Men realize they were being low value when women need to teach them how to be good boyfriends. Some men decide to push it and don’t improve. It’s not until after the woman gives him 4,5,6, 10 chances and finally breaks up with him that he realizes it was a dealbreaker all that time.

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Men won’t even want that woman back because she put up with him when he was low value. It’s a reminder of how he was before. Now that he is properly trained, he is seeing women who would not have involved themselves at all with him unless he already was already at that higher value. These new women do not know his former self and would not have settled for it at all from the get-go anyway.

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It seems that teaching men anything about relationships, and being ‘giving’ of advice of that type, automatically makes the female ‘teacher’ low value on principle. Because why would a high value woman even consider interacting with such an uneducated man?

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A woman might still be figuring out her boundaries so that’s why she gets tangled up with men before realizing what she needed wasn’t there or that he could not or would not give it to her. I propose that women extend the ‘talking’ period for this reason. Non-monogamous talking. Platonic only. If he has sex with other women through this phase, who cares. They are banging his uneducated version. Really find out if he can offer you what you need (and learn what your needs are!) because if you get involved too soon, it may be too late to walk away and recover. Deal breakers are easier to follow when you’re not already involved.

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That being said, a woman cannot stress or talk a man into doing something. She are not his mother. His relationship with women started with his family and women in his community so that is where to watch. If he is not a generous man or a protective giver then that is his Nature. If a woman wants to be treated like a Queen she has to find a man who Likes pampering or taking care of her needs. He has to do it because he Likes it, not because it is a dealbreaker to be in a relationship.

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When men learn after women break up with them it’s because they learned their lack of care was a dealbreaker on some issue. Those are the types of men looking for the lowest bar they can meet and still get in a relationship. They will probably make the next girl just as miserable and unfulfilled unless she is lower value / lower maintenance. When men say they don’t like high maintenance women they mean they don’t want to improve themselves to reach to her level. High value takes investment and maintenance. He wants a Giver who will increase his own value and pleasure without investing any of his own. The term ‘starter wife’ has been thrown around a bit...though it is hard to say if all of them have actually even been married