[FR] First approach ever...thank you Seddit...so much.

Tom_Wheeler · 2012-07-07T22:49:56+00:00

This brought joy to my day. Thank you.

ol_greggory · 2012-07-08T00:17:02+00:00

Start a trend of this. Start striking up convos with cuties everywhere you go. Master that shit!

throwawayKino · 2012-07-08T03:52:58+00:00

"This went on for over an hour"

"Her response? Absolutely"

Ah my heart.. feels warmer. Had to lay down from smiling too much for a sec there because I was in a similiar position before(sat in the car forever, drove off for like 2 seconds then said "fuck it"). Great stuff man!

maybe_I_am517 · 2012-07-07T23:52:11+00:00

happy for you bro. live the dream

toughluck1 · 2012-07-07T23:52:07+00:00

I like this but please don't invest emotionally in this girl. It might work out and it might not.

iznou · 2012-07-08T03:30:56+00:00

It was that fucking easy?

Yes, it is that easy. However you need to recognize that the reason it was that easy was YOU WERE MOTIVATED and TOOK PLEASURE in the activity. After a few more approaches, there won't be the same novelty, the same feeling of conquering your fears (awesome work btw). You will have to find NEW motivation, perhaps in some area of your life unrelated to women, in order to have the same effect. And the pleasure in seduction will change, maybe even recede, until you figure out what makes you SATISFIED, as a person with a unique and developing sexual identity.

If you do not heed these words you may find yourself in choppy waters with a seeming lack of direction. You may fail and instead of gaining valuable wisdom from your failure, you may mistakenly attribute it to some lack of "technique" or "game", some aspect of your ego (appearance, status) that was not good enough, or god forbid, start to hate women!

I am not saying that game is not real, of course it's real, and it's FUN that's why they call it game! But if you stop taking pleasure in the game you will eventually stop learning, stop changing, and you will stagnate.

RonTheRedditor · 2012-07-08T04:12:55+00:00

You, sir, are a beacon of light to lost ships searching for harbor, ships full of those with AA. Happy for you man.

Now make this the best date of your life.

2012-07-08T03:02:32+00:00

:). Just watch out for the one-itis, and have fun!

Bunabayashi · 2012-07-07T22:24:59+00:00

Nice job man, that's awesome

Timlikesturtles · 2012-07-08T04:55:35+00:00

I loved this FR up until the last line:

I just want a girl to call my own.

Look man, you seem like a great guy, but most desirable girls won't want anything to do with someone who is not content with themselves. This line implies neediness, because it suggests that you can't be satisfied unless there is a girl in your life. It definitely took balls to man up and ask her out, but if you flood her with texts and give them impression that you don't have enough other things going on in your life, then she will sense this.

Don't over-think your next step, though. If I were you I would text her in a day or two saying something along the lines of, "Hey there is a cool [place/event] that I want to check out, would you like to join?". This is generally effective because it suggests that you are doing something that YOU want to do anyway, and that she does not already have power over you and is affecting how you're going to schedule your days.

Like someone else already mentioned, I would also try not to get too emotionally invested because this gives off a bad impression as well. Have an abundance mindset, because if you realize that there are truly are plenty of fish in the sea, then you will put less pressure on yourself in interaction with her and be able to more freely express yourself.

NothingButTheSky · 2012-07-08T05:16:55+00:00

I did my first approach and got turned down. But fuck it still feels good to make progress! Congrats man

endporn · 2012-07-08T09:43:42+00:00

Some day, you may even do the initiating.

guitar3000 · 2012-07-08T10:35:26+00:00

Wow, I am overwhelmed by the positive responses. Thank you all.

guitar3000 · 2012-07-08T05:36:14+00:00

Same exact thought went through my head. But I chickened out...

Anakeroo · 2012-07-08T06:11:31+00:00

I'm happy for you man, I really am ^{^}

But, it looks to me as if she was the one who approached you, and you were the one who escalated. It's all good though, because AA was a HUGE problem of mine. Try just going to the mall or a park or something and saying hi to anybody and everybody you see (even just making eye contact and smiling helps), it's a good way to get yourself accustomed to interacting with total strangers, even if only for a short time.

Good luck, my friend :]

bluechair6 · 2012-07-08T10:38:54+00:00

I have one question that's really bothering me. What does AA stand for?

Sorry I am new to this subreddit.

2012-07-08T13:01:52+00:00

This is good, you've turned a corner in life. Remember though, there is a time to emotionally invest, after you know whether or not she's a psycho.

