I got crushed in my divorce. Going on five years, lost just about everything, completely lopsided judgment, and more.

Needless to say, it’s been demotivating. I’ve spent the past five years just surviving.

I finally am starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have a career opportunity that will allow me to dig out of the financial hole that the divorce put me in (I basically lost all my financial gains that I built from the age of 30-45, including my retirement). And even with her getting about 80-90% of the marital assets (truth), none of my marital debt was paid off, so I’m not even starting from scratch, I’m straying from behind.

Now, I have to work three times as hard for a year or two just to get back to “zero” where my debt is paid off. (Not to mention I haven’t even started to save for my kids colleges at this point, which is 8 years off).

It’s fucking knee capping.

I have been waiting for this moment for five (probably more like ten years) and I am in no mental/emotional shape to seize it. I’ve been trying just to survive for so long that it just seems like there is no was to “switch” my mindset.

I would love some advice/thoughts/perspective.

I have a good two years of hard work before I can come close to starting over again (at 46 years old) and I’ve gotta get moving.

I’d love to hear what everyone has done who were in similar situations.