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Keto alone?

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December 10, 2016
6 upvotes

I know from reading here and elsewhere that a ketogenic diet is one of the best and fastest ways to drop not just weight but actual fat. I have done this diet in the past with moderate success. The problem is that when I had moderate success I was pretty BP (still am really) and I let my wife talk me into to cheating way too often.

My wife needs to lose probably 20-25 pounds while I need to drop a ton (40 at least). However she refuses to do keto. She thinks she needs carbs and sweet and I cannot sway her. I have been doing a restricted calorie diet but still cannot hold frame enough to stop allowing myself to cheat too often to see any real results. This is my fault and blame no one but me.

My question is, those of you who did keto or any other lifestyle change diet, did you do it alone or did your wife/family eat the same foods?


Post Information
Title Keto alone?
Author prematureredpill
Upvotes 6
Comments 50
Date 10 December 2016 01:25 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/206793
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/5hk3tq/keto_alone/
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Comments

[–]redearththeory14 points15 points  (4 children) | Copy

Alone. I'm 7 weeks in 15 lbs down and I haven't even told her about it. I just make vague excuses about having had a big lunch, or not eating before I lift. Fuck what your wife thinks. No one puts food in your mouth but you.

[–]prematureredpill[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Do you have kids?

[–]redearththeory0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yup. Two of them are under 4 yo.

[–]prematureredpill[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

So do they eat normal? Or whatever you make they eat? I find adding kids to the mix makes it alittle more complicate. I have 2 under 4 as well.

[–]redearththeory1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

My kids eat a totally different diet to me. On weekdays I've adjusted my schedule to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner at work. On weekends I sit with my kids while they eat but they don't sit with me while I eat and I generally prepare my own food.

[–]Mrpnewb5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Keto is magic. I did it without my wife. She lives off of carbs but keeps her calories down and stays thin. While I dropped 50lbs in 6 months. Don't be a bitch.

This is your journey. Just do it and stop worrying about her. Go grocery shopping without her and buy the shit that you need.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (8 children) | Copy

Not only do you have to Keto alone. You are alone in this life and you will die alone, no matter how many people are around you. The sooner you realize it, the sooner you can be happy.

[–]RuleZeroDADRed Beret1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

Sometimes you go real dark, real fast FT.

Keep positive this Winter.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

If I write the following, most people don't see it as dark or have a problem with it…….

You are alone in this life and you will die alone no matter how many people are around you. The sooner you realize it, the sooner you can be happy.

The part about die alone is hard for many people. It is hard as this stark reality is not easy to accept. I understand that this is my reality, and, I have no expectation that others would embrace it.

From my perspective, and this goes back to when I was young, I believe that there is nothing more personal than one's own death. I have been at the side of many people that I cared deeply for at the moment of their death; 2 grandparents, both my parents, a sister, and others.

No one can do it for you. Yes you can have people with you, but it is not possible for them to actually share the experience with you. That final breath, those final moments are very personal and, yes, in that last moment, we are alone. Yes, alone, no matter how many people are around you.

This is not a bad, or negative, or dark thing, it just is. How often in life we seek aloneness by going to the woods, by meditating, by allowing ourselves to not interact with anyone. Just as there is nothing wrong with being alone while living, there is certainly nothing askew when we recognize that the final act of dying, our last breath, is our last act that we do and we must do alone.

Believing that anyone can ease our exit from this plane of existence, is not what is going to happen, again, no matter how many well-wishers there might be in attendance. For me there is comfort in this, not dark at all. Best

[–]RuleZeroDADRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I might be projecting a bit. I've had my own brushes with death personally, and as I've spoken with my dad, who is your age, and seen him reflect on war and peering into the abyss, I watch for tone.

He's a lot less nihilistic spending his winters in Ocala now. I've never liked Winter, have always hated the holidays. Thanks for the explanation and somehow I think you knew I needed it more than you needed to give one. Happy Holidays.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

have always hated the holidays

We do have much in common. No matter the situation, we gain comfort from that which we share with others.

Happy Holidays!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The most important rule in life is the glass is not half full. It's not half empty. The glass is already broken.

You are the glass.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

He's right though.

[–]redearththeory0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

100%. We walk alone. TFA has a great post about this somewhere.

[–]SteelToeShitKickerRed Beret3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

The whole point of MRP is that you must lead. You are clearly looking to your wife for guidance / help, when it is you that should be directing the way.

Now, that said, you just worry about you. You can't make her lose weight, but I will say that after I started getting noticably muscular, the wife started to get really serious about fitness.

