What made you interested in Men’s rights in the first place?

househubbyintraining · 2023-07-15T03:15:46+00:00

feminist hypocrasy, and seeing the mistreatment of abused men at the hands of feminist organization.

WeEatBabies · 2023-07-15T03:36:50+00:00

The Duluth model of D.V. and how feminists use the proxy violence of the state to control men in relationships.

Current_Finding_4066 · 2023-07-15T08:34:23+00:00

Same as you, I grew up in a dysfunctional family. My mother is a narcissist who berated me about supposedly downtrodden women. My younger sister is one of the most vile people I have ever had the misfortune to meet. And her abusive behavior towards me was never condemned, even openly supported.

Then came the realization that I have been fed lies from the mainstream media. For instance, finding out that almost two thirds of university students are females. How is that possible if men have an advantage and we need programs to help women achieve higher education? (I do understand the situation in developing countries might be different).

I have also realized that violence against men is not being addressed, while we are bombarded by messages about how violence against women is the worst thing ever.

You need to be stupid or living in a bubble to not notice that men's issues are not being addressed.

SatrapisMaster69 · 2023-07-15T08:39:52+00:00

Seeing how normalised shitting on men and ignoring all of their gendered issues is really did the trick.

Educational_Bet_6606 · 2023-07-15T08:39:13+00:00

Seeing how girls can talk about guys, look at them, assault them, but guys can't do it to girls. This was in early high school.

SleeplessAndAnxious · 2023-07-15T08:37:06+00:00

My first gf was physically, mentally, emotionally and financially abusive. We started dating when we were both 18 so I was still developing myself and already was kind of stunted from being sheltered and growing up in an abusive household (my dad was abusive) so I didn't really understand that it wasn't normal in relationships.

My second gf I was with for 12 years, married at the end of our relationship nearly and got divorced soon after when the truth came out about her cheating. She'd been gaslighting me and mentally abusing me for the half year prior to that about her cheating.

Most of my family never really understood how bad it was what she put me through and still talked about her as if nothing had happened.

WhereProgressIsMade · 2023-07-15T03:34:15+00:00

Mostly I’m here to learn what issues boys and men are facing these days to help my son navigate it.

Drakin5 · 2023-07-15T03:17:53+00:00

In the Philippines, it's:

~~Circumcision~~ Male genital mutilation, duh.
RA 8353 and 9262 but no equivalents for male victims against female abusers.
No divorce bill here, but I've heard a lot of testimonies from unfaithful wives and soon to be wives. For me, my mom has been itchy to leave dad all because he couldn't be the one bringing in the cash.

There's also the issue about conscription and gross hypocrisy by most countries with regards to the 2022 Russian Invasion as the current benchmark.

I even discussed with a lawyer here before what would happen if the Philippines is under attack once the issue about the SCS/WPS dispute became a war. The lawyer said that the government has the power to call to arms, but I doubt that it would be a 50/50 call between men and women.

There's also the manual labor sectors where I find scarce amount of women working as plumbers, electricians, miners, cable installers, welders, garbage disposals, HVAC technicians, basically trade workers of all stripe. The only labor force that I found to have women more are electronics repair and spa massage.

Seriously, women are either cowards or ungrateful to get their hands physically dirty from all the oil, grime and, in some cases, blood stains just to keep our society well maintained.

Reasonable_Listen514 · 2023-07-15T10:47:27+00:00

At some point, I realized that everything I'd ever been told about women being some kind of marginalized or disadvantaged group simply did not match my observations and life experience.

Then I watched my dad get hammered in divorce. Then I enlisted and saw many friends have terrible marriages and have their wives use their female privledge to screw them over. Also had a friend falsely accused of SA and nearly have his life ruined based on nothing but the word of a proven liar. Plus, hearing news about all kinds of other injustices against men in the legal system.

Then I noticed that commercials, TV shows, media, etc always make women look good, and make men either evil, idiots, or weak and effeminate.

The more I read and study the topic, the more I see that society is trying to push females to the top, and holding males back. In school, in college, in the workforce. Boys and men have lost all of their spaces where they could associate amongst themselves, while at the same time, every school has clubs just for women, and have scholarships just for men. There is systemic misandry and gynocentrism everywhere in western society.

