignore most of the dating advice written by women and pay attention instead to what they actually react to with their actions. I've got an old book that would be a good intro on that subject and doesn't jump into the deep end so would probably be age appropriate soon. Eventually I'll talk to him about how to keep a woman attracted to you.

Standard-Broccoli107 · 2023-03-16T18:59:00+00:00

Preteen: You are valuable. Dont get involved in drama. Work hard, what you work on doesnt matter but the habits you form now lasts a lifetime.

Teen: do well in school. Get into a decent to high paying field, not what fulfills you. Ally yourself with good friends and dont drink with strangers.

20ies. This is just the start of your life. Take care of your body, if you gain weight now its hard to drop. Work hard now for easy 30ies.

SomebodyinAfrica · 2023-03-16T19:38:51+00:00

The same advice-
Keeping it in your pants keeps you out of trouble too.
Learn Accounting, take it if you're in school and it's an option.
Learn first-aid.
Most jobs turn into paperwork and managing people at some point, learn how to early.
Being the guy people trust and cooperate with is better than being the guy everyone fears.
Beware sob-stories.
Be Good.
Don't expect other people to be good.
Read through, think through and get legal advice on contracts before you sign them.
Don't smoke cigarettes - you probably will, I did too, but boy is it a waste of money.
New friends are silver, but old friends are gold.
Join a boxing gym.

Dapper_Platform_1222 · 2023-03-16T20:47:17+00:00

Pre-Teen: Find something you enjoy doing that isn't drugs and alcohol.

Teenager: You should be studying 1-2 hours every single day. Unfortunately a lot of your life is decided at this age. I wasn't even fully aware as a teenager, but for some reason the world has decided that it's a great time to decide whether you're going to be a CEO or a ditch digger.

20's: Enjoy your 20's. Find your passion and purpose. If you like school now is the time for grad school. You can always go later but your lifetime earnings are going to be a lot higher if you go now. I didn't have children in my 20s, but that's not saying it's the wrong way. Just think about it.

Poutypigeon21 · 2023-03-16T22:27:46+00:00

Learn red pill content and female nature/psychology.

jjj2576 · 2023-03-16T17:17:45+00:00

Pre-Teen… -This is out of my area of expertise. My teaching background is for MS/HS.

Teen… -Lift

-Say Less. Listen More.

-It takes less effort to Destroy, than to Create.

-Consider what ideals you value.

20s… -Read TRM (and other RP core texts)

-Lift

-Learn how to pass shit tests.

-Know your Heart’s Purpose/Mission

-Pursue Fulfillment over Joy— Joy will always follow Fulfillment.

Capable-Raccoon-6371 · 2023-03-16T20:36:10+00:00

Don't have children. Don't put yourself in a position where having children is a possibility. Get a vasectomy. Become homosexual. Don't get married. Your parents are the only ones who genuinely love you maybe, the rest of humanity only wants to take from you.

This advice is for all ages.

Malcmsex · 2023-03-16T22:23:39+00:00

Preteen: do anything and everything.
Teenager: do anything, everything and everyone.
20s: COPE

Jukingku22 · 2023-03-16T22:27:45+00:00

Your better then women. Might or might not be true, but this is the mentality that got me through years of being degraded for being a man

Snackasm · 2023-03-17T08:36:37+00:00

Drink beer Don't care about others opinions The more offensive it is the funnier it is If they don't like you, tough shit don't change Always have a sense of humor Don't be a little bitch Religion is bullshit Epstein didn't kill himself

orussell03 · 2023-03-16T17:05:18+00:00

Read the manipulated man.
Go Dutch on EVERYTHING. From chorus to expenses.
Educate yourself on marital laws, assets division, child support.
DON'T sign the dotted line.
Do what they do, Not as they ask you to do. Fully indulge in self-care.
Value your $s. They are your sweat and blood. Protect your $ at all costs.

Stovepipe-Guy · 2023-03-16T18:07:47+00:00

Get a six pack and work on skills that improve you as a men,

RabidusRex · 2023-03-16T21:45:46+00:00

My advice would break reddit's policies.

but I'll try....

If anyone picks on you physically speaking, break their arm, or their jaw, their leg, or snap their wrist. Put them in the hospital. People won't fuck with you if you fight back. Do it hard.
Don't put so much weight on what other people think of you. What you think about yourself is infinitely more important.
If there are values in your society / culture that doesn't serve you (or your loved ones), reject them, and make your own values. and stick to them. Society does not have your best interest in mind.

Nihi1986 · 2023-03-16T22:05:23+00:00

Pre teen: develop healthy habits and have fun. Teenager: don't worry about almost anything because you won't give a crap about all of that in just a few years. Focus on your self. 20's: if you did it right now it's when you can have a lot of fun. Avoid crazy and start caring about your health so you can enjoy your 30's and even your 40's. You probably shouldn't get married but that's up to you, at the very least, be sure you are marrying someone compatible and keep ALWAYS in mind that divorces happen, a lot, so plan ahead just in case.

ggihhpy · 2023-03-16T22:19:10+00:00

1) don’t waste your time in a bad relationship. I wasted a decade trying to fix a very manipulative person.

