Being nicely rejected hurts me more than just being flat out rejected

No-Ad8127 · 2025-10-03T14:44:57+00:00

In my opinion, flat out rejecting a man using your examples comes off as rude.

I don’t want to be disrespectful, and frankly, there’s too many men who would retaliate because of it.

DenverLabRat · 2025-10-03T14:33:34+00:00

I hear you. And it's easy to think that in the abstract especially for people who prefer direct communication styles. But it's also another thing to hear those things from someone you are attracted to.

On the other hand from women's perspective they're not sure how you are going to react. A lot of women have dealt with men who can't handle being turned down and either get angry or violent. So they choose to proceed with caution.

iamatwork24 · 2025-10-04T04:32:56+00:00

Deal with it dude. It’s not condescending, it’s a safety thing for them.

Midnightchickover · 2025-10-03T21:42:43+00:00

How is the other person supposed to do right in this scenario? The woman doesn’t seem to get any kind of fair chance at buffing someone’s admiration. She rudely rejects a guy she’s a bitch, but if she’s nice about it she’s being fake.

In reality, it’s IMPOSSIBLE for any person to accept everyone’s advances and admiration. If we did that we’d never have a steady partner or ever be able to settle into the relationships that work for us. But, this applies to any and everyone. No one is obligated to accept as it is, why would it be for them to be mean about it. I would think something is seriously wrong with any person if they wanted me to give them a rude rejection.

Here’s one upvote to make you deliberate about this a little more.

guava_jam · 2025-10-03T21:27:27+00:00

I understand, and you are a reasonable person. I have never ghosted anyone and the times that I did reject men nicely, some of them were very hostile. Women have been killed for rejecting men. Do you understand what that means? Dead. For saying no. They are gone. Never to be seen again. Saying yes can also mean a death sentence. So I understand where you are coming from but a nice rejection for you is a million times better than a death sentence for a woman.

creamerfam5 · 2025-10-05T04:36:42+00:00

But sometimes it's not that you're ugly or boring it's just that you don't light our fire. Attraction is complex. There's so much in between disgusted by and getting a lady boner from. Would you really want a woman who finds you just fine but not compelling to her to say that you're horrible?

OkWorldliness1323 · 2025-10-03T17:26:50+00:00

Just a thought on this statement.

> The worst type is when they don't even reject you, they just kind of play along and hope you get the hint.

This is kinda you're own fault. Interact with enough women and you can see the difference between low and high interest. You'll never accept anything less than high interest and you can quickly weed these people out. People are incapable of wasting your time. Only you can do that. I stopped trying to win women over and only invest in people investing in me and it's been a lot better mentally.

Personal_Dirt3089 · 2025-10-03T19:15:28+00:00

proser30 · 2025-10-06T12:51:14+00:00

It does feel cringy. when it happens, but its best to shrug it and say ok later here's my instagram take care... Then keep posting cool interesting things you are doing showing you don't need here.. If she's interested she may message you later.. Or may not, your life is too valuable to let her get to you..

Or you can respond with ok cool, anyways I gotta get to this event I have planned etc.. take care..

Maps_and_Politics · 2025-10-03T14:23:32+00:00

Shoutout to the guy who instantly downvoted my post.

That's dedication.

GroundbreakingAct434 · 2026-03-12T22:43:32+00:00

“Good luck in your search” lol!

HiraldoCoil · 2025-10-05T06:39:37+00:00

I have travelled a short while with an alpha-male prototype, which taught me that there are certain types of men who never get to hear those words of rejection. I have seen pickups which were paltry work on all types of young attractive women and fully understand that if I or any other betamale attempted them, they would fail very quickly. If I have to be absolutely objective, it looks to me like you need to look at women only in a sexual context and not a dating one, especially when dealing with women in their 20-30s.

Here's a basic script: rollup to a woman on the street with your "pimp-wagon" and say "Hey you're beautiful, where are you going, give me your number" this has worked successfully for him and I 10 times out of 10. From there I like to keep them on hold while entertaining other women sometimes for weeks, some do drop off. When I do meet them, it's alcohol and maybe mcdonalds and then it's uncomfortable car sex.

What drove me to PUA then Heartiste then RooshV then redpill mgtow and the like was the frustration I felt being rejected even though I was the perfect goody 2 shoes protector/provider type, which mostly attracted single moms. Nothing wrong with single moms but not very ideal if you're still inexperienced yourself.

Title	Being nicely rejected hurts me more than just being flat out rejected
Author	Maps_and_Politics
Upvotes	13
Comments	46
Date	October 3, 2025 2:15 PM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/1nx0ctk/being_nicely_rejected_hurts_me_more_than_just/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/being-nicely-rejected-hurts-me-more-than-just.1563351 https://theredarchive.com/post/1563351

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