I'll leave it at that. I could write all night about this.

[deleted] · 2023-07-15T11:00:41+00:00

I used to be a feminist because I was genuinely convinced that women were some oppressed group. It wasn’t until I actually did some research and found out just how much I’ve been lied to and how much was hidden from me.

Lolocraft1 · 2023-07-15T04:07:29+00:00

I’m a man, stumbled upon this sub by hasard, stayed

coming2grips · 2023-07-15T05:05:44+00:00

Survival

Unpopularopinion341 · 2023-07-15T08:55:21+00:00

I'm a man

MrSaturn33 · 2023-07-15T03:49:52+00:00

Such a constructive, reasonable and balanced post.

You would never see a Feminist woman write something like this about men. Even if it followed the same basic line "there are some good men, but most men X Y Z..." it would be far more embellished, irrational, biting, defensive, and hostile.

shit-zen-giggles · 2023-07-15T03:11:30+00:00

pretty much exactly what you experienced, tbh.

Annual_Anxiety_4457 · 2023-07-15T05:31:11+00:00

I also had an abusive mother who was also progressive. I was also leftist for most of my life. However during therapy I learned to question the teachings and how to be angry at women. I used to be quite a doormat.

However questioning the teachings and being angry in liberal environments is the same as being fascist so I’ve been gradually been booted out from those communities. So then in became a MRA. It’s a gradual process that has happened over the past 10 years or so.

AnFGhoster · 2023-07-15T12:15:42+00:00

I started getting suspicious of some of feminism's arguments which seemed laced with double standards, was needlessly hostile towards men, and had a lot of contradictions.

Then in 2014 I was raped by my ex because I was hesitant to make our relationship sexual for religious reasons. To spite me after getting pregnant she sent me pictures of the...results of the abortion. In the moment I learned I was a father I learned I wasn't one anymore. She did it to wound me and fuck me did it. From my perspective, at the time, I believed I was responsible for getting someone killed. Doesn't matter which end of the PC v PL angle you're on just imagine it from my perspective and what it did to me. I came to terms with what happened and I went to seek help. I was smart enough to not come out right away about the pregnancy lest she find out and claim I raped her. I was learning very quickly.

I also learned that help services are fucking worthless. No, they were actively harmful.

"Sir, please leave the line open for actual cases."

"I don't understand, you say this involved a woman? Are you trying to confess?"

"Our service doesn't take on male cases."

Later in therapy:

"It doesn't count as sexual assault because the reason you said no was shallow. You were saying no because of the indoctrination of your religion and you're just repressed. It's normal to be confused by your first sexual encounter when you're raised in such an environment."

Not only did I find dismissal so insulting I realized that it doesn't fucking matter why I say no, all that matters is I did. After all, that's all it takes for women. Apparently, I was very alone in thinking so.

I also found that very ironically the people I was told would be great resources because they "understand" (Help services, counselors, therapists, trauma specialists, women in general) were horrid choices and the people I was told to avoid because they're "predatory" (Men in general, a priest, my friends in the services, an older male therapist) were the only ones who gave a flying fuck.

Women (and male feminists) finding out has only ever had horrible consequences and has always blown up in my face. Meanwhile men consistently helped or at least tried more often than not.

If I wasn't an MRA and anti-feminist right after it occurred I certainly was after all of that.

Wasteofoxyg3n · 2023-07-15T15:19:05+00:00

Being betrayed by multiple women I thought I could trust, constant bullying and slander at the hands of women, countless exposure to casual misoginy in online spaces, etc.

I started delving into redpill/blackpill stuff in my teens. After that, I read various statistics and ancedotes from different men and began to see a pattern. Eventually, I realized just how anti-male our society really is.