Thanks though, you've reminded me why pick up is good, it helps the men in our society undo so much anxiety. It's a very positive thing. Your story reminds me of my own.

JPKestrel · 2012-07-08T05:34:42+00:00

Well done mate! If that was me you could guarantee she'd have a boyfriend and I would have wasted over an hour and bought stuff I didn't want! Lol congrats!

blickar · 2012-07-08T05:37:59+00:00

This was a nice approach. I will remember to wear a shirt with a band name on it.

2012-07-08T06:23:46+00:00

Good job man! I'm trying this out tomorrow. Just don't get too attached. You are a man on a mission. Stick to it.

Naga14 · 2012-07-08T09:29:49+00:00

Congrats! No matter how much you like this girl, the best thing you can do to increase your chances with her is meet more women. Having more women that you are talking with and dating makes you better with each individual relationship. It changes your personality and your level of neediness.

tyrrhena · 2012-07-08T10:58:23+00:00

Logged in to upvote. Go get em you little rascal tussles your hair

Rogan-Josh · 2012-07-08T15:11:15+00:00

What was the band on your shirt?

2012-07-08T04:57:31+00:00

NuclearPotatoes · 2012-07-08T03:59:01+00:00

:'-)

Kubasaki · 2012-07-08T04:09:16+00:00

AWESOME. Congratulations man :) I feel your joy, and still haven't even had my first approach yet. But it definitely helps hearing about more first approaches, good or bad. MOAR

2012-07-08T07:03:07+00:00

hey, there it is! Congrats man

riotingchimps · 2012-07-08T09:36:24+00:00

AWESOME WOOHOOO. well done. "Hey, I don't normally do this...but I think you're really cute. Do you wanna grab some coffee or hangout sometime?" IS THE FUCKING PERFECT WAY TO GET A YES FROM THE LARGEST PERCENTAGE OF GIRLS. accompanied by chemistry, especially.

wtk · 2012-07-08T11:16:30+00:00

Good job. I really think this is task for todays dads. Back in the old days they were teaching kids to hunt, now they should make you be sure it's completely normal to pick up beautiful chicks. My dad didn't teach me that, but I'm sure I'll make my kid believe that, be socially open and never see problem in speaking with any hot girl or anybody he wants to talk.

CJ090 · 2012-07-08T14:27:07+00:00

Dude I think you may be my twin only two years older. I was in the EXACT situation from only getting girls by circumstance to the nerve wracking time that I tried that first approach where I almost pussied out and then sent back in. We're on the same page brother, good shit.

Kiwispam84 · 2012-07-08T15:41:32+00:00

Awesome. I've been bummed about not approaching a couple of girls Friday night, and this was really motivational. I like the description of the dialogue with yourself!

illusiveab · 2012-07-08T17:07:54+00:00

Seddit, thank you. Without this place I would never of had the confidence to ever do this. I beat the shit out of my fear, manned up, and got shit done. Thank you. To anyone experiencing AA, if I can do this, YOU CAN. The only fucking thing holding you back is yourself. You can't live your life in fear.

This is why we're here.

ulookmad · 2012-07-08T18:31:37+00:00

Take this feeling that you have now and use that as momentum man. You completed your goal and you're the man. I would wait a day and then text her starting with something you guys talked about then plan for your date

edbenz · 2012-07-08T18:34:31+00:00

I did the same thing on my only approach so far. I was in a library, spotted her, took a few minutes to let my heart rate drop, then went in. I was successful by some measure, but it didn't work out because she was way too into this other dude so she really didn't give me a chance. Don't be too quick to emotionally invest in this girl, but don't be afraid of getting your heart broken either.

blitzkr1eg · 2012-07-08T19:18:19+00:00

So you still have not approached her: "She comes over and asks if I need anything"

creativebaconmayhem · 2012-07-09T06:31:09+00:00

Good for you man. This is the single step to begin the journey of a lifetime. Your post was an awesome description of what AA can feel like at its worst.

HollywoodLiontamer · 2012-07-08T01:00:09+00:00

Congrats! Now you're gonna discover that numbers are practically useless.

Title	[FR] First approach ever...thank you Seddit...so much.
Author	guitar3000
Upvotes	325
Comments	59
Date	July 7, 2012 10:17 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/w725o/fr_first_approach_everthank_you_sedditso_much/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/fr-first-approach-everthank-you-sedditso-much.1335289 https://theredarchive.com/post/1335289

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