2) don’t waste your money in bars and restaurants. It’s just food.

3) Invest in an index fund. Don’t chase that next great stock. Realize that people who study finance for a living get it more wrong than right. That sure thing you think you’re seeing that no one else can see is just your arrogance getting in the way of reality. Any hunch you have is already priced into a stock. You may do well occasionally or even at first but it’s more likely than not that you’ll underperform the index.

4) it’s not for everyone, but some of the happiest men I’ve seen got married early, raised the kids together for awhile, got divorced, date with no expectations of marriage or kids. They see the kids every other week then they have free time to do whatever when the ex has the kids. It can be amicable and mutually beneficial.

5) I used to travel for leisure a lot. Used to eat at really fancy restaurants. I have a toddler right now and feel like I’m happier than I have ever been.

von-schlitterbahn · 2023-03-16T22:22:06+00:00

Never rely on what you think you know. Constantly challenge yourself. Learning is the biggest key to life. Think of time like a river with small pools on the sides to rest. Those are comfort zones, you can never get out of the water, you poop & pee, how long before it becomes toxic, never stay in a comfort zone too long. You are always growing, even when you get past 50. you are always in a race, pace yourself.

freeball_1 · 2023-03-16T22:25:24+00:00

Use condoms 100% of the time. Ask for photo ID before having sex if you're not 100% sure she's at least 30. Strongly Consider getting consent in writing. Once you're 18 never date anyone below 18.

I do really like the part about crazy I'll have to add that to what I've already taught my kids

This is the advice that I actually gave my son

Terrible_Departure90 · 2023-03-16T22:29:05+00:00

Start to develop a frame/mindset that you operate in. Let this be your guiding morals and principles. Start early so you can be comfortable within this frame/mindset

CharlieUpATree · 2023-03-16T22:43:38+00:00

Be kind to others, focus on improving yourself, and you are #1 first in all decisions

Royal_IDunno · 2023-03-16T22:48:42+00:00

Never take a feminist seriously and never apologise to feminists when you prove them wrong.

The_Bearded_Cyclist · 2023-03-16T22:50:55+00:00

Don't fuck random just because you're horny.

Don't date someone unless you see it leading somewhere.

Always wrap it and dispose of it after yourself.

Focus on your fitness, your knowledge and your grind before on girls and partying.

Don't say yes to someone if it means saying no to yourself.

If its not fuck yes then it's fuck no.

Men need to support men.

Don't fuck/date crazy.

If you see a red flag don't make excuses make exits

Don't treat her like a queen if she doesn't treat you like a king.

Feminism does not care about you in the slightest.

Always get a prenup.

Never accept being made to feel ashamed for knowing your worth and having standards

It's better to be single and feel lonely than in a relationship and miserable.

Have 3 hobbies. One you can make money from, One you can share with others and one just for yourself.

Never love something so much that you can't walk away when it becomes toxic in your life.

Never place a woman (or anyone) on a pedestal.

Your prime is in your 30s and up.

When you finish highschool travel for at least a year as simply as possible, cycle, hike, backpack. Rely on yourself, discover who you are and want to be and have adventures. Then move forward.

If someone shows you who they truly are... Believe them.

No one on their deathbed ever said "I wish I'd gone to the office more"

All (you know) are crazy, it's just to varying degrees.

Work to live, not live to work.

Nothing good ever happens after 10pm when you're out on a night on the town.

If all her ex's were toxic then chances are they weren't the toxic ones in the relationship.

Listen to someone's actions, not their words.

Adm8792 · 2023-03-16T23:34:54+00:00

Learn patience. learn to be the driver of your emotions, learn to never give those keys to anyone in any situation ever. And probably don’t have sex I know I know but fuck could fuck you in the end

Typical-Mud8641 · 2023-03-16T23:46:32+00:00

Pre-teen, B/C grades(just good enough to keep you on college track, don’t sweat it too much) / fun (skateboarding, team sports, swimming) Teenager grades(As) fitness (natty), get comfortable talking to girls (YouTubers like Tusk, Kill your inner loser, more plates more dates, Todd Valentine) don’t worry to much about getting laid but if you do condoms always. Twenties college, save / invest cash, cheap dates only (Netflix & chill, picnic, walks) do NOT buy dinner, do NOT buy drinks, avoid having sex with chicks that have been drinking or doing drugs, make as many friends as you can (frats, team sports, clubs). All ages no social media, or locked. Anyone snitches on you or bullies you cut them and never let them back in. If you have a poor family or financial situation deal with that before anything else, talk to anyone you think you can trust, counselor, teacher, priest, cop, use your gut but look for pretty quick and steady results. Good luck, it’s tough out there, I don’t envy your generation

AimlessFacade · 2023-03-17T00:22:33+00:00

Everybody's gonna let you down, given the opportunity. Make sure you have safeguards in place, a strong sense of morality and great independance skills for when it does happen.

Also, find a lawyer to keep on hand.

Mandarni · 2023-03-17T00:54:23+00:00

Honestly, I think Jordan Peterson's 12 rules apply to all stages of life, so yeah, those.