Vanriel · 2023-07-15T07:58:06+00:00

For me it was something that just happened naturally. I try to look at all sides of an argument or discussion before taking a side, and I noticed in secondary school that there was plenty of talk about women's rights, women empowerment women's disadvantages etc. But there was nothing about the issues that's men faced. Now as a man as well this felt..wrong? As by this point I had already got my backside slapped when walking home from town, already had an older women try to tongue me without my consent do I knew that something was wrong. So I went looking, and it was shocking how much information had not only not been made available to people but actively ignored or dismissed because it did not fit the narrative that was being pushed.

corporate_robot_dude · 2023-07-15T15:11:34+00:00

I think for me it's the struggles in the dating world. And since females liked to talk about dating more often, I used to mostly get feedback and advice from them. I used to be naive in following the standard societal narrative in terms of what was sold to us on the media and by corporations on what success is. But over time you start noticing something doesn't seem right, whether it's the various dellusions or double standards in place.

Societal values seems to be declining in general for both men and women. Good genuine people are being left behind or corrupted in favor of the loud and aggressive. There are many good women out there, but they either get wifed up quickly, or slowly become corrupted and jaded the more experience they get.

ConestogaCreek · 2023-07-15T16:23:25+00:00

Female coworkers and supervisors. Took me a while to realize that these were not just random people with bad attitude but rather constitute what is essentially a hate group.

amenacingballsack · 2023-07-15T06:08:03+00:00

Never thought women were oppressed in my lifetime. Both genders face unique difficulties, and to ignore the issues of one because the other had it worse in the past is stupid.

Of course this put me at odds with 21st century feminism, so I sought out a place with an opposing viewpoint.

I still view myself as supporting gender equality, and I think most people here do too. Since most of society is obsessed with women's issues both real (sexual assault, maternity leave/safety, access to birth control and abortion) and imagined (wage gap, "mansplaining," lack of perfectly proportional representation), I figured I should learn more about men's issues and make myself more of a "man's man" if you will.

ilovenumetal · 2023-07-15T16:06:00+00:00

I was 16 years old during the whole “kill all men” trend on TikTok, and that really opened my eyes to how much men are valued.

No_Reaction_2168 · 2023-07-15T16:38:53+00:00

I (M26) grew up in kind of an unconventional family where me and my father (M61) were essentially the more emotionally sensitive, introverted and philosophical kind and my mother (F56) and sister (F25) the socially adept go-getters. I love my mother and sister, but they are very different people. My dad and I are more alike in terms of personality, although I inherited most of my looks from my mother.

I think that by growing up in the family I did, it allowed me to form a bond with my father that most men can't relate to. He's never been afraid to show me how he really feels about things. I've seen him cry on numerous occasions and he has certainly proven that he cares about my sister and I.

I think it's that bond that made me hyper-aware of how other men in my immidiate surroundings were being treated. At thirteen years old, I already loathed the notion that men were not allowed to hit a woman under any circumstance whereas a woman could get away with it scot-free. I was always the rebellious kind and thought that, as I phrased it: "A vagina is no excuse to be an asshole.", and so I always hit back women who hit me first. If you don't want to fight, don't provoke, it's as simple as that. It's the way it works for us men too.

I dug deeper and deeper into the rabbit hole during the course of my teenage years on sites like YouTube, Reddit, Quora, and came to the conclusion that nobody really gives a shit about men, not even other men. I do, as one of the few, presumably because of the relationship I had and have with my dad. I think it's unfair to call all men potential rapists when my dad has shown me personally that there are good men out there. He's one of them. Sometimes I wish I could be more like him, but I am unfortunately way too prone to feeling anger and hatred to do so.

mcc9999 · 2023-07-15T18:24:45+00:00

For me it is feminist excess. Feminism has morphed into a hate movement vs. men. The MRM is the only thing pushing back on it. So here I am.

Warthog2023 · 2023-07-15T07:16:35+00:00

There were certainly some issues out there, such as the condemnation of masculine traits, conscription, or the lack of male mental health. But the biggest issue to me, and one that barely gets any attention, is circumcision. The strong prevalence of circumcision in our world and the lack of care anyone gives almost makes me believe we live in a simulated world. I just find it impossible to accept that half of the male population is missing a chunk of their penis and the world see's nothing emasculating or humiliating about it.

northseaview · 2023-07-15T11:51:36+00:00

I have long been a socialist and an egalitarian. I never bought into patriarchy theory, and in fact met a man-hating feminist quite young that convinced me that feminism had nothing in common with socialism. Nonetheless I did swallow the women have been discriminated throughout history hegemony, common in socialist circles and society in general. Despite this I noticed the common discrimination against men and treatment as cannon fodder bad guys and punchbags. Eventually I saw blogs and videos that challenged the women oppressed hegemony and cannot unsee the truth.

mattedak · 2023-07-15T17:35:23+00:00

Studying/ working in family law.

