For all of you looking to take some nice pot-shots at me, here you go.

My wife's getting ready for bed. I initiate. As usual, she brings up that she's only been on the mini-pill for 3 weeks and her doctor said it's not effective for the first 4. I've repeatedly told her I'm not worried about it. Literally every legit website plus a doctor I talked to in person have all said 48 hours, not 28 days. She gets worked up about this discrepancy. I'm not worried about it. So, I proceed and she readily obliges.

About 30 minutes in, she stops me and says, "Just so you know, I'm ovulating right now." I say, "I know." She asks how and I just say, "The little things." That really turns her on and we continue. She stops me again and says, "Well, just in case, you probably shouldn't finish inside." I'm cool with that - I wasn't planning on it anyway (I like to change it up frequently). After we're eventually done, she starts worrying because it hasn't been the full 28 days yet. So, I pull up the webmd article that says 48 hours to allay her concerns - "Whether you're just starting or if you miss a pill, it's effective 48 hours afterward."

She laughs and drops: "Oh, well I forgot to take my pill yesterday."

Although I didn't finish inside her, she starts bringing up the sperm in my natural lubricant. I tell her I'm not worried about it and she shouldn't be either. Another passionate kiss and I'm in the basement to screw around on reddit and get some work done.


Now, I have 2 key concerns:

  1. She didn't know I knew she was ovulating and waited until half way through to tell me.

  2. She didn't tell me she missed a pill until afterward.

I'm confident she doesn't want to get pregnant again right now (we just had a baby in June and both agreed no more). I'm also not really worried about her being pregnant after tonight. So, maybe there's no problem. But, her failure to disclose important information is certainly a serious concern and I'm pretty confident you'll all agree that risking having another child unexpectedly is not the time for the DNGAF attitude.

Is this simply a matter of communicating clearer boundaries (i.e. "You need to tell me when you miss a pill beforehand from now on") or is there some other way I should be responding? Or is this a "no harm, no foul" situation and I should just ignore it? I'm not worked up, but my RP-senses are telling me I shouldn't just ignore this. [Note: My vasec appointment isn't until the end of September - I haven't mentioned that I scheduled it to her yet.]