I’m getting divorced

Marriedgames · 2024-04-17T02:55:03+00:00

Me too after 32 years. I feel your pain

drwormitis · 2024-04-16T15:49:31+00:00

Dude I feel your pain. My ex kicked me out of the house and filed for divorce, which went into effect THE DAY AFTER my 2nd anniversary. Yes, it hurts like hell. Don't listen to all these people telling you to get over it and move on. It is soooooo much more than that. The hurt, the loneliness, the abandonment, the feeling like a failure. I feel ALL OF IT. It does get better, but thinking about her and knowing you still love her and care about her, and all the good memories and intimate moments is brutal at times. Hang in there, bud. There are so many people going through the same thing. Peace and prayers.

BoeingA320neo-9 · 2024-04-16T14:16:05+00:00

Wait, fcuk the feelings and how you are feeling right now The ship has sailed, you have been left stranded

Now - First things first

Google Ben Hart And watch his latest videos

This is the benchmark of all what could go wrong during and after a divorce, including parental alienation and jail time

Stop crying after her I bet she doesn't care Now it's the time to make sure your future is secured Otherwise she is taking you to the cleaners

Wake up

Bearded1of2dallastx · 2024-04-15T22:41:14+00:00

It sucks. I did in 2023. Was totally caught off guard. Every day gets a little better but I still have moments of sadness.

probebeta · 2024-04-15T19:13:34+00:00

Not sure if this is the right thread for this but it could be. There is a tendency for both, you and her, to prove to each other about being better and wanting the other to regret making these choices. It's not helpful. When you have these thoughts redirect them to you and only you. She is gone and you won't take her back. It's only about you now and your kids if you have any.

RichardCleveland · 2024-04-15T18:15:06+00:00

*raises mug* Hang in there man, you will be OK.

Szimplacurt · 2024-04-15T14:52:51+00:00

Hey there, going through the same but I'm a bit past your initial stage.

You'll hear a lot right now that will sound like bullshit that you don't want to hear, but I promise it's well intended and true. You will move on, you will get better, life will get better etc. just hang in there. It's hard...and I too felt it was a monumental failure as well. But please don't let that stigma bother you. Try to find therapy, find activities you like and look within yourself to make yourself a better person. No one is perfect and there's always room for improvement. Don't let this identify you.

Rely on family and friends. They will get you through this. But more importantly take this time to really get to know you and stay strong.

KindheartednessFit40 · 2024-04-15T05:58:12+00:00

Rule no. 1 just remember you're gonna be okay your pain, and grief is unique to you don't let anyone take that away from you. Continue focusing on yourself and learn from the hurt, and you will grow focus on the bullshit and you're going to stagnate. Stay strong connect with friends talk with people meet new people (friends, do not jump into bed with anyone at this point it's just going to hurt you in the long run) find anything that has you getting out of your comfort zone and learning new things. You've got this mate keep your chin up.

You're gonna be okay 💙

qlintqlint · 2024-04-15T02:07:48+00:00

I'm about 2 months in since my wife left. I'll tell you people who have gone through it, lean on them. They understand the best. Those who haven't don't entirely know what to do with it. It's not their fault but it's true.

Just keep pushing forward. Let yourself be hurt and all the emotions right now. It's okay to feel everything but in time find a way to channel all of those emotions to better yourself. But for not just be kind to yourself and know people out there are there for you.

Hang in there, friend.

dday_throwaway3 · 2024-04-15T01:58:36+00:00

Read these two fundamental threads:

https://www.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1c2n16i/fundamentals_you_need_a_family_law_attorney/

https://www.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1c1u1g6/fundamentals_do_not_move_out/

You've got work to do on yourself. You've allowed your wife to control you since you got married, and she's emasculated you. If you want to change that, then there are two books you need to read and internalize:

* No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover. It will address your validation seeking behavior and covert contracts.

* When I Say No I Feel Guilty by Manuel J Smith. The Assertive Bill of Rights is written with you in mind.

After you read each chapter, I recommend you watch the corresponding chapter video on Rian Stone's YouTube channel. It will help you absorb and internalize the information faster. Don't skip ahead to the video - you need to read the book part first.

serenesweetpea · 2024-04-15T01:20:06+00:00

Have you told her this directly?

Throw_Her_Away123 · 2024-04-15T00:32:24+00:00

FTB. F that B. All you need to know

Bluerednaz · 2024-04-15T00:11:01+00:00

You have got to remember, it takes two to make it work. You didn’t marry yourself. And you know what is terrible but I feel is true? People think the grass is greener on the other side and with the state of the world, and everyone putting more value on themselves, the grass isn’t always greener.

Title	I’m getting divorced
Author	demeve
Upvotes	44
Comments	57
Date	April 14, 2024 11:46 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1c47w9z/im_getting_divorced/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/im-getting-divorced.1515128 https://theredarchive.com/post/1515128

Comments