McGauth925 · 2023-07-15T18:09:33+00:00

I kept noticing that feminists and their sympathizers never talked about the sexism of women, nor the privileges that they hold. And, the overall hypocrisy of women who only talk about the sexism and privileges of men.

LADZ345_ · 2023-07-15T20:39:03+00:00

Am man, want rights. That simple

No-Desk560 · 2023-07-15T15:11:33+00:00

My father

AmbitionMysterious83 · 2023-07-15T16:05:13+00:00

I'm a therapist and I have male friends that have been abused so that's one of my passion projects

ApprehensiveMail8 · 2023-07-15T20:39:57+00:00

The wordpress blog "Toy Soldiers".

It was just one guy, I never met him IRL, I'm not even sure what his real name is (I think Jacob). He hasn't updated since 2020 and I hope he's okay and just focused on living a great life.

But it was about his experiences as a male rape survivor and there were posts from other survivors as well. And I found it because... well, quite frankly I was reading a lot of feminist stuff at the time and I just wanted the opinion of a male survivor.

I had heard about "MRAs" but believed the false press that it was just a bunch of immature "incels" fighting progress for no reason. That the rare male survivors would be greatful for all the help they received from feminists!

Umm... no.

TS was absolutely a survivor of some horrific things, done to him by both males and females. And he is/ was absolutely an MRA (although he didn't like labels) because feminists did NOT actually support male rape survivors except in their own imaginations and press.

Big_Chocolate_420 · 2023-07-15T23:07:00+00:00

the bias against boys and the favoured treatment of girls which was very unfair in my opinion.

this was in Kindergarten. But it really started with the movie "the red pill"

kirewes · 2023-07-15T23:13:56+00:00

Kind of a slow process for me. I was born in the 90s and In the 90s women were fighting for more equality I'm all for that. When the me too movement really got into the swing of things on Facebook. I was all for it as well until a fairly controversial case came up (can't remember what) where somebody was being accused of sexual assault. Up into this point in time I viewed the me too movement as a support group. There was no evidence at all that this guy did what he was accused of and the guy had a pretty tight alibi. I thought it was unfair and maybe that's just because I was falsely accused of sexual assault during gym in high school. I voiced my opinion and some of my closest friends we're against what I was saying. I brought forth purely logical arguments stating he may have done it or he may not have done it but there needs to be evidence in order to convict him. I told them people can be vindictive and will do or say anything to get revenge. Those friends that I thought were close apparently didn't like that. I've even seen one of those people last year when I was dropping off some fedex things. I said hello and was friendly but apparently she never forgot and was a cold-hearted bitch.

Please keep in mind that there are many times where I've seen many people claiming to be a men's rights activist and being misogynistic. I do not agree with this. In my opinion I am a men's rights activist and a feminist that is not a third wave feminist. Third wave feminism in my opinion is actually misandry behind a crumbling mask somehow held together by spit and duct tape. I believe in the equality between the sexes and as much as you can get. You cannot fully get full equality but you can come pretty damn close. The only quality you are not able to get is biological equality. Also please note when I speak about biological equality I'm not talking about biological mental capacities or tendencies.

If you haven't noticed already. I've had to explain my point of view because apparently not fully being on one side of the other is an anomaly. I'm a little bit pissed just bringing this subject up so let me just say this last bit. Innocent until proven guilty is the best policy and if you can't respect the fact that people are individuals and can form their own opinions then you need to go back to preschool.