Lead and realize that she will attempt to break your frame by trying to get you to cheat. It's a shit test.

[–]Snowdog19730 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you for this. I've been through this many times and have failed.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm a big fan of Soylent. There are keto versions from other companies. I found it difficult staying on a keto diet without too much brain power for long term, since it seems like there are carbs hidden in everything. This makes it really easy.

https://www.ketochow.xyz/ https://www.ketolent.com/ http://superbodyfuel.com/shop/keto-fuel/

[–]Scubastyles1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yea man, she's testing your resolve. Hold strong.

My ltr will compliment my physical improvements and simultaneously bake cookies; that I won't eat. It seems fucked up but they don't even know they're doing it; awalt I suppose.

Hold strong.

[–]JackGetsIt1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

The ketosis diet is a pain in the ass because everywhere you go you will have to fucking explain yourself to everyone. "What? You don't eat bread?" "One treat will throw you off?" "Isn't red meat bad for you?" After you start to explain the diet to people they want to pin you as a conspiracy theorist because the keto wisdom goes directly against the bullshit Big agribusiness-government partnership pyramid with grains as the foundation.

Then when you get home the keto diet is difficult because most women don't know shit about nutrition and even the ones that do squirrel away chocolate and candy all over their living spaces.

All that being said ketosis is the only way I've personally ever been able to lose weight and keep it off. It's also the only diet that's kept my ravenous food cravings at bay. Every girlfriend I've ever had and my ex wife all eventually started keto dieting because they saw how effective it was. My only word of warning is just an echo of what others have said in this thread. Lead by example. Don't ask your significant other to do it with you. She will eventually come along for the ride on her own when she see's you executing with consistency and not giving in to her or friends and family high carb eating habits.

The only girlfriend that I successfully keto dieted with was after I was deep in the diet and could have like 50 high fiber carbs a day. She would still cook her traditional meals but substitute some higher fiber carb options and cook and serve a lot less of them.

To this day I still only on and off keto diet because of my biggest Nemesis. Beer. Fancy Fancy Beer. Beer and keto do not go well together and I can't bring myself to completely cut it. Right now I'm doing 6 keto days and one carb up day with beer in the mix. It's working out OK. I'm about 10-15 pounds above goal weight but it much better then giving up and being 60 pounds overweight all the time.

[–]prematureredpill[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

You lift during keto or any other exercise?

[–]JackGetsIt1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes I've lifted on full keto but if I'm running a harder lifting schedule with dead lift in the mix I will run out of gas. So right now I'm using a high glycemic index dextrose powder mixed in with my small protein shake 15-20 minutes before heavy lifting sessions. Then after lifting I have a full low/no carb meal and low carb the rest of the day.

This is called TKD or target ketogenic dieting.

Here's a guide: http://www.ruled.me/3-ketogogenic-diets-skd-ckd-tkd/

You have to be careful though because it's easy to overdue. You need a lot fewer carbs then you think to get through a big workout. Especially if you're already keto adapted.

[–]postscript11141 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I would like to know this as well. I've tried no carbs, but I don't feel the ability to progress with lifting. I just felt drained at the gym. Has anyone had success with keto and lifting?

[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are alone in your own house brother. Wife will think about following when you soar past her SMV- which doesn't sound like it will be that hard.

[–]that_italia_guy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Alone. Your wife will just slow you down.

[–]BobbyPeru0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I did it by cutting out and refined sugar, eating more organically, avoiding processed foods, and getting plenty of proteins. Overall caloric input needs to decline - that's the bottom line. I've never worried about carbs and all that stuff, just tried to eat balanced

[–]ford_contourRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Since I didn't marry a close relative, my wife and I have significantly dissimilar genetics, and so my wife and I have to figure out our unique dietary needs separately.

I support her efforts to figure out gut discomfort issues by stocking whatever foods she had been eating most lately, when I do a grocery run.

She supports my efforts to eat clean and stay lean in lots of ways that I'm too focused and self centered to regularly notice.

That said, she wasn't even aware I had changed my diet until I had lost like 20 lbs over the course of six months. She knew I had made a change, but not how significant it was.

She briefly freaked out at the dangers of ketosis when she first found out I had started Atkins, after hitting a wall. But my wife knows l'm an adult who knows how to listen to his body, and seemingly accepted what I told her from what I learned from the Atkins book, or maybe she just realized I was feeling and eating healthier than ever.

Disclaimer: I'm not naturally a really communicative guy. This is as often a flaw as an advantage; and I have very little ability to tell when it's helping or hurting me. I'm not recommending you do as I did.