Don't take shit, don't give shit, be fair to those who are fair to you. Never feel that you owe shit to other people. You owe it to yourself to do your best and take responsibility for yourself.

And stay away from crazy people.

king-of-the-light · 2023-03-17T01:11:52+00:00

Remember to floss Don't skip gym Don't get married

IR0NxLEGEND · 2023-03-17T01:23:14+00:00

Your world is small in high school and things that seem like big deals simply aren’t. Don’t ever let someone give you shit for taking care of yourself, physically mentally and spiritually. Therapy was a huge eye opener for me when I started at 15. Don’t ever take a girls word that she is on birth control. Drinking and drugs need to be treated with respect like a firearm. They’re not inherently bad but can be used in bad ways. Your parents advice is probably good advice. Don’t be afraid to cry in front of people, it’s a natural, human thing to do. Surround yourself with good people. Lastly, embrace the struggle that is life. If you aren’t struggling you aren’t truly living, you are simply existing.

angrybab00n · 2023-03-17T02:07:54+00:00

Asexuality is the way, is what I'd tell them, honestly. Relationships have become a waste of time and absolutely detrimental to any parties involved.

SocialSanityy · 2023-03-17T02:16:43+00:00

Thank y’all for this , I’m going to take all of these into account

13donor · 2023-03-17T02:59:33+00:00

Love Melkor….my mom always told me if you meet a crazy while your dating run and never look back….and it runs in families.

hendrixski · 2023-03-17T03:40:42+00:00

My advice is not about girls, it's about men's issues at each age.

Preteen - learn to describe your emotions without ever letting people think you're angry. For some reason people have a fetish for punishing "angry boys". Don't be"angry" learn to tell others a much more specific emotion.

Teenager - here's how you can avoid the draft... And remember that draft age is always raised whenever it's announced so keep these options available to you until your late 30s.

20s - take out a loan and get a child through a surrogate. Fatherhood is amazing but custody court is so bad that it's often suicide-inducing. Thus you should have a kid but have a kid that nobody can ever take away from you.

Pessimist001 · 2023-03-17T03:47:26+00:00

Great advice, men. Glad we have a space on the internet for real advice for men which is increasingly disappearing and actively being suppressed.

FearlessFly9785 · 2023-03-17T05:00:27+00:00

It's okay to have a weakness... But it's not okay to stay in that weakness...

yamheisenberg · 2023-03-17T05:08:20+00:00

Appreciate your family, be kind but not too nice that people will walk over you, learn to say no, work hard.

Character_Pirate_618 · 2023-03-17T05:29:14+00:00

Focus on your education and career. Marriage is how women financially and physically enslave men, so don't. If you don't have proof of sexual consent, you're as good as guilty in the eyes of the man-hating courts. Never give a woman legal or financial power over your life.

Wadeem53 · 2023-03-17T05:44:26+00:00

Don't be forced into anything, listen to yourself, do what you like to do, dont comply with all roles and expectations imposed by others

Individual_Worry_495 · 2023-03-17T06:48:34+00:00

Don't have kids, get woodsy survival training and learn to hunt.

sada_hua_aam · 2023-03-17T07:03:43+00:00

Pre teen and teenager: Marks do matter, college name does matter.

Study well, don't procrastinate.

somethingwitty94 · 2023-03-17T09:55:37+00:00

Answer for all three. Be kind to yourself and oem who you are.

djc_tech · 2023-03-17T11:37:03+00:00

Build wealth, find your identity. Find your passion and do it, don’t change for any woman and always be you.

The only one you can trust is your dog

Throwawaydhxj · 2023-03-17T12:23:26+00:00

At the pre-teen age you should explore all the possible thing you would like to do in the future (hobbies and possible career wise) and would make you money. While most people tell you that money is not the key to happiness i will tell you that not having enough to live comfortably will defenetly make you less happy, even miserable.

Grind, grind and grind. If you manage to start at an early age its just a massive lead on life. If you havent put any work into your life at mid 20s you will notice how everybody is going on with life while you just waste it. Starting the grind in your mid 20s while getting rid of your bad habbits is hella hard.

Dont worry about finding a woman. The right woman will come to you on your journey.

greebo392 · 2023-03-17T15:59:26+00:00

pre-teen:

- Don't ever let anyone tell you that your feelings are wrong and that you will not reach your goals.

teenager:

- your life might be confusing. But if you stay honest and keep your friends close you will grow through it.

20s:

- choose your friends/partners wise. if you must be alone for a short period of time, it is better than being with people that harm you.

ViolentCommunication · 2023-03-17T16:05:56+00:00

Stay away from porn. That's it.

ConCreature_227 · 2023-03-17T22:25:31+00:00

Don't be sad, I missed GME too

Title	What advice would you give to males today at these 3 stages: Pre-teen (shortly before being a teenager), teenager, 20s
Author	Middle_Raisin_7481
Upvotes	88
Comments	79
Date	March 16, 2023 4:48 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/11szen1/what_advice_would_you_give_to_males_today_at/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/what-advice-would-you-give-to-males-today-at-these.1180631 https://theredarchive.com/post/1180631

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