What do you do when women are bullying you at a party? (How do you disarm asshole chicks?)

troyv21 · 2016-06-29T10:23:16+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Woujo · 2016-06-29T14:19:37+00:00

Usually girls randomly act like assholes to test you. You can easily defeat these shit tests by acting like you don't even hear them, like it's bleating coming from a worm that isn't your time. A lot of people here think the right answer to a "shit test" is a witty comeback, but if the girl is just being a fucking asshole she doesn't deserve a witty comeback. I do a move called "go cold." If you're interacting with a girl and she acts shitty, I just immediately pretend I got distracted by something else and ignore her. That's a much more painful burn than any "comeback" I can come up with. If a guy was saying that I would fight them but not girls.

Girls like that are usually emotionally unstable and if you "alpha" them right (i.e., ignore their stupid insults), they get turned on by you, but they are also shitheads so y ou should probably just stay away.

ThrowawayPUA · 2016-06-29T13:49:59+00:00

You have to show you're well calibrated socially and they aren't. And you have to shut it down fast, in front of other people who will see they are acting antisocially.

"Hey that was bitchy. I love bitchy! We can go out and be bitchy together! It will be just like that movie 'Mean Girls.' Hey look everyone, she's going to perform her bitchy act, watch this, it's awesome!"

DaygameCoach · 2016-06-29T15:23:15+00:00

Stop being reactive and letting people get to you. Otherwise, you are proving that you are what they think you are...someone whose buttons they can push. I don't think this was a shit test...unless they were attracted and wanted to see if you are real...so I disagree with banthas...but it should be treated similarly...read the sidebar help.

You could also have "yes and'ed" them...and ran with humor. Made it into a crazy but funny and obviously untrue story.

livingtribunal99 · 2016-06-29T15:45:32+00:00

Control the frame. If it isn't in a playful way, turn it into a playful way. If you can make them laugh, they'll lose control of the frame. Once ifs a playful/teasing frame, it will be difficult for them to drag it back into an aggressive/insulting frame. They'll look like total cunts. If they do force it back into an aggressive frame, point that out and make it obvious to everyone. They will struggle.

semaxX · 2016-06-29T09:43:47+00:00

Just tell them what you think. If they act like cunts the should get called out as cunts. Doesnt matter where you are.

Woujo · 2016-06-29T12:20:01+00:00

This should be in AskSeddit.

Warn them that their behavior is not appropriate. If it happens a second time, cut them loose. Don't respond to them or acknowledge them in anyway.

I had a girl from work saying shit about me to other colleagues and friends. I warned her and it continued so I cut her loose. This meant that I had to cut a lot of other friends loose but it was the best way. It was difficult at first, especially being new to a foreign country with no local language ability but it was best for the long run.

Respect yourself, set your boundaries, don't let anyone cross your boundaries

2016-06-29T15:03:43+00:00

How do you disarm asshole chicks?

Only an asshole can do this. You don't sound like you're ready to be an asshole.

Friendly_B · 2016-06-29T20:30:34+00:00

Be funny. Don't let them bother you, you're better than that.

Give no fucks.

Remember:
"People will LOVE me. People will HATE me. NEITHER of those outcomes have anything to DO with me."

Jaereth · 2016-06-29T20:50:45+00:00

Just like you handle any of these situations. Whether it be male or female. Bring them into your frame and disarm them?

In this case you must remain absolutely calm and just ask them point blank why they are trying to irritate you? Ask them if you offended them in any way and tell them you are here to have a good time and don't want to get involved in any negativity.

Also, quickly marginalize them. Immediately go talk to some other girls. Turn your back to them. Don't give their bad behavior any gravity over your mood or let it affect you having a good time in any way.

Don't insult them back or take any digs at them. Everyone saying this here is wrong. This is just you getting in there frame and is so wrong. Don't play their game.

hcarguy · 2016-06-29T15:40:25+00:00

There are chicks who will play with you to "test" you, and then there are insufferable cunts. The chicks who test you will do it in a more playful manner and you have to fire the same sort of stuff right back at them. The cunts, well they just need to be told that they are cunts. You can tell the difference by the extent they take things to. The girls you describe sounded like cunts, you should have told them that. But don't worry bro, these are all learning experiences and you're better off for next time.

tradersinsight · 2016-06-29T19:58:35+00:00

"Some guys have so-so looking dicks, but it doesn't mean that you don't like to gag on them. Please fuck off"

Best thing is to tell them to fuck off. Respect yourself first.

Republic_of_Ash · 2016-06-29T16:35:51+00:00

Dude, you either quickly find something to use as a witty come back or you walk away. They are pathetic and not worth your anger, which btw, you should look into because it's not healthy by the sounds of it. Good job restraining yourself though.

2016-06-29T17:24:45+00:00

they're doing this shit to test you.

ignore them at first. then laugh if they get all in your face and keep it up. if they get really close, and are saying something shitty, reach into your pocket, pull out our phone and open up your texts, scroll through a sec so it looks like you're doing something. mash out a message but dont hit send. then look back up and completely change the subject.

remember, you're above the bullshit. when you respond, you're entering their frame.

IANAPUA_Yet · 2016-06-29T17:58:20+00:00

The best way to deal with jerks (of any gender) is to recognize what's underneath it. At its core, it's all just an expression of social immaturity. If it goes past the point of being harmless fun, start responding with a sympathetic, "Really? This is how you were raised to behave? That's sad," mindset.

