Is your goal to get laid on the first date?

Then if she doesn't show clear positive excitement towards you within the first 10 minutes, end the date on the spot!

It's very unlikely that the date will lead to sex. It could still lead to great chats, kissing, or a second date. But having sex on this date? No! From experience, that's probably not happening.

If you're bad at dates and just want to practice chatting, then by all means spend several hours with her. It's good practice! Or if you don't mind going on several dates to have sex - then by all means play the slow game. It's all good.

But if you're like me, and you want to get laid the same day. You need that excitement. She needs to come to the date ready to have sex, and she has to have that excitement towards you that shows she's interested.

Just as a quick guide - some ways she can show excitement:

  • Smiles smiles smiles. The more smiles, the bigger the smiles - the better.
  • Reaches out to give you a big hug right away when you meet.
  • She leans towards you.
  • She asks you questions.
  • She seems happy.

Some signs sex is probably not happening (end the date early if your goal is sex):

  • Almost no smiles, laughs, or big expressions. Recognize the stone face.
  • Everything she does seems slow and deliberate. As if she's holding back a bit / guarding herself.
  • Yapping about herself, but rarely asking you anything. It's almost just a monologue about how amazing she is.
  • Asking you questions that seem critical towards your career. Questions about your intentions (sex, relationship etc.) can be a positive. But if it's about your general life trajectory, it's a red flag.

I could have saved myself SOOOO much time and money if I had followed this rule consistently in the past. But alas, I kept on trying too hard every single time - even if it wasn't there. Learned my lesson.