Also, listen to a doctor or something, or at least read the whole book before you start any new diet.

[–]ImSteveMcQueen0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

We had soup for lunch yesterday. Had a choice between tomato and mushroom. I looked at the labels. Tomato has a ton of sugar in it. Mushroom has 1/3 the carbs and almost no sugar. I start opening the mushroom. She comes along and says the kids and her don't like mushroom soup. I point out the nutrition information. She says "You are neither credible nor knowledgeable on nutrition." I just STFU. I'm strong, fit and very healthy. She can't do a single pushup. Not sure what you can say to someone like that.

Later last night she sends me an unprovoked email on keto.

"Decent article, if you read the whole thing. Starts with some positives I'm assuming your book would have alluded to. Has additional information worth considering. http://www.healthline.com/health-news/keto-diet-is-gaining-popularity-but-is-it-safe-121914

I lost about 20 pounds this fall and look great. Good luck with that shit test.

[–]ImSteveMcQueen0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

People freak out when they see my diet.

  • 4 eggs with mushrooms, onions and cheese for breakfast. With 14% sour cream and cottage cheese. I have the leftovers for a snack. No toast, no cereal.
  • I drink whole (3.25%) milk and water. No juice, no pop. Maybe a diet coke once in a while.
  • I eat real whip cream (35% MF). I never eat sugar icing.
  • I eat peanuts, peanut butter and cashews for snack. Never granola, never fruit bars, never raisins.
  • I eat the fat on my pork chops.
  • I eat cheese when I want it.
  • Candy for me is an orange. I love the taste of them. No chocolate bars, no cake, no bananas. I don't even crave those things any more. When my blood sugar is low, I eat an orange.
  • I order a burger and eat everything but the bun. Mayo, mustard, no ketchup. A cream soup instead of the fries.

I get all sorts of comments. "Bread isn't that bad." "Your arteries are going to clog."

If you want to start a fight, tell people that sweetened yogurt is pretty much the same as ice cream. Or that dried fruit is pretty much the same as jube jubes. Or that chicken wings are good for you. Or that rice cakes are the worst thing you can eat when you are craving food. They flip ! WTF ???

[–]prematureredpill[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think recent news has shown the anti fat argument was rigged. Paid off by the sugar industry. Modern science is showing again and again that sugar is the enemy, not fat.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

your diet depends on your goals.

Rapid weight loss. Keto style will do but it won't support muscle growth long term.

I eat 7 times a day. My meals support a total macros of

  • 150-bodyweight grams of protein a day.
  • 100-200g of carbs (higher on heavy lift days)
  • 25-35g of fiber
  • No more then 30g of sugar
  • 30-40 grams of fat from healthy sources.

[–]prematureredpill[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I need to lose weight. I'll focus on huge muscle gains when I'm not a fat fuck.

[–]mtdog0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

My wife has done well on low carb diets, but eventually cracks and eats a bag of Cheetos. I don't do well on keto - I feel sick and low energy.

Intermittent fasting and portion control are working for me. Down 50 lbs. since last December. Still a fat fuck, but at 49, I am looking at a sustainable lifestyle change, not a quick cut.

Bottom line is that different approaches work for different people. Maybe keto isn't the diet for the Mrs?

[–]ex_addict_broRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

As for my personal experience with dieting changes, see my other comment.

As for keto... no. I tried it a few times. Perhaps it has something to do with my gall bladder, which was removed from my body few years ago. I'm not feeling well on keto. Currently I'm on a kind of IIFYM.com calculated diet, sometimes I eat more fats, sometimes I refeed with carbs, including sugar. I felt like shit on pure keto. Maybe I'd need to stop lifting and doing HIITS and just stick for week or two to keto and low-intensity cardio to burn fat.

But you know what?

Fuck burning fat. I'm not trying to burn fat.

I'm stressing my body. I apply uneasiness to it and see how it reacts.

Of course I keep the diet, I calculate it almost every day, I prepare my meals. How do I know I ate enough protein if I don't.

But I'm not exactly trying to burn fat.

Godspeed.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I have heard of others having trouble with Keto diet after having gall bladder removal. They claim that eating a lot of fat makes them feel crappy.

[–]DaisyDucksdaughter-2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

Just a thought: Keto is known for causing bad breath. Maybe she is afraid of that? It would certainly put me off. Assuming the worst is not always necessary. Maybe Paleo/Primal might be better suited to her.

[–]prematureredpill[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nah man. She's an addict.



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