V4refugee · 2016-06-29T19:26:36+00:00

Don't let it get to you. Push her to say meaner and meaner things. Wait for enough people to see how much of a bitch she is being. When the time is right you say, "Wow, that's a pretty fucked up way to treat people". Now either everyone will take your side or you just realized that you are hanging out around really shitty people and move on with your life.

YamFor · 2016-06-29T20:09:35+00:00

I saw one kid in the club who this was happening to and basically played it off like a boss and was my hero for that day.

He basically said really loudly stop flirting with me in a joking manor and did that kind of feisty cat paw kind claw scratching thing in the air and had people laughing off the whole situation. The girls were visibly annoyed at how he handled it so well.

I was impressed

soskk · 2016-06-29T20:24:20+00:00

I answer most teasing with a grin and carry on with my business. It's generally disarming to the attacker.

More often than not... They persist and I comment that while I love the attention their focus should be on their own insecurities then IGNORE their attacks but don't AVOID them physically. If they're around someone or something you want to interact with, go for it but pretend they don't exist. Nothing pisses people off more than making them feel insignificant. The difference between coming off as shy; avoiding things, and confident; dismissing things, is holding frame. Smile and go about your business. Anyone who persists with talking shit to someone who is clearly detached from a situation gives ample opportunity to make them look like an ass.

Personal Pro tip: If things escalate to full blown bitch status I give girls new names while making them feel dejected and unimportant. I don't care if shes Becky, I'm going to ask Amanda why she's in such a shitty mood tonight. Smile and be aloof. It's infuriating for them and extremely entertaining for you.

PepelePeaux · 2016-06-29T22:30:16+00:00

Tell em their hands are wrinkly...trust me. She may not cry then but she will when she gets home

Don_Keydick · 2016-06-29T23:43:19+00:00

I'd probably say 'You guys are lame' and walk away and give them a 'wtf' look.

BrettEllisDotNet · 2016-06-30T02:09:01+00:00

"oh is that what you say to try and put people off?"

"YOu know you can't make yourself feel better about yourself by trying to drag others down, right?"

"I have too much self-worth and self-esteem for you to try and rattle me. Keep trying though, I'm enjoying your attention"

I wouldn't even hang out with cunts like that. If that's the calibre of people you hang out with, then upgrade your social circle bro. Even if they're friends of friends - Your friends allow those people in, and you need to decide if that's who you want to become (you are the average of the 5 people you spend most time with).

SmoothPrimal · 2016-06-30T09:24:17+00:00

Walk away? The moment a girl shows attitude I know I don't want to be involved with them whatsoever, coming up with a comeback is pointless because they have already disqualified themselves.

Jaereth · 2016-06-29T15:44:25+00:00

If you respond to them, try to come up with a snappy come-back, get pissed off, etc. then you are essentially just letting them get to you. Tell them clearly that their behavior isn't acceptable, and you just came to the party to chill. If they continue to berate you, then just completely ignore them until they go away.

They're just assholes. They don't deserve your attention, and it's not worth getting pissed off at about it.

Dont_Berlong_Here · 2016-06-29T15:34:56+00:00

My default way of dealing with shit-tests: shrug it off and continue whatever you were doing. Don't let that shit bother you, you're better than that pettiness.

JackGetsIt · 2016-06-29T18:04:07+00:00

So after reading through this thread I see 4 variants on how to approach this.

1.Agree and Amplify, or out asshole them.

This will only work if you're the top dog at the party and/or prepared to go to war.

2.Ignore

This will backfire if they persist.

3.Take the high ground. "You're both being disrespectful, please stop."

This will backfire if they persist. This won't work on illogical or emotional people (I.e most women)

4.Be witty

Not everyone can do this due lack of intellect and or mindfulness.

So I really don't have any advice to you OP beyond build more social status and build a better wit.

Personally if I wasn't the top dog at the party or didn't have the wit (most of the time I don't). I would just move onto another set of girls and in the future build better conections so that other girls are facilitating you meeting their friends not defending their friends from you so aggressively (light friendship defense is actually a really good thing!). Also, last tip. Don't let your anger get involved. It will blind you from executing the right play in these situations.

juloxx · 2016-06-29T16:05:41+00:00

"When I need an overweight girls opinion I will ask you"

or

"thank god i only care what attractive girls think"

Should get them pretty flustered for the rest of the night

jojothecasper · 2016-06-29T14:46:26+00:00

"Are you drunk?" Should do the trick nicely

Lsegundo · 2016-06-29T16:17:27+00:00

Tell them they remind of you of the girls from Mean Girls, but at least Lindsay Lohan has a voice for singing

thevidyy · 2016-06-29T17:29:44+00:00

"And you look like {insert fat or ugly celebrity she may or may not resemble}. What's your point?"

bobvex · 2016-06-29T18:39:59+00:00

This happened to an acquaintance I knew back in the day. Girls were making fun of him, telling him that he wished he could have girls as hot as them, generally being stuck up bitches. Finally he had enough, and says "bitch I wouldn't even rape you." She was brushing her teeth with his dick 2 hours later. I don't really condone that, but it worked for him, in that instance.

2016-06-29T20:57:01+00:00

[deleted]

What is this?

Title	What do you do when women are bullying you at a party? (How do you disarm asshole chicks?)
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	58
Comments	69
Date	June 29, 2016 9:34 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4qeo4w/what_do_you_do_when_women_are_bullying_you_at_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-do-you-do-when-women-are-bullying-you-at-a.1408897 https://theredarchive.com/post/1408897

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