James Sexton is a NYC divorce lawyer with 25+ years of experience and aithor

Q: How should men handle a breakup?
James: Be the kind of man you’d want your daughter or sister to date. No drunk hate texts at 2 AM, no social media harassment. Grieve privately, then move on. The worst thing is becoming the villain in their story-it’ll haunt you way more than them.

Q: What’s the biggest myth about divorce?
James: That it’s like ripping off a band-aid, quick and clean. Reality? It’s like heart surgery with a butter knife. Emotionally, financially, legallyit drags. And kids? They’re the real victims if parents aren’t careful.

Q: What about kids during divorce? You compared it to Batman vs Joker.
James: Divorce can reward cruelty. Think Batman vs Joker. Batman has rules:ethics, morals. Joker? Doesn’t care about collateral damage. Often, the ruthless parent who manipulates kids or uses alienation is rewarded. The other parent tries to do the right thing, but the system sometimes favors the villain.

Q: What is parental alienation?
James: One parent turns the child against the other: “Your dad doesn’t love you” or constantly sabotages visitation. Courts are slow to notice, the manipulative parent often gets temporary custody that sticks, and kids end up traumatized, loyal to the wrong parent.

Q: How do you fight it as a lawyer?
James: Document everything:texts, emails, therapist reports. Build a pattern. Therapy is mandatory. But it’s tough; the system often favors “stability” over truth.

Q: Psychological impact on kids?
James: Long-term, it’s bad. Anxiety, depression, attachment issues. Studies show alienated kids are 2–3x more likely to have mental health problems as adults. This isn’t a phase:it leaves scars!

Q: Do people learn from divorce or repeat mistakes?
James: 50/50. Some do therapy and change. Others? Same mistakes, new name. I always say: date divorced people bc they know the exits 🤣

Q: Red flags before marriage?
James: Money conflicts, over-involved family, constant victim mentality. And compulsive porn: it silently kills intimacy.

Q: Last words for anyone struggling?

James: It’ll pass. You’re stronger than the pain. Get a GOOD lawyer, a better therapist, and remember: freedom is worth more than resentment.