Background: 33M, just had 3rd child. Low sex marriage, wife has been uninterested and bitchy for better part of last 6 years. Has gotten worse after arrival of recent child. I've been lifting for almost 2 years, and I'm in better shape than I have ever been. Almost to 11% body fat, hitting PRs on heavy lifts. Found RP 2 months ago, and have changed. Fighting back Rambo at home (he shows up at times), but still no tangible response from wife. Hard no's for days. My SMV may be 8, hers is maybe 5.5. She is having trouble shedding baby weight. She is SAHM, I make more money than I ever thought I would.
Shortly after I started to change I started getting IOI from women. I know we all say that, and maybe we all do. But I've never really experienced anything quite like this. I've always been better than average looking, and witty, but its amazing what fearless irrational self confidence produces. Literally my wife's friends are giving me heavy IOI's even with thier husbands around. its all sort of encouraging, but its not like any of it is going anywhere with them, and I don't think much about it.
This past Saturday I went to a football game with a friend. This friend is divorced, 50's and had 2 girls with him that were in from a nearby town for the game. One was in his league (HB4) the other was out of bith our leagues (HB8.5 - 27 yrs old). Or so I initially thought. Long story short (for this part) I basically semi-unconsciously ran game on the hot one for the better part of the afternoon while tailgating. Sure I'm married, but I was interested, like any guy would be for a girl like this. But I truly DGAF about her response. I had internalized so much I've read here that I was doing stuff I never would have done before. Just walking away unannounced, left to go see other friends. I was teasing her about her job, her friends, particularly the friend she was with, her alleged bf I called a "poor fella"? Etc. I was even internally looking at myself thinking "who the fuck is this guy? Where did this come from?" Its so hard at home, but it was so easy there. By the time we are getting ready to go in the stadium I am lighly kino-ing her. Elbow jabs, light shoves, arm around her. As we are fighting through the crowd to our seats, she is following me and grabs my bicep to hold on. I act non-chalant as fuck. The girl's seats are different from ours so we separate. I basically just walk away. By the end of the first half her friend is texting my friend that girl in question would not mind coming to sit with me. So be it. The second half is a display of game, kino, and her coming on to me like I have never experienced from a girl like this. I just stuck to the new me and it kept growing. She subtly tells me she likes me. On the way out of the stadium we get separated from the others and start holding hands. I pull her behind a AC chiller and we start making out. I have not kissed anyone other than my wife since we married nearly 9 years ago. And I have not been kissed with this much passion since then I think. I can't even remember. I refrained from getting too handsy and I come to my senses and tell her we need to get out of here. So we go meet up with the others and I tell them I'm going home and walk back to my truck. The look on her face was priceless. I quietly said some beta shit to her about not to feel guilty, this was my choice, I'm sorry but I need to go home, etc. On the walk back to the truck I add her on facebook. While we are sitting in traffic we start messaging. She wants me to come over to where she is staying. I've already decided I'm not going to do that, but I play along because I'm stuck in traffic and I have not had these things said to me in years. The more I deflect, the stronger she comes on. She tells me she wants me badly and wants me to fuck her. I'm not even going to type out some of the other stuff. Just unreal shit. I go home. No contact since.
Sorry for the wall of text, but I literally have no one else to tell this to, but I had to get it out. An odd type of victim puke to be sure. I'm impressed and disgusted with myself all at once. I know we all say here the grass is greener on the other side of divorce for a bit, but then it all evens out. I don't want a divorce, I want to be with my family and raise my kids in one house. But, I don't know how I am going to go through a lifetime of women acting this way, and no sex or even remote interest from my wife.
TL;DR I gamed a chick, surprised by how well this shit works, and now I'm guilty and confused.