CarHungry · 2023-07-16T01:19:22+00:00

I started to realize men are unequal to women when I was about 12-14 but feminism preaches "equality" with nothing to show for it. There just wasn't a place to discuss it back then, and complaining about anything as a boy or man, makes you look unmasculine and therefore ripe for social exclusion and maybe even violence in some cases.

stingermamabee2 · 2023-07-16T12:42:02+00:00

The same abusive family dynamic as well as my inherent distaste for other women. Call it internalized misogyny if you want, but I absolutely dislike women. So that dislike and the distrust in women I formed from my own family life let me to begin to notice parallels in the things people accused men of doing and what women were doing. My natural desire for equality started to say "well that doesn't sound fair" about a lot of things. As I grew into adulthood I took on her habits and became the abuser for a time until going into therapy to get to the bottom of it. I leapt into a rabbit hole of how the law works around each sex before and after divorce...and here we are.

Tldr abusive mother and a dislike for women and the unfair treatment of men

Stairwayunicorn · 2023-07-15T10:15:38+00:00

the dismissive attitude many seem to have towards MGM (infant circumcision)

Natsuki98 · 2023-07-15T05:04:49+00:00

I don't even remember. I think it had to do with circumcision and maybe something else. I kinda just stumbled onto this subreddit and rolled with it.

Character-Finish-502 · 2023-07-15T06:57:00+00:00

Resentment of women, honestly

lmaoyeahaha · 2023-07-16T02:11:51+00:00

My parents divorced when I was 5 so I always lived with my mom. I didn't have a strong role model in life, so I believed all the toxc masculinity/feminist talk.

When I got to age 15, life started becoming hell. Took me 5 years till I was 20 to realize why I cried every night and why I wanted to slit my wrists. I was in hell alone.

But as my mom said "I always succeed in what I set out to do". And so I did. I pulled myself out of that hell because no one was willing to help. Because all the feminist talk didn't work, it just made me hate myself even more.

While I was at my apsolute lowest, no one helped, so I helped myself. I fixed myself with pure mind power, while I had none left. It was the hardest thing I've ever done, but I did it. Now I enjoy life, I truly think I can't fall into that hell anymore, because I've kinda figured it all out.

To get to the point, I truly believe that all the feminist talk, mental health scamming, weak fathers, social media, sheltering, snowflake mindset, gender dysphoria, and "it's okay to be weak" is the reason why male suicide rates and male loneliness is so extremely high.

With me, I've been there in hell, and I got out, and now people are saying that I'm wrong, that I'm toxic and that I'm the bad guy? They weren't saying that when I was a sheel of a human being. How funny.

nathanv70 · 2023-07-16T03:00:23+00:00

Dad got divorced. Brother got divorced. Brother in law got divorced. I had a long time female friend tell me that I needed to get raped to understand what it was to be a woman - key note: I had been nothing but nice and good to her for years. I had no idea what men’s rights or MGTOW was until that last part which blew my mind.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happily married to a beautiful woman and we have 3 sons together and a small farm that’s coming up but damn, talk about me seriously updating/upgrading my vetting process for women in my life as seeing all that nastiness that others went through.

It sent me down a research rabbit hole where I dove into evolutionary psychology and then re-examined my entire life. So many things made more sense and the veil was lifted. It’s like another piece of the puzzle got put into place.

Significant_Onion119 · 2023-07-16T15:30:52+00:00

I’m not interested in men’s rights or feminism at this point. The only thing that I’m interested it’s why fathers lose custody over their children in divorce or whatever.

BigDaddyDeliciousD · 2023-07-16T16:03:56+00:00

I am part of anything that is mens rights related. I have been band and deleted for speaking the truth about what feminism really is and all about these days. I had no idea until my company's human resources department targeted me. I have been fully awake and talking shit ever since.

crippledhermit · 2023-07-17T00:35:06+00:00

Wondered if other guys are as badly traumatized as I am.

DrewYetti · 2023-07-21T15:43:51+00:00

For me, women misusing and abusing their rights for their own benefit at the expense of men without being held accountable or responsible. For example, The Brian Banks Story.

Title	What made you interested in Men’s rights in the first place?
Author	monkeyduke
Upvotes	122
Comments	77
Date	July 15, 2023 2:04 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/14zz1wo/what_made_you_interested_in_mens_rights_in_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/what-made-you-interested-in-mens-rights-in-the.1225313 https://theredarchive.com/post/1225313

Comments